Speaking in tongues:
You stopped two verses short in 1 Corinthians 14.
1Cor 14:12-13,
12 Even so ye, forasmuch as ye are zealous of spiritual [gifts], seek that ye may excel to the edifying of the church.
13 Wherefore let him that speaketh in an [unknown] tongue pray that he may interpret.
Speaking in tongues without interpretation is for the believer's private prayer life. Verse 4 says that it edifies, builds up, the believer.
But, if someone stands in the middle of a service and starts speaking in tongues then sits down, then that person becomes as a crazy barbarian to the others in that service (1 Cor 14:11, 14:23). Therefore, Paul says that we must interpret in the language of the majority of those in that meeting so that everybody, not just the speaker, gets edified (1 Cor 14:5). Prophecy is equal to speaking in tongues with interpretation in that in both cases the church can get a message from God in their own language.
Addressing a guy who is beating on you:
I think there are innumerable ways that we can show love for our enemy, but in some way shape or form, it involves giving something to them. "For God so love that He
gave..." Correcting them is certainly a good possibility, but not the only one. Jesus gave his life without ever trying to correct the soldiers who were pounding nails into his hands and feet. Apparently that was the way to handle that situation. Every situation is different.
How does one know what to do in a particular situation? Sorry to say it, but the only way to know for sure is to operate the manifestation of word of knowledge and word of wisdom. I don't see any other method in the scriptures to gain information from God about a specific situation. The book is full of instances where God speaks to people about a specific situation. The scriptures certainly tell us a lot of things, but the book is only so big. It can't possible cover all possible interactions you will have in this life. Enter stage right the manifestations of the spirit. God gave it to you and He is just waiting for you to operate it so He can tell you how to handle any situation in which you may find yourself.
Rom 12:20-21,
20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.
21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
Trying to defeat darkness with darkness is futile. It just just gets darker. But there is no amount of darkness that can extinguish even the tiniest amount of light. Light dispels darkness. That is a physical law, and even more than a law in the spiritual realm.