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My scientific refutation of anthropogenic climate change

I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
 

Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...

None of the above, but option C might have potential. Any opportunity to call out the hypocrisy of celebrities and other wealthy types can help.
 

Evangelicalhumanist

"Truth" isn't a thing...
Premium Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
Option A is the standard (but usually tacit) opening -- so much so that it's becoming quite trite. I'd avoid it.

Aption B will take far, far too much work, as one must assume that the list is nearly endless if you must begin that way.

Option C sounds like your best bet selling copies: it won't explain anything, but you'll get readers wondering if they'll find out which celebrities are diddling with which other ones during climate crises.
 
Of course, it is a real scientific argument.

However, whenever I want to show it to an actual climate scientist, the dog eats it or I accidentally leave it on the bus. Then I have no choice but to use the standard codswallop that all the other climate-change deniers use. Do you think this might leave the scientists with the impression that I don't have a real scientific argument after all?
 

Viker

Your beloved eccentric Auntie Cristal
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
1) Find nearest dumpster.

2) Toss argument inside.

3) Set it all ablaze. (Only an option)
 

sayak83

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
This is another joke right?
 

Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber & Business Owner
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
Don't.
 

Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
Of course, it is a real scientific argument.

However, whenever I want to show it to an actual climate scientist, the dog eats it or I accidentally leave it on the bus. Then I have no choice but to use the standard codswallop that all the other climate-change deniers use. Do you think this might leave the scientists with the impression that I don't have a real scientific argument after all?

The best excuse I've heard was in a funny scene in the movie "The In Laws," with Peter Falk and Alan Arkin. He was telling a story about tsetse flies in Guatemala the size of eagles, and he had taken photos of it. However, he left the film in a jacket which got Martinized.

 

The Hammer

Skald
Premium Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...

You can't, so don't.
 

GoodAttention

Active Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...

Please let me be your et al.
 

It Aint Necessarily So

Veteran Member
Premium Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
You might be trolling us, but I'll take you at face value:

Why do you think that you can successfully refute the consensus of the community of climate scientists if you "don't know much about climate science"?

Why do you think celebrities are relevant to a scientific argument?

When you say publish, publish might mean submit for publication in a peer reviewed journal, or it might mean post to the Internet. If it's the former, you'd need to learn how to write a scientific paper, which has a formal style and acceptable vocabulary (your three options all violate that style, which seldom contains the word "I").

A notorious creationist named Kent Hovind submitted a Ph.D. thesis to a diploma mill Christian "university" (it occupied a trailer) that has become infamous for its unprofessionalism and failure to meet academic standards. Here's a critique of it that might help you avoid some errors:

The Dissertation Kent Hovind Doesn't Want You to Read

Of course, if what you plan to do is post it to the Internet, it doesn't need to meet any standards. Write whatever you like.

Finally, you probably know that your paper has no chance of accomplishing what you seem to think it can. Anthropogenic global warming is established as fact in the scientific community and the scientifically literate lay community. What you are proposing has as little chance of success as a flat-earther trying to do the same thing for his minority opinion.
 
David Starkey said that in the seventies they were predicting an ice age. I don't know who 'they' were, but it's David Starkey and he's on the television. Also, Taylor Swift goes everywhere in a private jet.

There. That shows it's possible to type garbage arguments against climate change. Now I'll show you a real scientific one:


Would you believe it? I definitely have a real scientific refutation of anthropogenic climate change, but when I tried to type it there was a mysterious force field that stopped my fingers reaching the keyboard. I'll try again later when it has hopefully gone.

It is a real scientific argument though.
 

wellwisher

Well-Known Member
Don’t publish it. Anthropogenic climate change is real.
That is not exactly true, in terms of the high standards of science verification. This cycle of climate change, is not even finished. We have maybe gone half way through the first experiment. After it is finally completes, will need a second cycle, as a second experiment, to make sure the first is not a fluke or is being erroneous inferred and attached.

You cannot just publish a paper and assume that is enough to prove anything, even if it is thought provoking. Another, independent group needs to duplicate the results of the premise, of manmade climate change, with a new second experiment, which has not yet happened, since the first experiment is still running. This premise has never happened in the history of the earth. One cycle is not fully verified, scientifically, until it is duplicated.

This slack appears to be a Lefty, ram it through the system scam, that violates the duplicate verification step of science. The rules are you cannot have the same team run the duplicate, since they are biased; control over funding. You need another team, which because this got so political; consensus of science scam, has to be composed of scientists with other theories, not in the consensus. Consensus is a political term and adds subjectivity. Consensus of science is an oxymoron. Science is about fact that is self standing and self evident to all. Consensus of opinion is which tooth paste tastes better.

Natural Climate change has plenty of data, over a billion years, that extends to dozens of complete cycles. That theory has been verified to be possible on earth, with dozens of natural tests/complete cycles, to show how the earth, all by itself, can do this under a wide range of conditions. That is the only theory that satisfies the verification rules of science. The manmade premise is being driven by politics and not by full science duplication. A biased consensus, which is the nature of consensus; subjective, is not real science; politically advantageous.

That aside, say we did finally verify man made global warming and climate change, along with a second complete cycle test. The third set of assumed premises, which can be potentially dangerous to world's populations, is what do we do about it to make the earth better?
None of the doom and gloom prediction, connected to the third set of premises, have panned out; the poles are still there and the coastline is not flooded. This year hurricane season is nothing special, compared to the doom and gloom predictions of what to do.

The theory behind the third set; what to do, is still way half baked. This is because we have not competed even one cycle, to have an idea of what to expect, such as how the earth helps and how we can help the earth with parallel efforts. Based on science, nothing should be done until there is proof the third set of premise, will work and are verified. Climate change is about science and not ram if through the system politics, right? The Political Left, who is pushing ram it through man made climate change, is prone to lying and disinformation. You cannot count on them to be honest. VP Harris is all about creating a TV Presidential persona but lacks on policy; solution logic. Fear is also one of their main tactics; man made is an existential threat to humanity. This is why we need to stick to science and hope science has not been too corrupted by politics.

We need to wait to act, but react in real time to changes, while avoiding major political overhauls until there is proof and duplicate verification that what we try to do will work. If not then scam artists will lead us to disaster. If the scam artists do act too early, maybe we can put their freedom as collateral, say mandatory jail time, if their schemes leads to worse social problems. We can even allow citizens to hunt them down for the pain they will cause. Or is maybe, it is better to wait for science to reach its final duplication conclusions.
 

Pete in Panama

Well-Known Member
David Starkey said that in the seventies they were predicting an ice age. I don't know who 'they' were, but it's David Starkey and he's on the television. Also, Taylor Swift goes everywhere in a private jet.

There. That shows it's possible to type garbage arguments against climate change. Now I'll show you a real scientific one:


Would you believe it? I definitely have a real scientific refutation of anthropogenic climate change, but when I tried to type it there was a mysterious force field that stopped my fingers reaching the keyboard. I'll try again later when it has hopefully gone.

It is a real scientific argument though.
This is great & I thank you for sharing such a hoot! You had me going there for a minute 'cause I really thought you were going to get into the science stuff but hey, I like a good laugh as much as the next guy.
 

Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
David Starkey said that in the seventies they were predicting an ice age. I don't know who 'they' were, but it's David Starkey and he's on the television. Also, Taylor Swift goes everywhere in a private jet.

There. That shows it's possible to type garbage arguments against climate change. Now I'll show you a real scientific one:


Would you believe it? I definitely have a real scientific refutation of anthropogenic climate change, but when I tried to type it there was a mysterious force field that stopped my fingers reaching the keyboard. I'll try again later when it has hopefully gone.

It is a real scientific argument though.

This reminds me of a time back in grade school. There was one girl in my class who never seemed to have her homework, and she would always have some excuse for not doing it. Of course, she used the cliched "my dog ate it," as well as variations of how her dog destroyed her homework in other ways. Another time, she had no paper. Then there was another time where she said the heater wasn't working at her house, so they had to burn her homework to keep from freezing to death.
 

PureX

Veteran Member
I'm almost ready to publish my one-hundred-percent scientific argument which indisputably proves that anthropogenic climate change is a myth.

The only thing I haven't decided on is how to introduce it. What do you think? Which of these would be the best way to start my opening sentence?

Option A:
I don't know much about climate science, but...

Option B:
The thing I don't understand about global warming is...

Option C:
If climate change is real, then how do you explain all these celebrities who...
Go with the classics ... "Greed is good for mankind".
 
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