Obviously, this is dificult..........

[Smoke]

I desperately needed a mother figure. My mother had never bonded with me, and whenever I couldn't cope, I used to resort to that behaviour........it was a way of substituting the woman I missed, that I had needed. Since then, I have never needed to resort to that behaviour (Thank goodness). I think the key was in knowing 'why'.

Michel, I'm glad you feel able to share your experiences with the forums; it can be intimidating to put yourself out there in public like that. But I really think that you need to get past the idea that cross-dressing is a serious problem, or some kind of undesirable behavior. I've known a lot of men (and a few women) who liked to cross-dress, some of them gay and some of them heterosexual, and I really don't see it as a problem in itself. It's true that the reactions of other people may be a problem, unfortunately.

People seem to accept female cross-dressers better than male cross-dressers, and I suspect that has something to do with the lingering sexism in Western society. A man who dresses in women's clothing is seen as debasing himself, doing something degrading, while a woman who dresses in men's clothing is not. A moment's reflection is enough to see that attitude can't be rational.

What I'm trying to say is, you understand and accept the needs and desires that led up to this behavior, and I think it would be good if you could come to accept the behavior, too. Not saying you should start it back up (unless you want to), just that you should learn not to be ashamed of having done it. Even if there aren't a lot of men on these forums who have experienced this, it's still very common, and there's nothing to be ashamed of at all.

 

[Rejected]

Michel, I'm glad you are finally able to give light to this thing that has been locked away for so long. I know how it feels to finally be able to get something like that off of one's chest, and how terrifying it can be when done face-to-face.

All too often society places a stigma on things that are totally unnecessary. This subject is one of them. Some people like to wear women's clothing; others like to do things that I’ll have the decency not to post. The point is who cares as long as no one gets hurt? What difference should it make if you wear women’s underwear; if it makes you feel better for some reason you can't explain then do it. If you feel ashamed of it then determine the root of those desires, address them and move on.

It doesn't make you a bad person or sick, the only problems are the one that arise from your own feelings about the situation. You seem to have come out the other side of your dilemma relatively unscathed, and you will always have my respect, as much as that my mean to you.

 

[Draka]

I don't know why there is such a stigma attached to men wearing women's clothing. There is no reason that I can think of that they should be made to feel ashamed or as if they have done anything wrong. No one even blinks when a woman wears a man's clothing. In fact it is quite normal. When it comes down to it, clothing is clothing. Whatever style or cut is most comfortable with you then that's what you feel comfortable in. Period.

 

[zombieharlot]

Michel, this is actually quite interesting to me. Most of the people who are on this site regularly know that I cross-dress. But my experiences are different from yours (although, I have never recieved a professional opinion). For me, it seems to have stemmed solely from curiousity. My first cross-dressing occurance was when I was four years old and in Kindergarten. I wore my sister's pantyhose to school. After that, I can remember occurances of secretly wearing her tutu and trying on her lacey socks. And then through jr. high, I can recall drawing, with non-toxic Crayola markers, on my face like makeup. And then throughout highschool here and there, I actually purchased articles of female clothing. With all of that said, this is interesting to me because I have never thought of cross-dressing as a means of coping. And because of that, I never knew that gender dysphoria was something that could be treated in such a way to have it disappear. But I suppose each case is different. I would really like to know what a professional thought on my matters.
Anyway, it is great that you have found exactly what was going on and have been able to deal with everything appropriately. Coming out with these things certainly is hard, so it's good to find a group of people who are open and don't discriminate. I find many people here are like that, which is why I am so open about myself here. So, I'm glad you're here and have been able to be open about yourself too. Best wishes to you, Michel.

 

[Purple Thyme]

That was courageous. :clap i'm glad you got to share. I bet its not so big of a secret now and not such a burden on you shoulders. I think alot of you for sharing that. It's not that uncommon. I had a boyfriend back in the day that would go to my apartment and try on my things when I wasn't there. He would come and tell me later. We split but always remained close friends even Majikthise was friends with him. I loved my friend and his cross dressing never bothered me. Many of our friends knew about his 'little secret' too. I don't understand why people can't accept things that do not hurt anybody else.

 

[carcasia123]

Everyone has thier own battles/life experiences/secret actions. You are courageous to share yours.

 

[Mike182]

Michel, i love you no matter what :hug:

you have a kind, warm, loving heart and i don't think anyone who knows you would be able to judge you in a negative light!