The only pirate palaver I do is "Arrgghhh!".
I also do Australian: "Crikey!", "A dingo ate my baby", "Put another shrimp on the baby....er, barbie!"'
I even set my GPS to have an Aussie accent. (I named her "Sara" to vex some Democrats on a trip.)
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OK, so it's personal...
- Thread starter Just_me_Mike
- Start date
The only pirate palaver I do is "Arrgghhh!".
I also do Australian: "Crikey!", "A dingo ate my baby", "Put another shrimp on the baby....er, barbie!"'
I even set my GPS to have an Aussie accent. (I named her "Sara" to vex some Democrats on a trip.)
You look OK to me, Mike.
Herr Heinrich
Student of Mythology
You look perfectly fine. People are stupid.
kai
ragamuffin
Thats what i thought to.
Kathryn
It was on fire when I laid down on it.
Hi, Mike,
First of all, let me tell you that if that's really you in those pictures (heh!) then you not only look fine - you look FINE. I am assuming that your challenge has something to do with your left eye, which I can't see well in the pictures. Even so, there's nothing grotesque or weird at all about the way you look. In fact, there are many downright attractive things about your looks.
I almost hate to use this as an example, because I've been accused of using my kids to establish "street cred" or seem cool (weird but now I'm self conscious about it) - but as you may know, I have four bi racial kids, very close together in age. When I was a young mom and would take my kids out in public, people would often stare at us.
Pretty early on, I figured out that most people were probably not staring out of hatefulness. There were many reasons for them to stare - first of all, that's a lot of kids. Secondly, they were very cute kids - but they sure didn't look like they belonged with me. I think people often were trying to figure out "Are those kids HERS? Biologically?"
I could either just assume that they were all prejudiced (which would be prejudiced and judgmental on my part), or I could give people the benefit of the doubt.
I began to see a positive challenge in this situation. I determined that IF people were prejudiced, then I would challenge their preconceived ideas, by being exactly what they did not expect me to be. And I would be gracious with them rather than defensive.
In other words, I began to look at people's surprise and sometimes probably negative reaction as an opportunity to prove their prejudices WRONG.
In the long run, this made me a better person.
Smile. Look them straight in the eye. Strike up a conversation on a positive note. Surprise the hell out of them.
Everyone will be better off! Seriously, you will feel better - and empowered.
First of all, let me tell you that if that's really you in those pictures (heh!) then you not only look fine - you look FINE. I am assuming that your challenge has something to do with your left eye, which I can't see well in the pictures. Even so, there's nothing grotesque or weird at all about the way you look. In fact, there are many downright attractive things about your looks.
I almost hate to use this as an example, because I've been accused of using my kids to establish "street cred" or seem cool (weird but now I'm self conscious about it) - but as you may know, I have four bi racial kids, very close together in age. When I was a young mom and would take my kids out in public, people would often stare at us.
Pretty early on, I figured out that most people were probably not staring out of hatefulness. There were many reasons for them to stare - first of all, that's a lot of kids. Secondly, they were very cute kids - but they sure didn't look like they belonged with me. I think people often were trying to figure out "Are those kids HERS? Biologically?"
I could either just assume that they were all prejudiced (which would be prejudiced and judgmental on my part), or I could give people the benefit of the doubt.
I began to see a positive challenge in this situation. I determined that IF people were prejudiced, then I would challenge their preconceived ideas, by being exactly what they did not expect me to be. And I would be gracious with them rather than defensive.
In other words, I began to look at people's surprise and sometimes probably negative reaction as an opportunity to prove their prejudices WRONG.
In the long run, this made me a better person.
Smile. Look them straight in the eye. Strike up a conversation on a positive note. Surprise the hell out of them.
Everyone will be better off! Seriously, you will feel better - and empowered.
dawny0826
Mother Heathen
These are my thoughts as well.
Uh huh. We all know you are lying Heather you love pirates.
The Neo Nerd
Well-Known Member
I agree with mystic, the pirate thing has been done to death. However a nice heavy metal t-shirt would look great with the hair.
And i'm jealous of the beard. I got a goatee but it's no where near as cool.
-Q
Just_me_Mike
Well-Known Member
Thanks again everyone... Plenty of food for thought.
Kat I can see how this would be very similar and I am glad you overcame it, might have been much tougher for you 50 years ago ya know! Actually I can't imagine it 50 years ago in some towns.
I am sure 99% of what happens with me is all in my head, and it is something I have to work on. As Alcaste pointed out, I can only really control how I react and feel about those situations. Easier said then done though, but I'll try...
A
angellous_evangellous
Guest
I'm sorry, Mike. I just don't see a deformity in the pics. 
A
angellous_evangellous
Guest
No, I don't think that you are. It's perfectly natural to be uncomfortable with the reactions that you've encountered.
The best thing to do, IMHO, is to handle the situation as positively as possible for yourself and not other people. Draw strength and positive energy from the people that love you, and don't let the negative energy from others affect you.
As you hinted on page one... I think that it would be very good for you to seek professional help from a psychologist. Your emotional pain does not need to be severe before you seek help.
Just_me_Mike
Well-Known Member
Thanks AE, may I ask in jest of course. do you secretly get checks from the Psychology Associates of America? You seem to be a huge advocate of using them
Now, not in jest, any personal experience on your part using them? I have only worked with a Psycho Analyst years ago, but many discredit their work these days...
A
angellous_evangellous
Guest
Thanks AE, may I ask in jest of course. do you secretly get checks from the Psychology Associates of America? You seem to be a huge advocate of using them
Now, not in jest, any personal experience on your part using them? I have only worked with a Psycho Analyst years ago, but many discredit their work these days...
No, I don't receive checks from them.
And yes, I do have personal experience in seeing both a psychologist and psychiatrist. The best thing about a psychologist - for me - was assistance in getting to the root of emotional/psychological distress.
You may know this - but the key in your case is not what other people do to you - but how you respond to others and your own insecurities in a healthy, constructive way.
My recommendations for people to seek help is just like if I see someone with flu symptoms and encourage them to see a doctor about it.