Please Help Me Weed Out My Bad Opinions -- That is, my Inoffensive Ones.

[Sunstone]

Sorting through my opinions tonight, I notice that most -- but far from all -- of my opinions are offensive. This deeply and gravely concerns me because, naturally, I want all of them to be offensive. I mean, why stop short, slack off, when perfection is within grasp?

Consequently, I'm asking for your esteemed help in assisting me to perfect my opinions. If you know of any inoffensive opinion or opinions I might harbor, please point them out to me immediately. Time is of the essence here. I need to have all my ducks lined up before my cherished and adorable young nephews visit me again. After all, it just won't due if I lose my spot in their hearts as their most insufferable uncle.

 

[Terese]

I’d say you have the magnanimous quality of not rejecting opinions that may seem foreign to you, but then i remember that there are some people who would take offence to such a thing. Sorry pal

 

[Sunstone]

I’d say you have the magnanimous quality of not rejecting opinions that may seem foreign to you...

Well, that certainly was demeaning! What have I ever done to you to deserve that?

..but then i remember that there are some people who would take offence to such a thing.

Thank goodness! For a moment there, you had me truly worried.

 

[sandy whitelinger]

Sorting through my opinions tonight, I notice that most -- but far from all -- of my opinions are offensive. This deeply and gravely concerns me because, naturally, I want all of them to be offensive. I mean, why stop short, slack off, when perfection is within grasp?

Consequently, I'm asking for your esteemed help in assisting me to perfect my opinions. If you know of any inoffensive opinion or opinions I might harbor, please point them out to me immediately. Time is of the essence here. I need to have all my ducks lined up before my cherished and adorable young nephews visit me again. After all, it just won't due if I lose my spot in their hearts as their most insufferable uncle.

I'd just go ahead and shoot myself.

 

[Sunstone]

I'd just go ahead and shoot myself.

Already tried that. The pistol misfired as I was withdrawing it from my waistband and I was abruptly reduced to three inches, down from nine.

 

[sandy whitelinger]

Already tried that. The pistol misfired as I was withdrawing it from my waistband and I was abruptly reduced to three inches, down from nine.

It was the waistbands fault. But I feel for ya on the 3" thing. I was that size once. In the womb. When i was born they almost cut it off thinking it was my umbilical cord.

 

[David T]

I’d say you have the magnanimous quality of not rejecting opinions that may seem foreign to you, but then i remember that there are some people who would take offence to such a thing. Sorry pal

Sorting through my opinions tonight, I notice that most -- but far from all -- of my opinions are offensive. This deeply and gravely concerns me because, naturally, I want all of them to be offensive. I mean, why stop short, slack off, when perfection is within grasp?

Consequently, I'm asking for your esteemed help in assisting me to perfect my opinions. If you know of any inoffensive opinion or opinions I might harbor, please point them out to me immediately. Time is of the essence here. I need to have all my ducks lined up before my cherished and adorable young nephews visit me again. After all, it just won't due if I lose my spot in their hearts as their most insufferable uncle.

Don't do it people don't Like change you will scare the children and adults will murmur that you seem off strange, unhinged, by this new nice person thing.

 

[PureX]

Sorting through my opinions tonight, I notice that most -- but far from all -- of my opinions are offensive. This deeply and gravely concerns me because, naturally, I want all of them to be offensive. I mean, why stop short, slack off, when perfection is within grasp?

Consequently, I'm asking for your esteemed help in assisting me to perfect my opinions. If you know of any inoffensive opinion or opinions I might harbor, please point them out to me immediately. Time is of the essence here. I need to have all my ducks lined up before my cherished and adorable young nephews visit me again. After all, it just won't due if I lose my spot in their hearts as their most insufferable uncle.

As long as your opinion of yourself remains offensive to all who encounter you, everything else will follow suit.

 

[Spiderman]

This seems in response to some of the heated topics and offensive opinions at RF lately.

It's good to see that some people can take such things lightly and respond with humor

 

[sun rise]

I'm offended by your asking about your offensive opinions. If you don't stop being offended by your offensive opinions I might just have to consult DSM-5 and pin a few offensive diagnoses on you along with an extremely detailed and utterly offensive torrent of words.

 

[Skwim]

Sorting through my opinions tonight, I notice that most -- but far from all -- of my opinions are offensive. This deeply and gravely concerns me because, naturally, I want all of them to be offensive. I mean, why stop short, slack off, when perfection is within grasp?

Consequently, I'm asking for your esteemed help in assisting me to perfect my opinions. If you know of any inoffensive opinion or opinions I might harbor, please point them out to me immediately. Time is of the essence here. I need to have all my ducks lined up before my cherished and adorable young nephews visit me again. After all, it just won't due if I lose my spot in their hearts as their most insufferable uncle.

Unless a person is a snowflake, why would they find anyone's opinion to be offensive? I think you ought to try for being insulting. Although people who take offense at insults are only slightly more grounded than snowflakes, you'll have a better chance at getting a reply, which is why, I assume, you're trying to be offensive.

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