Polygamy and Polyandry - You decide

[Gaura Priya]

Now let me get this straight:

We can all marry whoever we want and as many partners as we want. This means for example our third wife could have another husband. If this is the case then what is the point of marriage?

I don't believe that marriage was ever a one-sided thing. Marriage meant different things in many different cultures. That is why I said that in the West, we could just place a limitation to about four spouses maximum in one party. We already have polyamorous groups; why not have polygamy as well?

Why not all just stay single and have multiple partners if we can get them.

People already do that.

What about the one man one woman idea?

People do that too.

Could we even have same sex polygamy?

Why not?

surely it would be just easier to do away with marriage altogether.

That, or just control and regulate marriage parties.

Also what may work in the tribal regions in a foreign continent does not mean it is appropriate in America or Western Europe - or perhaps I am wrong?

Enlighten me.

Enlightenment comes from God. Reason comes from man. Reasoning takes alot of introspection, knowledge, and proper discrimination.

 

[Gaura Priya]

Are there any types of marriages you think should be banned then?

Abusive ones.

 

[nnmartin]

abusive ones - ok, but we can only know this afterwards.

If a man has 4 wives how can he possibly provide for them all if they do not have jobs?

How about a woman with 4 husbands - does she get half of all their salaries?

Won't this just lead to the man or woman with the most money having the most wives/husbands?

Best not to get me started on same sex polygamy as I'll probably get banned!

 

[Gaura Priya]

abusive ones - ok, but we can only know this afterwards.

If a man has 4 wives how can he possibly provide for them all if they do not have jobs?

Women can work too. What is this, the 1950's? XD

How about a woman with 4 husbands - does she get half of all their salaries?

Let them deal with the financial distribution. Unless you yourself are personally entering into this kind of relationship, I think it's silly that you're thinking about something that you would never enter into.

Won't this just lead to the man or woman with the most money having the most wives/husbands?

Not necessarily. Being a man or a woman, or with lots of money does not equate love. There are already polyamorous egalitarian relationships out there.

Best not to get me started on same sex polygamy as I'll probably get banned!

If you can't provide a reasoning with some background source, who knows?

 

[nnmartin]

Not necessarily. Being a man or a woman, or with lots of money does not equate love. There are already polyamorous egalitarian relationships out there.

Not in an idealistic fantasy world perhaps but in reality it does.

If a man is busy with number 1 and 2 wife do you really think number 3 would be interested in him if he had no money left for her?

Can you really see a man looking upon his wife in the same loving way if she had just spent the last week altering between Tom, Dick and Harry and now had a tuesday night to give him?

In reality there is little difference between these scenarios and legalised prostitution.

 

[turk179]

Best not to get me started on same sex polygamy as I'll probably get banned!

Lets talk about same sex polygamy

Just kidding.

 

[nnmartin]

Lets talk about same sex polygamy

Just kidding.

I am happy to talk about anything.

Unfortunately many here cannot tolerate views too different from their own.

Could we even have same sex polygamy?

Why not?

That really is depraved.

But let's throw incest in as well shall we.

Why not - everyone should be able to get married - right?

 

[Badran]

In reality there is little difference between these scenarios and legalised prostitution.

Actually, i fail to see any similarities. You're making lots of assumptions in order to say this. Assumptions such as (any, many or all of the following):

- A person can only truly love one person.

- People in that scenario will marry anyone they think is hot.

- People are actually incapable of accepting the concept of multiple partners, and thus, the whole relationship has gotta be cheapened in some way in their eyes.

- People base their decisions to marry on material things only (or mostly), including money. And so, the more money you have, naturally the more husbands and wives you will have (which again helps you cheapen the scenario in your eyes).

- Of course, it goes without saying, that people in these kinds of relationships will be irresponsible people who lack the dedication to form a serious commitment (and so the whole point of 'marriage' and 'family' is lost).

 

[gnosticx]

i personally know of a relationship of two men,1 woman....the big problem they have had has been with the in laws..... the whole thing started due to the senior members sexual fetish and in todays society they are frowned upon... if he or the other man walks hand in hand with the girl ok..the two men together ok but if all three walk holding hands they get those looks....and noone can say that their one of those because theyre probably far and few between...so if society was so fashioned then polygamy would be ok but there arnt enough single woman today....im in australia where its wall to wall blokes..

 

[rusra02]

So is there really anything wrong with Polygamy or Polyandry?

Anybody feel like getting the debate rolling?

Can we allow any marriage within the realms of decency as long as the adults are consenting?

I do have some views on these issues and am keen to share them so after you my good ladies and gentlemen....:drool:

Polygamy is contrary to God's purpose and forbidden to Christians. (Matthew 19:4,5)
Even though permitted by God for a time, God's original purpose was for monogamy. God regulated polygamy to protect women. (Exodus 21:10,11)
God's Son restored the original edenic standard of one husband, one wife. Therefore, polygamy or polyandry is a violation of God's law and constitutes adultery. While men may accept such practices that suit their desire for sexual gratification, the Bible warns that "God will judge fornicators and adulterers." (Hebrew 13:4)

 

[nnmartin]

People are actually incapable of accepting the concept of multiple partners...

So would you be perfectly fine if your girlfriend/wife shared you with 5 other men and you did not have the option of 5 women?

Would you be happy for your 1 night/day of the week to come along and have your turn?

I suspect that most men would happily have several wives but if the tables were to be reversed there would be quite the outcry.

 

[nnmartin]

Polygamy is contrary to God's purpose and forbidden to Christians. (Matthew 19:4,5)
Even though permitted by God for a time, God's original purpose was for monogamy. God regulated polygamy to protect women. (Exodus 21:10,11)
God's Son restored the original edenic standard of one husband, one wife. Therefore, polygamy or polyandry is a violation of God's law and constitutes adultery. While men may accept such practices that suit their desire for sexual gratification, the Bible warns that "God will judge fornicators and adulterers." (Hebrew 13:4)

I couldn't have put it better myself!

Now, how would God view same-sex incestuous polygamy as advocated by some on this board?

 

[Badran]

So would you be perfectly fine if your girlfriend/wife shared you with 5 other men

My personal preferences and yours are not basis for saying whether or not 'people' as a whole would want something or not. I wouldn't be fine with that, but thats merely a personal preference. We know for a fact however, that some people are fine with that.

You presume though, that they actually aren't okay with it but are just trying to belief so or something like that. Since, in reality (according to your line of thought), we're actually incapable of doing so.

and you did not have the option of 5 women?

Why would i not have that option in this scenario?

Would you be happy for your 1 night/day of the week to come along and have your turn?

It doesn't actually have to work this way, but assuming i was personally fine with the idea of having multiple partners or being one of them, i would naturally accept this.

I suspect that most men would happily have several wives but if the tables were to be reversed there would be quite the outcry.

I actually agree with you here.

 

[blackout]

As long as all relational options are open for/to everyone involved,
and everyone involved is in agreement with all relational agreements.
(whatever they may be, in accordance with each unique family unit)

 

[blackout]

As long as all relational options are open for/to everyone involved,
and everyone involved is in agreement with all relational agreements.
(whatever they may be, in accordance with each unique family unit)

As well, all decisions of sexual intimacy are to be made by the married members,
and NOT by any enforced/dictated/mandated government or religious law.
(unless a household CHOOSES to be religious, and follow said religious law/s.)

Who is sleeping with who is absolutely none of the govt's. business anyway.

 

[Draka]

abusive ones - ok, but we can only know this afterwards.

If a man has 4 wives how can he possibly provide for them all if they do not have jobs?

How about a woman with 4 husbands - does she get half of all their salaries?

Won't this just lead to the man or woman with the most money having the most wives/husbands?

Best not to get me started on same sex polygamy as I'll probably get banned!

Why are you so stuck on money? What is it about the fact that women can work and be breadwinners that you don't understand? Do you have such a low opinion of women that you think we are all lazy, uneducated, gold-digging leeches? This attitude of yours that men must support the women and women either make less or (ideally) don't work at all is getting a bit tiresome. It's like you really do believe a woman's place is barefoot and preggers in the kitchen while the "man" goes out and brings home the bacon for his little family. Is this how you really feel? Did you just step out of "Leave it to Beaver" or something?

 

[no-body]

So would you be perfectly fine if your girlfriend/wife shared you with 5 other men and you did not have the option of 5 women?

Would you be happy for your 1 night/day of the week to come along and have your turn?

I suspect that most men would happily have several wives but if the tables were to be reversed there would be quite the outcry.

I know it is difficult to accept the fact that you can be for something without being a part of it because you have such a controlling personality, but try. This is like people who denounce homosexuality by going into the mechanics of it and describing it as "yucky" I could make heterosexual sex or a heart operation sound yucky too if I described it in cold sterile detail.

For the thousandth time: people should be able to do whatever they want as long as it hurts no one else (and there is a caveat there on what hurt means)

Marrying a child or an animal is not the same thing because they are not fully developed mentally and cannot truly consent.

 

[Trey of Diamonds]

You forgot Polygyny and Polyamory.

I'm for Polyamory. Polygyny and Polyandry can be ok but sometimes, (most times maybe), represent a repressive society which is subverting one gender. I would only support them if they choosen by the participants of their own free will.

 

[Me Myself]

So would you be perfectly fine if your girlfriend/wife shared you with 5 other men and you did not have the option of 5 women?

Would you be happy for your 1 night/day of the week to come along and have your turn?

I suspect that most men would happily have several wives but if the tables were to be reversed there would be quite the outcry.

The whole idea of acepting it is that it is consensual. This means that this should be talked to before doing it.

If the man is okay with his wife having other men and he having no other woman, then they made a deal.

If the wife is okay with his man having other women and she having no other men, then they made a deal.

It´s simple, sonsensus is the most important part of it, and matureness too.

 

[Me Myself]

abusive ones - ok, but we can only know this afterwards.

If a man has 4 wives how can he possibly provide for them all if they do not have jobs?

Very easy. They get jobs.