Pornography and Ratings

[Draupadi]

I once came across a question posed by a woman who was feeling insecure by her husband's love of pornography. She said that she had just delivered a baby and was not in the mood and didn't have the looks (according to her) to please her husband. As a result her husband has resorted to porn. In the replies she was told that it was just a harmless thing and that she should give more time to her husband. One lady even didn't have any problem with her five year old kid watching it! I mean come on, it is one thing to fail to give attention to your husband and another to accept him watching porn. If I were her husband I would give her time to recover because it is a stage of life where many women experience such thing. Otherwise I would be insensitive. I am not saying that the woman should deprive her husband of her love, but why calling porn harmless?

The next thing I want to talk about is ratings of movies, advertisements, etc. How convenient it is to prevent access of immodest and violent stuff for kids and suddenly open it up when they grow up? I am not equating adults with kids, but don't you think today's content ratings are too liberal even for an adult? If censor boards allow the passing of the aforementioned contents so freely, then why will the filmmakers and the likes will make good stuff?

 

[Gjallarhorn]

Why is the inclusion of violence of sexuality in a film not "good stuff" if done with proper context?

 

[Draupadi]

Those things are the realities of life and should be shown. But not in details. That is just my opinion.

 

[Gjallarhorn]

I agree that ratings are screwy, but in a different way. I don't see why people can see horrendous acts of violence at an R rating but watching consensual explicit sexual intercourse is NC-17.

 

[Sunstone]

I once came across a question posed by a woman who was feeling insecure by her husband's love of pornography. She said that she had just delivered a baby and was not in the mood and didn't have the looks (according to her) to please her husband. As a result her husband has resorted to porn. In the replies she was told that it was just a harmless thing and that she should give more time to her husband. One lady even didn't have any problem with her five year old kid watching it! I mean come on, it is one thing to fail to give attention to your husband and another to allow him to watch porn. If I were her husband I would give her time to recover because it is a stage of life where many women experience such thing. Otherwise I would be insensitive. I am not saying that the woman should deprive her husband of her love, but why calling porn harmless?

Some people abuse porn, most people don't. Personally, I think someone who behaves like the husband you mention probably has problems with being considerate, sensitive, compassionate, and so forth that are only brought out by porn, but are not actually caused by it.

The next thing I want to talk about is ratings of movies, advertisements, etc. How convenient it is to prevent access of immodest and violent stuff for kids and suddenly open it up when they grow up? I am not equating adults with kids, but don't you think today's content ratings are too liberal even for an adult? If censor boards allow the passing of the aforementioned contents so freely, then why will the filmmakers and the likes will make good stuff?

Actually, I think you are in denial of the fact that you really are equating adults with kids. If you view adults as people who need restrictions on sexual content in order to be good, moral people, then you are infantalizing them, regardless of whether you yourself recognize that you are doing that.

Mark Twain somewhere says something along these lines: Just because a steak is not suitable food for a toothless infant, does not mean that it's not suitable food for an adult.

 

[Wirey]

Speaking as someone who has watched an awful lot of porn, I can tell you, my hand is sore.

 

[Skwim]

it is one thing to fail to give attention to your husband and another to allow him to watch porn.

Allow him!?! Geez, what else does he need your permission for?

don't you think today's content ratings are too liberal even for an adult?

Nope. It's assumed that adults can think for themselves and have the right to do whatever they want as long as it's legal---permission from one's wife not withstanding.

If censor boards allow the passing of the aforementioned contents so freely, then why will the filmmakers and the likes will make good stuff?

In other words only the tame stuff is good; and anything with a PG-13, R, or NC-17 rating could never be. :thud:

 

[Draupadi]

Allow him!?! Geez, what else does he need your permission for?

What if the wife doesn't like him watching porn? If the husband wants to give it up to please his wife then there's nothing wrong. I am sorry I wrote that sentence. I actually meant accept it. Let me fix it.

By the way I am against pornography and detailed display of violence. Most of you here might disagree with me and I won't say I didn't expect it. I just opened this thread to know whether there are people out there who agrees with me.

But Skwim I feel violent video games even addles the brain of adults. I have heard a couple of cases where adults murder for silly reasons like not getting 50 bucks from the person to whom he had lent it.

 

[Wirey]

Against porn? Define what you think porn is. Is a picture of a naked lady porn?

 

[Nymphs]

What if the wife doesn't like him watching porn?

Then they should talk about it and the reasons behind why she doesn't like it and the reasons why he does. Perhaps they can come to some sort of a compromise instead of making it all-or-nothing landing square on the wifes side.

But Skwim I feel violent video games even addles the brain of adults. I have heard a couple of cases where adults murder for silly reasons like not getting 50 bucks from the person to whom he had lent it.

That has absolutely nothing to do with video games. Here is a link to get you started on that:

New Study, Video Games Not Tied to Violence in High-Risk Youth

 

[Skwim]

What if the wife doesn't like him watching porn? If the husband wants to give it up to please his wife then there's nothing wrong. I am sorry I wrote that sentence. I actually meant accept it. Let me fix it.

By the way I am against pornography and detailed display of violence. Most of you here might disagree with me and I won't say I didn't expect it. I just opened this thread to know whether there are people out there who agrees with me.

While I agree about the violence, I think porno is just fine. Why are you against it?

 

[Draupadi]

I just don't like it. I have watched it a few times and I prefer normal movies' love making scenes more. It is cleaner and today's porn industry is all about violent love making. They are even promoting rape videos . And when it comes to sexual matters I think I am a bit conservative. I think it is just me.

 

[Wirey]

Meh. Everyone has their thing. I watch porn featuring sheep covered in steel wool. I like it rough!

 

[Sunstone]

Meh. Everyone has their thing. I watch porn featuring sheep covered in steel wool. I like it rough!

Do you recall that old advertising jingle: It went something like this, "You'll look better in a sheep you wash in Woolite".

 

[Draupadi]

I have no sexual experiences but maybe I think sometimes I wouldn't mind it rough with my husband, even though I am conservative about these things . Naughty Draup *blush*!

 

[Brickjectivity]

A marriage requires respect between partners. If the guy is expressing disrespect for his wife with porn or using it to tick her off then he is to blame for problems that result. That is what this sounds like, but the thing about marriage is you never truly know what goes on between two people. What does she do to him? I don't know what the situation is. Is he unhappy? Is he undermining her position in front of her own children? Is she picking at him? Does she disrespect him, too? Do they have affairs? Are they poor or well off? Other people's relationships are never transparent.

 

[Draupadi]

Well the woman herself had admitted that due to delivery she had lost the mood to have sex. It is quite common. She even said that she was jittery because of post-partum depression. I personally think that the man should try to understand her more. She was feeling so distressed that asked an advice column instead of discussing it openly with her husband, which I think she should have done. She did this because she was feeling low and insecure about herself, that her so-called lost beauty and her lack of attention was the cause.

 

[Wirey]

Guys don't care about that stuff. Pulse, no beard, we're in.

 

[Brickjectivity]

Well the woman herself had admitted that due to delivery she had lost the mood to have sex. It is quite common. She even said that she was jittery because of post-partum depression. I personally think that the man should try to understand her more. She was feeling so distressed that asked an advice column instead of discussing it openly with her husband, which I think she should have done. She did this because she was feeling low and insecure about herself, that her so-called lost beauty and her lack of attention was the cause.

You are probably right about that. There are a lot of things we don't know, but he should try to understand his own wife. That I would agree with. She did just have a baby, and he doesn't need porn. Its not a need.

 

[Wirey]

If porn is a need then so is crack. Porn is a want.