"Real Housewives" star has new book that advocates marital rape

[DallasApple]

I don't think the buffoon was actually advocating rape, but rather aggressive role play. He just used a very poor choice of words, which granted were tacky and in poor taste. If she were genuinely abused, she wouldn't praise her husband and her sex life with him in her silly little book.

How do you know that?

Again many abused women defend their husbands and their marriages.

YES abused women DEFEND their husbands and their abuse..Its COMMON..They will viscioulsy defend their abusive husbands..That is a fact..

If she were genuinely abused, she wouldn't praise her husband and her sex life with him in her silly little book. [/Q

This shows your opinion has NO credibility...You know nothing about abuse..

 

[DallasApple]

I will not claim anything in certainty regarding this couple, because I don't know them personally.

Im going by their words and what they wrote ..Same as you .And you have certaintly made claims.Including she must "enjoy it"..

 

[MysticSang'ha]

As would I, if I knew for certain that Mrs. Gorga was being mistreated by her husband. But, making a statement in the context of how a man and woman function within their marriage and seemingly, by their own free will, is quite different than a man having this opinion and acting upon such whims, without care as to his wife's feelings.

Again, I'm curious as to the full context of Melissa's book and her thoughts on her marriage.

I think any person who cares would call the proper authorities if they suspected an abusive situation.

Unlike some, I cannot label a man a rapist, based solely upon a few snippets of a book.

I admire your objectivity. Perhaps I'm a bit jaded with hearing some of the advice given in the book and seeing parallels with stories of women who suffered marital rape.

I think the advice is abhorrent. It turns my stomach. But if it turns out to be skewed and Mrs. Gorga and her husband are playing caricatures not just on the tv screen but in published works, too, for the purpose of getting money....I'd have to say well played. They know what sells.

Still.

I wanna puke. Know what I'm saying?

 

[dawny0826]

How do you know that?

Again many abused women defend their husbands and their marriages.

YES abused women DEFEND their husbands and their abuse..Its COMMON..They will viscioulsy defend their abusive husbands..That is a fact..

This shows your opinion has NO credibility...You know nothing about abuse..

His opinion on what really goes on in their marriage is no more credible than yours, Dallas. We're both aware as to the psychology of abused women, FH more than you realize.

The difference is that he and I aren't claiming with certainty that we know what's going on with this couple. You are.

 

[dawny0826]

I admire your objectivity. Perhaps I'm a bit jaded with hearing some of the advice given in the book and seeing parallels with stories of women who suffered marital rape.

I think the advice is abhorrent. It turns my stomach. But if it turns out to be skewed and Mrs. Gorga and her husband are playing caricatures not just on the tv screen but in published works, too, for the purpose of getting money....I'd have to say well played. They know what sells.

Still.

I wanna puke. Know what I'm saying?

It's hard for me to listen to the woman speak. I absolutely know what you're saying.

 

[Father Heathen]

How do you know that?

Again many abused women defend their husbands and their marriages.

YES abused women DEFEND their husbands and their abuse..Its COMMON..They will viscioulsy defend their abusive husbands..That is a fact..

This shows your opinion has NO credibility...You know nothing about abuse..

So we're to make presumptions based on some mouth-breather's babble, and then rush in as white knights to rescue those who are not even willing to rescue themselves?

 

[dawny0826]

Im going by their words and what they wrote ..Same as you .And you have certaintly made claims.Including she must "enjoy it"..

I did. But, I've stated repeatedly since, that I don't have insight into their lives and can't claim with any type of certainty as to whether or not this woman is genuinely happy or not.

You have labeled her husband a rapist and have claimed that she is an abused woman. As I've said, be my guest. I just can't relate to the kind of confidence that you have - feeling that you can, with certainy place such labels on people.

I don't think the Gorgas project as the most intelligent people. I find it excruciating to listen to them speak. I won't watch the show because I find it excruciating. But, I only know what I'm fed and I have a hard time accepting everything at face value. Regardless, I wouldn't want for either one of them to be mistreated in the auspices of their marriage. But, I dont' know them. And I'm not quite trusting of people who exploit their personal lives...for money.

 

[DallasApple]

His opinion on what really goes on in their marriage is no more credible than yours, Dallas. We're both aware as to the psychology of abused women, FH more than you realize.

The difference is that he and I aren't claiming with certainty that we know what's going on with this couple. You are.

Excuse me? Both of you saying "she obviously enjoys it" and saying she wouldn't be writing a book if it was abuse etc..shows how LITTLE you know about abuse..

If i FH more aware than I realize? Then he needs to go back to 101 in abuse..I red flagged yours and his statements in zero flat..YOU are wrong in your statements about how an abused person may act PERIOD.

You and FH made final statements in general about abuse go re read your posts/ that I can prove false.

I will not take back my opinion on what is happening in Mellissa's marriage though..

 

[DallasApple]

So we're to make presumptions based on some mouth-breather's babble, and then rush in as white knights to rescue those who are not even willing to rescue themselves?

No ..YOU aren't supposed to make false statements about what an abuse victim will or will not do and state it as fact.

 

[dawny0826]

Excuse me? Both of you saying "she obviously enjoys it" and saying she wouldn't be writing a book if it was abuse etc..shows how LITTLE you know about abuse..

If i FH more aware than I realize? Then he needs to go back to 101 in abuse..I red flagged yours and his statements in zero flat..YOU are wrong in your statements about how an abused person may act PERIOD.

You and FH made final statements in general about abuse go re read your posts/ that I can prove false.

I will not take back my opinion on what is happening in Mellissa's marriage though..

I have stated repeatedly, that I do not know with any certainty what's going on in their household, Dallas.

Further, you are not the authority on abuse, even if you have first hand experience. You can't project your experiences and perceptions onto others.

I haven't asked you to retract your opinions. But, I will stand firm on my own statement - that there's arrogance to claiming knowledge about the mental and emotional health of a person, without insight into their personal lives. Unless you are qualified to evaluate Melissa in a professional capacity, you can save your assessments.

 

[DallasApple]

If she were genuinely abused, she wouldn't praise her husband and her sex life with him in her silly little book.

You said this..like its a fact..

NO ..genuinely abused wives praise their husbands and in public..

They go to means to protect them too...

If you don't get that then why do you speak on the subject?

 

[Father Heathen]

If it were genuinely rape, why would he publicly incriminate himself in such a manner? Most people who are guilty of heinous crimes usually attempt to be discreet about it in order to avoid legal repercussions.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

I think you're reading too much into this. I put up a fight when I'm asked to do the dishes, as is in, I complain about it. I'm not actually putting up my fists and violently objecting.

Sorry, I think it's unfair to label someone a rapist without concrete evidence. I think that we've all been given enough to form opinions about their characters and to perhaps question their actions. But, I find it quite arrogant to label a man a rapist, without any more than statements, that have been purposefully examined on a website by someone who is of a particular opinion.

I'm sorry you are comparing this to washing the dishes? If someone is putting up a fight because they don't want to have sex with you, then you accept that they don't want to have sex, you don't try to "win"

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

If it were genuinely rape, why would he publicly incriminate himself in such a manner? Most people who are guilty of heinous crimes usually attempt to be discreet about it in order to avoid legal repercussions.

Maybe because he doesn't see himself as a rapist

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

And he knows his wife will not press charges against him.

 

[DallasApple]

[urther, you are not the authority on abuse,/QUOTE]

'Im an authority when someone is mis stateting FACTS..Such as a woman would never praise her husband if she was abused..

Im not even going to bother to quote the rest..Im an authority when lies /myths are being spread which help perpetuate abuse..And some of the stuff you and FH said flies in the face of truth.

Maybe you didn't realize it and I suspect so..I hope you get educated and learn..I mean no offense..I like to learn too.

 

[dawny0826]

I'm sorry you are comparing this to washing the dishes? If someone is putting up a fight because they don't want to have sex with you, then you accept that they don't want to have sex, you don't try to "win"

I think you missed the point I was attempting to make. Putting up a fight, isn't always a literal objection. My husband can relate to this with me.

 

[Father Heathen]

No ..YOU aren't supposed to make false statements about what an abuse victim will or will not do and state it as fact.

Surely victims aren't all as dumb, helpless, and self-destructive as you make them out to be? Is it a Stockholm syndrome epidemic? So once we make the presumption that someone is a victim, we must dismiss anything they say and do that may suggest otherwise?

 

[DallasApple]

If it were genuinely rape, why would he publicly incriminate himself in such a manner? Most people who are guilty of heinous crimes usually attempt to be discreet about it in order to avoid legal repercussions.

Because guess what..just like some others they don't consider it rape. even though it IS!

 

[dawny0826]

'Im an authority when someone is mis stateting FACTS..Such as a woman would never praise her husband if she was abused..

Im not even going to bother to quote the rest..Im an authority when lies /myths are being spread which help perpetuate abuse..And some of the stuff you and FH said flies in the face of truth.

Maybe you didn't realize it and I suspect so..I hope you get educated and learn..I mean no offense..I like to learn too.

Or perhaps she isn't being abused at all, Dallas, and her praising of Joe is legit? Have you ever considered that?

This is almost absurb. You're not an authority on the feelings, emotions and thoughts of other people.

I'm far more educated on the subject of abuse than I care to share with you. Abuse manifests in various forms and impacts people differently.