Vendetta
"Oscar the grouch"
Interesting enough, what motivated me behind writing this was while walking to the store, a Jehovah's witness who happened to be waiting for a friend, greeted me with a "good morning" and upon greeting her back, she hands me a pamphlet. The heading of the pamphlet read:
"HELLFIRE, IS IT APART OF DIVINE JUSTICE?"
To entertain my curiousity I read the pamphlet which was very interesting. Although the pamphlet acknowledges the possibility that teaching hellfire may have an adverse effect, it does not say whether the teaching of hellfire was wrong. Moreover this pamphlet caused a self-reflection within my own religious experiences and why I ultimately disbelieve.in the Abrahamic faiths.
From ages 12 to 28 now I grew up with a religious background and since I had a really good reading level as a child, I started reading theosophy and philosophy at 13. I soon developed a more systematic approach to understanding faith, starting with Christianity. Even though I grew up as a Baptist Christian baptized and all, I had developed a dislike for Christianity because I thought the trinitarian concepts were at odds with traditional monotheism and blah blah blah in addition, I personally find the various depictions kf Jesus on Christian walls.and Cathedrals to be.historically.inaccurate. So, I soon after leaving Christianity I began my curiousity in Islam when I was deployed in 2001 (for bvious reasons) and started.began taking an interest in Islamic Kalam, cosmology and philosophers, most specifically Averroes. Soon afterward I converted took Shahadah and became an active member of the community-prayed 5 times a day and all. However, like my experiences with Christianity I noticed differences. Not only.men and women were segragated but the mosque was also divided racially-Africans hung out with Africans, Pakistanis with Pakistanis and so on and so forth. Eventually the second thought turned into criticism and from criticism I decided to not practice.
With Judaism I didn't even want to try although I do have a fond for Maimonides and Spinoza.
After reading all the doctrines including supplimental texts such as gnostic scriptures, purchased the Talmud (transliteration) along with Hadith I realized that there is so much tremendous information on what to do, and how to behave. In reading all these text and learning God rewards and punishes his followers I soon developed a disdain for these faiths. I am like Keanu Reevs in the movie Constantine when he says "God is a kid with an ant farm."
I personally believe that in looking at all these faiths there is no desire I find in all these faiths and that feeling most sincere feeling. I am since then considering myself agnostic however I am still God-curious thanks in part to my religious background that left its residue on my soul.
"HELLFIRE, IS IT APART OF DIVINE JUSTICE?"
To entertain my curiousity I read the pamphlet which was very interesting. Although the pamphlet acknowledges the possibility that teaching hellfire may have an adverse effect, it does not say whether the teaching of hellfire was wrong. Moreover this pamphlet caused a self-reflection within my own religious experiences and why I ultimately disbelieve.in the Abrahamic faiths.
From ages 12 to 28 now I grew up with a religious background and since I had a really good reading level as a child, I started reading theosophy and philosophy at 13. I soon developed a more systematic approach to understanding faith, starting with Christianity. Even though I grew up as a Baptist Christian baptized and all, I had developed a dislike for Christianity because I thought the trinitarian concepts were at odds with traditional monotheism and blah blah blah in addition, I personally find the various depictions kf Jesus on Christian walls.and Cathedrals to be.historically.inaccurate. So, I soon after leaving Christianity I began my curiousity in Islam when I was deployed in 2001 (for bvious reasons) and started.began taking an interest in Islamic Kalam, cosmology and philosophers, most specifically Averroes. Soon afterward I converted took Shahadah and became an active member of the community-prayed 5 times a day and all. However, like my experiences with Christianity I noticed differences. Not only.men and women were segragated but the mosque was also divided racially-Africans hung out with Africans, Pakistanis with Pakistanis and so on and so forth. Eventually the second thought turned into criticism and from criticism I decided to not practice.
With Judaism I didn't even want to try although I do have a fond for Maimonides and Spinoza.
After reading all the doctrines including supplimental texts such as gnostic scriptures, purchased the Talmud (transliteration) along with Hadith I realized that there is so much tremendous information on what to do, and how to behave. In reading all these text and learning God rewards and punishes his followers I soon developed a disdain for these faiths. I am like Keanu Reevs in the movie Constantine when he says "God is a kid with an ant farm."
I personally believe that in looking at all these faiths there is no desire I find in all these faiths and that feeling most sincere feeling. I am since then considering myself agnostic however I am still God-curious thanks in part to my religious background that left its residue on my soul.