should I be an atheist or religious?

[Heyo]

say I believe the following: there are no beings responsible for creation, there are no omnipotent or omniscient beings, there are no supernatural powers or forces of any kind, there are no such thing as souls, and there is no afterlife.
but say I also: think that religious communities are in general a positive thing, pray daily, place God as the most important thing in my life, think that religious belief is most likely a positive thing, and think the stories I've read from the
Christian OT/Jewish Tanakh are true.
Do I have to be an atheist?
I think that it's a more "correct" lifestyle to be part of a religious community than to not; even if every member of the community doesn't agree on every single thing, I think it's beneficial for any people living together in one area to have a roughly shared set of values.
However, I'm not exactly going to just fake having religious belief and pick a religion to convert to, and I think perhaps a religious community wouldn't be the right fit for me anyway, as obviously I look at things considerably differently than (I assume) believers do.
What is the best solution? I'm trying to find the best path forward on what I guess you could refer to as my "spiritual journey" and I appreciate any input!

Hi and welcome to RF.

I'm a bit confused, or maybe you are?
You don't believe in a creator, supernatural powers, souls or an afterlife but you think that god is the most important thing in life?
That sounds either as a contradiction or a quite uncommon image of god.
Can you explain?

 

[lewisnotmiller]

say I believe the following: there are no beings responsible for creation, there are no omnipotent or omniscient beings, there are no supernatural powers or forces of any kind, there are no such thing as souls, and there is no afterlife.
but say I also: think that religious communities are in general a positive thing, pray daily, place God as the most important thing in my life, think that religious belief is most likely a positive thing, and think the stories I've read from the
Christian OT/Jewish Tanakh are true.
Do I have to be an atheist?
I think that it's a more "correct" lifestyle to be part of a religious community than to not; even if every member of the community doesn't agree on every single thing, I think it's beneficial for any people living together in one area to have a roughly shared set of values.
However, I'm not exactly going to just fake having religious belief and pick a religion to convert to, and I think perhaps a religious community wouldn't be the right fit for me anyway, as obviously I look at things considerably differently than (I assume) believers do.
What is the best solution? I'm trying to find the best path forward on what I guess you could refer to as my "spiritual journey" and I appreciate any input!

You can be an atheist and religious.
One is about belief, one about practices.

 

[Brickjectivity]

say I believe the following: there are no beings responsible for creation, there are no omnipotent or omniscient beings, there are no supernatural powers or forces of any kind, there are no such thing as souls, and there is no afterlife.
but say I also: think that religious communities are in general a positive thing, pray daily, place God as the most important thing in my life, think that religious belief is most likely a positive thing, and think the stories I've read from the
Christian OT/Jewish Tanakh are true.
Do I have to be an atheist?
I think that it's a more "correct" lifestyle to be part of a religious community than to not; even if every member of the community doesn't agree on every single thing, I think it's beneficial for any people living together in one area to have a roughly shared set of values.
However, I'm not exactly going to just fake having religious belief and pick a religion to convert to, and I think perhaps a religious community wouldn't be the right fit for me anyway, as obviously I look at things considerably differently than (I assume) believers do.
What is the best solution? I'm trying to find the best path forward on what I guess you could refer to as my "spiritual journey" and I appreciate any input!

You could try: Quaker, Unity, Universalist, and most Christian churches with a rainbow sticker on the door. You could visit a Reform synagogue and talk to the president or rabbi. Visit on a weekday, not a Friday. I guess...visit a Catholic priest and ask about your situation. Maybe they'll invite you to liturgy.

 

[Trailblazer]

thanks so much for your help! I'm actually really shy and more comfortable in small groups, too, but I think having a religious community would help me meet people. I have been researching different religions but found nothing yet that seems right. Though my family isn't religious, my grandma was raised Catholic until her family left the church when she was a child, so even though she doesn't know much about religion, our family was always culturally closest to Christianity, and so I've really considered whether a Christian denomination would be the right fit, especially Catholicism. However, they wouldn't be open to my lack of belief in God. I said in another comment "trying to believe in God feels like trying to unlearn that Santa doesn't exist" unfortunately. Because of the many shared Judeo-Christian values, I also considered Judaism, but I don't think you can really convert to Judaism? And I think it's also culturally quite different. I also place a lot of value in Sikhism, Taoism, and Buddhism, but those don't seem right for me as far as practice or community (not to mention there are none in my small town). I need to learn about more religions I can look into!

If you are looking for a religion that is close to Christianity in its spiritual teachings, but different from Christianity in its goals for individuals and society, and different in its religious practices, you might want to check out the Baha’i Faith. It is a very organized worldwide religion so there might be a Baha’i community in your area. The primary teaching is unity of mankind, that we are all one people, regardless of race, creed, or color or religion. We embrace all the major religions as part of the eternal religion of God but we believe that the Baha’i Faith, which was established in the 19th century, is the latest chapter of the revealed religions. The official website is The Bahá’í Faith - The website of the worldwide Bahá’í community

The downside for you might be that belief and faith in God is the basic underpinning to the religion, but like I said before I became a Baha’i before I had a real belief in God, because I was drawn to the teachings of the religion and I wanted to be part of something, a cause greater than myself. Only later in life did I come to realize who God was and how God is integral to the religion. I now have a firm belief in God because it makes sense to me that God exists, but I still struggle with faith in God, and question whether God is All-Loving, as Christians and Baha’is believe.

 

[Rival]

I was being a bit flippant with my language there, sorry, I know it is POSSIBLE to convert to Judaism, I've just had a bit of confusion about it, so thank you so much for your information! My exposure to Jewish conversion is that I have definitely heard of people converting, but only ever in the context of converting in preparation of marriage, so I wasn't sure how exactly conversion works or the "rules" surrounding it, as I have heard even Jews say that Judaism sort of discourages converts, as well as people saying that maybe only those descended from Abraham are actually part of the covenant and so only they could technically be Jewish? (Can you tell I don't know what I'm talking about, haha)
I'd love to hear anything you are willing to share about your experience, and I will also look up Noahidism for myself as I'm very interested to learn more about it.

Conversion is discouraged. Being Jewish takes a lot of effort; it involves using another language, observing new holidays with complex rituals, learning how to properly honour the Shabbat and on and on. As the nation of Israel is judged as a whole, if you mess up and don't fulfil all these obligations you drag the whole nation down; conversely, if you go above and beyond in your obligations, you just make everyone else look 10x worse. It's also as you've no need to convert as Noahidism is the path for those not under the Mosaic Covenant (Judaism).

 

[hkkb]

Hi and welcome to RF.

I'm a bit confused, or maybe you are?
You don't believe in a creator, supernatural powers, souls or an afterlife but you think that god is the most important thing in life?
That sounds either as a contradiction or a quite uncommon image of god.
Can you explain?

A quite uncommon image of God, I think, at least insofar as I've heard God described. I knew that was a rather confusing thing to say, sorry, but I thought it would be a bit too much to explain all this in the original post. So, roughly, my idea of God is fully and completely synonymous with the way, the tao, the path, the light, the (collective or not) unconscious, and also incorporates the "mother nature" aspect of the unknown ie the chaotic feminine creative element. So you can probably see my idea of God is not literal, I don't think of him as any kind of being or force, but as essentially a utilitarian personification of the way, the tao, the path, the light, the unconscious, and undoubtedly other things, which is not to say He is any less real than if He was a being. This personification is obviously highly influenced by Christianity, but my overall perception of God may not necessarily be as Christian as the representation, I think Christianity is just culturally the most accessible and thereby functional framework for me. However, I've already found "my" God to be extremely reduced in functionality without also having an understanding of the non-personified aspect of His nature, like the tao and the unconscious, so I would maintain my beliefs even if I practiced a set religion. In my brief research on a variety of world religions, I have found "my" God pretty much equally in Sikhism, Judaism, Catholicism, Taoism, and Buddhism, but I haven't researched terribly many or deeply yet.
I pray often. I talk to God daily (when I'm being diligent about my walk with Him, haha) and I get answers, in words. Every decision I make, I hope to be oriented to God, considering Him first and foremost, living for Him, praying that everything I do can be for His glory. Ultimately, the point of my life is God, He is my only meaning, and so I'm hoping to find a lifestyle or community that points me to God and encourages God to be the centre of my life daily, that emphasizes meaning and intentionality in all things because God is all things. I have adopted religious practices in my own home, but I feel I need a physical -or at least virtual- religious community as well, and I am willing to practice my beliefs in a different way (eg through specifically a Christian lens) within that religious community, so long as I don't have to lie about my own beliefs and practices, as I think it's of the utmost importance that people learn to compromise their individual thoughts and feelings in order to successfully and earnestly work together under a culture of larger shared values, and I think to do that in a local community is one of the most beneficial things a person can do. Unfortunately, people are not super open to my individual feeling that God does not precisely exist, haha

 

[hkkb]

If you don't believe in any gods, you are atheist. If you do believe in one or more gods, you're theist. That distinction doesn't really matter all that much on it's own, little different to whether you prefer tea or coffee or have light or dark hair. What you choose to do about it is what matters. That can involve religion, though it doesn't have to. There are religious atheists and non-religious theists of all different types for all sorts of different reasons. I personally think there is too much focus on religion and not enough on individual beliefs, opinions and, significantly, responsibilities.

Why would that have to be specifically religious though? And given you're excluding the existence of any kind of deities, what are you actually imagining it being religious changes?

I suspect lots of other people do exactly that (consciously or subconsciously) but I think it's a good thing you're choosing not to.

I think you need to work out what you actually want and need rather than what you think is the right way to be. You seem to be trying to base your journey on the paths other people have already trodden without any real consideration of where you're trying to get to. Sometimes you need to forge your own path, even though that can be more effort.

thanks for your help! the exact boundaries of atheism/theism and religious/irreligious have always been a bit murky to me (I assume they are used somewhat interchangeably due to the fact that self identified atheists are so often also irreligious) so I appreciate your input figuring out my label. Definitely an atheist in the literal sense, but I sure don't like that label for myself. You're absolutely right that the question I'm asking isn't about theism but about behaviour.
I have a pretty solid path with my own spirituality (I say pridefully, haha) and I don't tend to be able to change my beliefs without strategically employing cognitive dissonance against myself, so I don't aim to adopt anyone else's path. I myself have found far too MUCH emphasis on individual beliefs and opinions, though I agree as far as responsibilities. The goal is not to find religious beliefs, as I have those already, but to find a community and practices, and I haven't yet found a non-religious community that I feel emulates the benefits of a religious community as effectively. I would also like to have a community specifically around spiritual growth, but I acknowledge it's not necessary for the communities that fulfill social needs, spiritual needs, and form that "backbone of the community" type thing I'm describing to all be the same group! I'm looking for non-religious groups to join as well and I'd also love advice on that, but so far I've found that religious communities are the most effective at achieving the types of goals I'm aiming for

 

[hkkb]

You can be an atheist and religious.
One is about belief, one about practices.

thanks for your input! they are definitely different things, but it's seeming hard for me to find a community that is religious and also atheist! since my beliefs and practices don't clearly line up under a label or denomination obvious to me, do you have any thoughts on whether I should pick a community based on beliefs (begrudgingly atheist in the literal sense) or practices (religious worship)? or whether there is a community for both? Basically, I would become Catholic tomorrow if not for the fact that it looks like faith and belief are very important to Christians

 

[hkkb]

You could try: Quaker, Unity, Universalist, and most Christian churches with a rainbow sticker on the door. You could visit a Reform synagogue and talk to the president or rabbi. Visit on a weekday, not a Friday. I guess...visit a Catholic priest and ask about your situation. Maybe they'll invite you to liturgy.

thank you so much, I really appreciate it! I've heard of the first three but I guess a seeming sort of...lack of structure put me off? Or lack of like...doctrine? I'm not really sure, maybe it is the lack of that sort of unified belief in God and shared mythology, even if I mean something slightly different when I say God and I don't think the mythology is literal. I have checked out websites of some of the more liberal Christian churches I think you're describing, but felt kind of the same, not that "everyone welcome" is a bad thing just that maybe it feels less...religious-y, less God focused? I think I'm quite a traditional person and I'm worried I'd worried I'd be too conservative at a place like that, I like ritual and things. (disclaimer: if the rainbow stickers indicate they welcome all sexual orientations, I'm not trying to imply I'm too conservative in an anti-homosexuality stance or anything of the sort, I'm just dispositionally quite conservative, like verging on tradwife as far as lifestyle though not necessarily beliefs.) Thanks for the tip about the synagogue, my town is so middle-of-nowhere I'm not actually sure there's one nearby, but I've thought a lot about emailing or contacting somehow both a rabbi and a priest -since I felt pretty weird about walking into a religious building to be honest- to ask some questions, but I wasn't sure if it would be appropriate or how to get in contact with someone who wouldn't mind talking to me with my weird beliefs.

 

[hkkb]

If you are looking for a religion that is close to Christianity in its spiritual teachings, but different from Christianity in its goals for individuals and society, and different in its religious practices, you might want to check out the Baha’i Faith. It is a very organized worldwide religion so there might be a Baha’i community in your area. The primary teaching is unity of mankind, that we are all one people, regardless of race, creed, or color or religion. We embrace all the major religions as part of the eternal religion of God but we believe that the Baha’i Faith, which was established in the 19th century, is the latest chapter of the revealed religions. The official website is The Bahá’í Faith - The website of the worldwide Bahá’í community

The downside for you might be that belief and faith in God is the basic underpinning to the religion, but like I said before I became a Baha’i before I had a real belief in God, because I was drawn to the teachings of the religion and I wanted to be part of something, a cause greater than myself. Only later in life did I come to realize who God was and how God is integral to the religion. I now have a firm belief in God because it makes sense to me that God exists, but I still struggle with faith in God, and question whether God is All-Loving, as Christians and Baha’is believe.

thanks so much for your help, I'll definitely do some research! I'm totally okay with a religion that is all about God, so long as they are okay with someone joining who doesn't believe in a literal God

 

[Heyo]

A quite uncommon image of God, I think, at least insofar as I've heard God described. I knew that was a rather confusing thing to say, sorry, but I thought it would be a bit too much to explain all this in the original post. So, roughly, my idea of God is fully and completely synonymous with the way, the tao, the path, the light, the (collective or not) unconscious, and also incorporates the "mother nature" aspect of the unknown ie the chaotic feminine creative element. So you can probably see my idea of God is not literal, I don't think of him as any kind of being or force, but as essentially a utilitarian personification of the way, the tao, the path, the light, the unconscious, and undoubtedly other things, which is not to say He is any less real than if He was a being. This personification is obviously highly influenced by Christianity, but my overall perception of God may not necessarily be as Christian as the representation, I think Christianity is just culturally the most accessible and thereby functional framework for me. However, I've already found "my" God to be extremely reduced in functionality without also having an understanding of the non-personified aspect of His nature, like the tao and the unconscious, so I would maintain my beliefs even if I practiced a set religion. In my brief research on a variety of world religions, I have found "my" God pretty much equally in Sikhism, Judaism, Catholicism, Taoism, and Buddhism, but I haven't researched terribly many or deeply yet.
I pray often. I talk to God daily (when I'm being diligent about my walk with Him, haha) and I get answers, in words. Every decision I make, I hope to be oriented to God, considering Him first and foremost, living for Him, praying that everything I do can be for His glory. Ultimately, the point of my life is God, He is my only meaning, and so I'm hoping to find a lifestyle or community that points me to God and encourages God to be the centre of my life daily, that emphasizes meaning and intentionality in all things because God is all things. I have adopted religious practices in my own home, but I feel I need a physical -or at least virtual- religious community as well, and I am willing to practice my beliefs in a different way (eg through specifically a Christian lens) within that religious community, so long as I don't have to lie about my own beliefs and practices, as I think it's of the utmost importance that people learn to compromise their individual thoughts and feelings in order to successfully and earnestly work together under a culture of larger shared values, and I think to do that in a local community is one of the most beneficial things a person can do. Unfortunately, people are not super open to my individual feeling that God does not precisely exist, haha

That clears up a lot of things. There are indeed denominations where you'd fit in but it is unlikely to find a practising community in the west. Daoists are similar enough, there might be a denomination in Hinduism (but you'd have to talk with @Aupmanyav about that). Buddhists, even atheistic Buddhists are not really a fit.
Your best bet is to find a very open Christian church, UU, Episcopalian, or maybe Lutheran. I was born into a Lutheran family and stayed until about 20 for social reasons. I didn't hide my atheism and until I was asked to leave, there was no problem. I liked the community and the community liked me. (It was an order from higher up to make the youth work more "Christian" and less social.)
Last but not least you may want to look into Neo Paganism (not exactly Wicca but in that vein.) There is no tradition nor dogma and every coven has its own religious views. They usually are fond of rituals and community and there is a higher chance to have one nearby than with Daoists or Hinduists.

 

[Trailblazer]

thanks so much for your help, I'll definitely do some research! I'm totally okay with a religion that is all about God, so long as they are okay with someone joining who doesn't believe in a literal God

By literal God, do you mean a God that literally exists?

 

[hkkb]

Conversion is discouraged. Being Jewish takes a lot of effort; it involves using another language, observing new holidays with complex rituals, learning how to properly honour the Shabbat and on and on. As the nation of Israel is judged as a whole, if you mess up and don't fulfil all these obligations you drag the whole nation down; conversely, if you go above and beyond in your obligations, you just make everyone else look 10x worse. It's also as you've no need to convert as Noahidism is the path for those not under the Mosaic Covenant (Judaism).

yes, I'd definitely be more inclined to sort of practice Judaism without converting, which is what Noahidism sounds like? please correct me, sorry. You mention the amount of effort, and while I'm not put off by effort (putting in more effort actually speaks to the idea of sacrifice which I firmly believe in, as in sacrificing sin to God, sacrificing the present for the future, sacrificing free time for the pursuit of the holy) it's really made me consider whether Christianity would be a better fit for me culturally. Practicing an established religion that I really respect, like Judaism or Christianity, is not something I take lightly. I feel so confused, because I don't really believe in picking and choosing from religions (I mean philosophically I do, but I don't think it's functional for a community) but I don't know how to potentially pick one.
I feel like as a religion I'm most drawn to Judaism, as I place a high value on Judeo-Christian mythology but I've had trouble understanding the exact necessity of Jesus and the New Testament, and I also just really prefer my perception of the Jewish approach to religion. Laws over faith? However, as far as like...culture and practices, I'm most drawn to Catholicism, it feels like the right fit in terms of what religious worship should be, and I am open to the utility of Jesus. But I'm not sure what the community is really like in the Catholic Church, and the way I've seen some Protestants talk about their church communities is the way I think a community should be, even if I'm not totally sold on Protestantism. Meanwhile, I think Judeo-Christian religions need Taoism to really function optimally, and that a lot of Buddhism is highly beneficial and a big miss to lose out on, and Sikhism, on a scholarly level, looks like it might just have the cleanest, most functional, maybe even most correct version of the monotheistic religion, but I don't think Sikhism is the right fit for me either as far as culture and community.

 

[Rival]

yes, I'd definitely be more inclined to sort of practice Judaism without converting, which is what Noahidism sounds like? please correct me, sorry. You mention the amount of effort, and while I'm not put off by effort (putting in more effort actually speaks to the idea of sacrifice which I firmly believe in, as in sacrificing sin to God, sacrificing the present for the future, sacrificing free time for the pursuit of the holy) it's really made me consider whether Christianity would be a better fit for me culturally. Practicing an established religion that I really respect, like Judaism or Christianity, is not something I take lightly. I feel so confused, because I don't really believe in picking and choosing from religions (I mean philosophically I do, but I don't think it's functional for a community) but I don't know how to potentially pick one.
I feel like as a religion I'm most drawn to Judaism, as I place a high value on Judeo-Christian mythology but I've had trouble understanding the exact necessity of Jesus and the New Testament, and I also just really prefer my perception of the Jewish approach to religion. Laws over faith? However, as far as like...culture and practices, I'm most drawn to Catholicism, it feels like the right fit in terms of what religious worship should be, and I am open to the utility of Jesus. But I'm not sure what the community is really like in the Catholic Church, and the way I've seen some Protestants talk about their church communities is the way I think a community should be, even if I'm not totally sold on Protestantism. Meanwhile, I think Judeo-Christian religions need Taoism to really function optimally, and that a lot of Buddhism is highly beneficial and a big miss to lose out on, and Sikhism, on a scholarly level, looks like it might just have the cleanest, most functional, maybe even most correct version of the monotheistic religion, but I don't think Sikhism is the right fit for me either as far as culture and community.

If you like, you can send me a PM and ask me some questions as that would be easier. You'd just need to click on my name or avatar and select 'Star a Conversation.'

 

[hkkb]

That clears up a lot of things. There are indeed denominations where you'd fit in but it is unlikely to find a practising community in the west. Daoists are similar enough, there might be a denomination in Hinduism (but you'd have to talk with @Aupmanyav about that). Buddhists, even atheistic Buddhists are not really a fit.
Your best bet is to find a very open Christian church, UU, Episcopalian, or maybe Lutheran. I was born into a Lutheran family and stayed until about 20 for social reasons. I didn't hide my atheism and until I was asked to leave, there was no problem. I liked the community and the community liked me. (It was an order from higher up to make the youth work more "Christian" and less social.)
Last but not least you may want to look into Neo Paganism (not exactly Wicca but in that vein.) There is no tradition nor dogma and every coven has its own religious views. They usually are fond of rituals and community and there is a higher chance to have one nearby than with Daoists or Hinduists.

Thank you so much, I really appreciate all this, it's super helpful. I mentioned in another comment I had a satanism phase as a teenager, and so perhaps predictably I also had a wiccan phase. unlike satanism, I never fully identified as wiccan, but it was sort of my gateway to serious witchcraft and witchcraft remains probably the cornerstone of my religious practice at home now, perhaps second in importance only to shamanism. I've definitely considered the idea of Neo Paganism but I was skeptical of my ability to find like-minded people and also to form the sort of community I'm seeking, because I have quite traditional values -bizarrely- when it comes to my lifestyle. It's always seemed like practicing my religion communally via Christianity and pursuing the more hippie aspects of it in my own time was the most practical, if not for the fact I think most Christians wouldn't be open to me not believing the same way, but I'll definitely contact pastors in the area and see what they think if that would be appropriate?

 

[hkkb]

By literal God, do you mean a God that literally exists?

It's sort of hard to explain, which I guess part of my conception of God is "that which cannot be explained". By a literal God, I guess what I'm talking about is a God that is a being or a force or exists somehow physically or consciously in the universe. I have a conception of God because I believe it's functional to do so, and because I think it would be silly to say that God isn't real when billions of people across different cultures since the dawn of civilization have been not only talking about the same thing but basing their lives around it, so God-the-concept is certainly real, maybe the most real thing there is. To me, God is -very roughly- the personification of the tao, the way, the path, the light, the unconscious (collective and not), the unknown, the yin and yang together, and also includes concepts like mother nature.

 

[Trailblazer]

It's sort of hard to explain, which I guess part of my conception of God is "that which cannot be explained". By a literal God, I guess what I'm talking about is a God that is a being or a force or exists somehow physically or consciously in the universe. I have a conception of God because I believe it's functional to do so, and because I think it would be silly to say that God isn't real when billions of people across different cultures since the dawn of civilization have been not only talking about the same thing but basing their lives around it, so God-the-concept is certainly real, maybe the most real thing there is. To me, God is -very roughly- the personification of the tao, the way, the path, the light, the unconscious (collective and not), the unknown, the yin and yang together, and also includes concepts like mother nature.

Baha'is believe that God is a personal God, but also "that which cannot be explained" because God transcends all human limitations and forms, and is obviously beyond any human comprehension.

Below is an excerpt from the website God in the Bahá'í Faith.
If you want the full description, you can click on the link below.

While the Bahá'í writings teach of a personal god who is a being with a personality (including the capacity to reason and to feel love), they clearly state that this does not imply a human or physical form.[2]Shoghi Effendi writes:

What is meant by personal God is a God Who is conscious of His creation, Who has a Mind, a Will, a Purpose, and not, as many scientists and materialists believe, an unconscious and determined force operating in the universe. Such conception of the Divine Being, as the Supreme and ever present Reality in the world, is not anthropomorphic, for it transcends all human limitations and forms, and does by no means attempt to define the essence of Divinity which is obviously beyond any human comprehension. To say that God is a personal Reality does not mean that He has a physical form, or does in any way resemble a human being. To entertain such belief would be sheer blasphemy.[17][18]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/God in the Baha'i Faith​

 

[hkkb]

Baha'is believe that God is a personal God, but also "that which cannot be explained" because God transcends all human limitations and forms, and is obviously beyond any human comprehension.

Below is an excerpt from the website God in the Bahá'í Faith.
If you want the full description, you can click on the link below.

While the Bahá'í writings teach of a personal god who is a being with a personality (including the capacity to reason and to feel love), they clearly state that this does not imply a human or physical form.[2]Shoghi Effendi writes:

What is meant by personal God is a God Who is conscious of His creation, Who has a Mind, a Will, a Purpose, and not, as many scientists and materialists believe, an unconscious and determined force operating in the universe. Such conception of the Divine Being, as the Supreme and ever present Reality in the world, is not anthropomorphic, for it transcends all human limitations and forms, and does by no means attempt to define the essence of Divinity which is obviously beyond any human comprehension. To say that God is a personal Reality does not mean that He has a physical form, or does in any way resemble a human being. To entertain such belief would be sheer blasphemy.[17][18]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/God in the Baha'i Faith​

I love that idea of God! So my literal idea of God-the-concept is still a bit different, but it sounds like you didn't necessarily believe in God at first either; are Baha'is open to people joining even if they don't feel that belief deep down, or is that sort of "faith" just something that isn't really talked about to the degree that it's necessary to say outright you believe God is conscious?

 

[Trailblazer]

I love that idea of God! So my literal idea of God-the-concept is still a bit different, but it sounds like you didn't necessarily believe in God at first either; are Baha'is open to people joining even if they don't feel that belief deep down, or is that sort of "faith" just something that isn't really talked about to the degree that it's necessary to say outright you believe God is conscious?

First of all, I do not think you are an atheist, because atheists do not believe in a God or Gods, so maybe you are an agnostic because you are not sure if there is a God. All Baha'is I know believe in God, but it is not as if the Baha'is are going to interrogate anyone and ask them if they believe in God, at least not before they sign the card declaring their belief. The card says that you believe that Baha'u'llah was a Manifestation of God, what I normally refer to as a Messenger of God. When I signed the card I that implied a belief in God, because obviously there cannot be a "Messenger of God" unless there is a God; yet it is strange that I never thought much about God when I joined. I just assumed there must be a God. I did say the prayers but I had no feelings for God back then. I still don't have feelings for God, but at least I know more about who I am praying to, now that I know more about God. The way I know about God is from what Baha'u'llah wrote about God, but that is a longer story, if you want to hear it.

 

[Milton Platt]

say I believe the following: there are no beings responsible for creation, there are no omnipotent or omniscient beings, there are no supernatural powers or forces of any kind, there are no such thing as souls, and there is no afterlife.
but say I also: think that religious communities are in general a positive thing, pray daily, place God as the most important thing in my life, think that religious belief is most likely a positive thing, and think the stories I've read from the
Christian OT/Jewish Tanakh are true.
Do I have to be an atheist?
I think that it's a more "correct" lifestyle to be part of a religious community than to not; even if every member of the community doesn't agree on every single thing, I think it's beneficial for any people living together in one area to have a roughly shared set of values.
However, I'm not exactly going to just fake having religious belief and pick a religion to convert to, and I think perhaps a religious community wouldn't be the right fit for me anyway, as obviously I look at things considerably differently than (I assume) believers do.
What is the best solution? I'm trying to find the best path forward on what I guess you could refer to as my "spiritual journey" and I appreciate any input!

You are an atheist if you do not believe in any gods. You are a theist if you do believe there is one or more gods. Everything else is something else.