Snide remarks

[Electra]

So, I have had people talk poo about me a bit, hasn't happened much in person lately as I have been more confident, a big example was just over a year ago, a group of dudes threw money coins at me and laughed.
In the past I have just frozen and let it upset me, but today..
someone was walking past me and as we were passing each other he said 'hut' (rhymes with) and i turned and said '**** you' which is progress! And I do not feel upset about it
Next time I will try and stop the person and be like 'excuse me?' and put them in there place in a more mature way, it is so hard in the moment it catches you of guard. Like what a cowardly thing to do to someone, my mind can't even fathom.

Have you had anything like this happen to you? how do you respond?

 

[YmirGF]

So, I have had people talk poo about me a bit, hasn't happened much at all lately as I have been more confident, a big example was just over a year ago, a group of dudes threw money coins at me and laughed.
In the past I have just frozen and let it upset me, but today..
someone was walking past me and as we were passing each other he said 'hut' (rhymes with) and i turned and said '**** you' which is progress!
Next time I will try and stop the person and be like 'excuse me?' and put them in there place in a more mature way, it is so hard in the moment it catches you of guard. Like what a cowardly thing to do to someone, my mind can't even fathom.

Have you had anything like this happen to you? how do you respond?

It takes a lot of effort and wit to come up with good instantaneous comebacks, especially when emotions are in play (ie. anger). It is an art-form you simply have to hone. I have bitten with some pretty scintillating retorts over the years, but most of my very best lines come later on. What you do is tuck the brilliant quote in the back of your mind and hope it comes to the foreground when you need it. It's very much hit and miss. If you don't think there will be a violent response, you could try something benign like, "Are you gay, child?" as a response. Maybe look into conceal and carry laws where you live first, LOL.

 

[sun rise]

There are babies in adult bodies that enjoy flinging verbal poo at other people, especially immature boys doing so to women. I really don't have advice about how to respond outside of not letting it show if they're getting to you.

 

[SomeRandom]

So, I have had people talk poo about me a bit, hasn't happened much in person lately as I have been more confident, a big example was just over a year ago, a group of dudes threw money coins at me and laughed.
In the past I have just frozen and let it upset me, but today..
someone was walking past me and as we were passing each other he said 'hut' (rhymes with) and i turned and said '**** you' which is progress! And I do not feel upset about it
Next time I will try and stop the person and be like 'excuse me?' and put them in there place in a more mature way, it is so hard in the moment it catches you of guard. Like what a cowardly thing to do to someone, my mind can't even fathom.

Have you had anything like this happen to you? how do you respond?

Working in retail my learned response is "have a nice day." Seems to **** people off lol

 

[Kemosloby]

Tut? gut, nut

 

[Revoltingest]

Tut? gut, nut

Something much better.
Tis odd how something wonderful can be treated as insulting.
So I'll refer to someone as....
"C*** sucker....but in a bad way!"

Anyway, if one is called a "s**t", & eschews responding in a mature way,
a possibly good option is to confuse'm with a foreign insult.
I've used (phonetically) "Yop' teh byah".
To be insulted & left with that deer-in-the-headlights look is good.

Caution:
I don't have good judgement.
View my advice with a jaundiced eye.

 

[Tmac]

So, I have had people talk poo about me a bit, hasn't happened much in person lately as I have been more confident, a big example was just over a year ago, a group of dudes threw money coins at me and laughed.
In the past I have just frozen and let it upset me, but today..
someone was walking past me and as we were passing each other he said 'hut' (rhymes with) and i turned and said '**** you' which is progress! And I do not feel upset about it
Next time I will try and stop the person and be like 'excuse me?' and put them in there place in a more mature way, it is so hard in the moment it catches you of guard. Like what a cowardly thing to do to someone, my mind can't even fathom.

Have you had anything like this happen to you? how do you respond?

You must want to stand out in some way as most of the people I see try not to make eye contact.

 

[Wirey]

I have been accused of being pretty good with a comeback. My general reply is "What? It's hard to understand you with all the noise from your Mom sucking my dick!" and go from there.

 

[Revoltingest]

I have been accused of being pretty good with a comeback. My general reply is "What? It's hard to understand you with all the noise from your Mom sucking my dick!" and go from there.

A friend (a fellow jerk) was once in a meeting at work.
He was being annoying (a true talent he had).
A guy said "Too bad your father didn't j*** off that nite.".
Initially, my friend didn't get it.
Later in the meeting, he burst out laughing.

Btw, there's a great Seinfeld episode wherein George Costanza
keeps trying to employ a great come-back. He fails, of course.

 

[Electra]

. It is an art-form you simply have to hone. .

love this, 'art-form' - everything is art isn't it.

 

[Rival]

I just walk on by and let G-d deal with them. They obviously hurt inside more than they could hurt me.

 

[Wirey]

love this, 'art-form' - everything is art isn't it.

Only if you're good at it.

 

[It Aint Necessarily So]

there's a great Seinfeld episode wherein George Costanza
keeps trying to employ a great come-back. He fails, of course.

 

[Revoltingest]

Alternate scene....

 

[It Aint Necessarily So]

love this, 'art-form' - everything is art isn't it.

Oh, yes, insulting is an art.

First, you'll need the vocabulary. Here's a good start:

Spoiler

bafflegab - confusing or generally unintelligible jargon, gobbledegoop

barathrum - insatiable glutton, person who eats to excess

barlichood - state of being ill-tempered from intoxication

batie-bummil - A useless bungler

beau-nasty - slovenly fop; one finely dressed, but dirty..

blatherskite –person who babbles about inane matters. Nonsense; foolish talk.

blowmaunger – a person so fat that his cheeks puff out

breedbate – a troublemaker looking for an argument or a fight

brimborian - useless or valueless object.

cachinnator – one who laughs loudly, excessively or for no reason

clarty-paps – a dirty, slovenly wife

clatterfart – chattering woman

clodhopper – clumsy, awkward fellow

cockalorum – a small, self-important little man

codswallop - nonsense, balderdash.

crambazzle - a worn-out, dissipated old man

crepehanger – a pessimistic killjoy, always warning, deflated, predicting failure. etc.

cumberground - worthless object or person that is just in the way

cumberworld – one so infirm, disfigured or lazy as to be a useless burden to society

dandilly – a vain, spoiled woman

dandisprat - insignificant person

draffsack – a major glutton and his huge belly

dunderwhelp – a detestable numbskull

flibbertigibbet - chattering or flighty, light-headed person.

flingdust - harlot

furfuraceous – covered in dandruff

gabamouche – a gullible person

gaberlunzie - a beggar

gammerstang – a tall, skinny, awkward woman

gandermooner – a man who chases women during the month after his wife gave birth

gilly-gaupus - awkward person, foolish or silly person.

gobemouche – a gullible person

godwottery - nonsense, balderdash.

gongoozler – a dimwit who stares at unusual things; literally, one who watches boats

gubbertush – a bucktoothed person

gundygut – an offensive, mannerless eater

guttersnipe - a child who spends most of his time in the streets especially in slum areas

hobbledehoy – clumsy, awkward, adolescent boy.

hoddypeak - a blockhead or fool.

hogminny – a depraved young woman

hogrubber – yokel

jackanapes - A conceited or impudent person. A mischievous child

jiggery-pokery - deceitful or dishonest manipulation

jobberknowle, jobbernowl – an obese, dim-witted person

knipperdollin – a fanatical idiot

lickspigot – a revolting parasite

lickspittle – fawning underling, toady

limberham – an obsequious, servile person

mammothrept – spoiled child, or child raise by a grandmother

merry andrew - clown: a person who amuses others by ridiculous behavior

mudsill - low-life

mumblecrust – a toothless old beggar

mundungus - any offal or refuse; later, a foul-smelling form of cheap tobacco.

muttonthumper – an incompetent

nancy boy – effeminate man

ninnyhammer - fool or simpleton

nosy parker – prying person or busybody

panjandrum - an important or self-important person

pecksniffian - hypocritically affecting high moral principles

plunderbund - a league of commercial, political, or financial interests that exploits the public

popinjay - person given to vain, pretentious displays and empty chatter

porknell - obese person, specifically appearing as fat as a pig.

quacksalver – charlatan doctor, quack

quakebuttock – coward

quibberdick – nasty quibbler

quidnunc - inquisitive and gossipy person; newsmonger

quockerwodger - a wooden toy or person that jerks its limbs when pulled by a string

raggamuffin – one dressed in ragged or tattered clothing, a tatterdemalion

ripesuck – one who is easily bribed

scapegrace – habitually unscrupulous person; scamp

scrimshanker – one accepting neither work nor responsibility

slotterhodge – a messy eater

slubberdegullion - A filthy, slobbering person

smellfungus - perpetual pessimist

sneckdraw – a sneak-thief who quietly enters houses

snivelard – someone who speaks through the nose; a nasal or whiny person

snollygoster – an unprincipled person, especially in politics

snoutband – one who constantly interrupts to contradict

swartwouter – a fleeing embezzler

tatterdemalion – ragamuffin. one dressed in ragged or tattered clothing

throttlebottom - purposeless incompetent in public office.

trugabelly – a short, dirty fellow assigned to menial tasks.

windlestraw - A person who is tall, thin and un-healthy looking

 

[leibowde84]

So, I have had people talk poo about me a bit, hasn't happened much in person lately as I have been more confident, a big example was just over a year ago, a group of dudes threw money coins at me and laughed.
In the past I have just frozen and let it upset me, but today..
someone was walking past me and as we were passing each other he said 'hut' (rhymes with) and i turned and said '**** you' which is progress! And I do not feel upset about it
Next time I will try and stop the person and be like 'excuse me?' and put them in there place in a more mature way, it is so hard in the moment it catches you of guard. Like what a cowardly thing to do to someone, my mind can't even fathom.

Have you had anything like this happen to you? how do you respond?

I think it's probably better to ignore it. They are trying to get a rise out of you. Don't let them win. Just let it go and move on with your day.

 

[Kemosloby]

Something much better.
Tis odd how something wonderful can be treated as insulting.
So I'll refer to someone as....
"C*** sucker....but in a bad way!"

Anyway, if one is called a "s**t", & eschews responding in a mature way,
a possibly good option is to confuse'm with a foreign insult.
I've used (phonetically) "Yop' teh byah".
To be insulted & left with that deer-in-the-headlights look is good.

Caution:
I don't have good judgement.
View my advice with a jaundiced eye.

Yeah best response to S**t is "not with you", Why else would he say something except he's thinking about what he ain't getting, so it would be poking him in a sore spot and he'll spend the rest of the day thinking about what he ain't getting.

 

[Revoltingest]

Yeah best response to S**t is "not with you", Why else would he say something except he's thinking about what he ain't getting, so it would be poking him in a sore spot and he'll spend the rest of the day thinking about what he ain't getting.

The theme is good, but I imagine a response somehow more tailored for the offender.

 

[Wirey]

The theme is good, but I imagine a response somehow more tailored for the offender.

I'm thinking "You're the load the pig that squeezed you out of her diseased cooze should have spat in the toilet and pour Draino on, you inbred short dicked ****-faced *** clown. I banged your Grandma, and she smelled like shame! 120 million sperm cells in a squirt and you were the ****ing champ? Your father should be punching his own balls!" and then find the groove and get nasty.

 

[Revoltingest]

I'm thinking "You're the load the pig that squeezed you out of her diseased cooze should have spat in the toilet and pour Draino on, you inbred short dicked ****-faced *** clown. I banged your Grandma, and she smelled like shame! 120 million sperm cells in a squirt and you were the ****ing champ? Your father should be punching his own balls!" and then find the groove and get nasty.

Long long ago...in a university far far away, I worked at Waterman Gym.
A fellow worker (Jim) was a very athletic guy (working on a physics PhD).
One day, he was working the cage (handing out equipment & towels).
Some jerk took offense at him for some unknown reason, & called Jim a
"towel jockey who cared only about his body."
Jim had the presence of mind to respond calmly....
"Obviously you don't."

He later ran SDI under Reagan.