So... men... beat this!

[Kerr]

I am so tough my last breakfast was only spikes and a bowl.

 

[The Sum of Awe]

Have fun pooping that out

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm so tough I don't eat hundreds and thousands...I eat trillions and billions.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm so tough, mum doesn't tuck me into bed...she staples me in.

 

[Revoltingest]

I'm so tough that I can walk barefoot on carpeting with low pile!

 

[Wirey]

I masturbate to Guns and Ammo.

 

[Erebus]

I'm so tough I read Of Mice and Men and only cried a little bit.

 

[Alt Thinker]

I don't shave. I hammer the whiskers inside and bite them off.

 

[Wirey]

I can make women pregnant by yelling their names.

 

[Revoltingest]

I'm so tough that I drink maple syrup neat!

 

[dantech]

I am so tough my last breakfast was only spikes and a bowl.

You know, if you trust your anus, you can swallow a whole watermelon.

 

[dantech]

I'm so tough, I have a grizzly bear carpet in my room. The bear isn't dead. It's just afraid to move.

 

[Revoltingest]

I'm so tough that I can watch TV with a malfunctioning remote!

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm so tough I use Chuck Norris' toothbrush to clean my toilet.

 

[Revoltingest]

I use Chuck Norris' beard to clean me toilet.
(Whaddaya think is in me hand?)

 

[Alt Thinker]

On a hot summer day, there is nothing so refreshing as an ice cold glass of gravy.

In the winter, nothing beats a piping hot cup of mayonnaise.

 

[Revoltingest]

That is the grossest thing yet today!
(And I've been smelling alien genitals.)

 

[Alt Thinker]

That is the grossest thing yet today!
(And I've been smelling alien genitals.)

And commodes.

 

[Revoltingest]

Hmmm....I've detected dog breath here.
Have you been drinking from the wrong "bowl" again?

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm so tough, I cut the crusts off my toast...after I've eaten it.