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So we're no longer 'friends'

Renji

Well-Known Member
I am sad that you are upset, Renji. But we need experiences such as this to help us to appreciate real friendship when it comes along. I hope that you feel better very soon. :)
Yeah, there are a lot of 'true friends' out there for sure. :)
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
Yeah, this is kinda vent out thread. Earlier, I opened my facebook and I've seen my christian friends, and former churchmates unfriended me 'because I am an atheist'. One even PMed me telling me that she prays for me that I am able to get out of the 'dark room' and that I will not be consumed by my 'negative emotion'. Our head pastor even PMed me and told me "so this is the answer for the confusions that you have? Being an atheist?", as if atheism is some sort of religious movement that you get 'converted' into. This is actually a thing that the church where I am from does everytime a member 'backslides' from them, for the reason I do not know. It kinda hurt me because these people are my friends back in college and they forget all about it just because I am no longer a 'believer'. Oh well, who needs facebook anyway? :p


Dude, these probably weren't your friends to begin with. Count this as growth, not loss. We got your back.
 

StarryNightshade

Spiritually confused Jew
Premium Member
Like others have said, if that's how they are going to treat you, they were never your "friends" to begin with.

It sucks, but you will move on to better things and people.
 

suncowiam

Well-Known Member
One of my core philosophies is just be who you are openly. Be who you want to be. Be honest. Be true. Don't pretend.

Once I started living life this way, the things that most interested me started gravitating to me more easily and readily.

It quickly filtered my social environment between those that shared , tolerated, and disagreed with my beliefs.

Having people openly disagree with you or dislike you is not such a bad thing. There are billions of people in this world so you and your philosophies are not so alone as you think.
 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
Maybe you did something wrong? Try emailing them a picture of you naked. That should straighten things out. (Consult a doctor before taking my advice.)
 
'RF' is better than 'FB' I guess. :p

I see how many are saying they were not your true friends to begin with because they do not hang with you anymore, because of you going the atheist route.Well you have to take into consideration too that when one is a Christian they have devoted their lives to serving God and following the teachings of Christ.If you were once a Christian and then all of a sudden turn from God,you are saying to these friends that your thoughts and interpretations mean more than what God commands.So you have turned away from God and said publicly that you no longer believe.So you have said to everyone that in your heart you no longer wish to serve God.

The holy scriptures teaches to love everyone.Although, it also teaches that if one once believed in God, and turned away, teaching things other than what is taught by Christ,they are to be excommunicated and ignored.These were once brothers and chose to do the opposite.

It is the holy scriptures that says to do this.
1 Corinthians 5:11 But now I am writing you to stop keeping company with anyone called a brother who is sexually immoral or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man.12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church?…

Hebrews 12:11 True, no discipline seems for the present to be joyous, but it is painful; yet afterward, it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

If true christians ,they will still love you.They do not hate you I'm sure.That is why they are expressing themselves and trying to see what is the problem
 

Skwim

Veteran Member
Renji,

I think one of the dynamics at work here is that the integrity of your former belief is not inviolable, and this is a threat to the faith of your friends. That you, someone I assume they respect, could find fault with their beliefs means that doubt is an actual possibility, and they can't admit room for such a prospect. For some, holding on dearly to the comfort of religious belief is a number one priority, and to think such comfort could be abandoned for the logic of disbelief is too much to handle. They would prefer to ignore you than to have you around as a friend who reminds them of the vulnerability of their belief. So, it isn't you who they are pushing themselves away from, but the reminder you represent a possible fracture in their faith. It's sort of an "I can't hear you!" they're resorting to---out of sight out of mind. From my experience, few people of this sort seldom enter into a debate about the veracity of their faith, it's far too unsettling.
 
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Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber & Business Owner
It sucks when those people disown you because you aren't Christian anymore. When I was in high school, it didn't take long before people started telling me I was going to hell.
Oh well. We're better off without those types in our lives.
 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
It sucks when those people disown you because you aren't Christian anymore. When I was in high school, it didn't take long before people started telling me I was going to hell.
Oh well. We're better off without those types in our lives.
Damage control! I bet many of those people are embarrassed now about how they treated you.
 

Smart_Guy

...
Premium Member
Hey, sorry you had to go thru all this.

I would never unfriend my Facebook friends simply because of their beliefs.

Be optimistic. They only cut the chase and proven to you they were not real friends.

Here on RF we ARE your friends :)
 

Katzpur

Not your average Mormon
Yeah, this is kinda vent out thread. Earlier, I opened my facebook and I've seen my christian friends, and former churchmates unfriended me 'because I am an atheist'. One even PMed me telling me that she prays for me that I am able to get out of the 'dark room' and that I will not be consumed by my 'negative emotion'. Our head pastor even PMed me and told me "so this is the answer for the confusions that you have? Being an atheist?", as if atheism is some sort of religious movement that you get 'converted' into. This is actually a thing that the church where I am from does everytime a member 'backslides' from them, for the reason I do not know. It kinda hurt me because these people are my friends back in college and they forget all about it just because I am no longer a 'believer'. Oh well, who needs facebook anyway? :p
I will always, always, always be your friend, Renji.
 

McBell

Unbound
Yeah, this is kinda vent out thread. Earlier, I opened my facebook and I've seen my christian friends, and former churchmates unfriended me 'because I am an atheist'. One even PMed me telling me that she prays for me that I am able to get out of the 'dark room' and that I will not be consumed by my 'negative emotion'. Our head pastor even PMed me and told me "so this is the answer for the confusions that you have? Being an atheist?", as if atheism is some sort of religious movement that you get 'converted' into. This is actually a thing that the church where I am from does everytime a member 'backslides' from them, for the reason I do not know. It kinda hurt me because these people are my friends back in college and they forget all about it just because I am no longer a 'believer'. Oh well, who needs facebook anyway? :p
Did you realize before or after this unfriending ceremony that you use to belong to such an elitist group?
 
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