Mark Dohle
Well-Known Member
The agitated retreatant who was ready to ‘SNAP!
(Written August 2015)
It was about a year and a half ago that a woman about my age wanted to talk with me. One important lesson I have learned when dealing with the public is that while there is a solidarity that links us, there are also unique depths that only God sees. She seemed calm when she came in and sat down. That is until she started to speak to me, and then it was non-stop for about 30 minutes. She went from one point to another in rapid succession, with no central subject matter. So I listened and tried to gather some of the threads that she was speaking about. As she talked I got the impression that she was suffering from overload.
She talked about being sick of listening to the speakers giving the retreat, sick of books, of tapes, just tired, tired, tired. She was moving in every which direction in her chair but the longer I listened, the calmer she became. Until finally she just ceased talking and looked at me in anticipation. Not sure what she wanted, but I only said one thing. “You know you don’t have to go to the talks”. She seemed surprised at that. So I continued: “You don’t have to read so many books, nor listen to tapes, etc. Just settle down while you are here, sit, walk, or do nothing at all, let things settle”. She smiled at me, thanked me, and left.
She came back two days later on a Friday morning; she had been a retreatant here for five days. She seemed calmer and thanked me for giving her permission to not attend the retreats but to just relax and pray without any other outside interference. I understood her agitation. When I get overloaded I tend to ‘mind-race’, jumping here and there when I speak, while thinking I am easy to follow. Many people, I am one of them, have outgoing personalities, but in fact need large amounts of time to recharge. This beautiful soul was one of those people.
When people can’t recharge, be by themselves, and just think, or walk, or write or pray; if they can’t find time, then they will stretch like a rubber band and one day, ‘SNAP!!!’ Each personality is unique, yet also the same in many ways. Knowing one's limitations is helpful. To know one's need to attend to the inner life is most important, and if one has faith, developing insight and understanding of one's faith and tradition is even more essential.
We live in a culture that seems to want us to run around all day, then at night watch lots of TV, or got out and build up more stress in forms of entertainment that can be mind-numbing Entertainment is good, but as a way of life, it is not helpful and only adds to one's problems.
We all need to take root, settle down from time to time and allow the Spirit to speak to us in very faint whispers. If not, well we can get caught up in a lifestyle that really takes us nowhere, ages us faster than we need to and plays havoc on aspects of our lives that are really much more important.-Br.MD
