I’m not sure about that. For instance, I’ve talked to people about things I disagreed with, but for which I knew there was a significant emotional attachment to something. I knew I could respond in at least a couple different ways, and disagree without saying something particular that might cause them harm: I was cognizant of this, and it would have been malicious to throw what I knew would upset them in their face.
One can “disagree” with trans issues without deadnaming and misgendering; there are neutral ways to go about this. But transphobes seem like they always choose the “in your face” version of disagreement: being sure to deadname and misgender at every opportunity.
It’s not polite disagreement in such cases, it becomes malicious.