The RF Beauty Pageant! Swimsuit Competition First!

[Revoltingest]

Nipples. Count 'em. I've just covered bikini AND talent. So what's the question?

Beautiful! Please tell us about yourself.

 

[Revoltingest]

Wipe out sexual objectivity!
Revoltingest just wants to look at scantily dressed hedgehogs, robots and badgers (like me ).
Shun the show.
And send a padded ambulance for Revolting.
Can Revolting be saved from his pervy manias?
Is there a medication for robot or hedgehog perversion?
God, but it's all so sad.........:sad4:

I am not just sexy ears and and a shiny nose! :no:
Badgers got rights.........
But, Revolting, if you give me first prize, you can wiggle me ears and snuffle me nose..... ok?

We still aren't finished with the swim suit phase, so it's too early to start in on
your comedy routine for the talent phase. Please have patience all...once all
the entrants have finished the first part, we'll be on to the talent portion.

 

[Brickjectivity]

And by the way, shouldn't the judges be the winners from previous contests? That seems like the best way to pick pageant judges. Of course they should but where's the fun in that?

Nevertheless lets see some entries from the judges to prove they deserve to be judges.

 

[Revoltingest]

And by the way, shouldn't the judges be the winners from previous contests? That seems like the best way to pick pageant judges. Of course they should but where's the fun in that?

Nevertheless lets see some entries from the judges to prove they deserve to be judges.

This is a dictatorship.
And where's your swim suit photo?

 

[oldbadger]

We still aren't finished with the swim suit phase, so it's too early to start in on your comedy routine for the talent phase. Please have patience all...once all the entrants have finished the first part, we'll be on to the talent portion.

Rubbish! I don't do a comedy routine! :no:
My talent routine is attaching tassels to various parts of my gorgeous body and doing a Burlesque 'twist-and twizzle' routine. :yes:

If you decide to award me the prize I could be prepared to give you a private performance, purely to fulfill your pursuit for artistic excellence, you understand.

 

[oldbadger]

This is a dictatorship.
And where's your swim suit photo?

Swimsuit photo..... are you having a laugh?
That member in a swim suit would plunge the membership into depths of trauma so deep that all the psychotherapists in the US couldn't put 'em back together again. :yes:

I will risk venturing away from RF rules to tell the truth, whole truth and nothing about the truth, that Bricks looks like a nine inch wall that's lost its pointing.... in a swimsuit. Yuk. :faint:

Just give the prize to me........ :yes:

 

[Revoltingest]

Swimsuit photo..... are you having a laugh?
That member in a swim suit would plunge the membership into depths of trauma so deep that all the psychotherapists in the US couldn't put 'em back together again. :yes:

I will risk venturing away from RF rules to tell the truth, whole truth and nothing about the truth, that Bricks looks like a nine inch wall that's lost its pointing.... in a swimsuit. Yuk. :faint:

Just give the prize to me........ :yes:

Now, now....let not let the drive to win lead you to disparaging others.
Take a deep breath...feel your humanity & empathy for others...& just smile.
You can let the tension out in the "Kiss & Cry" area later.

 

[oldbadger]

Now, now....let not let the drive to win lead you to disparaging others.
Take a deep breath...feel your humanity & empathy for others...& just smile.
You can let the tension out in the "Kiss & Cry" area later.

Huh........ so you're not prepared to hear about Mr Bee and Buttercup, Bricks' ugliness, Draka's Lithium Polymer battery problems etc?

I'm the contestant with natural beauty and good looks. All the rest are stuffed full of botox and body enhancements. Some of 'em are so full of silicon that if they fell over they'd never stop bouncing around. :yes:

You're also overlooking my charm and personal magnetism.

 

[Revoltingest]

You're also overlooking my charm and personal magnetism.

Our score cards are secret, & kept in the RF vault (guarded by ninjas, bikers,
professional assassins, & WWF divas) so you cannot know our judgements yet.

 

[Brickjectivity]

Swimsuit photo..... are you having a laugh?
That member in a swim suit would plunge the membership into depths of trauma so deep that all the psychotherapists in the US couldn't put 'em back together again. :yes:

I will risk venturing away from RF rules to tell the truth, whole truth and nothing about the truth, that Bricks looks like a nine inch wall that's lost its pointing.... in a swimsuit. Yuk. :faint:

Just give the prize to me........ :yes:

I am above swapping insults with a badger, for badgers have neither abs or absolutes. Everyone knows they are brutes that eat worms and grubs and crickets, so I need not invent insults. They have no sense of democracy, no libertarian virtue, no capitalism. Badgers get sick if you feed them bacon, and they hate butterflies, the number 4, and any kind of wire.

 

[BSM1]

I am above swapping insults with a badger, for badgers have neither abs or absolutes. Everyone knows they are brutes that eat worms and grubs and crickets, so I need not invent insults. They have no sense of democracy, no libertarian virtue, no capitalism. Badgers get sick if you feed them bacon, and they hate butterflies, the number 4, and any kind of wire.

And they have a propensity of naming their children with names that start with the letter J.

 

[Draka]

You know, my Centurion is willing to step on the badger should he become anymore tiresome. Just say the word. Sure, he may lose some points for badger squishing, but he's confident he will make it up in the talent and question rounds.

 

[oldbadger]

I am above swapping insults with a badger, for badgers have neither abs or absolutes. Everyone knows they are brutes that eat worms and grubs and crickets, so I need not invent insults. They have no sense of democracy, no libertarian virtue, no capitalism. Badgers get sick if you feed them bacon, and they hate butterflies, the number 4, and any kind of wire.

..... Rubbish........ Poppy-cackle.....!
The only things that Badgers don't like are swan shot, AAA shot, ugly dachshunds (uggghhh) and grey seals.

You obviously have no education, entirely ignorant of Brock scholarly consensus or any scientific ability.

.......... and worms...... tasty worm sammiches...... are what make our fur or soft, shiny and sexy.

 

[Revoltingest]

We have a tie!
Lunamoth & Dantech share a win of the swim suit competition.
Congrats to you both!

 

[oldbadger]

You know, my Centurion is willing to step on the badger should he become anymore tiresome. Just say the word. Sure, he may lose some points for badger squishing, but he's confident he will make it up in the talent and question rounds.

Ha ha..... can just imagine it now.

Draka (with voice of authority): Centurion! Attack! Squishy that nasty old-b.....b..... b...... ba... badger.
Centurion starts to move forward: Squeak, clank, grauch, clunk, squeak.....

...... 'cos I nicked your oil can! Ha ha....ha..... ha ha..... :yes:

 

[oldbadger]

We have a tie!
Lunamoth & Dantech share a win of the swim suit competition.
Congrats to you both!

Rigged! Corruption!
What did they offer you?
:sad4:

 

[Revoltingest]

Rigged! Corruption!
What did they offer you?
:sad4:

They gave a better presentation.
Much to my disappointment, there were no bribes.

 

[oldbadger]

..............

 

[Brickjectivity]

Here's a bribe: I'll be happy to offer my protection from falling bricks to those judges who show rationality and appreciation for fine masonry in their results.

 

[Alceste]

Ok, you talked me into it.

I unfortunately can't tell you much about myself due to the covert nature of my work. But I can tell you I have a lot of guns but I'm not too posh for a good old fashioned baseball bat. My hobbies are zoophilia and the study of banned psychotropic substances. I live in the outback in a very cozy, reinforced RV. Can't wait for the talent section of the competition!