By experience, the Aisha thing as you put it was always a proof for me on how some democratic callers are double standarded. It may not be the case with others, but heres why:
Most of the times when I discuss this issue, I explain that the 9 years old is a regional thing: in hot spots on the globe , ladies grow fast ; (just an example, I live in morocco (not very hot) and my cousin got her menses at 10 and if you see her you'll see a women ) and saudi arabia is the one of the hottest spot , so when the propht sallalahu 'alayhi wassalam married Aisha (ra) she was already a complete women. Yes she loved to play with dolls, and that is because she was still young and still loved to play. And everytime I tell them that if she did not like the situation , she could have ran away; but no, instead of that she was crazy about him. And when the prophet sallalahu 'alayhi wassalam wwas asked on the most beloved person to his heart , he said "Aisha (ra)".
So, you can see that they loved each other and in order to understand the nine years thing,you should put the story in its correct context. Scholars used to say that in Yemen they used to see 18 years old grandmothers ( married at 9 ,and her daughter too) it may be difficult for you to understand, but for me who live in a somehow hot country , it is very reasonable.
Now, the problem is , those so called freedom and democracy callers, and diversity ; they just cant swallow the fact that people are different from them, their bodies are different, their mindset too; which show a huge insincerity with their claims. And Allah knows best