What advice would you give someone who is starting their 30's?

[The Sum of Awe]

I'm almost 27 and just trying to see what you all would do differently around my age. I feel like I want to start going out more. The other night I went to a strip club and I actually got bored (none of the dancers I found attractive, that probably is the main reason). I don't know if I can afford traveling but I'd like to just have more "fun" in my life because most of my hobbies are solitude, chill, relaxed things. I want to taste a different flavor, see if I like it.

 

[RestlessSoul]

It doesn’t cost much money to travel when you’re young; not if you travel light and are willing to work wherever you go. Though when I was young, I hitched all over Europe, don’t think you can really do that anymore. It was a good way to meet people and learn languages too. I’d definitely recommend travelling anyway, it really does broaden the mind.

 

[Wirey]

Forget money. Family first. Be careful what you do with your pecker. Read everything, and then question it. Eat oatmeal. Tell the people you love that you love them, every single chance you get. There's not enough time, ever. Gilligan's Island never gets old.

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

By the time I was 27 I was ready to settle down. I had spent three years in the artillery mostly abroad. I had been to college and had lived and worked abroad. I had just met and married my late wife. And was starting a family.

What on earth have you been doing with your youth. 30 is the start of your maturity not the time to play about.
But all life should include fun and enjoyment, but there must time for direction and development for the future.
Life is a balance..

 

[JustGeorge]

At 17, I promised my cat I'd marry him if I wasn't married by 27. The summer I turned 26(my birthday is in September), I started picking out rings to fit a cat. In July, I met an obnoxious man that wouldn't stop badgering me. I married him shy of two weeks to 27. So, life changed a lot about that time.

For me, the 30s has been relatively awesome. The hormones start to calm a bit, and you can start reflecting what you want life to be like. The best advice I can give is question everything. See how much of what you do/say/think/'feel/enjoy is you, and how much is programmed from culture, friends, or upbringing.

Experience. That doesn't mean you have to go to Timbuktu, you can experience new things right where you are. Look around where you live. Get familiar with it. Investigate stores or restaurants you haven't been to. Check out any natural areas nearby. Get to know your landscape.

Learn to be okay with aging. No, you're far from old, but as I near 40, and my 'people' go through their 30s, I'm seeing those that are okay with aging and don't take it as a personal reflection, and don't try to cling madly to what once was end up relatively level, and those that do are constantly upset, wishing, pining for something now gone.

And of course, enjoy the ride.

 

[We Never Know]

I'm almost 27 and just trying to see what you all would do differently around my age. I feel like I want to start going out more. The other night I went to a strip club and I actually got bored (none of the dancers I found attractive, that probably is the main reason). I don't know if I can afford traveling but I'd like to just have more "fun" in my life because most of my hobbies are solitude, chill, relaxed things. I want to taste a different flavor, see if I like it.

Exploring nature isn't costly. Its also relaxing, educational and makes good memories.

 

[We Never Know]

At 17, I promised my cat I'd marry him if I wasn't married by 27. The summer I turned 26(my birthday is in September), I started picking out rings to fit a cat. In July, I met an obnoxious man that wouldn't stop badgering me. I married him shy of two weeks to 27. So, life changed a lot about that time.

For me, the 30s has been relatively awesome. The hormones start to calm a bit, and you can start reflecting what you want life to be like. The best advice I can give is question everything. See how much of what you do/say/think/'feel/enjoy is you, and how much is programmed from culture, friends, or upbringing.

Experience. That doesn't mean you have to go to Timbuktu, you can experience new things right where you are. Look around where you live. Get familiar with it. Investigate stores or restaurants you haven't been to. Check out any natural areas nearby. Get to know your landscape.

Learn to be okay with aging. No, you're far from old, but as I near 40, and my 'people' go through their 30s, I'm seeing those that are okay with aging and don't take it as a personal reflection, and don't try to cling madly to what once was end up relatively level, and those that do are constantly upset, wishing, pining for something now gone.

And of course, enjoy the ride.

Spoiler: Language

 

[JustGeorge]

View attachment 66807

Yup. Sounds about right.

 

[England my lionheart]

Grab the Bull by the horns I say but you can still have chill time,places like Australia and New Zealand are good for travelling,in New Zealand it’s called “woofing” working in the vineyards and apparently can be a lot of fun and meeting new people from all over the world.

I would also say challenge yourself,take yourself out of the comfort zone,wild camping solo or surfing and socialise more,this life is like “blink and you miss it” so don’t waste it imo.

 

[Secret Chief]

Get a good pension plan.

 

[Revoltingest]

I'm almost 27 and just trying to see what you all would do differently around my age. I feel like I want to start going out more. The other night I went to a strip club and I actually got bored (none of the dancers I found attractive, that probably is the main reason).b

In my early 20s, I went with some friends to
a titty bar. I discovered that unattractive gals
can sweat a lot.

Adding to @Wirey's advice....
1) Mistakes are easy to make....usually from doing
something quickly without due consideration.
Success hinges upon avoiding that.
2) Always keep the big picture in mind.
3) Whatever field you're in, get good at it.
4) Your employer is your client. Protect their interest.
5) Preserve your equanimity & you're health.
(Those 2 are closely related.)

 

[RestlessSoul]

Get a good pension plan.

Rarer than hen’s teeth these days

 

[Secret Chief]

Rarer than hen’s teeth these days

True. Although mine are a bit ****.

 

[The Sum of Awe]

By the time I was 27 I was ready to settle down. I had spent three years in the artillery mostly abroad. I had been to college and had lived and worked abroad. I had just met and married my late wife. And was starting a family.

What on earth have you been doing with your youth. 30 is the start of your maturity not the time to play about.
But all life should include fun and enjoyment, but there must time for direction and development for the future.
Life is a balance..

In my youth I spent the majority of my time discussing religion on the internet

 

[JustGeorge]

In my youth I spent the majority of my time discussing religion on the internet

Well, go discuss it with people in person!

You ever been to the Ryumonji Monastery?

 

[RestlessSoul]

True. Although mine are a bit ****.

You teeth, or your pension?

 

[Debater Slayer]

I'm almost 27 and just trying to see what you all would do differently around my age. I feel like I want to start going out more. The other night I went to a strip club and I actually got bored (none of the dancers I found attractive, that probably is the main reason). I don't know if I can afford traveling but I'd like to just have more "fun" in my life because most of my hobbies are solitude, chill, relaxed things. I want to taste a different flavor, see if I like it.

I'm only several months older than you, so the advice I'll post is what I tell myself now. It may or may not work for you; I hope it does, even if a little.

- Enjoy the time you can spend with your family (assuming your relationship with them is healthy). They are getting older, and you don't want to regret not spending time with them when you could.

- Emotional self-sufficiency is a must. There will be times when you can't rely on anyone else for emotional support. Learn to go out on your own and to enjoy your own company. That's totally fine. Friends come and go, even close ones; the only absolute constant in your life is yourself. Company definitely helps, but if need be, it's better to learn how to survive on your own now than later.

- A relationship isn't a substitute for the above. Get into a relationship because you want to, not because you feel a need. It won't replace emotional self-sufficiency, nor should it. Your emotional eggs belong in your own basket.

- Don't compare yourself to others; only to your own goals and what you want to achieve. There will always be someone better off or worse off. Don't let that render you discouraged or complacent. No two lives are identical; comparison is pointless unless it motivates you to do better and helps you.

- Take care of your health as much as you can. If the last two years have demonstrated anything, it's that your health-related decisions may have noticeable effects decades later. That body ain't changing; keep it in as good of a shape as you can now.

- Don't let your plans and career isolate you from family and friends. A successful career without a loving, caring social circle is soulless and lonely.

I remind myself of these things frequently nowadays. Some days are harder to stay motivated through than others, but things have been getting better in the last few years--slowly but surely.

 

[JustGeorge]

Since you're in Iowa and religion is an interest, here's some things you might enjoy investigating:

Welcome To Ryumonji (active in offering meditation sessions, check out schedule)

Home Page - HTCC (check out some pictures of this one; its amazing. Its in Madrid, Iowa)

Home - The Shrine of the Grotto of the Redemption | West Bend, Iowa
(worth seeing, even if your persuasion is not Christian. Excellent display of Bhakti)

Iowa City's Harvest Preserve and Sacred Stone Circle - Spiritual Travels (amazing something so ancient has been brought here to Iowa)

Giant Buddha Statue Unveiled in Iowa - Buddhistdoor Global (I've yet to see this one.)

Iowa Masonic Library and Museums (they've actually got some of A.E. Waite's stuff in here)

Shri Devi Mandir Fairfield Hours, Services - (I've yet to visit; I believe the whole city is founded on Ayurvedic principles)

 

[The Sum of Awe]

Well, go discuss it with people in person!

You ever been to the Ryumonji Monastery?

Hmm, I may some day check that out, looks interesting. Have you been there? What was your experience like?

But honestly I'm looking for... not really a total personality change, but just to party more, socialize more, just enjoy myself mindlessly. I went into the club the other night and found myself having a conversation about Stephen King with the stripper I spent most of the time with (hahaha I actually find that hilarious that I did that). But I'm not a complete bore like that, I do have a sense of humor, I'm just working on getting it out more in settings like that.

 

[JustGeorge]

Hmm, I may some day check that out, looks interesting. Have you been there? What was your experience like?

But honestly I'm looking for... not really a total personality change, but just to party more, socialize more, just enjoy myself mindlessly. I went into the club the other night and found myself having a conversation about Stephen King with the stripper I spent most of the time with (hahaha I actually find that hilarious that I did that). But I'm not a complete bore like that, I do have a sense of humor, I'm just working on getting it out more in settings like that.

I've been in; stopped by while traveling that corner of Iowa. No one was there but a large Buddha statue and a cat, though. They both seemed welcoming.

Well, there's certainly more strip clubs dotting Iowa, I'm sure, but I'm not going to hunt down links for all those.

If you're in small town Iowa, you're probably going to want to find some larger cities if its night life you're looking for.