Hmmmmm....“convert” I suppose would be an inaccurate term for where my quest has led me now, because while Traditional Stoicism has clearly discernible, if not already visible, religious aspects, it itself is not a religion but an ancient school of Greek philosophy.
I was always attracted to ancient cultures since I was 11 or 12. One to which I was especially drawn was that of Ancient Greece. I always suspected that they were quite the intellectual sort. My later desire to study philosophy proved this to be accurate, as when I had gone to college, my professor had tackled Ancient Greek philosophers such as Plato, Aristotle, Socrates, Pythagoras, and the Sophists. We did not have the time to study the Stoics then. Actually, it wasn’t until a few years later that I would have heard of Stoicism.
Fast forward those years, I do my searching for the answers to the questions which inform human existence within all sorts of religious teachings and schools (in vain). While I found various answers that satisfied me intellectually or spoke to the yearnings of my heart, I was never able to harmonize my thoughts and the feelings within my soul, especially regarding the Nature of God. I felt lost, empty, constantly seeking but never finding them. This manifested in my shameful hopping back and forth between different religions.
Speaking to the Nature of God, within the last year, I re-discovered through deep contemplation that God and the Universe are truly identical. This conception is what is called ‘Classical Pantheism’. This is the pantheism of the Stoic philosophers, as differentiated from the later pantheism of Spinoza and Einstein called ‘Scientific’ or ‘Naturalistic Pantheism’. Regarding the divergence of my heart and mind, I had felt torn between the monotheism I had imbibed from early youth and the polytheism which always had invited me to its consideration since my early days of exploring religion. After some discussion within myself, I came to the understanding that for me, there exists a single, Supreme God above many lesser deities. This conception is called ‘henotheism’. Eureka! I found a conception of the Divine that brings my inner being in accord! (Coincidentally, such was the same understanding espoused by the Ancient Greeks and Romans themselves).
Since discovering Traditional Stoicism, I find that the fullness of my understanding of God and the gods, human nature, and the purpose of human existence is presented with profound clarity. Plus, if I should be drawn towards the sincere worship of the (Greek) gods, then I do have a historical example in the person of Marcus Aurelius, so I’m at peace with my chosen path.
