What's it like being old?

[Spiderman]

So, we have some senior citizens at this forum. You are my heroes if you actually want to be alive and enjoy living.

People at this forum patronize me for wanting to die young. Seriously, how is dying young not a blessing? Who wants to do the heroic yet slow tedious martyrdom of old age?

In many ways, beauty vanishes quickly and so many crosses, complications, and afflictions come with old age. How is it not a good thing to never have to deal with such a slow, tedious crucifixion? It all ends in death one way or the other.

So, if you are a senior citizen, are you happy? Are there complications and suffering that have come with age? How so?

Anyway, I won't try suicide, the cowards way out, ever again, cos it just left a bunch of metal and screws in me and bad arthritis. Well, that arthritis is just going to get worse and worse, so if I'm lucky, Jesus will let me not live longer than he did. He was fortunate to go home at age 33. That sounds like a good age to return to sender, in my opinion.

If you are a senior citizen, my hat goes off to you with admiration, I just prefer not to go through it is all...I took care of a 91 year old Franciscan priest with Dementia. I had to spoon feed him, change his depends, and shower him. It was rewarding and his presence was a blessing in many ways, but I certainly never want to go through that.

Any thoughts?

 

[Spiderman]

This could be you or I some day:

I prefer dying looking like I do in my avatar. I guess that is selfish and perhaps cowardly, but it seems quite rational at the same time. If it is true that we can get greater unity with God, greater enlightenment, and greater peace and joy after death, in paradise, how is it not rational to want to get there soon?

 

[Spiderman]

So @Deidre,
What's it like being so old?

Spoiler

Just giving you a bad time. I know you aren't much older than me and you still have the beauty of an Angel. But I'm starting to feel like an old fart. Seriously, do you want to become an old lady? Well, if so, you will make a very cute old lady.

 

[Shushersbedamned]

Why you trigger me so much? everyday I come here and see these questions I don't want to think about...

 

[exchemist]

So, we have some senior citizens at this forum. You are my heroes if you actually want to be alive and enjoy living.

People at this forum patronize me for wanting to die young. Seriously, how is dying young not a blessing? Who wants to do the heroic yet slow tedious martyrdom of old age?

In many ways, beauty vanishes quickly and so many crosses, complications, and afflictions come with old age. How is it not a good thing to never have to deal with such a slow, tedious crucifixion? It all ends in death one way or the other.

So, if you are a senior citizen, are you happy? Are there complications and suffering that have come with age? How so?

Anyway, I won't try suicide, the cowards way out, ever again, cos it just left a bunch of metal and screws in me and bad arthritis. Well, that arthritis is just going to get worse and worse, so if I'm lucky, Jesus will let me not live longer than he did. He was fortunate to go home at age 33. That sounds like a good age to return to sender, in my opinion.

If you are a senior citizen, my hat goes off to you with admiration, I just prefer not to go through it is all...I took care of a 91 year old Franciscan priest with Dementia. I had to spoon feed him, change his depends, and shower him. It was rewarding and his presence was a blessing in many ways, but I certainly never want to go through that.

Any thoughts?

I think about it a lot, being 63 and seeing my 90 yr old wheelchair-bound father in his nursing home every Friday, and now that my own catalogue of ailments and physical limitations is building up. I don't relish the idea that much, but I feel sure that every day I will feel: "Well, it may not be great but it beats being dead." I suppose I hope that when the time comes I can reconcile myself along the lines of Orlando Gibbons' "The Silver Swan":
The silver Swan, who, living, had no Note,
when Death approached, unlocked her silent throat.
Leaning her breast upon the reedy shore,
thus sang her first and last, and sang no more:
"Farewell, all joys! O Death, come close mine eyes!
More Geese than Swans now live, more Fools than Wise."

The last line has a certain appeal already!

 

[Spiderman]

Why you trigger me so much? everyday I come here and see these questions I don't want to think about...

Hey, you will have the first degree of beauty and perfection in heaven.

This life is a brief journey. Your home is in the next

 

[Vouthon]

I'm nearly 26 and don't fear "getting old". I keep an optimistic attitude about it.

It's natural, and from time immemorial has been the norm for anything that breathes under the sun.

My grandmother - who is in her 80s - has the most wonderful attitude to life, a very youthful outlook. What I will always remember her for (well, in addition to the odd bottle of gin) is the saying, "I'll get old someday".

She has positively refused to allow herself to wallow in, and become obsessed with, the passing of the years. And why should she?

Life can be enjoyed at every stage, I think. Beauty should not be confined to the smooth, unlined skin of a 22 year old. It comes in many forms.

That said, the apprehension is perfectly legitimate in terms of things like dementia, loss of mobility and loneliness in old age. We need to take care of our elderly and senior citizens, in the hope that when we need it one day, the same support network will be there for us as well.

 

[Spiderman]

I'm nearly 26 and don't fear "getting old". I keep an optimistic attitude about it.

It's natural, and from time immemorial has been the norm for anything that breathes under the sun.

My grandmother - who is in her 80s - has the most wonderful attitude to life, a very youthful outlook. What I will always remember her for (well, in addition to a bottle of gin) is the saying, "I'll get old someday".

She has positively refused to allow herself to wallow in, and become obsessed with, the passing of the years. And why should she?

Life can be enjoyed at every stage, I think. Beauty should not be confined to the smooth, unlined skin of a 22 year old.

That said, the apprehension is perfectly legitimate in terms of things like dementia, loss of mobility and loneliness in old age. We need to take care of our elderly and senior citizens, in the hope that when we need it one day, the same support network will be there for us as well.

I have one word for how I want to be treated in old age:
Euthanasia

 

[ChristineM]

Im 48 and perhaps I'm over halfway there but don't really care. One thing that age teaches me is things. In know more than i knew 20 years ago and fully expect to know more in another 20 years

 

[Subduction Zone]

This could be you or I some day:
View attachment 22453

I prefer dying looking like I do in my avatar. I guess that is selfish and perhaps cowardly, but it seems quite rational at the same time. If it is true that we can get greater unity with God, greater enlightenment, and greater peace and joy after death, in paradise, how is it not rational to want to get there soon?

No way!! He is wearing a hat.

 

[Vouthon]

This could be you or I some day:
View attachment 22453

I prefer dying looking like I do in my avatar. I guess that is selfish and perhaps cowardly, but it seems quite rational at the same time. If it is true that we can get greater unity with God, greater enlightenment, and greater peace and joy after death, in paradise, how is it not rational to want to get there soon?

For all I know, he could enjoy a better quality of life than some young people from severely deprived backgrounds, or who are suffering from degenerative disease.

He may have a loving, attentive family or be a respected elder in his community, whom younger folks turn to for advice.

Perhaps, grave expression aside, he has a cracking sense of humour, enjoys a good drink down his local watering hole with old pals -fondly reminiscing about the past or discussing sports or current affairs - and has a zest for life.

I don't look at him and think, "ahhh, old guy, lined face, crows feet, I'm gonna have to hide in terror".

Keep your glass half full mate.

 

[ChristineM]

I'm nearly 26 and don't fear "getting old". I keep an optimistic attitude about it.

It's natural, and from time immemorial has been the norm for anything that breathes under the sun.

My grandmother - who is in her 80s - has the most wonderful attitude to life, a very youthful outlook. What I will always remember her for (well, in addition to the odd bottle of gin) is the saying, "I'll get old someday".

She has positively refused to allow herself to wallow in, and become obsessed with, the passing of the years. And why should she?

Life can be enjoyed at every stage, I think. Beauty should not be confined to the smooth, unlined skin of a 22 year old. It comes in many forms.

That said, the apprehension is perfectly legitimate in terms of things like dementia, loss of mobility and loneliness in old age. We need to take care of our elderly and senior citizens, in the hope that when we need it one day, the same support network will be there for us as well.

Jeanne Calment was a French woman who lived to 122, she put her long life down to eating a kilo of chocolate a week, treating her skin with olive oil, dranking port wine and riding a bicycle (until she was 100). She also appeared to be immune to stress, her outlook was 'If you can't do anything about it, don't worry about it.'

At age 110 she said " i only have one wrinkle and i'm sitting on it"

 

[Brickjectivity]

Im 48 and perhaps I'm over halfway there but don't really care. One thing that age teaches me is things. In know more than i knew 20 years ago and fully expect to know more in another 20 years

I think my mind is smaller but more efficient. My body keeps coming up with new complaints, and when my muscles don't hurt from exertion they actively shrink. Pain is the story of my future if any.

 

[Vinayaka]

Pope, which age are you referring to? Emotional, physical, intellectual, soul, willpower, or some other? I believe this thread is limited to physical chronological age. I've seen 15 year olds (chronologically) with the intellect of a 60 year and the emotional age of 80. I've also seen an 80 year ole (chronologically) with the will of an 80 year old but the emotional maturity of a 10 year old. There are people of many ages with the sex impulse of a raging 16 year old. When I taught, I knew several students who were smarter than me, and most certainly more emotionally mature than some of my teacher colleagues. Asking, 'Who is the adult here?" was a difficult question.

How many times do we just think, "My goodness, how old are you?" because the actions we perceive aren't matching our pre-conceived ideas of the behaviour we associate with that age?

Considering the single factor of number of revolutions of the sun we have been here physically doesn't do diversity of the human condition much justice.

 

[sun rise]

heroic yet slow tedious martyrdom of old age?

Perhaps I'm not old yet, being only 73, but I don't see my life as either heroic nor tedious nor exhibiting martyrdom. Rather my attitude toward getting old (age 90?), comes from the start of Robert Browning's poem Rabbi Ben Ezra:

Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
The last of life, for which the first was made:​

So, if you are a senior citizen, are you happy? Are there complications and suffering that have come with age? How so?

I'm adjudged 'senior', in some terms so my answer is yes, I'm happy. There are medical complications since my body is in worse shape than it was at age 20 or 40 or even 60, but fortunately the problems are minor. I spend hours every day volunteering, I'm taking TaiChi and other classes, on a diet to lose weight, going to the dog park with my wife and dog 6 days a week and so forth.

My father in law was making money in the stock market at age 90, something I've never been able to do, doing woodworking, going for walks etc until pancreatic cancer got him at age 92.

Dementia is a horrible disease and there are people who are crippled with other infirmities that can come with age. But for most of my friends, happiness is not a matter of the shape the body is in. joie de vivre, joy of living, of being alive, is wonderful.

 

[ChristineM]

I think my mind is smaller but more efficient. My body keeps coming up with new complaints, and when my muscles don't hurt from exertion they actively shrink. Pain is the story of my future if any.

C’est la vie. Only one answer, have a nice curry and a drink and enjoy what you have while you have it

 

[joe1776]

I'll be 83 next month. There's frustration at times because the body can't do what it used to do. But my attitude toward life has never been better. If you scan the threads I've started, you'll feel the optimism about the future of our species. I only wish I could hang around to see a whole a lot more of it.

Things that you take for granted give me great joy. I needed to replace an old washer and dryer. 40 years ago, that would have required an arduous shopping trip, going from store to store, and listening to sales pitches at each stop. I spent an hour online to make my pick and place the order. My new appliances were hooked up by 10 AM the next day. You'd laugh if you knew how much joy I get out of stuff like that.

My son recently flew to London to become part of a five-man crew of a 47-foot sailboat headed to Sweden from England. About 50 of his friends and family were able to go onto a website and follow the boat by GPS. We could tell from the boat's speed when it was going into the wind and when it wasn't.

We knew that one of their first stops was a port in the Netherlands. My daughter searched and found a webcam at the entrance to that port so that we could watch their arrival live. I took a screenshot and emailed it to my son five minutes after it happened. My daughter captured a video and had it up on Youtube before they left port.

Technology made it possible for our family to share that experience in a way that would never have been possible years ago. This is fun.

 

[Phantasman]

So, we have some senior citizens at this forum. You are my heroes if you actually want to be alive and enjoy living.

People at this forum patronize me for wanting to die young. Seriously, how is dying young not a blessing? Who wants to do the heroic yet slow tedious martyrdom of old age?

In many ways, beauty vanishes quickly and so many crosses, complications, and afflictions come with old age. How is it not a good thing to never have to deal with such a slow, tedious crucifixion? It all ends in death one way or the other.

So, if you are a senior citizen, are you happy? Are there complications and suffering that have come with age? How so?

Anyway, I won't try suicide, the cowards way out, ever again, cos it just left a bunch of metal and screws in me and bad arthritis. Well, that arthritis is just going to get worse and worse, so if I'm lucky, Jesus will let me not live longer than he did. He was fortunate to go home at age 33. That sounds like a good age to return to sender, in my opinion.

If you are a senior citizen, my hat goes off to you with admiration, I just prefer not to go through it is all...I took care of a 91 year old Franciscan priest with Dementia. I had to spoon feed him, change his depends, and shower him. It was rewarding and his presence was a blessing in many ways, but I certainly never want to go through that.

Any thoughts?

Does death equate to fear? For many yes. Even orthodox Christians I have talked to. You elect to feel about death by how you feel about life.

And I answered and said to him: "Lord, do not mention to us the cross and the death, for they are far from you."
The Lord answered and said: "Truly I say to you, none will be saved unless they believe in my cross. But those who have believed in my cross, theirs is the Kingdom of God. Therefore, become seekers for death, just as the dead who seek for life, for that which they seek is revealed to them. And what is there to concern them? When you turn yourselves towards death, it will make known to you election. In truth I say to you, none of those who are afraid of death will be saved. For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who have put themselves to death. Become better than I; make yourselves like the son of the Holy Spirit." -Secret Book of James

For true Christians, death is the beginning, not an end.

(18) The disciples said to Jesus, "Tell us how our end will be."
Jesus said, "Have you discovered, then, the beginning, that you look for the end? For where the beginning is, there will the end be. Blessed is he who will take his place in the beginning; he will know the end and will not experience death."- Gospel of Thomas

Even today, the orthodox church reforms the thought of death, and profits from it's ignorance. People pay in hopes the church is right.

You, my friend, are merely experiencing a half concocted view of what life is. Hoping that the unexpected (or unknown) has a better solution. This void in knowledge is good. It is more important to fill this void with a profitting view. Maybe soon, maybe never. May be why you are here at this time in your life.

Age has nothing to do with it. Even babes can utter wisdom.

My view. Take care.

 

[Sunstone]

"It takes life to love life."

I think our popular culture has suckered most of us into seeing old age as a curse with few, if any, important blessings. But during the span of years between when we get old, and when we lose a truly significant degree of our health, there is quite a bit to be said in favor of old age.

Two points about that: First, people now and then do indeed mention one or two of the benefits of old age. But then, they seldom talk about them in ways that come even vaguely close to how important they can be to older people. How on earth can "You will understand more" come even within the ballpark of expressing how important that will become to you?

More than that, people almost systematically overlook or neglect some benefits of old age, let alone emphasize how important they can be. For instance, the real opportunity you have to wisely and with insight give back to your community something of what your community gave to you earlier in life. Sure you can give back earlier in life. But not, I think, with anywhere near the same satisfaction. We change as we age -- that sort of thing becomes much more rewarding to us.

Second, I once read of a scientific study that found -- to put it crudely -- "If you are a whiner at 20, you'll be a whiner at 80." The fact is, some folks just love life more than others do. I suspect people who fear a healthy old age, or who dismiss the importance of any benefits to growing old, are usually whiners at heart. You could give them paradise and they'd be the first to tell you the ambrosia tasts "off" to them.

One of my favorite poems is "Lucinda Matlock" by the minor American poet, Edgar Lee Masters, whose widow was a friend of my mother's. Masters based the poem on his grandmother, who was a pioneer woman. If you don't want to read the whole thing, you can get the gist by reading the last five lines:

I went to the dances at Chandlerville,
And played snap-out at Winchester.
One time we changed partners,
Driving home in the moonlight of middle June,
And then I found Davis.
We were married and lived together for seventy years,
Enjoying, working, raising the twelve children,
Eight of whom we lost
Ere I had reached the age of sixty.
I spun, I wove, I kept the house, I nursed the sick,
I made the garden, and for holiday
Rambled over the fields where sang the larks,
And by Spoon River gathering many a shell,
And many a flower and medicinal weed —
Shouting to the wooded hills, singing to the green valleys.
At ninety-six I had lived enough, that is all,
And passed to a sweet repose.
What is this I hear of sorrow and weariness,
Anger, discontent and drooping hopes?
Degenerate sons and daughters,
Life is too strong for you —
It takes life to love Life.

 

[sun rise]

This could be you or I some day:
View attachment 22453
...

One more thought. My self image is not what the mirror shows me nor is it for others like me who are happy at "our age". This idea was captured by one of the wisest people I've ever known when she exclaimed "Oh lord, who is that old woman I see in the mirror? It certainly is not me." But, of course, I don't mind occasionally being mistaken for being 10-years younger than I am.