Why are Christians so sexually insecure?

[nnmartin]

seeming that Christianity developed from Paganism why are most Christians so hung up on the sex issue? Correct me if I"m wrong but I'm sure this isn't the case with Paganism.

For instance, pre-marital sex is NOT banned in Paganism, right?

I know you can interpret the Bible in many ways but the general consensus among most Christians is that Pre-marital and homosexuality is a big no no (even though Jesus certainly never directly mentions pre-marital).

This is a big turn-off (excuse the pun) to Christianity for me which is a shame as some of the philosophy is good.

Surely men and women were made with biological instincts so what's the problem with the Christians and what are they scared of?

 

[Badran]

***Mod post***

This thread has been moved to the General Religious Debates forum.​

 

[TheKnight]

seeming that Christianity developed from Paganism why are most Christians so hung up on the sex issue? Correct me if I"m wrong but I'm sure this isn't the case with Paganism.

For instance, pre-marital sex is NOT banned in Paganism, right?

I know you can interpret the Bible in many ways but the general consensus among most Christians is that Pre-marital and homosexuality is a big no no (even though Jesus certainly never directly mentions pre-marital).

This is a big turn-off (excuse the pun) to Christianity for me which is a shame as some of the philosophy is good.

Surely men and women were made with biological instincts so what's the problem with the Christians and what are they scared of?

I don't think it's fear so much as it is misplaced sincerity. Christians are, for the most part, sincere. Or at least they're trying to be. So a small misinterpretation can go a long way towards shaping how they behave.

 

[Shermana]

If that "Biological Instinct" were to be obeyed at all times, there'd be even more STDs than there is now, and there's a reason why there are so many STDs and unwanted pregnancies to begin with.

Also, there's an apparent natural instinct to want to destroy anyone who gets with your significant other (unless you have a thing for swing, which goes back to Point 1) If you disagree, go try to get with a biker's girlfriend and tell me how that works out.

And there's also the whole emotional issues that girls go through.

And paternity issues. Those are big.

And even with modern "technology" (The Pill has horrible side effects and so do abortions), protection doesn't stop things like Cervical cancer.

So all in all, it looks like marriage and faithfulness is the best strategy.

Statistically, relationships that begin with co-habitation are far more likely to break up earlier than not.

As for male-male relations, there's a reason why most men have a natural avoidance to it, and there's a reason why Intestinal Protozoa is so common among those who do it, and there's a reason their life spans are significantly shorter. And there's a reason why they have by far the highest STD rates such as accounting for over 60% of all syphillis (and it ain't from "lack of education). And Oral Cancer. http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/05/09/us-gay-men-cancer-idUSTRE7480GE20110509 http://health.usnews.com/health-new.../05/09/gay-men-more-likely-to-have-had-cancer And there's a reason why most guys don't want to have male friends who see them as meat.

Why not go one step further and say there's nothing wrong with pedos while you're at it.

 

[McBell]

If that "Biological Instinct" were to be obeyed at all times, there'd be even more STDs than there is now, and there's a reason why there are so many STDs and unwanted pregnancies to begin with.

Also, there's an apparent natural instinct to want to destroy anyone who gets with your significant other (unless you have a thing for swing, which goes back to Point 1) If you disagree, go try to get with a biker's girlfriend and tell me how that works out.

And there's also the whole emotional issues that girls go through.

And paternity issues. Those are big.

And even with modern "technology" (The Pill has horrible side effects and so do abortions), protection doesn't stop things like Cervical cancer.

So all in all, it looks like marriage and faithfulness is the best strategy.

Statistically, relationships that begin with co-habitation are far more likely to break up earlier than not.

As for male-male relations, there's a reason why most men have a natural avoidance to it, and there's a reason why Intestinal Protozoa is so common among those who do it, and there's a reason their life spans are significantly shorter. And there's a reason why they have by far the highest STD rates such as accounting for over 60% of all syphillis (and it ain't from "lack of education). And Oral Cancer. Are gay men more at risk for cancer? | Reuters Gay Men More Likely to Have Had Cancer - US News and World Report And there's a reason why most guys don't want to have male friends who see them as meat.

Why not go one step further and say there's nothing wrong with pedos while you're at it.

And to think that that is how God made us...

 

[SCHIZO]

seeming that Christianity developed from Paganism why are most Christians so hung up on the sex issue? Correct me if I"m wrong but I'm sure this isn't the case with Paganism.

For instance, pre-marital sex is NOT banned in Paganism, right?

I know you can interpret the Bible in many ways but the general consensus among most Christians is that Pre-marital and homosexuality is a big no no (even though Jesus certainly never directly mentions pre-marital).

This is a big turn-off (excuse the pun) to Christianity for me which is a shame as some of the philosophy is good.

Surely men and women were made with biological instincts so what's the problem with the Christians and what are they scared of?

Christianity developed from Judaism not paganism. It grew up with paganism surrounding it.

What's wrong with being responsible with your sexuality? I don't mind homosexuality but fornication is irresponible. And I don't believe for one moment that you don't know this to be true, I think you just choose not to acknowledge it. Pre-marital sex does not create families like marriage does. It is irresponsible and it leads to bad life-choices--that is a fact. It leads to children not knowing who their Fathers are, whores for mothers. If there is no marriage to bind a family together then what is there to keep it together?

 

[McBell]

Christianity developed from Judaism not paganism. It grew up with paganism surrounding it.

What's wrong with being responsible with your sexuality? I don't mind homosexuality but fornication is irresponible. And I don't believe for one moment that you don't know this to be true, I think you just choose not to acknowledge it. Pre-marital sex does not create families like marriage does. It is irresponsible and it leads to bad life-choices--that is a fact. It leads to children not knowing who their Fathers are, whores for mothers. If there is no marriage to bind a family together then what is there to keep it together?

It is interesting how some people think that marriage is what makes a family.

 

[TheKnight]

Christianity developed from Judaism not paganism. It grew up with paganism surrounding it.

What's wrong with being responsible with your sexuality? I don't mind homosexuality but fornication is irresponible. And I don't believe for one moment that you don't know this to be true, I think you just choose not to acknowledge it. Pre-marital sex does not create families like marriage does. It is irresponsible and it leads to bad life-choices--that is a fact. It leads to children not knowing who their Fathers are, whores for mothers. If there is no marriage to bind a family together then what is there to keep it together?

Because marriages, with their high rates of failure are so much better for a child? Relationships fail regardless of the title we give them or the legal benefits the couple involved received. A lot of extremely dysfunctional families start with failed marriages. Be against pre-marital sex because it's forbidden by God, don't try to half-assedly make up reasons in an attempt to appear logical. Especially particularly bad reasons.

 

[pwfaith]

seeming that Christianity developed from Paganism why are most Christians so hung up on the sex issue? Correct me if I"m wrong but I'm sure this isn't the case with Paganism.

For instance, pre-marital sex is NOT banned in Paganism, right?

I know you can interpret the Bible in many ways but the general consensus among most Christians is that Pre-marital and homosexuality is a big no no (even though Jesus certainly never directly mentions pre-marital).

This is a big turn-off (excuse the pun) to Christianity for me which is a shame as some of the philosophy is good.

Surely men and women were made with biological instincts so what's the problem with the Christians and what are they scared of?

As someone else said, Christianity stems from Judaism not Paganism.

I can only speak for myself but I don't consider myself "hung up" on sex, as a Christian. But I do believe God designed sex only for marriage and only between a man and a woman. I GREATLY disagree that the general consensus among MOST Christians is that pre-marital sex and homosexuality are not big deal. Perhaps among liberal Christians but most definitely NOT among general Christians. Conservative Christians make up the majority, and I can guarantee the majority of conservative Christians do NOT agree with that statement at.all.

Now, with that said, perhaps the majority have themselves fornicated in some way, but do not confuse participating in sin with condoning it. I have sinned, I am a sinner. I have lied, cheated, said ugly things, acted in a way I shouldn't, had premarital sex, etc yet I knew and still know all those things are wrong and sin. I did them b/c I was weak and not rightly in tune with God like I should have been.

God created sex. God created sex to be fun and enjoyable. However, God created sex to ideally be between a married man and woman. There are many reasons for this design by God. As someone said earlier, responsibility. I agree with that. Does being married automatically mean a happier family? No. But in my belief the ideal is a loving mother and a loving father so that a child grows up with both dimensions in their life. I do believe a child ends up missing a great part developmentally without one or the other in their life. In discussing this on another site, another thing that came up was STD's. STD's would be practically nonexistent if premarital sex did not exist. We wouldn't need our 12 yr olds getting vaccines for STD's that cause cancer and having all these adverse side effects from it if people weren't so "whatever" about sex. Babies are having babies b/c of this "have sex whenever, where ever, do whatever you want" mentality our society has taken on.

I personally hate the way the world is so complacent about sex. It's no longer seen as something special, cherished, or treasured. That said, I can see why those who don't see it that way, don't understand the religious view that it is. In our faith, it is something that bonds a couple together in a unique way - emotionally, spiritually, psychologically and physically. And that union is special and designed to work in unison perfectly in marriage.

Adultery; Extramarital sex; Infidelity - 27% - Wikipedia 2004 statistic

A number of studies and clinical reports suggest that up to 90 percent of first time divorces involve infidelity. Intimate betrayal infidelity unfaithful marital triangles affair just friends

I wonder how much our societies "it's just sex" attitude of premarital sex plays into this? I'm not saying it does in every case, just wondering how much it does. I know I get scoffed at with my "sex is something special, cherished, and to be treasured" line of thinking. IMO there has to be some correlation in attitudes about sex.

All I'm saying is logically there is reason for this design God created and we're seeing it more and more in our world today only not in a good way.

 

[pwfaith]

Because marriages, with their high rates of failure are so much better for a child? Relationships fail regardless of the title we give them or the legal benefits the couple involved received. A lot of extremely dysfunctional families start with failed marriages. Be against pre-marital sex because it's forbidden by God, don't try to half-assedly make up reasons in an attempt to appear logical. Especially particularly bad reasons.

While this is true studies show marriages where people wait are stronger.

If a couple abstains from sex before marriage, they are 29 to 47% more likely to enjoy sex after marriage than those who cohabit. Sexual satisfaction rises considerably more after marriage (Hering 1994:4).

Women who cohabited are 3.3 times more likely to have a secondary sex partner after marriage than non-cohabitors (Forste & Tanfer 1996).

About two-fifths of all children in America spend some time living with their mother and a cohabiting partner (P. Smock, Ann. Rev. Sociol. 2000).

A recent British study found that child abuse was twenty times more common in cases where the mother was cohabiting with a man other than her husband.

Those who are sexually active before marriage are much more likely to divorce.
A study of 2,746 women in the National Survey of Family Growth performed by Dr. Kahn of the Univ of Maryland and Dr. London of the National Center for Health Statistics found that non-virgin brides increase their odds of divorce by about 60%. Some would argue that cohabitation does not automatically mean that sex is taking place. However, cohabitation and sexual relations are related or that there is a strong correlation between them. Sex usually does accompany cohabitation (de Neui n.d.); Webster's Dictionary, in fact, defines cohabitation as "living together as or as if husband and wife." …Therefore, the assumption is made throughout this writing (granting some occasional exceptions) that cohabitants do have sexual relations.

Those who have had premarital sex are more likely to have extramarital affairs as well.
Premarital sexual attitudes and behavior do not change after one marries…Research indicates that if one is willing to experience sex before marriage, a higher level of probability exists that one will do the same afterwards. This is especially true for women; those who engaged in sex before marriage are more than twice as likely to have extramarital affairs as those who did not have premarital sex. When it comes to staying faithful, married partners have higher rates of loyalty every time. One study, done over a 5-year period, reported in Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles indicates 90% of married women were monogamous, compared to 60% of cohabiting women. Statistics were even more dramatic with male faithfulness: 90% of married men remained true to their brides, while only 43% of cohabiting men stayed true to their partner (Ciavola 1997). In another study published in the Journal of Marriage and the Family researchers analyzed the relationships of 1,235 women, ages 20 to 37, and found that women that had cohabited before marriage were 3.3 times more likely to have a secondary sex partner after marriage (Forste and Tanfer 1996:33-47). It was also found that married women were "5 times less likely to have a secondary sex partner than cohabiting women" and that "cohabiting relationships appeared to be more similar to dating relationships than to marriage."

(for the sake of argument the author states that cohabitation indicates having a sexual relationship - link)

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As I said, God's design is for sex to be within the confines of marriage and statistics show it is more beneficial to us as individuals, couples and as a community when we follow His design.

 

[rusra02]

seeming that Christianity developed from Paganism why are most Christians so hung up on the sex issue? Correct me if I"m wrong but I'm sure this isn't the case with Paganism.

For instance, pre-marital sex is NOT banned in Paganism, right?

I know you can interpret the Bible in many ways but the general consensus among most Christians is that Pre-marital and homosexuality is a big no no (even though Jesus certainly never directly mentions pre-marital).

This is a big turn-off (excuse the pun) to Christianity for me which is a shame as some of the philosophy is good.

Surely men and women were made with biological instincts so what's the problem with the Christians and what are they scared of?

Sex is a gift from God, and misusing this gift results in great harm to oneself and others. The Bible is quite clear that fornication and homosexuality are sins. (1 Corinthians 6:9,10) Consider a few "problems" caused by such conduct:

• AIDS, and other STDs
• Unwanted pregnancies, many ended by aborting the unborn child
• Single parent families, with children often raised in poverty
• Parents unready for the responsibility of child-rearing, resulting in child neglect and abuse
• Emotional distress,Depression, and Suicide
• Harm to the family of those committing such acts

The Bible is not prudish about sex. It urges husbands to "rejoice with the wife of your youth,...Let her own breasts intoxicate you at all times. With her love may you be in an ecstasy constantly. (Proverbs 5:18-20)
So true Christians will refrain from fornication and homosexual conduct, primarily to please God, who commands us: "For this is what God wills,...tht you abstain from fornication." (1 Thessalonians 4:3)

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[pwfaith]

The Bible is not prudish about sex.

Perhaps the OP should read the book Song of Songs of Solomon in the bible

 

[krsnaraja]

Christians are sexually insecure because Christ himself did not engage in sex. He never advocated sex. He did not teach his disciples the joys of sex. He did not teach them kamasutra. He did not in anyway uttered the word sexual intercourse to his disciples. In other words, Christ never debated with his disciples on sex & homosexuality. & to think Christ disciples were married or single father or whatever.

If we compare Christ with Krishna. Krishna was also surrounded by beautiful women ( damsels of Vrajabhumi ). They bath together in the Yamuna river. Krishna was always playing his flute or slaying asuras. Krishna does care whom he kills e.g his uncle Kamsa, etc. Krishna is God. Christ is God. Who is Christ? He is Krishna`s half elder brother, Balarama-the Adi Guru.

Back to why Christians are insecure with sex? Simply because Christ the brother of Krishna is not a womanizer like Krishna. He`s a straight guy. A serious guy. A decent guy. A refuge to all e.g dog-eaters, murderers, rapists, perverts, pedophiles, thieves, swindler, conmen, lawyers, liars, etc.

 

[Awoon]

Let us hope animals and plants dont stop breeding.

 

[pwfaith]

Christians are sexually insecure because Christ himself did not engage in sex. He never advocated sex. He did not teach his disciples the joys of sex.

Call me crazy but I seem to recall him having bigger goals and issues at the time than teaching his disciples about sex He did teach them about joy and how to find true joy, if you truly have that in your heart it will extend to other areas of your life. Keep in mind Jesus' ministry only lasted 3 yrs, and his goal was saving lost souls, not really making sure his men were happy in bed with their women

 

[Flankerl]

"Physicians for life" as a source. I think iam going to quote something like "murderers for death" or "child molesters for rape" as a source in a future discussion.


Also dear OP, there is something outside of the USA. You know the not prude part of the world.

 

[Renji]

In case of the premarital sex issue, the Church does not allow it because we believe that it's sacred, hence, should be done through sanctification/blessing of marriage. In the case of homosexuality, my view about it is that the Church doesn't actually condemn this people, but the act of homosexuality. We do not "attack" these individuals; we "attack" the issue.

 

[yourgraceisenough]

I don't think Christians are remotely hung up on sex, the bible teaches common sense stuff on being happy and healthy...

 

[-Peacemaker-]

If that "Biological Instinct" were to be obeyed at all times, there'd be even more STDs than there is now, and there's a reason why there are so many STDs and unwanted pregnancies to begin with.

Also, there's an apparent natural instinct to want to destroy anyone who gets with your significant other (unless you have a thing for swing, which goes back to Point 1) If you disagree, go try to get with a biker's girlfriend and tell me how that works out.

And there's also the whole emotional issues that girls go through.

And paternity issues. Those are big.

And even with modern "technology" (The Pill has horrible side effects and so do abortions), protection doesn't stop things like Cervical cancer.

So all in all, it looks like marriage and faithfulness is the best strategy.

Statistically, relationships that begin with co-habitation are far more likely to break up earlier than not.

As for male-male relations, there's a reason why most men have a natural avoidance to it, and there's a reason why Intestinal Protozoa is so common among those who do it, and there's a reason their life spans are significantly shorter. And there's a reason why they have by far the highest STD rates such as accounting for over 60% of all syphillis (and it ain't from "lack of education). And Oral Cancer. Are gay men more at risk for cancer? | Reuters Gay Men More Likely to Have Had Cancer - US News and World Report And there's a reason why most guys don't want to have male friends who see them as meat.

Why not go one step further and say there's nothing wrong with pedos while you're at it.

It's amazing how the odds that a child will grow up to a criminal sky rocket when born to an unwed mother.

 

[yourgraceisenough]

hey life is tough....