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Why does God allow loneliness to exist ?

Massimo2002

Active Member
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.
 

Quintessence

Consults with Trees
Staff member
Premium Member
Having human friends and/or family is related to but does not directly correspond to loneliness. That is, some experience that emotion while having human friends and/or family. And some don't experience that emotion when they lack human friends and/or family. Humans are diverse animals that think and behave in different ways from one another and even from themselves under different times and situations. That is simply the way of things, or the "grand scheme" of things. One can either accept that and make peace with it, or deny it and make misery from it. Whether you want to bring the Abrahamic god into the picture is your own affair, regardless of what someone else told you you are "supposed" to do.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.
My husband of 37 years passed on two years ago so now I don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about me.
I do not feel lonely, nor do I feel a need for romance, but I could sure use some help around the house and what is left of a yard.

One reason I do not feel lonely is because I have eight Persian cats and one or more of them is always by my side, and I have an ample amount of birds and other critters on my deck to keep me company. I also have lots of people to post to on this forum.

I do not think that people being lonely is part of God's grand scheme. It just happens as a result of circumstances in peoples' lives.
People cannot just order up a family they never had nor can they order up friends like a burger at a restaurant.
 

Massimo2002

Active Member
My husband of 37 years passed on two years ago so now I don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about me.
I do not feel lonely, nor do I feel a need for romance, but I could sure use some help around the house and what is left of a yard.

One reason I do not feel lonely is because I have eight Persian cats and one or more of them is always by my side, and I have an ample amount of birds and other critters on my deck to keep me company. I also have lots of people to post to on this forum.

I do not think that people being lonely is part of God's grand scheme. It just happens as a result of circumstances in peoples' lives.
People cannot just order up a family they never had nor can they order up friends like a burger at a restaurant.
I know that but in a perfect world people could order a friend or sexual partner like buying things at a grocery store.
 

Massimo2002

Active Member
Having human friends and/or family is related to but does not directly correspond to loneliness. That is, some experience that emotion while having human friends and/or family. And some don't experience that emotion when they lack human friends and/or family. Humans are diverse animals that think and behave in different ways from one another and even from themselves under different times and situations. That is simply the way of things, or the "grand scheme" of things. One can either accept that and make peace with it, or deny it and make misery from it. Whether you want to bring the Abrahamic god into the picture is your own affair, regardless of what someone else told you you are "supposed" to do.
Humans aren't animals.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
I know that but in a perfect world people could order a friend or sexual partner like buying things at a grocery store.
In a perfect world I could have found another husband, especially considering how may different dating sites I have joined...
Sexual partners are a helluva lot easier to find than husbands or friends.
 

Madsaac

Active Member
Humans aren't animals
I think we are, we are highly evolved animals and some are going to be lonely. It’s part of the evolutionary journey of the human being, the incredible diversity that makes up the rich tapestry of who we are what we will become.

And loneliness is one part of that.
 

Balthazzar

N. Germanic Descent
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.

I don't know, but it might have something to do with survival, adaptation, and motivated necessities. I try to find ways to counter the lonely feeling of solitude, but it only satisfies so much for so long. It helps that I'm socially awkward, but in that awkwardness is some benefit. I'm able to focus more on development and education and skill set. At one time, it wasn't such a benefit, but this is only because I chose to cope with my social awkwardness differently. I can only handle being around people for short durations before I either close my eyes and choose to drift, or pace and find some way to occupy my hands (woodwork/cleaning/art/writing/etc.). It's simply part of life (my everyday) and I'm unsure how the benefit will end up playing out. I don't worry about it as much as I once did. I have things to do anyway.
 

wellwisher

Well-Known Member
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.
Loneliness occurs when you become too dependent on the external sensory reality to entertain you and that no longer works. In the story of Adam in the Garden of Eden; before Eve, Adam is alone in paradise, yet he gets lonely in paradise. So God puts Adam asleep and makes Eve, from Adam's rib; cloning, and she becomes his new external distraction; mate.

The solution to loneliness is to find your inner self. Eve came from Adam ribs; his inner self. Ribs protect the heart, so that which once protected the heart, can become a prison, that separate you from your heart.
 

PureX

Veteran Member
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.
Perhaps the loneliness is to show them that they need to learn how to interact with others.

For some people this comes easily. For others it does not. And sometimes it takes a lot of courage, and perhaps even some special help, to learn how to do this.

We humans are not designed to be alone. We are a social, cooperative species. Our well-being depends on our mutual appreciation and cooperation. So an inability or an unwillingness to learn how to engage and interact with others is a serious human handicap that needs to be addressed, and dealt with, and not just blamed on god or fate, and complained about.
 

Kathryn

It was on fire when I laid down on it.
Here's my situation. I am currently very lonely. But I lost my husband, who was my boon companion, a few years ago. I was still working part time and also very involved in the community and volunteering. But I moved a few months ago and then almost immediately tore a tendon in my knee so I had to keep it elevated and basically did nothing for two months. Now it's super hot and sticky here so I haven't been doing much other than going to the gym a few times a week. But I don't blame God, I blame the circumstances.
 

Evangelicalhumanist

"Truth" isn't a thing...
Premium Member
Some people don't have friends or family or really anyone who cares about them and yet I'm supposed to believe that this has some grand scheme yeah I'm not buying that.
Your life is not up to God -- it's up to you.

Hiding behind a screen in your basement or backroom isn't going to help you meet people. The only way to do that is to get out and put yourself at the risk of not being immediately accepted or liked by everybody you meet. But even in spite of that risk, you are pretty much certain, if you give it a chance, to meet some people who just might turn into acquaintances and even, with luck, friends.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Here's my situation. I am currently very lonely. But I lost my husband, who was my boon companion, a few years ago. I was still working part time and also very involved in the community and volunteering. But I moved a few months ago and then almost immediately tore a tendon in my knee so I had to keep it elevated and basically did nothing for two months. Now it's super hot and sticky here so I haven't been doing much other than going to the gym a few times a week. But I don't blame God, I blame the circumstances.
I am sorry to hear about all of that and I hope things get better for you. Can you get out to Church, where you might meet some people?

Although I don't really feel lonely, I have circumstances that lead to my social isolation, like not having much time and not having places to go where I might meet people, but I don't blame God for that. I also don't blame myself since I have little control over my present life circumstances.

I can do some things so I am starting to make an effort to attend Baha'i activities since some are in person as opposed to only on Zoom. I went to a Baha'i unity picnic last week and next week I am going to a Baha'i Feast. Even though I don't 'feel' lonely, I think that socializing is a good thing to do once in a while, and it also offers opportunities to start friendships.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Your life is not up to God -- it's up to you.

Hiding behind a screen in your basement or backroom isn't going to help you meet people. The only way to do that is to get out and put yourself at the risk of not being immediately accepted or liked by everybody you meet. But even in spite of that risk, you are pretty much certain, if you give it a chance, to meet some people who just might turn into acquaintances and even, with luck, friends.
If a person feels lonely the only way to remedy that is to make an effort to get out and meet people, but not everyone feels lonely, just because they are alone. Being lonely is not the same thing as being alone. I am alone most of the time but I don't feel lonely. I feel more lonely in a crowd than I feel being home alone.
 

Kathryn

It was on fire when I laid down on it.
I am sorry to hear about all of that and I hope things get better for you. Can you get out to Church, where you might meet some people?

Although I don't really feel lonely, I have circumstances that lead to my social isolation, like not having much time and not having places to go where I might meet people, but I don't blame God for that. I also don't blame myself since I have little control over my present life circumstances.

I can do some things so I am starting to make an effort to attend Baha'i activities since some are in person as opposed to only on Zoom. I went to a Baha'i unity picnic last week and next week I am going to a Baha'i Feast. Even though I don't 'feel' lonely, I think that socializing is a good thing to do once in a while, and it also offers opportunities to start friendships.
Oh, I go to church but I do blame myself in some ways because I am sure that not only do I not flirt, but I also seem to have lost my vim and vigor if that makes sense. But I am going to a church picnic next week, so maybe that will help, I don't know.
 

Evangelicalhumanist

"Truth" isn't a thing...
Premium Member
If a person feels lonely the only way to remedy that is to make an effort to get out and meet people, but not everyone feels lonely, just because they are alone. Being lonely is not the same thing as being alone. I am alone most of the time but I don't feel lonely. I feel more lonely in a crowd than I feel being home alone.
As an introvert, I'm much the same. Still, I need friendship and love, as I think most people do. And to that end, I have to make myself available and open to friendship. Introversion doesn't prevent that, just makes it a little quieter and less overt.
 
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