All My Journal Packets (Files)

[The Transcended Omniverse]

I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord, and across the sky, flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonged to me, and the other, to the Lord. When the last scene of my life flashed before us, I looked back at the footprints in the sand. I noticed that, many times along the path of my life, there was only one set of footprints. I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest, and saddest times in my life. This really bothered me, and I questioned the Lord about it.

“Lord, you said that, once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But, I've noticed that, during the most troublesome times in my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why, in times when I needed you the most, you should leave me. The Lord replied, “My precious, precious child. I love you, and I'd never, never leave you during your times of trial, and suffering. When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you."

My Reply: Thanks for sharing that poem. I just hope you're right about god being loving, caring, and not having me go through pointless suffering.

Other Person's Response: Good to hear that you're on the road to full recovery. Does it ever occur to you that you could use your own struggles to help others going through a similar process? You've been where they are, and you understand what they're going through. Maybe your struggles were a gift, which you can share with others. If you had received instant healing, then you'd have no understanding of the journey to recovery.

My Reply: I have no interest in helping others though. As a matter of fact, I lack interest in so many things. For example, I have no interest in learning new things (which is why I'm a very dumb person), I don't care what clothes my mother buys me, I don't care about growing as an individual, etc. I also don't care what's going on in the world, which is why I don't watch the news, or read the newspaper. Neither do I care about other people suffering in this world.

I just let them carry on with their lives, while I carry on with my own life. Even if a person suffered in agony, and died before my very eyes, I don't think I'd care. It just wouldn't bother me. But, I'd still help that dying person, only if I had to. If I didn't have to, then I'd just let him suffer and die. Perhaps someone else would then come along and help him. In summary, I'm just a very casual person who doesn't care about much.

Other Person's Response: But, during your miserable struggles, you're not a casual person, since you're not doing well. You're in a state of psychological turmoil, you become hateful, and violent.

My Reply: Yes. But, when I'm happy again, I'm the casual person who has fun, doing the hobbies he loves to do.

Other Person's Response: So, in order to be a casual person, you need to feel casual?

My Reply: Yes. That feeling would be a positive emotion. When I feel troubled and miserable, I'm no longer a casual person.

Other Person's Response: It seems you're a cold, uncaring person. Does this mean you treat others with a cold, cruel attitude?

My Reply: Not at all. I have a very kind, polite personality that many people love about me. So, I wouldn't describe myself as cold and cruel. Rather, I'm just a casual guy who doesn't care about much. So, I'm casual and carefree. But, during an emotional crisis, I do become cruel and hateful, since I can only have negative experiences. I also display a very negative attitude.

Other Person's Response: Do you even become cruel and hateful towards your therapist during an emotional crisis?

My Reply: No. Only towards those who give me a stern or agitated attitude, or name call me.

Other Person's Response:

I have no interest in helping others though. ... Neither do I care about other people suffering in this world. I just let them carry on with their lives, while I carry on with my own life. Even if a person suffered in agony, and died before my very eyes, I don't think I'd care. It just wouldn't bother me. ... In summary, I'm just a very casual person who doesn't care about much.

Yet, you complain because God seems to have no interest in helping you. You complain because God, and the heavenly beings, don't seem to care about your suffering in this world. You complain because God just lets you carry on with your life, while God goes about his business.

You complain because God doesn't seem to care, because God doesn't seem bothered about your suffering, because God is so casual where you are concerned. You have truly created a God in your own image. You wonder why god didn't heal your misery? It's because you don't help others. You must give to the universe if you want the universe to give to you in return.

My Reply: Well, I think I'm a decent human being just the way I am, which means god should see me as worthy of being healed/assisted. There are qualities about me worth appreciating. For example, I'm still kind and polite towards my family, and others out in the community. There are many other qualities about me worth appreciating as well. So, god should accept me for who I am, rather than seeing me as someone unworthy of healing. If he's an all-loving god, he'd appreciate me, and heal me, rather than leaving me to suffer. I, myself, am not an all-loving person. But, like I said, I'm still a decent person who should be worthy of healing in god's eyes.

I shouldn't have to meet a higher standard as an individual in order to be worthy of god's healing, since god should love all humans, and, thus, heal them. So, god, and these heavenly beings, should lower their standards, if they already have high standards. Especially considering that many kind people accept me, appreciate me, don't expect me to meet a higher standard, and don't think I'm unworthy if I don't meet said standard. As long as I'm a kind person who helps these people when they ask for my help (an example being my family), then that's good enough in their eyes, they think I'm worthy of being assisted, and getting the things I want, which is why my mother buys me the things I want.

But, I don't need to help the world, contribute to science, make the world a better place, or any of that. So, I can just let the world suffer, and go about its business. Also, even if I was a very giving, helpful person, I still don't think god, or the universe, would've healed my misery. So, I don't think my lack of healing has anything to do with me not being a giving, helpful person. After all, even very loving, giving, helpful, compassionate people are allowed to go through immense suffering that strips their lives of beauty, joy, and worth. They don't get healing from god, heavenly beings, or the universe, and they're allowed to suffer in a dark pit of despair, hate, etc. An example would be miserable, suicidal people.

Other Person's Response: I heard that people, who go on heavenly trips during their near death experience, report that god is an all-loving being who loves all humans, and doesn't judge them as disgusting or unworthy. That even applies to the heavenly beings.

My Reply: Then why didn't they heal my misery, if they loved me, and thought I was worthy of healing?

Other Person's Response: If god, or these heavenly beings, required you to help humanity, or do something else, in order to earn their healing, then they should've told you. They should've bestowed the knowledge upon you that you should do these things.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Do other kind people, such as your mother, sometimes expect you to help them, or other people?

My Reply: Yes. I do so because I'm expected to. Not because I care. I don't want to be given a stern attitude, punished, and not get the things I want. So, that's why I have to help. Well, actually, I've been known to feel positive emotions when giving to others (providing I do have my ability to feel positive emotions). That means I do care, since there were caring thoughts, making me feel that way. But, giving to others isn't something I really have a passion for though. It's no different than how I have no passion for football, dentistry, chemistry, physics, etc.

Sure, I might feel some joy in doing those things. But, they're not something I'd want to dedicate my life to. To expect me to dedicate my life to helping humanity, and contributing to the world, would be no different than expecting me to dedicate my life to football, dentistry, etc. It's unnecessary, and it's up to the individual what he wishes to dedicate his life to. So, frowning upon me, or thinking I'm unworthy of healing and assistance, since I don't dedicate my life to something I don't need to dedicate my life to, is absurd.

Other Person's Response: Helping others, and contributing to the world, shouldn't be compared to football, dentistry, etc. I think it's necessary, since it shows love and compassion towards humanity.

My Reply: I don't see it that way. If there was a stranger on the road, with a sign that reads: "Will work for food," then I don't have to help that person. I can just be like the rest of the world, who'd drive on by him, or walk past him, without helping him. Another example would be donating blood or organs, and donating to charity. Many people don't donate. It's something they have no passion for. But, that doesn't make them repulsive people who are deserving of punishment, ridicule, scorn, etc.

Other Person's Response: Even if others, including your mother, didn't expect you to help the world from time to time, I think you should help the world. You should, at least, make some small contribution to the world.

My Reply: Again, I don't think I need to, just as how a person doesn't need to play football at all.

Other Person's Response: If the world didn't have helping people, it would be a horrible place to live.

My Reply: But, there are plenty of helping people in the world. So, I don't see any need for me to be one of those people. But, let's pretend, even if I was the only person on this planet who got to live a nice, luxurious life, while the rest of humanity lived very difficult lives, filled with poverty and illness, I wouldn't need to help anyone in this world. Humanity can just help themselves, and help each other. I don't need to be a part of the picture. For example, if there was a team in this world, helping one another, then I don't need to be a part of that team.

Other Person's Response: I think the reason why you don't help humanity isn't because you're a cold psychopath. Rather, it's because you're like the rest of the world, and you live your life by a lower standard. You don't expect much from yourself, and you think you're good enough as an individual.

My Reply: Yes. There are many hedonists who just live for their own happiness, don't help humanity, and think they're decent human beings just the way they are.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: You said you didn't want to help humanity, and that you just want to live for yourself. So, why should god, or these spiritual beings, help you out, nurture you, and protect you from life's hardships then?

My Reply: Because that's just what an all-loving being would do. Since positive emotions are the only things that make life beautiful and worth living, then an all-loving being would see to it that human beings have their positive emotions preserved. Besides, it's not like I'm someone who's unworthy of being helped. I'm a kind, polite individual, and I think that's enough for me to be worthy of aid, nurture, and protection.

Other Person's Response: I think, if someone doesn't help humanity and contribute to the world, that bad karma will fall upon him.

My Reply: The universe just needs to appreciate human beings. Even though there are some people who don't help humanity and contribute to the world, there are still qualities about these people worth appreciating.

Other Person's Response: Do you help your family when they need your help?

My Reply: Yes. That's mandatory. But, I don't need to live my life, helping out humanity, since that's optional. My family is fine with me not helping humanity, and they appreciate me for who I am. Other families don't appreciate their sons and daughters like my family does. Instead, they expect things from them, and frown upon them if they don't meet these expectations. I think people need to learn to appreciate things more. Some people can't appreciate my writing, since they don't think it's good enough, and some people don't appreciate me as a human being either.

Other Person's Response: The very fact you help your family when they need help should be appreciated by other people, too.

My Reply: Yes. At least I'm not like some spoiled person who doesn't help his family.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother have any problems with you?

My Reply: Not that I know of. She's accepting of me, and appreciates me. But, she does have problems with other people, since they do things she doesn't like, such as leeching money off of her, or treating her with an attitude she doesn't like. Since I don't do anything like that, then that's why she has no issues with me.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother sometimes have high expectations of you?

My Reply: Actually, she gets a bit disappointed when I don't do something right, or when I don't do something that I was unaware I was supposed to do. She'll just need to understand that I'm not perfect, I can't hear her call my name every single time when she needs my help, I'm unaware and incapable of many things, and what she should expect from me is failure on many occasions. I can only do my best, and I can't meet her expectations all the time. Other than that, she doesn't have extremely high expectations of me, such as that of a slave-driving mother.

Other Person's Response: What do you do for a living? I'm just curious as to how much life experience you have.

My Reply: I do my hobbies, such as composing, and playing video games. I also ride with my mother to stores sometimes, and I also go to the gym to walk on the treadmill. That about summarizes my life. Some people would say I should be doing so much more with my life, such as learning new things, and putting myself through hardships for the sake of helping others. But, I'm not going to do any of those things. I'm just going to live the lifestyle I want to live.

Other Person's Response: I realize you're presenting all your arguments in an attempt to help people understand why god is the one to blame for all your pointless suffering. But, what if it's the opposite? What if you're the one to blame, and your suffering wasn't pointless?

My Reply: You're right. It could be the opposite. But, it just doesn't seem like it.

Other Person's Response: There will be some people who think like you. They'll think it was the fault of god, and these heavenly beings, for allowing you to go through all this pointless suffering. But, then you'll have people who'll just blame you. So, different people will have different views.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: People suffer, and some gain much compassion towards others. Their struggles make them more giving towards humanity. But, some people don't gain such benefits from their struggles. An example would be someone like you. This says to me suffering doesn't serve a grand purpose. It's just there, and you either benefit from it, or you don't.

My Reply: Right. So, there might be no god, or afterlife, and suffering just happens in a universe of pure chance. If suffering did serve some grand purpose, then I would've expected those people, who'd gain much benefit from suffering, to be the ones to suffer, while people, such as myself, wouldn't have suffered from miserable struggles, since they were pointless forms of suffering for us that were a waste of our lives. But, the universe doesn't work that way. It seems anyone could suffer, and some benefit, while others don't benefit from it.

Other Person's Response: In the distant future, I bet there will be cures for illnesses, including clinical depression. I bet there'd even be something that would instantly cure a person of an emotional crisis. So, that means, if you were suffering from this misery-inducing worry in the distant future, then you could purchase the cure, which would instantly rid of that misery-inducing worry, and bring you back to a state of joy again.

That would even include anyone else who suffers from misery-inducing worries that are as chronic and devastating as yours. They could just instantly cure themselves if they had the money to buy the cure. Given this, if god, and these heavenly beings, do exist, then it seems they just don't care. If someone suffers in this time period like you have, then they'd allow that person to suffer without healing him, and no cure being invented for him.

At the same time, if this person suffered in the distant future, then they'd allow that person to purchase a cure to instantly rid himself of his mental turmoil, so he can regain his positive experiences, and no longer has to remain in that miserable, suicidal state, which stripped him of all experiences of beauty, love, and joy. So, it seems to me they just don't care one way or the other what happens to humanity, and it seems suffering doesn't serve any grand purpose.

It's either there, and people bear with it in a time period where there's no cure for it. Or, it's there, and people can just cure it in the future. Given this, I think it's better to assume that god, and these heavenly beings, don't exist. A universe where humans are allowed to suffer, and no heavenly being intervenes, seems a lot like a meaningless universe of pure chance, and no grand purpose, where humans are just insignificant, transient life forms who only have one life to live.

My Reply: You're right. But, like I said, I still have to remain undecided on the existence of god, the supernatural, and the afterlife.

Other Person's Response: I heard there's a form of therapy that instantly relieves people of their emotional suffering. Here's a youtube link to it:

It combines Linguistic Programming (NLP) and Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). If god inspired people to invent this technique, since he cares about humanity, and wants people to be healed of their mental suffering, including you, then he would've instantly relieved your suffering from the very beginning, including the suffering of so many other people, using his divine healing powers.

There's no need for him to inspire people to invent ways to relieve the suffering of others, when he can just directly, and instantly, heal those who are suffering. So, that says to me god, and these heavenly beings, don't care about the suffering of humanity, and it's instead other human beings who care, since they're the ones inventing these techniques, and finding other ways to relieve the suffering of others.

My Reply: Thanks for sharing. But, I tried that technique by following the instructions, and it didn't work for me. Perhaps I'm doing it wrong somehow.

Other Person's Response: Personally, I don't think god had you go through all this suffering for a good reason. He's just allowing you to suffer, since he doesn't care, and it's just up to you to rely on others to help you. It's also up to you to find ways to help yourself.

My Reply: Yes. If god had people go through such suffering for a good reason, then there'd be no cure for said suffering in the future. That says god allows suffering, since he doesn't care, and you're either lucky, and you get a cure for it, or you're unlucky, and have to live with it.

Other Person's Response: Since there are therapeutic methods that help speed up a person's recovery process from mental grief and agony, this already conveys a message, and that message would be: "You shouldn't have to suffer like this. There are things out there that can help you, so you don't have to suffer for so long." Given this message, why doesn't god just instantly cure someone of his mental turmoil? That would be an instant, full recovery right there!

My Reply: If god does exist, then think it's because he doesn't care, and it's instead other people who care, since they're the ones inventing ways to help speed up a person's recovery. Also, if god allows people to suffer for a very good reason, and that's his wish, then there wouldn't be methods out there to help ease suffering, since such methods would go against god's wish, and god wouldn't allow such methods to be invented. So, that says, if god does exist, then he doesn't allow suffering for a good reason. He just allows it because he doesn't care.

Other Person's Response: That all goes back to what you said earlier, which was: "If god allows suffering for a very good reason, then why would god allow cures to be discovered for said suffering?"

My Reply: Yes. It seems to me god just allows anything to happen.

Other Person's Response: I heard, from spiritual believers, that suffering exists for a good purpose, and that people, who have cancer, and other horrible forms of suffering, are going through all of this for a good reason. But, if that were the case, then wouldn't

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

god, and these spiritual beings in the heavenly realms, prevent cures from being discovered? If all this suffering is so good, then why cure it? Why allow science to progress to the point where a utopia life is eventually created for us, where virtually all diseases and forms of suffering are eliminated?

It makes all that suffering seem pointless because people living in this future, utopia world would look back and wonder what was the point of going through all this suffering. If all that suffering was meant to be eliminated, then why go through it in the first place? Why did god allow it to exist to begin with? If god's plan was to create a utopia life for us, then why didn't he create one for us since the beginning of creation, rather than allowing science to eventually progress to the point where a utopia life is created for us, while so many people suffer in the meantime, waiting for cures?

My Reply: Another question to ask is: "If souls are here to learn and grow through suffering and disease, and this is the ultimate goal in life, then how would god, and these spiritual beings, respond once all that suffering and disease is eliminated in a future, utopia life?"

Other Person's Response: You're right when you say it would be wonderful if god instantly healed those in need of healing. Especially those who have little control over their emotions, and are very likely to harm themselves, and others, during an emotional crisis. By allowing these people to bear through their emotional crisis to the very end, that puts themselves and others at risk of being harmed. But, if their minds could instantly be healed, then that risk would be gone.

My Reply: Exactly. Sure, those people might still be a risk to themselves and others, even in their fully recovered state of mind, since they might feel joy in doing risky things. But, at least their emotional crisis would've been gone, which would've posed a serious risk of harm. I, myself, have felt violently enraged so many times during each one of my emotional crises. Fortunately, I never acted out on those feelings. The less control you have over your emotions, the more likely it is you'll harm yourself and/or others. So, the very fact I never harmed myself or others shows I do have some control. But, let's pretend I hardly had any control at all. It would've been god's fault for not healing my mind of an emotional crisis, and allowing me to harm myself and/or others.

Other Person's Response: If you felt violently enraged, and killed someone, then god would allow you to remain in prison. So, not only does god allow you to suffer so much, but he'd also allow you to live your life in prison.

My Reply: Yes. He really doesn't care about me (if he does exist). If he's so loving and caring, not only would he heal my mind of suffering, so I can be happy again, but also so I could avoid the risk of going to prison. The only thing that puts me at risk of going to prison is an emotional crisis, since that's the only time I feel violently enraged. Other than that, I'm a very polite person who's not at risk of committing any crimes. I obey the laws of society, and conduct myself in a moral fashion.

Other Person's Response: Like you said though, you're not going to act out on those violent feelings, are you?

My Reply: I'm not. So, I don't think anyone has to worry about me going to prison.

Other Person's Response: I heard you had a composing dream to live for. Apparently, god doesn't care about that either, since he allows you to remain in a miserable state, where you can't enjoy your composing. Furthermore, if you went to prison because you killed someone, due to a feeling of violent rage that occurred during an ongoing emotional crisis, god wouldn't care that you could no longer pursue your composing dream, and had to live your life in prison. So, I think this says that whatever talents or goals we have are things god doesn't care about.

My Reply: Yes. So, amazingly talented people, who say they're blessed by god with a talent to pursue, might be wrong. Sure, they have an amazing talent. But, that doesn't mean it was a divine talent that was bestowed by a loving god who ensures that these talented individuals achieve their goals. So, this says to me human beings are just here, and there's no grand purpose to life. Nobody is destined to achieve goals, which means god doesn't ensure that we achieve our goals. Some people are lucky, and manage to achieve their goals and dreams, while others are plain unlucky. So, this seems like a universe of luck, rather than destiny, or a grand purpose. Given this, god might not exist, and this really is the meaningless universe skeptics always talk about.

Other Person's Response: So, that means people, who have amazing talents and goals, aren't chosen by god. If they were, then god would care about them, their talents, and goals, and he'd ensure they achieve their goals and dreams.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: In regards to god not healing suffering people, if there was a loving parent who had healing abilities, then he'd heal a suffering child in need of healing. So, the very fact god doesn't heal those in need of healing, must mean he's not a loving god.

My Reply: You're right. That's assuming if god does exist.

Other Person's Response: I believe god, and these heavenly beings, exist. But, I don't think they allow suffering for any good reason. This Earthly existence is simply a domain of free will, where they don't intervene, and they allow people to make whatever choices they make in whatever circumstances they face.

My Reply: It seems they just don't care about humanity then, since they don't intervene. So, you can see why this whole idea of Earth being a domain of free will, where god, and these heavenly beings, don't intervene, clearly depicts them as unloving beings. I'll give another example that gives this depiction. In my example with the talented singer who permanently lost her voice, that's like a big middle finger to her, and it's like saying to her: "I don't care about you, and I'm not going to restore your voice, even when I have the power to. Just use your free will to do something else with your life because you're not ever going to be a singer again."

Other Person's Response: Suffering is allowed because it erases sin, and raises our level of consciousness.

My Reply: If that's the purpose of suffering, then why allow cures to be discovered for suffering?

Other Person's Response: I think god allows suffering because it has to do with karma. If we inflicted suffering upon someone in a previous life, then the moment we reincarnate, we must suffer in this lifetime.

My Reply: Again, if that's the reason why he allows suffering, then why does he allow cures for suffering? A future utopia life, where all suffering has been eliminated through cures, contradicts this purpose of suffering you put forth, as well as any other purpose put forth as to why god allows suffering.

Other Person's Response: I'd contend there's no contradiction. An all knowing God, omniscient God, knows the fallen nature of humanity will include self-destructive behaviors that lead to suffering. That knowledge would also include humanity contracting diseases, like cancer.

The Creator insured a means of healing so as to address those maladies. Inspiring minds to invent medicinal remedies after Creator gave us plants and herbs for healing naturally.

Christian Scientists don't believe in physician assistance. They think prayer will solve all their ills. But what if God created science and doctors so that those would serve as an answer to those prayers.

My Reply: Again, there's no need for all of that when god is all powerful, and can instantly heal all suffering people in need of healing in the blink of an eye.

Other Person's Response:

Again, there's no need for all of that when god is all powerful, and can instantly heal all suffering people in need of healing in the blink of an eye.

Completely agree. I hate to see people suffer in a lot of pain emotionally. For example, there’s no reason my sister should be going through what she's going through right now. If I had the opportunity, I’d erase her problems, and the problems of anyone else in need of their problems erased.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I think god should imbue human beings with his energy around them. It would be an aura that would protect them, and would heal them of any illness or suffering they have.

My Reply: I agree.

Other Person's Response: If an amazingly talented singer permanently lost her voice, and god didn't restore it, I'd actually consider that a blessing because there's so much problems when a person, who has an amazing talent, enters into fame, fortune, stardom, being idolized, etc. It's best to just keep a low profile.

My Reply: But, what about a talented singer who doesn't want to sing for any fame, fortune, etc., and would never enter into fame, fortune, etc.? If she just wishes to sing privately because she likes to do it as a hobby, and finds it profoundly beautiful, then it would be a blessing for god to restore her voice if she permanently lost it. As a side note, few people enter into fame, fortune, etc.

Other Person's Response: I think you were right when you said earlier that your miserable struggles were pointless, unnecessary hardships because, not only is god, and these heavenly beings, allowing suffering for no grand purpose, but all your misery didn't result in you obtaining something that was worth all that mental suffering.

My Reply: Exactly.

Other Person's Response: I believe in god. But, I don't think he's a being who's allowing suffering because, if he was, then there'd be the contradictions you've pointed out earlier, such as god allowing suffering, and allowing cures for suffering. I think god is literally everything, and all circumstances that occur.

My Reply: Many people, who have heavenly trips during their near death experience, report meeting god, who's an actual being of light. In addition, these people meet heavenly beings.

Other Person's Response: If you had the choice, would you violently threaten god, and these heavenly beings, to heal you of the mental suffering you've gone through?

My Reply: Yes, because

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

they don't seem to care about me, and allow me to suffer.

Other Person's Response: Even if god wasn't allowing your suffering for a good reason, you would, at least, have gained something by trying to help ease your mental suffering through therapy. You would've gained the benefits certain therapeutic methods offer, such as having more control over your thoughts and emotions, learning relaxing exercises, etc.

My Reply: Again, all that mental suffering wasn't worth obtaining these benefits. It would be like earning a crumb after having gone through years of mental turmoil.

Other Person's Response: I think god, and these heavenly beings, inspire scientists to create cures.

My Reply: There's no need for them to do that when they already have the power to instantly heal people of all illnesses and forms of suffering. But, since they're not healing anybody, then I don't think they're inspiring scientists either. So, they just don't care about humanity, and don't intervene.

Other Person's Response: What about people with healing abilities who can heal people of illnesses?

My Reply: There's still no need for god, and these heavenly beings, to bestow healing abilities upon certain people, when they have the power to heal people themselves.

Other Person's Response: It could be the case that healing abilities are fake, and many people believe this crap.

My Reply: You could be right, which means people, such as spiritual healers, don't really have these healing abilities. But, if they do, then such abilities might be a natural phenomenon, and not a divine gift that's been bestowed by god, or heavenly beings.

Other Person's Response:

It seems to me they don't care about humanity, and they allow anything to happen. They don't intervene, and they just allow life to play out.

Adversity breeds invention. If there was no adversity, wouldn't you just sit back and enjoy the ride? The cure is reached through the struggle to attain knowledge. Cure is the goal. Suffering is not. Have you noticed, when a disease is cured, that a new disease pops up from somewhere? The next lesson continues moving us forward. God has placed a limit on pain. The body goes into shock when it reaches a certain level.

So many times in life, we don't get life as we want it. Our narrow view sometimes brings us to focus on one thing, rather than the Big Picture. Furthermore, this world contains many many people learning their lessons. The dynamics of it all are amazing. There is a lot to consider. As I see it, God will give a person anything, unless it interferes with their lessons, or the lessons of another. Adapt, learn, grow.

If we can't have something, go for something we can have, or get someone else something they need. The possibilities are limitless. If a singer can no longer sing, perhaps she can create music making sound. Perhaps she can advance computer generated singing. The avenues of creating are moved. But, there's always a way to move forward in some way. Who said anyone should give up? Not here, my friend. Life is about living, and forward is the only way.

My Reply: I consider what's the better, loving solution an all-loving god would implement. Would it really be the better, loving solution to allow humanity to go through this whole process of suffering and finding cures? Or, would it be the better, loving solution for god to just instantly heal those in need of healing? I think the latter solution is the better, loving one. Especially considering there are miserable people who are suicidal for many years, even with ongoing treatment, and are in need of mental healing.

Also, in regards to goals and dreams, if that singer permanently lost her voice, she might not have any interest in creating music. Sure, she might find an interest in doing another hobby. But, her singing hobby might always be the one hobby she has most interest in, and sees as the most beautiful. Now, she can no longer pursue that hobby, since god won't heal her voice. As a matter of fact, it could be an even worse scenario. She might not have an interest in any other hobby, no matter how much she tries other hobbies, and her singing hobby is the one and only hobby she has interest in.

Other Person's Response: Could you show me an example of someone who thinks like you (i.e. someone who thinks this Earthly existence is pointless, that there are pointless forms of suffering, and that it would be better if all souls remained in heaven)?

My Reply: Sure. It's an entire topic I'll link you to. The person who made this topic, on a spiritual forum, isn't me. It's someone who sort of has the same views as me:

Why Are We Even Here? - Spiritual Forums

Other Person's Response: I heard there are spiritual beings, such as Jesters, and Machine Elves. Perhaps they're pranksters, who play a cruel joke on us, by having souls be here on Earth, where they go through pointless forms of suffering, and have to reincarnate on Earth many times.

My Reply: That could be.

Other Person's Response: There are many people with amazing talents, and great goals to achieve, only to find themselves in a position where they lose everything. For example, a person can have an amazing singing voice, but permanently lose his voice. If you listened to the song "In the End" by Linkin Park, you'll get the idea. This says to me life's a cruel joke.

My Reply: I agree.

Other Person's Response: You say your miserable struggles were a pointless waste of your life, and nothing more. Well, I think you writing all these packets is just a pointless waste of your life, and nothing more.

My Reply: I don't think so. I think it's material well worth sharing.

Other Person's Response: I'm just curious. Were you really waiting for god, or these heavenly beings, to heal you of this misery-inducing worry you've had?

My Reply: No. If god, and these beings, do exist, then I knew they wouldn't heal me, even though I do think they should've healed me. So, I was really waiting for my brain to fully recover on its own. I gave up after trying some things to help speed up my recovery process, since it just wasn't working for me. Especially since my therapist is telling me that the best thing I can do is to focus on my daily activities, and allow the worry to resolve on its own over time (i.e. to just let my brain fully recover on its own). But, perhaps I shouldn't give up so easily, and see if there's something more that can be done for me.

Other Person's Response: The goal of meditation is to help relax your mind, which would get you to a state of full recovery faster, so that you have your joy back to you again, and no longer have to be in a state of suffering any longer. So, meditation would offer you a form of spiritual growth, which would be to overcome your suffering. But, even if you didn't do meditation, and allowed your psyche to fully recover on its own, that's still a form of spiritual growth, since you're still overcoming your suffering.

My Reply: I think it would be better if I didn't have such suffering to begin with. That way, there'd be no horrible, miserable state to recover from.

Other Person's Response: I think you'll look back and see just how necessary and worthwhile your miserable struggles were. I think it was worth going through all that suffering, and people often times look back at their struggles, and come to realize just how beautiful they really were.

My Reply: I don't think that will ever be the case with me.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your hedonistic philosophy, the astral plane (the plane corresponding to the emotional body) is considered as the plane of duality. It is, therefore, difficult to only feel positive emotions without also feeling so-called negative emotions. The yogic path teaches the cultivation of emotional serenity, so that we become free from all emotions.

This does not make us cold and uncaring. Qualities, such as love, compassion, joy, and humor, are not considered as emotional states. Instead, these are seen as qualities of the Soul, or Consciousness. When the emotional body is serene and still, then these Soul qualities can be expressed without distortion.

I would suggest that consciousness is beyond all intellect and emotions. The qualities of beauty, joy, love, compassion, etc. arise spontaneously out of consciousness. These qualities may be reflected on an intellectual and emotional level. But, these are just reflections.

My Reply: If that's the case, then I'd need a new personal experience to convince me that my emotions aren't the only way I can experience beauty, joy, love, horror, disgust, tragedy, etc. Who knows, it could be the case that these qualities are being ruled and dictated by my emotions. This means that, for me, I really am experiencing these qualities through my emotions, and have yet to experience them through my Soul, or Consciousness. After all, I need to experience these qualities somehow, someway to give my life beauty, joy, greatness, etc. My current way of experiencing them would be through my emotions.

Other Person's Response: Do you think your miserable struggles were not only pointless, but unnecessary?

My Reply: Yes. It would be like having unnecessary grime on a nice vehicle. The grime was meant to be removed, just as how all my misery was meant to be removed out of my life. It would be better off if that vehicle remained polished and clean, and never had any grime on it to begin with, just as how it would be better off if I never had those miserable struggles to begin with.

Other Person's Response: If your philosophy is correct, and the goal in life should be to live the happiest life we can, then having misery really is like unnecessary grime. It just doesn't belong.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: So, you treat your miserable struggles as being an aspect of your being, and existence, to be eradicated?

My Reply: Yes. I need to become a beautiful, joyful being of light who lives a beautiful, joyful existence.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: You say there are specific worries and thoughts that caused you to be miserable. But, other than that, do you feel stress and misery from other thoughts and worries that people normally have, such as work that needs to be done, chores, etc.

My Reply: No. As a matter of fact, I don't have other worries and negative thoughts besides those specific ones I've had, which means those are really the only negative thoughts and worries I had that caused me stress and misery. An example of one of them would be my worry in regards to near death experiences. I talk about it in this packet. It was a devastating worry for me.

Other Person's Response: During your miserable struggles, do things that are normally beautiful to people become horrible, tragic, disturbing, etc. to you, and cause you nightmares?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Could you give me an example of something that's normally beautiful to people, causing you nightmares?

My Reply: Sure. I was listening to a Buddhist mantra that's said to ease mental suffering, so I could ease the worry I was having. There's a woman with a lovely singing voice, and the mantra is supposed to be beautiful. But, it caused me nightmares when I listened to it while asleep. I even felt horror from it in the middle of the night, when I woke up during my sleep. But, I'm still listening to it anyway because, who knows, it might speed up my recovery. However, when I listen to this mantra throughout the day, it doesn't cause me to feel horror, or any other negative emotion.

Since I'm close to a full recovery, then I actually feel a bit of beauty and relaxation from it when I'm awake during the day. So, my positive emotions are starting to slowly return, since I'm feeling that way a bit. But, again, when I listen to it while sleeping, it causes me nightmares. I heard the mantra in one of my nightmares, and it was a horrific experience for me. If this worry were to be all gone completely, then I'm quite sure listening to the mantra would give me beautiful, peaceful dreams.

Other Person's Response: I, myself, have felt horror on many occasions, and I love that feeling! Horror is a very positive experience for me!

My Reply: No. Horror is still a negative experience. It can only be the positive emotions you feel from the horror that are the positive experiences for you. Feeling love (a positive emotion) is also the only way you can love your feeling of horror.

Other Person's Response: For me, positive emotions can be negative experiences. When I feel attraction towards that gal working out, it's embarrassing, and I become ashamed.

My Reply: That feeling of attraction was still a positive experience for you. But, feeling that positive emotion then made you feel a negative emotion, which would be that feeling of shame and embarrassment. That negative emotion was the negative experience for you.

Other Person's Response: You say you sometimes feel beauty and relaxation in regards to this mantra. Do you also sometimes feel like the song is meaningless noise, due to this misery-inducing worry of yours, rendering things in your life morbidly stripped of any experience of beauty, joy, and greatness?

My Reply: Yes. As a matter of fact, this is how I mostly feel about the mantra as of now. But, like I said, over time, that misery fades more and more at a very slow, gradual rate, since my psyche is recovering on its own at a very slow, gradual rate.

Other Person's Response: During this miserable struggle of yours, is there a negative, morbid thought there, making you perceive songs as meaningless noise, morbidly stripped of beauty and greatness?

My Reply: Yes. That negative thought causes me to feel misery, and it's this misery which is that morbid perception/experience.

Other Person's Response: Are you sure listening to that mantra isn't speeding up your recovery?

My Reply: I don't notice that. But, I'll still keep on listening to it, along with a few other mantras meant for stress, worry, and mental suffering. Just so you know, I also listened to those mantras, too. But, I didn't notice anything. So, I'll just keep listening to them, in addition to the other mantra.

Other Person's Response: If the mantra really does work, then does it have to be beautiful to a person in order for it to work? Or, can a person be in a very hopeless state, where everything in his life, including the mantra, is morbidly empty and meaningless to him, but the mantra still works to heal his mental despair?

My Reply: I'm not sure.

Other Person's Response: I think there are healing sound frequencies you can listen to, which are claimed to ease stress and worry. I think they're called the Solfeggio frequencies.

My Reply: I have listened to them. But, I didn't notice a faster recovery from this worry. I'll still listen to them anyway.

Other Person's Response: In regards to this worry of yours, and using methods to help recover from it, I think you should be using methods that have been known to work in both a purely naturalistic worldview (a worldview that says this is the only life we have), and a spiritual worldview (a worldview that says we're souls who live on in the afterlife). For example, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has been known to work, according to both skeptics, and spiritual believers.

But, if you just use methods that spiritual believers think work, but skeptics think are woo/bull ****, then you might be using methods that don't work, since this might be the only life there is. That means you shouldn't be using methods, such as Solfeggio frequencies, since this is something only spiritual believers think works. You also shouldn't be using methods that skeptics think work, but spiritual believers don't.

My Reply: Since I'm undecided on the existence of the afterlife, then I'm taking your advice, since it's the wise thing to do.

Other Person's Response: When you do fully recover from this misery-inducing worry, and have your joy back to you, are you still going to do Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?

My Reply: No, because I don't need to. Neither would I need to do meditation. Once I'm fully recovered from this worry, I don't think I'll have anymore misery. So, I'll be just fine.

Other Person's Response: But, I think Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and meditation can help change your philosophy.

My Reply: I'm not sure about this one. But, as long as I have my positive emotions intact, I wouldn't need to change my philosophy anyway.

Other Person's Response: The very fact you've never tried to change your philosophy must mean you were able to constantly enjoy your life and hobbies.

My Reply: That's correct. That means, many years ago, I was a very lucky person, since I hardly had any stress in my life, and there was nothing else that took my positive emotions away. That's how I lived my life for many years. Some people are lucky like that. They get to have all the happiness, or riches in the world, and nothing takes it away from them. But, later on in my life, I struggled with much misery, and that took my positive emotions away.

During these struggles, I didn't know what to do or who to turn to. My medication didn't help me, which means I really didn't know what to do at that point. Especially since my mother isn't that smart, and only gives ordinary advice. But, I later saw a therapist who doesn't really help me (although, he's a very kind person). So, I've just gotten through these miserable struggles on my own. This recent struggle was the worst of them all.

Other Person's Response: There are many people who are unlucky, since positive emotions are very fleeting for them. So, I'm surprised you were one of the lucky ones.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: As a person continues to suffer more and more misery by his own negative thoughts and worries, eventually, he no longer has anymore misery-inducing thoughts or worries.

My Reply: Yes. I eventually learned, on my own, to stop having those negative thoughts and worries if I want to live the happy life I used to live. My struggles have also taught me a lot about just how precious happiness is, and I'm sharing these teachings in my packets.

Other Person's Response: Your predicament would be like a rich person, losing his riches, just to learn how important it is to be rich, and learning that being rich is the only thing that makes life good and beautiful. That wasn't the life lesson he was supposed to learn. You've learned just how important happiness is, after having lost your happiness, and you've learned that happiness is the only thing that makes life good and beautiful. So, I don't think you've learned the right lesson either.

My Reply: But, I've learned to stop having negative thoughts and worries in order to prevent further suffering, and I think that was the right life lesson to learn. Even Buddhists talk about eradicating suffering.

Other Person's Response: If a person loses his riches, then not only is he supposed to be accepting of his loss, but he should find himself transformed as an individual. He should become selfless, giving, and no longer concerned about being rich. So, when you've lost your positive emotions, you should've been accepting of your loss, and transformed as an individual.

My Reply: Sometimes, it can be the case that a rich person becomes accepting of his loss of riches, but is still self-centered, and wishes to seek riches. So, it's possible for a person to reach the stage of acceptance, but not the stage of transformation. As for me, if I were to lose my positive emotions, I'd be accepting of that, and I'd try to find ways to restore them. If there's more positivity to life than positive emotions, and I just haven't experienced it, then it seems I haven't transformed as an individual. Also, my struggles haven't made me selfless and giving. They were just horrible struggles I endured to the very end.

Other Person's Response: When you have miserable struggles that are triggered by devastating worries and negative thoughts, you're not accepting of that, are you?

My Reply: I'm not accepting of that. At least when I'm apathetic, I just don't care about anything. But, those miserable struggles are a state of mental turmoil, and I won't accept that.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: If you were apathetic, then you wouldn't even have the desire to regain your positive emotions.

My Reply: That's right. But, I'd still choose to try to regain them anyway.

Other Person's Response: As time goes on, you recover more and more from this misery-inducing worry. Not only should you recover more as time progresses, but your rate of recovery should speed up because, when you're very miserable at first, your brain is in a very horrible, unhealthy state. Thus, your rate of recovery will be slow. Other functions will also be slow, such as your ability to think, concentrate, etc. But, as time goes on, those functions should speed up, along with your rate of recovery.

My Reply: Although I've noticed an improvement in my ability to think, make sense of things, etc. as time goes on, I haven't noticed my rate of recovery speeding up. It seems I'm just recovering at the same, slow, gradual rate.

Other Person's Response:

Well, I think I'm a decent human being just the way I am, which means god should see me as worthy of being healed/assisted.

God only helps those who help themselves. If you're going to stick in your mentality rut (this is a mentality. Not spirituality, by the way), then God thinks you're enjoying it there because you're not doing anything about it. If you always do what you've always done, you'll only get what you've always got.

My Reply: Like I said, I was trying to find ways to help ease this misery-inducing worry of mine. But, nothing helped me, and my therapist is unable to help me. So, I had to let my psyche fully recover on its own, and it was a long time to wait. Also, god is an all-knowing being, which means he'd know I'm not enjoying being stuck in that pit of misery, and he'd know everything about me, including all my thoughts, my inner turmoil, and that I was expecting him to heal me. I can't enjoy anything without my feelings of joy anyway (which were shut off during this whole miserable struggle).

In regards to god only helping those who help themselves, it would be unloving for god to not heal me of this worry, even if I wasn't trying to find ways to help myself. An all-loving god would see that I'm suffering, need healing, and instantly heal me, regardless if I was trying to help myself or not. Also, there are plenty of suicidal and miserable people out there who need mental healing, but think it's hopeless to even try to help themselves, and they've given up, and think nothing will help them. So, an all-loving god would understand this, and heal these people anyway. Yet, he doesn't, which means he doesn't exist, or he's not all-loving.

Other Person's Response: You say your therapist is unable to help you, and is just letting you wait until your psyche fully recovers on its own. Personally, I think you've been waiting way too long, and that something needs to be done to get you to that state of full recovery you need to be in.

My Reply: I agree.

Other Person's Response: The heavenly beings are also all-knowing beings, aren't they?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Perhaps god, and these heavenly beings, are all-knowing beings, but aren't all-loving beings.

My Reply: That could be (if they even exist).

Other Person's Response: If you meet god, and these heavenly beings, after the death of your physical body, what if they say something you don't like, such as that they didn't have to cater to you by ensuring your happiness, and healing you of this misery-inducing worry you've had?

My Reply: Then I'd slaughter them, since I'd have nothing but hate for them. If they allowed me to go through pointless, unnecessary suffering, and they just didn't want to heal me, then they're not innocent, all-loving beings in my eyes. If I slaughter them, then that would prevent them from sending me to Earth again in a new human body. I don't want to be on Earth again, since, like I said, it's an unhappy place to be, and there's much suffering. Therefore, I'd choose to remain in heaven, where I can have all the joy I want.

Other Person's Response: I agree god, and these heavenly beings, would need to be slaughtered because their plan and purpose for you goes against your desire to live a life of happiness. Life's all about the positive experiences (positive emotions), as you said earlier. So, by them sending you to Earth again and again, they're just sending you back to an unhappy place.

Furthermore, if you have miserable struggles again when you reincarnate into a new human body, god, and these heavenly beings, would allow you to suffer, and wouldn't heal you. If, under any circumstance, you lose your positive emotions, god, and these heavenly beings, won't restore them for you.

Who knows, you could reincarnate into a human body, and that body has a brain with a depressive illness. You might struggle with that depression much of your life, and be driven to suicide, just like so many other folks out there who struggle with clinical depression. So, to me, it seems god, and these heavenly beings, are doing you a major disservice.

My Reply: I agree, and there are many mental illnesses that can take away positive emotions. That means there'd be many human bodies I'd reincarnate into that would lose their positive emotions, due to mental illnesses.

Other Person's Response: There are people who struggle with treatment resistant depression, since no treatment works for them. People also struggle with a chronic absence of positive emotions, and no treatment seems to help them either.

My Reply: You're right.

Other Person's Response: Once you're fully recovered from this misery-inducing worry, that means you should no longer feel negative emotions, such as misery or rage. So, even if god, and these heavenly beings, are doing you a major disservice, you'd no longer feel enraged about that.

My Reply: That's right. But, I'd still slaughter them, even if I was feeling happy. Like I said, I can still make certain choices, regardless of how I feel. That's why I'd still choose to slaughter them, even if I no longer felt angry at them.

Other Person's Response: I see you think it's cruel and unjust for god, and these heavenly beings, to have allowed you to suffer so much. If your soul meets them in heaven after the death of your physical body, then you should only harm them if you're absolutely sure they're your enemies. But, if they are allies, who've allowed you to go through all that suffering for a very good reason, then don't harm them.

My Reply: Understood. Many people see them as enemies, since they allow so much suffering. They could be right. Or, maybe, these people just have a huge misunderstanding.

Other Person's Response: You said god is an all-loving being, and that we receive his light through our positive thoughts and beliefs, which allows us to experience his light in the form of positive emotions. Perhaps it would be your own personal light received and experienced, since god clearly isn't an all-loving being, and he's doing you a major disservice.

My Reply: You could be right.

Other Person's Response: How would you slaughter god though? He's just a ball of light, or an invisible being.

My Reply: I'm not sure. But, if god's not an actual being, and he's just a ball of light, then there'd be no need to feel angry at god, or slaughter him, since it would be no different than me being angry at water, and slamming my fists into that water.

Other Person's Response: Not only are there heavenly beings, but there are hellish beings. These hellish beings bring bad karma into our lives, and they bring so much hate and suffering into this world, all the while remaining unseen. Maybe that's why you've had so many miserable struggles. So, you should really slaughter these hellish beings, rather than the heavenly beings.

My Reply: I'd slaughter both. I'd slaughter the hellish beings for having brought so much suffering into my life, and I'd slaughter the heavenly beings for allowing me to go through all that suffering, and having me sent to Earth.

Other Person's Response: I realize it was your own unhealthy thoughts that brought all that misery upon you. But, perhaps there were hellish beings at work as well, bringing the situations into your life that would trigger your misery. For example, if someone had the thought in his mind that losing his loved one would be the most devastating thing, then these hellish beings might try to find ways to kill his loved one, just to devastate him. Perhaps these beings would cause bad karma, which would create a situation where a serial killer comes in, and kills the loved one.

My Reply: Yes. In regards to this devastating worry of mine, I first had the idea in my mind that it would be horrible if I experienced something worse than those crippled nightmare states, while in a fully lucid state. I later read up on near death experiences, since I was wanting to have hope in the afterlife.

But, I read about hellish near death experiences, and that's the moment I became devastated, since people have horrible trips, where they experience something much worse than even their worst nightmares. They have these experiences in a hyper lucid state.

So, perhaps it was these beings bringing bad karma into my life, which created a situation where I read up on hellish near death experiences, which then devastated me. That means it was a trap I fell right into. I fell into a trap of mental agony and despair, and remained there for quite some time.

Other Person's Response: In regards to therapeutic methods, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, maybe none of these methods would've helped this misery-inducing worry, since your predicament was such a severe case. So, you might've had no choice but to let your psyche recover on its own.

My Reply: That could be. I really don't know. My brain was tightly jammed (stuck) on the worry 24/7 everyday, since it was such a horrible worry, and I'm not sure any therapeutic method could help something as severe as this. Even though I've read that CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) has worked for many people, and hasn't worked for some people, I'm not sure if it would work for me.

Other Person's Response: Well, I'm glad you discovered CBT. Perhaps you could use it.

My Reply: Yes.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: CBT is meant for average people who wish to replace unhealthy thoughts with healthy ones. I'm not sure it would work for people in severe predicaments, such as those who've suffered from an emotional trauma. Your misery-inducing worry was a devastating worry for you, it emotionally traumatized you, and your subconscious mind has a powerful, firm grip on that worry, since it's such a troubling worry. So, I'm not sure CBT would work for you.

My Reply: Perhaps you're right.

Other Person's Response: If CBT doesn't work for you, then that leaves you with another option, which would be meditation. That will help calm down that chronically active worry response in your brain. Meditation should get you to a full recovery faster than just waiting this whole thing out.

My Reply: Thanks for the tip!

Other Person's Response: Mindfulness meditation just shifts your conscious focus on the present moment. But, you've already been consciously focusing on your daily activities, and other things during your entire recovery time (which was about 3 years), which means I'd consider that to be its own form of mindfulness. Yet, subconsciously, your brain still remains firmly stuck on this misery-inducing worry, and it's still taking you an extremely long time to recover from it. So, I'm not sure mindfulness would help you, since it doesn't matter how much you consciously focus on other things, whether it be the present moment, your daily activities, etc. It's not going to speed up your recovery one bit.

My Reply: Perhaps you're right. So, maybe, consciously focusing on other things doesn't help me at all, and it just was my psyche recovering on its own that was easing this misery-inducing worry over time.

Other Person's Response: I get what you're saying. It's a long route to get to that state of joy again, and you're wondering why god, and these heavenly beings, are allowing you to take that long route, when they could just instantly heal your mind.

My Reply: Exactly. Also, I did discover a therapy, known as TRE (Trauma Release Exercise), which uses tremors to ease the mind of stress, worry, and psychological distress. So, instead of me having to tremor my way to a full recovery (if this therapy even works for me), god, or these heavenly beings, could've instantly healed my mind. It seems unnecessary and absurd for me to go through all that.

Other Person's Response: I think you'd need to see a professional who specializes in TRE, and that might cost you a lot of money.

My Reply: My mother doesn't have that money. So, perhaps I could just watch youtube videos on how I can perform this therapy on myself. You can't just tremor. There are specific steps to follow. If you don't follow them exactly, then it won't work.

Other Person's Response: If god, or these heavenly beings, instantly healed the minds of those with psychological distress, then that would save these people a lot of time and money. They wouldn't need to spend any money on therapies, and commit so much time and effort.

My Reply: Exactly. There are many people who go through the frustrating trial and error process of finding what therapy works for them, and it would save them all that frustration if their minds could just be healed instantly. Not only that, there are many therapists who don't do a good job, and don't care that much about the patients.

Other Person's Response: Does this worry of yours naturally cause you to tremor?

My Reply: No. Since I don't feel any anxiety or panic from this worry, then I don't have any nervous tremors. This worry just causes me other negative emotions besides anxiety and panic, such as misery, rage, disgust, etc.

Other Person's Response: When trying any therapeutic method to help yourself, whether it be CBT, meditation, TRE, etc., you must be good at following instructions, understanding things, remembering things, and doing certain tasks.

My Reply: That's my weak point though. Normally, I don't feel frustration and rage when I have a difficult time understanding something, remembering something, following instructions, or when I don't do something right. But, during an emotional crisis, I feel extreme, violent rage about this, and I feel the desire to give up right then and there on these therapeutic methods. So, perhaps it's best I find something that can ease my mind that's not going to make me feel rage. Perhaps there's some relaxing music I can listen to that would ease my worry over time. Listening to music doesn't require me to understand any material, follow instructions, remember things, or be good at doing certain tasks. I can just sit back and listen.

Other Person's Response: Are you saying you're not going to try CBT, meditation, or any other therapeutic method, since they're demanding tasks that would make you feel rage?

My Reply: Yes. Since that worry is there, making me feel all sorts of negative emotions, then I'd feel rage when trying these methods. Again, I can't help but feel this extreme rage and desire to give up when I'm having a devastating worry in my life.

Other Person's Response: So, even though you're near a full recovery, you still feel rage, due to this worry still being there?

My Reply: Yes. Once it's gone, I don't think I'll feel any rage.

Other Person's Response: I heard you have autism, and that you had delayed speech when you was a child. Having this mental disability would certainly make it difficult for you when it comes to demanding tasks, such as CBT, meditation, etc.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I don't think there's anything else that's really going to help ease this worry besides those therapeutic methods. It's a severe, devastating worry, and listening to relaxing music simply isn't going to help it.

My Reply: Then god, and these heavenly beings, should see that I've given up on those therapeutic methods, and they should instantly heal my mind of this worry.

Other Person's Response: When you feel rage, that will certainly make it much more difficult for you to understand things, remember things, follow instructions, etc. Not only that, but you'll find yourself giving up, when you shouldn't be giving up. So, perhaps you could do those therapeutic methods in such a way that doesn't bring you rage. Perhaps you could just think to yourself that it doesn't matter if you don't get things right the first time because everyone fails, and it takes practice.

My Reply: When I wish to achieve something, but am not achieving it, then that causes me to feel rage during a devastating moment in my life. Again, normally, that wouldn't make me feel any rage. But, maybe I can have the thought of having no desire to achieve anything. That way, when I fail, that won't make me feel rage. So, perhaps I can try to follow instructions in regards to any therapeutic method, but have the thought of not caring if I achieve or fail. Also, you're right when you say that having rage makes it more difficult for me to understand things, remember things, etc. I find that, when my mind is at ease, I'm able to understand things, remember things, etc. much better.

Other Person's Response: You've given up on your hobbies, since you don't have your positive emotions. So, you might as well spend all your time trying to find ways to help ease this worry, so your positive emotions can be restored. For example, if meditation really is what could help you best, then you might as well spend all your time meditating, until you reach that state of joy you need to be in.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: When doing therapeutic methods, is it easier for you to do physical exercises, such as following instructions in regards to TRE, which instructs you to stretch, bend over, etc.? Or, is it easier for you to do mental exercises, such as following instructions on mindfulness meditation, which instructs you to visualize, focus on the present, etc.?

My Reply: It's easier for me to do physical exercises.

Other Person's Response: I realize it's a very long wait for you to fully recover from this misery-inducing worry. Do you wish you could just go unconscious, and remain that way for as long as you wish, so you could wake up many months later, or however much longer you need to wait to fully recover? That way, you wouldn't have to experience all this waiting, and you could just be unconscious during that whole time.

My Reply: I wish I could do that. That would allow me to wake up one day, fully recovered. I'd prefer a dreamless, unconscious state, since I don't want to have any nightmares from this worry.

Other Person's Response: Perhaps you just need more control over your thoughts and emotions. Maybe this will give you a better philosophy to live by, and give you positive experiences, even during moments of worry.

My Reply: Well, I've been choosing to not act out on my feelings, whether they be rage or misery. I just bore through them. So, I was exhibiting some control over them. Still, that did nothing to change my philosophy, or allow me to have positive experiences during this devastating worry.

Other Person's Response: I think you should allow yourself to feel all those negative emotions that result from this worry, such as misery, rage, disgust, etc. By resisting those emotions, you're only prolonging your recovery time. So, the more you allow yourself to feel those emotions, the quicker you should reach a full recovery. Here's a video, which explains:

My Reply: I am allowing myself to feel all those negative emotions, just as how I did with all my other miserable struggles. It only took a few months to recover from all those other miserable struggles and emotional traumas. But, it's taking over 3 years to fully recover from this emotional crisis.

Other Person's Response: As you recover more and more from this misery-inducing worry, if a person were to ask you how you're doing, that's really no different than asking how's your perspective doing because, when we talk about how well your mind is doing, that's the same thing as talking about how well your perspective is. If you're having a morbid perspective, then that says your mind is still not

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

doing well. But, if you have a joyful perspective, then that says your mind is doing well. If you're having an apathetic perspective, then that says you're nearing a state of joy, but not quite there yet.

My Reply: I agree, and I'm nearing a state of joy.

Other Person's Response: I heard this misery-inducing worry has caused you to feel many horrible, negative emotions all throughout the day each day for almost 3 years, and that these negative emotions have slowly subsided over the course of that time. It's possible you'll get to the point where you'll eventually no longer feel any negative emotions whatsoever from this worry, such as misery, rage, etc. But, just because those negative emotions are no longer there, doesn't mean your brain is no longer stuck on that worry. So, that worry could still be there, keeping your positive emotions shut off.

My Reply: That's possible. My subconscious mind could still remain worried, even though all those negative emotions are completely gone. In which case, I'd have to take the advice of others, and try CBT, to try to ease the worry, so my positive emotions return. I'd try other methods as well if CBT doesn't really help me.

As of now, all those negative emotions are almost completely gone, since I'm nearing a full recovery. It's only a matter of time before I find out if my positive emotions return, once all those negative emotions are completely gone, or if my positive emotions still remain shut off. If they still remain shut off, it could actually have nothing to do with the worry still being there.

It might be the case I've developed a mental condition known as "anhedonia" (an absence of positive emotions). In which case, no therapy would help to restore my positive emotions, since therapy is meant for people who struggle with negative thoughts and worries. But, I wouldn't be having that worry anymore.

Other Person's Response: A person will always remain unskilled at drawing, as long as he doesn't try to improve. Likewise, your philosophy will always remain the same, as long as you don't try to improve.

My Reply: I'd try if it's necessary to change my philosophy. But, I can't promise it would change.

Other Person's Response: I don't think you ever had a philosophy, since it's nothing but nonsense.

My Reply: Even if it is nonsense, I'm not sure it can ever change.

Other Person's Response: If there are better values you can live your life by, but your philosophy can never change, since you remain unenlightened to the truth that these better values are real values, then I think it would be the fault of god, and these heavenly beings, for not enlightening you to this truth.

My Reply: Yes. But, even if I was enlightened to this truth, I'm not sure if that would be enough to change my philosophy. So, even if I was enlightened to the truth that positive and negative emotions aren't the only way to have positive and negative experiences, I'm not sure if that would be enough to change my philosophy.

Other Person's Response: If a suicidal, miserable person thought nothing could help him, and he had a discussion with others, then these people would tell him there's help out there. So, it would be his fault if he still doesn't seek out that help.

My Reply: But, if he's still convinced nothing could help him, even after having that discussion, then it's not his fault if he doesn't get that help. It would be like if someone was convinced that psychics are frauds. If that person/skeptic was still convinced of this, even after having a discussion with spiritual believers, then it's not his fault if he doesn't invest some of his time in a seance (a meeting where people contact the dead). To him, it's not even worth bothering with. So, it also wouldn't be the fault of that suicidal, miserable person for thinking it's not even worth bothering getting the help he needs.

Other Person's Response: There are some suicidal, miserable people out there who do gain a very small benefit from therapy, medication, and other methods. But, it's not much, they end up giving up, and thinking it's hopeless to try anything else.

My Reply: Exactly. That's my point.

Other Person's Response: Since there are suicidal, miserable people out there who try their best to better themselves, but nothing seems to work, this means god, and these heavenly beings, are just allowing them to suffer like this.

My Reply: Yes, and I see no reason to allow these people to suffer.

Other Person's Response: Perhaps nothing would work to help ease this worry for you, or change your philosophy. But, if something would work to ease this worry, then it might be of very little benefit.

My Reply: You could be right. Especially considering how severe this worry is. That means nothing would work to change my life for the better. As a matter of fact, this is how I feel right now, and that feeling would be a negative emotion. I feel this way because this worry I'm having triggers all sorts of negative emotions.

Other Person's Response: When you have these miserable struggles, that makes you feel like giving up on trying things that would help you, since you feel like said things won't help you, or will have very little benefit. So, I think it would be better if you was apathetic, rather than miserable, because you don't feel that way. You just don't care about anything, which would make it easier for you to get the help you need. Sure, it wouldn't be as easy as feeling positively motivated to get help, since you'd have to drag yourself out of bed, and do the things you don't feel up to doing, including getting the help you need. But, at least you wouldn't feel any negative emotions that would make matters much more difficult.

My Reply: I agree.

Other Person's Response: There are suicidal people who feel like giving up getting the help they need, not only because nothing seems to be working, but because it would take too long for them to achieve their goal of getting where they need to be. Life should be a challenge that's experienced as good, beautiful, and amazing. It shouldn't be a challenge where people are in situations where they feel miserable, suicidal, and feel like giving up.

My Reply: I agree. Having such negative feelings makes it much more difficult for someone to persevere in trying to achieve his goals, since that feeling is a negative experience/perspective.

Other Person's Response: You say nothing would work to ease this worry. But, there's one thing that's already working for you, and it's your brain's ability to recover from it on its own.

My Reply: Yes. But, that's a recovery process that's taking an extremely long time, and I hope there's something that would speed up my recovery.

Other Person's Response: I think life should be about the individual's desires. Since your desire is to live a happy life, and since said desire isn't harming anyone else, then you should be allowed to live a happy life. You shouldn't have to suffer like this.

My Reply: I agree. I have my rights as a human being, which means I have the right to be happy. I could say the same thing about my mother. My mother's desire is to be rich, she shouldn't have to be poor like this, and her desire to be rich isn't going to harm anyone else. As a matter of fact, it would be beneficial, since she'd be buying the things I want, the things she wants, and she'd be giving money to poor, innocent people.

She has the right to be rich, which means god, or these heavenly beings, should've made this Earthly existence a rich paradise for her, and a happy paradise for me. I realize my mother said she wants money, and that she doesn't need happiness. But, I'd ask her to think twice about that because I think money without happiness is no way to live.

Without the individual's happiness, then money can be nothing positive in the eyes of that individual. My mother said she does have clinical depression, and perhaps she should get treatment for it. Hopefully, said treatment works for her. That way, she can enjoy any money she manages to get.

Other Person's Response: Not only would your mother being rich be beneficial, but you being happy would also be beneficial, since you'd be taking up composing right now, and wouldn't be giving up on it.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: If, let's pretend, you could never recover from this misery-inducing worry, and you had to live with said misery, then it would be best to end your life. It would be like having an abominable monster that's stuck on you. To destroy the monster (the misery-inducing worry), you'd need to sacrifice yourself along with it, since there's nothing that can get rid of it.

My Reply: Fortunately, that's not going to be the case, since my psyche is recovering from this misery-inducing worry on its own.

Other Person's Response: In regards to this worry, you're taking medication for it, right?

My Reply: Yes. But, I don't notice any benefit from the medication.

Other Person's Response: In regards to suicide, if a person ended his life, since he couldn't get rich, then that means he's given up on life. He's even given up on his selfish desire to being rich.

My Reply: Sure, he's given up on life. But, I think he'd still have that selfish desire to be rich, and he just ended his life, since he wasn't getting the money he wanted.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your mother's clinical depression, if she couldn't feel happiness and joy about earning money, but could feel other positive emotions, such as pride and beauty, then she could still be proud about earning money, and see beauty in that.

My Reply: Yes. As for me, I need to enjoy my composing. If I'm just proud, and see my composing as beautiful, then that's not enough. I need that feeling of enjoyment, which is a form of motivation that urges me to compose awesome music.

Other Person's Response: I heard your mother has money issues, since she's poor. She's been trying her best to earn more money. But, nothing is working for her. So, why does god, and these heavenly beings, allow her to be poor like this? They should make money magically appear out of thin air for her, since they have the power to do this.

My Reply: I agree.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: God could've sent someone to make your mother rich, if he couldn't make money magically appear out of thin air for her.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: So, you don't just blame god, and these heavenly beings, because of your suffering? You also blame them for the suffering of others, such as your mother's life of poverty?

My Reply: Yes. They could've healed my suffering, and they could've made my mother rich instantly, since they have the power.

Other Person's Response: Perhaps your mother is having negative thoughts, and it's these thoughts that are bringing her bad luck/karma. Maybe that's why she's not earning the money she needs.

My Reply: If that's true, then how's she supposed to know that? She'd be bringing bad karma upon herself unknowingly, and it wouldn't be her fault. It would instead be god's fault for not giving her the knowledge that she's bringing bad karma upon herself. As for my miserable struggles, it was obvious to me that it was my own negative thoughts and worries that brought all that misery upon myself. But, as for my mother's predicament, there's no way for her to know that she's bringing bad karma upon herself.

Other Person's Response: Spiritual believers always talk about how having negative beliefs prevents us from getting the things we want. Perhaps your mother is having a negative belief that's preventing her from getting the money she desires (such as the belief that many people hate her, and are spiritually trying to keep her in a pit of poverty through their hate, which would prevent her from ever becoming rich). If she had a positive belief, such as there aren't such people who hate her, that she'll be rich, or that these hateful people have no spiritual power over her, then I bet she'd be having good luck, which might make her rich.

My Reply: If that's the case, then how can she believe otherwise? In order for her to have a positive belief that would give her good karma, she'd have to believe something she doesn't believe in, and it wouldn't be her fault that she can't have this positive belief. For example, let's pretend believing in the existence of fairies would give you good luck, and having the disbelief in fairies would bring you bad luck, then how do you expect someone, who doesn't believe in fairies, to believe? It's not the fault of that person for not believing in fairies. It can only be the fault of god, and these heavenly beings, for not enlightening this person to the existence of fairies, and allowing this person to live a life of bad luck.

Other Person's Response: If spiritual believers are right when they say having negative thoughts and beliefs brings bad karma into our lives, then that means there are plenty of people in this world who are unknowingly bringing bad karma upon themselves.

My Reply: Yes. If there's somehow a way they can change their thoughts and beliefs to bring good karma upon themselves, then they're unaware it's their negative thoughts and beliefs bringing them bad karma in the first place. So, they'd have to address an issue they're unaware needs to be addressed. They'd also be unaware of methods out there that can change one's thoughts and beliefs, since so many people are ignorant in this world. By the way, there are certain thoughts and beliefs that can be changed through certain therapeutic methods. But, there are certain thoughts and beliefs that can't be changed.

Other Person's Response: Is it possible another person can bring bad karma upon someone else by having negative thoughts and beliefs?

My Reply: That might be possible because I thought I heard spiritual believers also say this. Again, the person being inflicted with bad karma might be completely ignorant of this, and the other person might be ignorant as well.

Other Person's Response: Spiritual believers say that misdeeds we've done in a previous life bring bad karma upon us in this lifetime the moment we reincarnate into this lifetime. So, perhaps the reason why your mother is having bad luck when it comes to money is because she has done some misdeeds in a previous life, and is now being punished with bad karma. If she wants good karma, so she can earn a lot of money, then she needs to resolve the cause of her bad karma through past life regression with a therapist. It's where a therapist tries to bring back the memory of who you were, and what you've done, in a previous life.

My Reply: If that's the case, then how's she supposed to know that? I blame god, and these heavenly beings, for not giving her such knowledge, since such knowledge would've been very useful for her. But, if she doesn't believe she's being punished with bad karma, then I also put blame on god, and these heavenly beings, since they could've enlightened her to the truth that she's being punished with bad karma, and she needs to resolve this somehow. As long as they don't enlighten her, then they're allowing her to remain stuck in a pit of poverty.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother believe in reincarnation?

My Reply: No. So, she doesn't believe in this idea that we're punished with bad karma for having done misdeeds in a previous life. But, she does believe in god and the afterlife. She reads the bible, and she's a Christian. However, she doesn't live the Christian life. She thinks that, as long as you're a kind, polite person who doesn't torture, or kill, innocent people and living things, then you'll earn your way into heaven, and that a person doesn't need to refrain from what god considers sinful, such as swearing, using the Lord's name in vain, working on the Sabbath day, etc. I think many Christians today live like this. They just don't live their lives in obedience to the Lord.

Other Person's Response: So, your mother believes in Jesus and the rapture? Does she believe in hell?

My Reply: Yes. She believes that you'll only go to hell if your someone cruel who tortures, or kills, innocent people and living things.

Other Person's Response: Maybe your suffering really was pointless and unnecessary. Yet, god, and these heavenly beings, felt it was the right thing to allow you to go through all that suffering, and not give a damn about you.

My Reply: In which case, they wouldn't be all-loving beings. They'd have to think that way in order to feel that way, and any being who'd think and feel that way wouldn't be an all-loving being.

Other Person's Response: In regards to the topic of suffering, there are forms of suffering that only serve to render people more cruel and hateful. So, there are forms of pointless suffering that serve no benefit for the individual and/or humanity.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: It would be nice if there was a way to end someone's life pain-free and peacefully. That way, people who are going through immense suffering, without any hope, can have their lives ended this way.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I wonder if people reincarnate, and if they have to learn the same life lessons again and again. It would be horrible if you had to go through these miserable struggles again in some other lifetime, just to learn the same life lesson of keeping your thoughts healthy.

My Reply: Yes. It would be absurd and pointless. People shouldn't have to learn the same life lessons if their souls have already learned them in previous lives.

Other Person's Response: If a person gained knowledge, died, and reincarnated as another person, he'd have to learn that knowledge all over again. For example, if I was a professional musician in a previous life, I'd be completely ignorant of musical knowledge in the next life. So, this also says that any life lessons we learn in this life must be learned again in the next life.

My Reply: Like I said, I think that's an absurd and pointless process to go through. It's just a waste of gained knowledge if we lose it before reincarnating.

Other Person's Response: When someone is born, that person is childish and selfish, since he's still a young child. But, he grows up to become a mature adult. When he reincarnates into another human body, he's a child again, and he loses all the maturity, knowledge, and life lessons he's acquired in his previous life.

My Reply: Which means we must relearn things we've lost in previous lives. I don't see the point of that.

Other Person's Response: In this lifetime, you're someone who keeps his body healthy, since you don't do drugs, you exercise, get enough sleep, and eat right. But, if you reincarnate, then you might have a completely different personality. Instead of being a male who keeps his body healthy in this lifetime, you might be a female who destroys her body through drug use in the next lifetime.

My Reply: My form of spiritual growth, in this lifetime, would be keeping myself healthy. But, you're right. If I do reincarnate, I might lose that form of growth in another lifetime. If souls are just going to lose whatever forms of learning and growth they obtain in this lifetime the moment they reincarnate, then that's just an absurd, pointless, and unnecessary spiritual journey for our souls.

Other Person's Response: I heard that, even though your mother strictly encourages you to remain in good, physical health, she didn't strictly encourage you to remain in good, mental health by encouraging you to avoid negative thoughts and worries that would make your life a miserable hell. I bet, if your mother also strictly encouraged healthy thinking, in addition to physical health, you'd never have these miserable struggles, since you would've kept your thoughts healthy since the very beginning.

My Reply: You could be right. God, or these heavenly beings, could've, at least, given me some inner voice before I had all these miserable struggles. It would be a voice that would've always been there with me, which would be a voice that not only strictly encourages me to keep my body healthy, but my thoughts healthy. Actually, I wouldn't need some inner voice to tell me to keep my body healthy, since my mother was that voice. But, I'd need some inner voice back then to tell me to keep my thoughts healthy, so that I would've avoided all these miserable struggles. Sure, during my miserable struggles, my mother was there to help me, and give me advice. But, she never had a strict attitude to keep a healthy mindset.

Other Person's Response: I think it's better to live with a parent who strictly upholds good health habits, and for the children to never do drugs, smoke, and do other things that would damage their health, than it would be to live with a parent who doesn't care about his children, and for the children to damage their bodies through unhealthy lifestyles. Even if the children, who grew up, damaging their bodies through bad health habits, learned the life lesson to never live an unhealthy lifestyle, it's better for children to grow up healthy by living with good parents, since these children would've already learned this life lesson since the very beginning, and wouldn't have to learn it by damaging their bodies.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

My Reply: Exactly. That's why it would've been better if I was already given the life lesson to keep a healthy mindset, rather than having to learn this lesson by going through years of misery. God, or these heavenly beings, could've just given me this life lesson upon my very birth. So, they could've bestowed divine knowledge upon me. That, or I could've lived with a mother who strictly upholds healthy thinking, in addition to good health.

Other Person's Response: Have you always kept your body healthy?

My Reply: Yes. I live with a mother who strictly upholds good health habits. But, who knows, in another lifetime, I might live with a mother who doesn't care about my health, and I might be that female who destroys her body through drug use.

Other Person's Response: Let's pretend that, in this lifetime, you lived with a mother who didn't care about your health, and even wanted you to live an unhealthy lifestyle. Would you be someone who destroys his body through bad health habits?

My Reply: I'm not sure. If I knew these bad health habits would be bad for me, then it's still possible I'd keep my body healthy anyway. I've always been known to be the type of person to look out for myself, and keep myself healthy. So, I might still keep my body healthy. Even in the scenario you presented. Then again, I didn't keep my thinking healthy. So, it's quite possible that, if I didn't live with a mother who strictly encourages good, physical health habits, that I'd do drugs, smoke, drink alcohol, etc.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your philosophy, there are certain emotions we feel that we just can't explain. They could be very profound emotions.

My Reply: Actually, since emotions are value judgments, then there is a way to describe them. But, it might be too difficult for some people to describe them. Maybe it's because these people don't have the rich vocabulary necessary.

Other Person's Response: Do you have phobias? If so, could you share them?

My Reply: I do have a couple of phobias I'd want to share. My 1st phobia would be being out in an open space or field. Especially on a hot, sunny day. I can explain why that is, since I've figured out the cause of this phobia, and have actually eliminated it myself. When I'm out in the open field or space, I don't have food and water right next to me. My fear was that, if I don't get the proper amount of food and water, I'll faint. The experience of fainting would be a frightening experience for me. So, not having food and water near me would cause me to panic.

When it's hot and sunny, not getting enough to drink would make it more likely for you to faint. That's why I experience more fear being out in an open space or field on a hot, sunny day than on a normal, cloudy day. But, I've learned to no longer fear the experience of fainting if it ever does happen to me. I just allowed myself to face it. That's what eliminated this phobia. I also had a fear of fear. When I was younger, and was home alone, my mother wasn't there, since she'd be out shopping, or doing something else.

My fear was that, if I feel fear, my mother, and anyone else, wouldn't be there to comfort me from said fear. As a I result, I started to feel fear. By not wanting to feel fear, I made myself feel fear. After all, that's how the brain works. By avoiding certain emotions, you only bring more of those emotions upon yourself. That's why people who try very hard to not feel anxiety end up feeling anxiety. So, by facing your fear, you reduce, or even eliminate it. As for my fear of being home alone, I no longer have that fear either. I think this is a fear I simply outgrew.

Now, there's one more phobia I'd like to share, and I still have this phobia. When my mother was driving me around in her car, there was a moment I was excited. I forgot what I was excited in regards to. Anyway, she had some loud music on, and she was driving 40 or 50 mph. All of that was one, big rush for my brain. The high speed, combined with the excitement and loud music, put my mind on a roller coaster. My brain got a sort of rushing or speeding sensation. It was an experience that caused me panic, since it was so overbearing.

When people ride roller coasters, you might see them panic, since it's too much of a rush for their brains. I think, again, the idea would be to allow your mind to go on that roller coaster's experience to eliminate, or reduce the fear. By avoiding it and wanting to have a calm mind instead, that only makes matters worse. It causes your mind to race even more, and just causes panic. So, when driving with my mother, I must find a way to allow that experience. By allowing it, I think I'd rid of this phobia. But, this is much more difficult for me to allow than my previous phobia.

Knowing that my mother would be upset if I panic in the car makes matters worse because I'd be trying to keep my mind calm so I don't panic. But, that only causes that racing mind and panic. Whenever I'm in an energetic mood while riding in a vehicle, it's much more difficult for me to keep my mind calm, since it's so active. Thus, I experience much more of that mental, racing sensation and panic than I would if I was in a calm mood. My mother could even be driving at a moderate speed with no music on, and the speed itself would be enough for me to have that frightening experience.

I can't even take a bus because that would be much worse for me. The driver isn't going to slow down or stop his bus to ease my panic. So, I'd have to wait patiently until I arrive at the destination I need to be. That puts me in a position where I must keep my mind calm during the whole ride. Again, when I try to keep my mind calm, that only causes me to panic, since I'm trying to avoid panic. So, my panic would be worse on a bus than driving with my mother because at least my mother would slow down or stop. I don't think taking a sedative would help much because that phobia is still there.

Medication only helps a little bit. But, it's not a cure. It doesn't rid of the phobia in any given moment. This phobia even applies to my daily life, since the Earth is moving very fast. Just knowing that the Earth constantly moves at a very high speed caused me panic. However, when I do experience that racing mind in this situation, that sensation is nowhere near as intense. That's because there's no high speed being felt, loud music, etc. to amplify the experience. If I could actually feel the Earth speeding, then that racing mind would be a more intense experience. But, since the sensation is at a low intensity, then I'm able to face it.

Even when loud music is being played, it doesn't intensity that sensation much. Therefore, I'm able to face the sensation in my daily life, which means the phobia no longer applies to my daily life anymore. I no longer have the fear in regards to the Earth speeding. But, the phobia still applies to driving in a car or riding a bus, since that mental sensation becomes more intense and, thus, more difficult to face. So, I still have a fear of riding the bus, and I still have moments of fear when driving with my mother, or anyone else. Even riding in a taxi or uber would cause me fear, knowing that I have to keep my mind calm during the ride.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your phobia of riding a bus, you're going to have to ride a bus someday, won't you?

My Reply: Yes. My mother told me I would. So, I'd have to face my phobia, and try my best to just allow that mental sensation. I only face my fears when I have to, and, if I need to ride the bus, then I'm going to have to face my phobia.

Other Person's Response: When a person is attracted to someone, he might experience certain symptoms, such as sweating, and a racing mind.

My Reply: Yes. I experience a racing mind when riding in a vehicle. When I'm in a calm, relaxed mood, it's more difficult to trigger that racing, mental experience. But, when I'm full of energy, it's much easier.

Other Person's Response: Would you experience a racing mind while riding in a vehicle, even when no fear is present?

My Reply: I think so. So, if my phobia was gone, I might still have that racing mind.

Other Person's Response: Even if you did find a way to face your fears, they might not be eliminated completely. A small amount of fear could still remain.

My Reply: That's possible.

Other Person's Response: I know a lot of people who avoid their phobias, which only causes them more fear. But, the goal should be to avoid avoiding the fear. Instead of running away from your fear, you should run away from running away from the fear.

My Reply: Yes. It was the fear I experienced from these phobias, which was what I wanted to avoid, since it was such a frightening experience for me. I knew that avoiding the phobia itself would only cause me more fear. So, by wanting to avoid avoiding the phobia, I eliminated my fear. If you tell someone to just face his phobia, then that makes it difficult because many people have a hard time facing their phobias.

But, if you word it differently by telling people to avoid avoiding their phobias, then that might sometimes work to eliminate their fear. The same idea applies to panic attacks. If wanting to avoid a panic attack is just causing a person more panic, and he doesn't want all that additional panic he's bringing upon himself, then instead of telling him to just face the panic attack, you should tell him to avoid wanting to avoid the panic attack.

You'd basically be using his avoidance to his advantage in preventing him from inflicting more and more panic upon himself, rather than just telling him to be a man, tough up, and face the panic attack. People who don't want self-inflicted panic should use this method because it will actually keep them safe from said panic, sometimes.

In summary, when a person runs away from his fear, that only causes him more fear. Thus, it's worse to run away from fear because that only brings more fear upon yourself. So, by wanting to avoid avoiding the fear, you no longer have that fear.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your bus phobia, you'd have to run away from running away from that fear, wouldn't you?

My Reply: Yes. I'd have to run towards the fear then, in order to run away from the other alternative of having the fear consume me.

Other Person’s Response: I heard you’ve eliminated some of your phobias through a method you’ve invented yourself.

My Reply: Yes. I’ll explain my method. If you had a phobia, such as a fear of spiders, there are two things, which would be: 1.) the spider 2.) the fear of the spider. Pretend that #1 is a safe place for you to hide from #2, since #2 would be so awful, and you don’t want it. After all, it’s the fear of the spider that makes the spider so frightening for you. Without the fear, then the spider would just be a spider in your eyes. Or, it would be a beautiful creature for you, rather than a horrible, frightening one. So, it’s the fear you want to hide from. Therefore, next time, when you’re near a spider, remain next to the spider as though you’re trying to hide from the fear of the spider. Hopefully, this method works for people to eliminate their phobias. It might not work for some phobias though.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person’s Response: So, your method involves both facing the stimulus and avoiding the fear of it because the person would be facing the spider, but hiding from the fear of the spider at the same time.

My Reply: Yes. The person must first separate the fear from the stimulus, which creates #1 and #2, and then act as though the stimulus (#1) is a safe place to hide from the fear of the stimulus (#2).

Other Person’s Response: Many people talk about being courageous and facing your fears. But, according to you, a person just needs to face the stimulus, and hide from the fear.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person’s Response: If this method worked for you, then I think you’ve had fears; not phobias. I don’t think this method would work for phobias. There’s a difference between fears and phobias. Phobias can’t be eliminated through rationalizing or through methods like yours.

My Reply: You could be right. I don’t think this method worked for my spider phobia. Or, maybe, it will work, and I just have to try harder next time I come across a spider.

Other Person’s Response: Does your phobia elimination method work to eliminate the misery, and other negative emotions, from this worry you’re having regarding near death experiences?

My Reply: Not at all.

Other Person's Response: I’m going to talk about something different here, which is that trying to prevent a certain emotion would only serve to make you feel said emotion. If you try to avoid feeling miserable, then you're likely to make yourself feel miserable. If you allow yourself to feel miserable, and to become accepting of it, you reduce or eliminate your misery.

My Reply: That even applies to laughter as well. If you try to not make yourself laugh or smile, then you're very likely to laugh or smile. There were times my mother was angry, and I thought it would be awful if I laughed or smiled, since that would only make her even more upset. So, I tried to not smile or laugh. As a result, I smiled and laughed. She became upset with me, thought I was laughing intentionally at her suffering, or that I had a slight touch of insanity, despite my overall, sane personality.

She looked down upon me as a crazy person, or someone with sinister intentions, when that wasn't the case at all. It was simply a huge misunderstanding on her part. Besides, I've always been a kind individual. I never tortured others and laughed intentionally at their suffering. I don't commit crimes, and neither am I a crazy person. So, I can assure my mother and other people that, if I ever come across as someone with bad intentions, then you're getting the wrong idea about me.

Other Person’s Response: You said that you have a nervous smile or laugh in situations you shouldn’t be laughing or smiling. Could you explain this?

My Reply: Sure. I’m not sure if I’d describe it as a nervous smile or laugh. But, I’ll explain. If someone had a gun to my head and was going to blow me away if I smiled, then chances are, I’d smile. That’s because by trying to prevent myself from smiling, I end up smiling. It’s a known fact that if you try to prevent certain thoughts, feelings, and reactions from happening, you end up making them happen. It’s completely normal, and you can ask any therapist about this.

It would be like if someone presented you a youtube video clip, told you to not smile while watching it, and you end up smiling. It would also be like if you told yourself to not think about elephants, and you end up thinking about them. So, by trying not to make myself smile in that gun scenario, I’d find something funny that would make me smile while the gun is pointing at my head, such as a joke a friend or family member told me in the past.

I could even find the wall funny. When my mother has hardships, such as financial issues, I don’t want to laugh or smile, since that would upset her. So, by trying not to make myself laugh or smile, I end up doing so. There was a time she was having a difficult time in her life, and I found her very presence funny, which made me smile a bit. She was also wearing a furry hat, and I found that funny as well. She took it the wrong way and thought I was intentionally laughing at her suffering, when I wasn’t.

Other Person's Response: Well, I'm glad you can articulate the things you need to explain. If you couldn't do that, then other people wouldn't realize the real truth about you. They'd think you're laughing on purpose, or that you're a selfish, piece of ****, since your positive emotions are the only things that make your life beautiful and worth living. By explaining everything to these people, you help them understand you as an individual.

My Reply: Yes. If I couldn't explain, then people would just be attributing false judgments about me. I was no good at explaining things in the past. But, I've gotten much better at it. So, people should now have a true understanding of me, rather than judging me. My mother had her own judgment about me all along that was never true. I'm not trying to be mean or demeaning of her when saying this.

It's just that we as human beings have false judgments all the time. It's best if said judgments be corrected. If my mother, or anyone else, has a false judgment about me, I'm not going to be mean about it. I'll just simply explain why they're wrong, since I'm now able to come up with the right explanations, and articulate myself well. That's why I'm glad I have a computer, so I can type all this out. I print out my explanations and share them to people.

Other Person's Response: So, if you no longer wish to laugh or smile in situations where it would be inappropriate, you'd have to allow yourself to laugh or smile, rather than trying to prevent it?

My Reply: Yes. Again, that's just how the brain works. Ask any therapist or professional, and they'll tell you that's how it works.

Other Person's Response: You say positive emotions make us angels on the inside, while negative emotions make us demons on the inside. Are all negative emotions inner demons?

My Reply: All negative emotions classify as the inner darkness. But, there are some that classify as the inner demon. If you felt hate or disgust, I'd classify that as an inner demon. But, if you felt sad, hurt, or miserable, then I'd just classify that as the inner darkness.

Other Person's Response: So, if a person felt a positive emotion one moment, that would make him a being of light in that given moment? When he feels a negative emotion another moment, he'd be a being of darkness, or a demon on the inside, during that given moment?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: You say positive emotions are the only way things can be great. That's not true. For example, there can be a great amount of money, regardless of how you feel.

My Reply: The form of greatness I'm talking about is a great work of art, a great, wonderful person, etc. Positive emotions are the only way things can be great and wonderful from our perspective. But, as for the other form of greatness (such as a great amount of money), that form of greatness can obviously exist from our perspective, even without our positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: I think people who struggle with depression and end their lives, such as Robin Williams, were committing a very selfish act.

My Reply: The reason why he ended his life is because he did not have the Holy Light (positive emotions) within him. Like I said before, without the holy light within us, then we are dead and empty on the inside, and our lives will amount to nothing. Since people are ignorant and in denial of this, then they do not understand his suffering. Rather, they just think he was selfish or childish.

Sure, he could have stuck around in this life and got the help he needed to bring back his positive emotions. But, if he has already done so, and this struggle of his just kept on and on without his positive emotions sufficiently returning back to him, then I consider it to be a justified act of suicide.

It would instead be selfish and inconsiderate of others to expect him to drag his life on like this, when it's a virtually worthless life of no beauty and joy that should be ended. In my opinion, people should just give up on their lives, their dreams, goals, and families when they lose their positive emotions and have to live like this.

Other Person's Response: It seems to me you've written these packets as a con, scam, or hoax, and to justify suicide.

My Reply: That wasn't my intention in writing these packets. Everything I've written has been my own personal experience, and all I'm doing is speaking up for myself, since there are so many people who deny and dismiss my personal experience. As for the religious dogma I've written, people are free to dismiss that because there might be no god, paranormal, or afterlife.

But, I wanted to share the religious form of my worldview anyway. However, I take issue when people dismiss my personal experience because feeling positive emotions is what we need. It's how things matter to us in positive ways. That's something personal I need in my life, and for people to deny and dismiss something like that really gets to me.

Other Person's Response: If positive emotions really were this ultimate, divine thing you speak of, then why are there so many people just fine living without them? Why do so many people claim their lives have beauty and joy with no need for them?

My Reply: Again, it's because people are delusional and in denial. They're not awakened to their divine nature as spiritual beings. They just carry on with their lives like robots or machines, believing this is somehow a beautiful way to live, when it never was.

Other Person's Response: A person who struggles with depression needs some advice to help him get through life, and telling him that his life is nothing beautiful isn't going to help.

My Reply: So many depressed people just carry on in life with their mental illness. They take the advice of others who tell them that they just got to make the best of things, and that life isn't happy or perfect. That was never the right thing to do. Sure, giving such advice would certainly help these depressed people cope with their empty lives. But, what really needs to be done here is to find cures for these depressed people to restore their positive emotions, so that their lives can have beautiful and joyful meaning.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: You said feeling proud is the only way to be proud. What about disappointment?

My Reply: Feeling disappointed is the only way to be disappointed. So, disappointment is also an emotion.

Other Person's Response: I could give another example of a negative emotion, and it would be feeling uncomfortable.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I heard you feel uncomfortable when you have to urinate or have a bowel movement with other people around. If you couldn't feel any negative emotions, then you'd feel comfortable.

My Reply: Correct. That's another reason why I see no need for negative emotions. Also, I can't help but feel uncomfortable, and I wish I didn't feel this way.

Other Person's Response: If you couldn't feel uncomfortable when you have to urinate or have a bowel movement with other people around, you could just go.

My Reply: Yes. If I could feel comfortable (a positive emotion), then I could just relax and go. Feeling uncomfortable is nothing more than a major inconvenience for me.

Other Person's Response: Another example of a negative emotion would be a feeling of agitation.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Are cute and adorable value judgments?

My Reply: Yes. They would be positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: If something is disturbing, that would also be a value judgment, right?

My Reply: Yes. It would be a negative emotion.

Other Person's Response: If emotions are the only source of value and worth in your life, then that makes you a dysfunctional adult. It seems you don't have the proper, mental functioning needed for greater, more mature, values.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that's true. Emotions might be the only source of value and worth.

Other Person's Response: If you were undergoing meditation, and the exercise instructed you to relax, are you saying the only way you could relax would be if you felt relaxed?

My Reply: Yes. I don't feel relaxed too often. The only time I'm in a relaxed mood would be if I was worn out from exercising, or if something else triggered that relaxed emotional state. When I'm not feeling relaxed, I'd be listening to the meditation exercise no differently than someone casually reading the newspaper or an article. In other words, my mind would just be aware and attentive. But, I wouldn't be in a relaxed state. So, I don't think meditation exercises would work for me, given that the main goal when doing these exercises is to be in a relaxed state of mind. Even if I did feel relaxed when doing these exercises, that relaxed mood wouldn't last long.

Other Person's Response: So, people without their positive emotions can't be in a relaxed state of mind when they do meditation?

My Reply: Correct. Their minds can only be aware and attentive. If they were feeling other emotions, such as fear or misery, then they'd be in a fearful or miserable state of mind. These people would have to find a way to feel relaxed, so they can be in a relaxed state. If they can't, then they're out of luck. So, they'd have to wait for that positive emotion (that feeling of relaxation) to return.

Other Person's Response: I know plenty of people who don't have positive emotions. They can't be in a relaxed mood. Yet, meditation still helps them.

My Reply: Then, maybe, you don't need to be relaxed in order for meditation to work. You can simply have a mind that's aware and attentive. So, maybe, you can just listen to the instructions, and it would still work for you.

Other Person's Response: If feeling relaxed was the only way to be in a relaxed state of mind, then why are there people claiming they're in a relaxed state of mind, when they're not in a relaxed mood?

My Reply: It's because they don't realize they're not in a relaxed state of mind. They think they're in a relaxed state, when they're not. They confuse a mind that's aware and attentive with a mind that's relaxed. They're not the same thing. People are also confused when it comes to love, joy, beauty, and worth. They also think they can experience love and joy without their positive emotions, when that's false.

Other Person's Response: If you want greater values in your life, then you must become the opposite of wild and impulsive. I realize you're no good at this. That's why there's meditation.

My Reply: I'll do meditation if it's my last resort.

Other Person's Response: When you feel any given emotion, and you describe that emotion as being the experience of value, wouldn't that just be you attributing value to emotions when, in reality, they're nothing more than just emotions?

My Reply: No. If I feel beauty in regards to something, such as watching children play, I can clearly tell this positive emotion has that beauty to it. I can clearly tell this positive emotion possesses a playful, childish, beauty to it. If I feel beauty in regards to a sad song, I can clearly tell I'm experiencing a form of beauty that isn't sad (since feeling sad is the only way I can experience sadness).

Rather, it's a form of beauty that has a serious tone to it. But, that tone isn't anything negative, since negative emotions are the only way I can experience negativity. I could also feel forms of beauty and joy that have a powerful, dramatic, serious tone to them. But, it would be nothing but a positive experience for me, since I'd be feeling a positive emotion.

Other Person's Response: Just how do you know for sure positive emotions are the only way we can love, and the only way things become good, amazing, beautiful, etc. for us?

My Reply: Well, when something is good, amazing, and beautiful for you, that's the ultimate experience one can have in life. It's the ultimate mental state one can be in. The same thing applies to love, since that's the ultimate experience one can have. I can clearly tell I'm not having those experiences without my positive emotions. Therefore, that's why I conclude positive emotions are the only source of beauty, goodness, love, etc. The same idea applies to negative emotions. I can clearly tell nothing's horrible, disgusting, disturbing, or tragic to me when I'm not feeling negative emotions.

Other Person's Response: So, no discussion or reasoning can convince you there's more beauty and goodness to life than positive emotions? It's instead your inner experience that determines whether you'll be convinced of that or not?

My Reply: Correct. If a person wanted a certain experience (such as hunger), then it's about whether he's actually hungry or not. It's not about sitting there, trying to convince him he can be hungry, when he's not feeling hungry. If I was in such a situation of wanting to be hungry, then only me feeling hungry would convince me I'm hungry.

I've never had an intellectual form of hunger (hunger that comes through thoughts and beliefs alone), just as how I've never had an intellectual form of value and worth. So, nobody can convince me I can be hungry through my intellect, just as how nobody can convince me I can have an intellectual form of value, love, joy, and worth in my life.

Other Person's Response: I agree hunger and thirst are mental states, since they're produced by the brain. All feelings, thoughts, and sensations are a result of the brain.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I know that, when people laugh, they cry. Why is that?

My Reply: I think it's due to a heightened emotional response. Even feelings of anger and sexual arousal can trigger tears if they're heightened emotional responses. In other words, if an emotion is very intense, it might trigger tears.

Other Person's Response: You sell yourself out to hedonism, and that makes you a loser, no different than the rest of the world. You're no different than those types of people who sell out to porn and drugs. I realize you don't smoke, do drugs, drink alcohol, or have sex. But, you're still a loser.

My Reply: I don't care what you or anyone else thinks. Hedonism is my personal way of life, and I'll wallow in my own feelings of happiness all I want. It would be no different than if a person was rich. It would be his business if he wishes to wallow in his own riches.

Other Person's Response: What if someone complimented your hedonistic lifestyle and honored it?

My Reply: Then that would be respectful.

Other Person's Response: I realize some people would say you're not a profound individual, since you lack intelligence, and your philosophy is very shallow.

My Reply: Yes. But, you don't have to be intelligent, or have a great philosophy to be a profound individual. For example, someone can be dumb, and have a philosophy that's not on par with other ones out there, but still have thoughts of profound love, beauty, and joy. These thoughts would then make him feel profound love, beauty, and joy, which would make him a profoundly loving, beautiful, joyful person.

Other Person's Response: Many people believe this lie that life would hold no value or worth without emotions, and many people are brainwashed by it, including you.

My Reply: I don't think it's a lie.

Other Person's Response: You're more than just an animal, since you didn't act out on your violent feelings during your miserable struggles, and you're able to intellectualize and explain, in great detail, your philosophy.

My Reply: Yes. But, many people would say the values I live by are those of an animal.

Other Person's Response: I've perceived/experienced moments in my life as beautiful and worthwhile. I can

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

assure you those weren't emotional states.

My Reply: I think they were emotional states. Also, an emotion can be so small in intensity, that it doesn't seem like an emotion. Rather, it seems like your mindset alone is allowing you to perceive/experience moments as beautiful and worthwhile when, in reality, it's a positive emotion you're feeling that you don't recognize as being a positive emotion.

When positive emotions are at their normal intensity level, that would be a more intense surge of perceived/experienced beauty and worth, and it becomes more obvious that it's an emotional state.

Another example would be that, if you felt panic (intense fear), it would be obvious to you that's an emotion. But, if you felt fear at a very small intensity level, then that might give the false impression that you're experiencing fear through your mindset alone when, in reality, that fear is still an emotion.

Other Person's Response: I bet you're the type of person who only fights for his own happiness, but wouldn't put himself through misery to fight for others.

My Reply: Correct. My happiness is the only thing that can make my life valuable and beautiful.

Other Person's Response: Did you sit there and try, with all your power, to mentally tap into some higher form of beauty and joy in your life besides your positive emotions? Did that work to give your life this greater form of beauty and joy?

My Reply: I tried, and it didn't work at all. I tried becoming a better, stronger person right then and there who has a better philosophy, and it didn't work.

Other Person's Response: If our brains are receivers, as you say they are, then perhaps your brain is receiving the divine light a primitive way, which would be the emotional way. Maybe that's why your positive emotions are the experience of beauty, love, and joy for you. But, if your brain received the divine light a more evolved way, then perhaps thoughts and beliefs themselves could be the experience of beauty, love, and joy for you instead. If that's the case, then you'd no longer have to rely on your positive emotions to give you positive experiences.

My Reply: I'm not sure.

Other Person's Response: I bet it's just all those negative thoughts and worries you've had that prevented you from experiencing love, beauty, and worth. After all, that's a well known cause for a person's life being devoid of any beautiful, loving, worthwhile experience. So, I don't think it has anything to do with positive emotions. If you were rendered apathetic, due to some mental illness, then I bet you'd still be able to experience love, and I bet you'd still be able to experience your life as beautiful and worth living, even without your positive emotions. In this scenario, you wouldn't have any negative thoughts or worries. You'd just be without your positive emotions.

My Reply: I don't think that's the case. I think positive emotions really are necessary.

Other Person's Response: If someone could rebuild you to make you a better, stronger person with a better philosophy, would you choose to have that person rebuild you?

My Reply: Yes. That's because I'd be living my life by greater, everlasting values.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy is an insult to injury, since it states that people, who struggle with depression or unhappiness, aren't living beautiful, worthwhile lives.

My Reply: Yes, it is. But, that's just the way life is. Life is known to be an insult to injury.

Other Person's Response: I, too, find your worldview very offensive because you're saying that the lives of depressed, genius artists were nothing beautiful.

My Reply: This is just a claim I'm making. I'm claiming there's no more value to life than our emotions, and I'm making all these supporting arguments. It would be no different than if I claimed that you can't have a healthy relationship, as long as you live with an intolerant wife or husband, and, from there, made supporting arguments for that claim.

Other Person's Response: Well, I do think it's a character strength for someone to learn from his struggles, and keep his thought processes healthy.

My Reply: I agree. Another thing. If I can be rendered without the capacity to experience beauty, love, and joy (which I have on many occasions), then why couldn't god create me as a being who has no capacity to experience suffering? This would mean no negative thought could ever make me suffer, since it would never make me feel miserable, or any other horrible, disturbing emotion. Such emotions are suffering for me, and I don't wish to have them.

Other Person's Response: You say that, every time you have a positive thought, that gives you a positive experience, once that thought makes you feel a positive emotion. Sure, you're having positive experiences during those moments. But, don't let that fool you into believing it's the positive emotions that are the positive experiences for you. You just think you need positive emotions to have positive experiences, when you really don't. So, you're just allowing your emotions to dictate whatever experience you're having, whether it be a positive experience, or a negative experience.

My Reply: I'm not sure. All I know is that my emotions have been the only positive and negative experiences in my life.

Other Person's Response: I bet, if you were a martial artist who trained his mind and body, you wouldn't have the weak philosophy you currently have. I think it's your shallow, weak, hedonistic way of life that renders you with this shallow, weak, hedonistic philosophy.

My Reply: I'm not sure about that. I still might need to enjoy training my mind and body, as well as martial arts tournaments, in order for it to be valuable and beautiful to me.

Other Person's Response: There's a difference between someone who's weak, and someone who's just limiting himself. I think you're the type who's just limiting himself because I bet, if you believed there's a better philosophy than hedonism that you're capable of living your life by, and that positive emotions aren't the only things that make life beautiful and precious, you'd be living by this better philosophy. But, if you were weak, you wouldn't be able to upgrade your philosophy, despite having the belief mentioned earlier. I think the reason why you're stuck with your hedonistic philosophy is because you don't have this belief.

So, that's why I think you're not weak, and that you're just limiting yourself. If you think there's nothing better in life than positive emotions, then of course you're going to be stuck with your hedonistic philosophy. Also, imagine a scenario where someone is fighting in a ring with an opponent. If the fighter is easily capable of defeating his opponent, but is getting his *** kicked in because he thinks he can't defeat his opponent, then he's just limiting himself, and allowing his opponent to beat him down. But, if he believes he can defeat his opponent, but is still getting his *** kicked in because he's not capable of defeating his opponent, then he's just weak.

My Reply: You could be right. I might easily be capable of upgrading my philosophy, but am instead limiting myself from my true potential, and allowing my emotions to dictate my life. If I wasn't limiting myself, then perhaps I'd be living my life by a better philosophy right now. Likewise, if that fighter wasn't limiting himself, then perhaps he'd easily be able to defeat his opponent.

Other Person's Response: If you want to become a better, stronger person with a better philosophy, then you just need a change in your mindset.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that would even work. If there really is another way I can have a positive experience besides my positive emotions, which would allow me to persevere in my goals and dreams, then having the right mindset might still not be enough in order for me to obtain that new experience. That's because I might still be weak as an individual. In which case, I don't know how I'm supposed to obtain that new positive experience at this point.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother agree with your hedonistic philosophy?

My Reply: No. She doesn't base her values on emotions, even though she may act out on her emotions sometimes.

Other Person's Response: How vital and necessary do you think positive emotions are?

My Reply: It's like giving a plant the water and sunlight it needs to thrive. Without that, it just becomes a dark, dull, withered, disgusting plant. During my miserable moments, I'm like a dead, withered plant. But, once my positive emotions return, it's as though a flow has rushed in and revitalized me. For a plant, it would be a flow of water. But, for me, it would be a flow of divine energy. It would be a flow of pure beauty, greatness, and joy itself.

Other Person's Response: It seems to me life is a place where we're meant to transcend our impulses. For example, if someone is always getting himself in trouble, since he acts out on his emotions, then that would put him in a position where he'd be expected to develop as an individual. I think you have yet to reach that point.

My Reply: Even if I did reach that point, I'm not sure my philosophy can change.

Other Person's Response: This life being very unhappy, where positive emotions are fleeting, serves a major benefit, since it puts you in a position where changing your hedonistic philosophy is necessary. So, I think life is meant for learning and growing, rather than just happiness.

My Reply: I don't know if it can change though.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy fails to meets the demands of daily life. Thus, it's a defective philosophy. It would be like if I had a computer, in poor condition, that fails when it comes to demanding tasks, but works just fine when I do basic things on it.

My Reply: I see what you mean. My values simply do not stand in the face of misery, despair, apathy, and unhappiness.

Other Person's Response: I don't think you should give up like that when you feel miserable. Have you ever watched Rocky Balboa? He says how winning is done is through taking the punches of life, and carrying on.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

My Reply: I think Rocky is wrong here. He acts as though there's more beauty and greatness to life than feeling happiness, fun, and enjoyment. He is dismissing and denying the Holy, Inner Light (positive emotions). Therefore, I think the only true winner in life is someone who feels happy all the time. When I say someone is winning at life, that's no different than saying this person is living a good, beautiful life, and that his endeavors are being pursued in a good, beautiful manner. That's why positive emotions are the only way we can win at life, since they're the only things that make life good and beautiful.

Other Person's Response: I think Rocky was right, and you're wrong. I think you're just weak-willed, weak-minded, and incapable.

My Reply: That's just your personal view. I have my own personal views as to why I'm right, and I'm sharing these views.

Other Person's Response: If you were wrong, and you knew you were wrong, would Rocky's advice give whole new value to your life, and would you not give up on your hobbies and composing dream?

My Reply: I'm not sure. I might still need psychological help to get there.

Other Person's Response: Some people would call you weak. But, I don't think so. The very fact that you've endured through this whole miserable struggle you've had, and finally reached the other side to a place of happiness and joy, shows strength right there!

My Reply: Thank you.

Other Person's Response: I have a different view. If there was a war where heroes didn't give up, and kept fighting on, despite their pain and misery, then these would be the true champions. But, you are like the person in the battlefield who hardly fought at all, and perceived no value during the battle.

Instead, you've given up on the battle, and just wallowed in your own pain and misery the whole way through until the war was over. Once the war, pain, and misery was all over, you celebrated the return of your joy, and carried on with your life. That's not something to be honored, or to be proud of, and neither is it any true strength of character.

My Reply: That's just your personal view then. Even if I was a powerful champion/warrior for having endured through all of that misery, being this warrior is nothing good, since only a happy, fun life is good. Therefore, it doesn't matter how weak or how strong I am as a person. The only thing that matters is that I'm happy, having fun, and enjoying my life.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your philosophy, I think people who carry on in life and don't give up on their dreams, despite their misery and despair, are living the truly beautiful lives, since they have something more to live for than their positive emotions.

My Reply: When a person goes to work and carries on with his misery, I see that as being no way of life. So, the image that conveys me wouldn't be that miserable person who just carries on in his work life. The image that conveys me would be someone who goes to work just to enjoy the beautiful office scene, or to enjoy doing things there. It would be like I'm living my life as a soul, visiting different beautiful realms, whether these realms be a beautiful, joyful office environment, a beautiful nature environment, or a beautiful carnival. Since I'm like a soul, visiting different beautiful, joyful realms, then it's as though I'm living my life as a wild, free, spiritual being.

I consider this way of life to be something greater than someone who just carries on like a beaten down soldier in a life of depression and misery. Having me live a life of misery, or apathy, is like putting me, the wild spiritual being, in a cage, where my life loses all perceived beauty. Sure, I could still be free, even without my positive emotions, since I'm a free citizen in the USA, and I can go out into nature almost anytime I want to. But, I would not be spiritually free, since I don't have that inner light (positive emotions) to give me that beautiful, joyful experience.

Without my positive emotions, then my soul would either be trapped in the realm of darkness (aka hell) if I was miserable, or trapped in The Void if I was apathetic. Spiritual realms do exist here on Earth for us, and they can either be heaven, hell, or The Void. How our minds enter a heavenly, spiritual realm would be when we experience beauty, greatness, and joy. Since positive emotions are that experience, given that emotional perception theory of value I presented earlier, then positive emotions are what create a beautiful heaven for us. My conscious being existing in the heavenly realm is how I become spiritually free.

Other Person's Response: I think hedonists are people with a lot of joyful, fun emotions to release. It would be no different than a person with a lot of physical energy to release. He'd release that energy by running or doing some other form of exercise, and the hedonists would release their emotional energy by creating works of art, engaging in porn, etc.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: You've written all these packets when you didn't have your positive emotions. Do you sometimes wish you could wait until your positive emotions return to write them, so the whole process would be valuable and worthwhile to you?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy really doesn't work in this unfortunate, unhappy life. I think you're better off just killing yourself, so you can go back to the heavenly afterlife, which would be a life compatible with your philosophy.

My Reply: I'm not going to kill myself. Especially when I'm happy and enjoying my life here on Earth. Hopefully, when I die naturally on my own, there will be a heavenly afterlife for me.

Other Person's Response: While we're on the topic of the afterlife, I think it's selfish to desire a heavenly afterlife.

My Reply: Well, there are many people who don't just desire a blissful, heavenly afterlife for themselves. They wish it for other people as well. So, there are people who only want things for themselves, for themselves and for others, and there are those who don't want anything, and wish other people could have things. There are also those types of people who don't want anything, and don't want other people to have anything either.

Other Person's Response: Are you the type of person who'd not only want a blissful afterlife for himself, but for other kind people?

My Reply: Yes. I wouldn't want my therapist to die, and that be the end of him. I'd want him to live on in a blissful afterlife, and I'd want my loved ones to live on in a blissful afterlife as well.

Other Person's Response: I think you're onto something with your philosophy. Spiritual believers say our true home is heaven, where there is pure bliss, goodness, love, and joy. By having that heavenly experience on Earth, we're bringing heaven down to Earth for us. Sure, here on Earth, it wouldn't be as powerful and profound of an experience compared to our souls being in heaven. But, the fact is, we're still bringing heaven down to Earth through our positive emotions, and I think that's the goal of life.

My Reply: Yes. But, since this Earthly existence is a very unfortunate place, then it makes it difficult to achieve this goal.

Other Person's Response: The emotional based values you live by are weak, unstable, and unreliable. It would be like a chair with only 1 leg. I think you need to develop some strong, stable, everlasting values in your life.

My Reply: I don't know if that's ever going to happen.

Other Person's Response: Is it even possible to experience an everlasting form of horror, tragedy, despair, beauty, love, or joy? If someone experienced tragedy and despair from a loved one's death, then that tragedy and despair wouldn't be everlasting. The person would eventually recover from it, and be all better. So, I think this says it can't be everlasting, which means it has to be emotional, since emotions aren't everlasting. Therefore, the idea that one can have an everlasting form of those experiences, through his thoughts and beliefs, must be false. That means you must be right when you say those experiences can only be emotional.

My Reply: Yes. So, when it comes to experiencing things in life as valuable, precious, and worthwhile, I don't think that can be an everlasting experience either, which means it must be emotional. It has to be an experience that can only happen through our fleeting positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: Someone could hate someone his whole life. But, that experience of hate wouldn't be everlasting (24/7) his whole life.

My Reply: Yes. I don't think it's possible to experience hate 24/7 your whole life. There has to be moments where hate subsides, just as how there has to be moments where panic and anxiety subsides. Since panic and anxiety are emotions that subside, then hate must also be an emotion that subsides. The same idea applies to all other positive and negative experiences. They, too, are emotions that subside every now and then.

Other Person's Response: I realize this misery-inducing worry of yours has put you into an unhealthy, crippled, morbid state that lasted 24/7 everyday for a very long time.

My Reply: Yes. But, as time went on, I slowly got out of that horrible state of mind, and returned back to my normal, healthy state.

Other Person's Response: If you were to obtain an everlasting form of love, beauty, hate, etc. in your life besides your emotions, then you might come to realize emotions never were any real beauty, love, hate, etc. Once you compare your emotions to this newly obtained experience, emotions might be nothing more than biochemical impulses or drives to you now.

My Reply: I don't think I'd ever look back at my emotions and think they're just biochemical feelings like the rest of the world does. Especially those crippled states I've had in my nightmares.

Other Person's Response: If someone lived a happy, easy life, then he'd be a weak individual who wouldn't be able to face life's hardships. I think that's what's going on with you. You used to live a happy, easy life. Then, life became tough for you with all those miserable struggles. But, you weren't strong enough to have greater values in your life, which is why you gave up composing during those struggles.

My Reply: Wouldn't my brain have adapted by now? I've been through many years of misery, and surely my brain would've found a way to have a new positive experience besides my positive emotions.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: I bet, if you were to live with agonizing, physical pain, you'd never get used to it. You'd always wallow in that pain. This says you either have a character weakness, or you don't have a properly functioning brain that can adapt to such situations. I think the same idea applies to your emotions.

My Reply: I might naturally get used to the physical pain. Besides, I've been known to naturally adapt to many other situations, such as being comfortable when sleeping on the floor, when I was uncomfortable at first, switching from sleeping on the bed, to sleeping on the floor. That says my brain's adaptive ability is working just fine. But, maybe, it doesn't work properly when it comes to other situations, such as when I'm feeling miserable and see no more beauty and worth to life.

Other Person's Response: I think your problem is that you simply don't have a positive perspective during your unhappy or apathetic moments. I don't think it has anything to do with the hunger and thirst analogy you made earlier, where thoughts and beliefs alone can't give us a positive perspective/experience, just as how they can't give us the experience of hunger and thirst.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that's the case.

Other Person's Response: I don't think it's your emotions that determine your perspective. Your way of thinking and believing determines that, and it's just difficult for you to have a positive perspective during moments, such as when you have a devastating worry. As a matter of fact, it's very difficult for any human being in general to have a positive outlook during moments of stress and worry.

My Reply: I'm quite sure my positive and negative perspectives are emotional states.

Other Person's Response: Not only do you lack control over your emotions, you also lack control over your thoughts because you couldn't help but have many negative thoughts during moments where you've had devastating worries.

My Reply: As for having much negative thoughts during moments of stress and worry, that happens to any normal person. These negative thoughts would then cause that person to feel negative emotions.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy makes you a very dull, shallow person.

My Reply: Some people would find hedonists very interesting. For example, someone with a wild, erotic, joyful personality would be very attractive to some people. My point is, just because you have a hedonistic personality doesn't mean you're a dull, shallow, uninteresting person.

Other Person's Response: Your worldview shows a sign of character weakness.

My Reply: Actually, there are two types of character. One would be emotional/impulsive based, and the other would be intellectual based. I fail to see the emotional based one as being "weak" or "pathetic." Let me give you an example. There are some people out there who are wild, happy, erotic, and fun people to be around. Many people would like these character traits, and I consider that to be its own unique strength of character. Sure, this personality type might fail and give up when it comes to life's miserable, unhappy hardships. But, then again, the intellectual personality type would give up, and find no meaning in a life filled with nothing but happiness and joy.

For example, some people would think an eternal, blissful life would be hell for them, and they could not carry on in such a life. But, I'd find such a life to be a paradise, and I'd live that life for eternity. I could call them weak for not being able to live an eternal, blissful life, just as how they call me weak for not being able to carry on in a life of misery. Lastly, the intellect will thrive in their lifestyle, while the hedonists will thrive in theirs. It would be like how a fish thrives in water, and how a land creature thrives on land. The water creature doesn't belong on land, and the land creature doesn't belong in water.

Other Person's Response: Given the philosophy you live by, you seem like a very impulsive person. Do you spend a lot of money on gambling? Do you make many foolish choices in your life?

My Reply: I don't do any of those things. That's because I choose not to act on certain impulses, whether it be feeling violent and wanting to harm myself or others, or feeling motivated to do something that would get me in trouble. I don't even feel like gambling anyway, since money isn't all that important to me. But, I'd certainly feel up to pursuing my composing dream, and I'd feel up to playing video games (providing I have my positive emotions). So, these are the impulses I act on. In other words, I only act on those emotional impulses that wouldn't get me or anyone else in trouble.

Other Person's Response: People would say you're a shallow person, since you'd prefer a life that's eternally blissful, and has no hardships, such as illnesses, suffering, and misfortunes. But, I think there are other ways to become a profound individual, and it doesn't have to come through living a hard life. So, let's pretend, even if you did live an eternally blissful, easy life, you could still be a profound, amazing individual through sharing any awesome, memorable compositions you wish to share to the world.

My Reply: Yes. Composing is my dream, and I think I can prove myself as a profound individual through sharing such compositions. I don't need to prove it by living a hard life. Besides, not too many people would want to live a hard life, such as suffering from cancer, and having to live on a hospital bed.

If I had the choice to become a profound, awesome, and powerful individual in the eyes of others through living with misery and cancer, or through being happy, free of illness, and sharing awesome compositions to the world, I'd choose the latter option.

Being happy and illness-free wouldn't convey that I'm a profound and powerful individual to the world. But, if I make profound, powerful compositions, and share them to the world, that's enough to convey I'm an awesome, profound individual.

Other Person's Response: Neither do you need to be intelligent to prove that you're an awesome person.

My Reply: Exactly. As long as I'm an awesome artist who makes powerful compositions, then I've proven myself as an awesome person to the world. There are also other attributes that should deem me as an awesome person in the eyes of others, such as the fact I'm kind and polite.

Other Person's Response: Are you taking up composing just to prove how awesome you are to the world?

My Reply: No. I also wish to share something awesome and unique to the world.

Other Person's Response: How does creating awesome, memorable artwork, whether it be compositions, stories, or paintings, make you an awesome person? If you were a cruel person to others, then the very fact you created amazing artwork wouldn't make you an amazing person.

My Reply: Creating art is an expression of yourself. Therefore, by creating awesome artwork, you are expressing something awesome about yourself to the world. So, even though someone may be a cruel, **** person in the eyes of others, there'd be one thing awesome about him, and it would be the amazing, artistic vision he has and is expressing to the world.

Other Person's Response: I bet there were many famous artists who were well known and praised for their artwork, even though they may be cruel, nasty people in real life.

My Reply: Yes. Fortunately, I'm a kind, polite person who'd be making awesome compositions to share to the world.

Other Person's Response: Well, according to your philosophy, it requires positive emotions to be an awesome person, since that's your definition of an awesome person.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I don't think a weak, shallow, worthless piece of **** like you has what it takes to create awesome, powerful compositions.

My Reply: I might be able to. Only time will tell.

Other Person's Response: If you do produce some awesome compositions, then many people would expect you, the artist, to be an amazing person who lives by a great philosophy. It would be quite ironic if someone with a weak philosophy, such as yourself, produces awesome and powerful compositions.

My Reply: It's said that many great artists have ironic qualities about them.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy is very dumb, and not much thought has been put into it.

My Reply: I put a lot of thought into it, given that I've written so much material and Q&A on it.

Other Person's Response: It's as they always say: to each his own. So, for you, positive emotions are what give beauty and worth to your life.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Do you think life is like a game, where those who have the most positive emotions are the winners, while those who struggle with clinical depression are the losers?

My Reply: Yes. The more positive emotions you have, the more beauty and worth your life has, which would make you a champion if you're living a very blissful life. Also, I hear people claim life is a computer simulation. If that's the case, then life would really be a game.

Other Person's Response: If spiritual believers are wrong in their beliefs, then the simulation theory would give you another hope for the existence of the afterlife because, if life is a computer simulation, then human beings might not just die, and that's it. They might live on after the simulation ends.

My Reply: Well, like I said, I'm undecided on debatable topics, including the simulation theory.

Other Person's Response: Perhaps life is a simulation. But, it's an abandoned simulation, since people are left to suffer in this world, and no programmer is there to assist these people.

My Reply: That could be. Since there aren't any strange things happening, such as objects materializing into this existence, then there might be nobody outside the simulation. There was this cartoon show called "Code Lyoko," which I used to watch when I was younger. The show is about a virtual reality inside a supercomputer, and there are characters who enter into this virtual reality. There's another character, named Jeremy Belpois

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

, who's the main operator at the supercomputer.

He assists these characters in the virtual reality by materializing things into the virtual reality, and he does other technical things. But, if the characters were to die, such as being killed by virtual monsters, they return back to the real world. So, when we die in this universe, we might return someplace else. However, living in this universe might be like those characters living in that virtual reality, with Jeremy gone.

Other Person's Response: If we were living in a simulation, then we should have amazing super powers. Life just seems too ordinary and basic to be a simulation. Human beings are ordinary creatures who don't have super powers, and are prone to all sorts of disease. So, reality seems more like actual reality than a simulation.

My Reply: You're right.

Other Person's Response: If you had the choice to abandon your family and cause them grief in order to be a dumb, happy animal who lives in the wild, or to instead be a miserable, intelligent person who'd bring his family joy, which would you choose?

My Reply: I'd choose to be that dumb, happy animal because there's nothing else that can bring my life beauty and joy besides my happiness. If I was the intelligent person, and my misery only lasted for a very short time before I was happy again, then I'd choose to be the intelligent person. That's because I'd soon be able to enjoy any intellectual endeavors I might pursue, and I'd be able to be happy and enjoy bringing my family joy. But, I wouldn't choose to live most, or my entire life, in a state of misery, unhappiness, or apathy. So, in that type of situation, I'd have to choose to be the happy, dumb animal.

Other Person's Response: If your philosophy can never change, and this is all you'll ever amount to as a person, I won't think that's pathetic, just as how I wouldn't think it's pathetic if a person wasn't any good at drawing, and could never amount to a skilled drawer.

My Reply: Yes. Some people just don't have certain talents and abilities. I don't think that should be frowned upon, since it's something they can't help. I might not have the ability to develop in terms of my philosophy, and I don't think that's something to be frowned upon either.

Other Person's Response: If a person was weak in a certain area, such as drawing, I wouldn't have any problem with that. But, having a character weakness is the worst weakness to have. That's why I wouldn't be alright with that.

My Reply: I really don't know if me having a character weakness is the reason why I have this hedonistic philosophy, or if my philosophy was right all along.

Other Person's Response: If a person was in a wheelchair and couldn't walk, then that wouldn't be pathetic, since it's something that person can't help. So, if you're incapable of developing a better philosophy, that wouldn't be pathetic either, since that's something you can't help.

My Reply: You're right.

Other Person's Response: Even my young son has a better philosophy than you! I think that's pathetic!

My Reply: Well, there are little children who can draw, and adults who can't. I wouldn't think it's pathetic that some adults can't draw. Likewise, there are some adults who can't live by a better philosophy than hedonism, while there are some little children who do. I wouldn't think that's pathetic either. Besides, there are many people in this world who have my philosophy. Since it's such a popular philosophy that many people live by, then other people should understand why I have this philosophy.

Other Person's Response: Many people, who have a hedonistic philosophy, would just simply say being happy and enjoying life is what gives life value and worth. But, they wouldn't explain why that is. You, on the other hand, explain in great detail.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: Your philosophy is like someone who's a dead piece of equipment that needs to be constantly recharged. You need to always be charged up with those positive emotions to give beauty to your life. Otherwise, that beauty is dead (gone).

My Reply: Yes. I think human beings are like appliances that need to be charged up with positive emotions. Otherwise, life has no more beauty. Human beings need to rely on positive emotions to make life beautiful, just as how an appliance needs to rely on electricity.

Other Person's Response: There are many people in this world who think they need certain things to make life valuable and worth living, whether it be money, fancy things, etc. They don't need those things. Neither do I think you require positive emotions to make your life valuable and worth living.

My Reply: I have yet to be convinced.

Other Person's Response: I really think it is a character weakness, and that a vital, precious part of you is missing, which would give you a much better philosophy.

My Reply: I don't know if that's the case.

Other Person's Response: Even strong people have their weaknesses. So, you have your strengths and weaknesses, while other people have their strengths and weaknesses.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: It would be pathetic if this is all you can amount to as a human being.

My Reply: Well, each person has his unfortunate lot in life. You could say it's pathetic that there are poor, starving people in other areas of the world, and that this is all their lives will amount to. But, that's something they can't help. Likewise, I can't help it if I can't improve my philosophy, certain abilities I'm lacking in, or as a person. That's just my unfortunate lot in life, and there's nothing I can do about it. Life's a cruel joke for some people, and I'd be one of those people.

Other Person's Response: There are certain abilities you can improve though.

My Reply: Yes. But, I can't improve all abilities I'm lacking in. My philosophy would be one of those things I don't think I can improve.

Other Person's Response: I find your philosophy very depressing. It sounds like a philosophy a depressed person would have. Do you have this philosophy only during your moments of depression and despair? Or, do you have it, even during moments where you're happy?

My Reply: I have this philosophy all the time, even during moments where I'm happy.

Other Person's Response: You don't have a philosophy founded upon knowledge and experience. Your philosophy is instead founded upon emotions. Since your whole philosophy is founded upon emotions, then that makes it an irrational philosophy.

My Reply: Well, I'm just sharing my personal views and experiences.

Other Person's Response: Would you prefer a life of perfection, where science has greatly advanced in technology and cures?

My Reply: Yes, definitely. I'd prefer to live in an era that's thousands of years from now, as opposed to the era I'm living in now. I'd prefer to live in a utopia world, where life is happy all the time. Also, I like to keep myself in good health, I like to keep my video game systems and discs in good condition, and I'd prefer life itself to be good in general, where I have no suffering, unhappiness, or diseases.

Other Person's Response: So, you'd prefer a life where everything works out in your favor?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I'm an emotional theorist, and you say there are people claiming emotions aren't the source of value, how we love, have pride, and perceive beauty, greatness, or horror. Who are these people?

My Reply: In that Emotional Perception Theory of Value link I gave earlier, there was someone who disagreed that emotions are perceptions of value. This was the person trying to prove emotion theorists wrong. There are also many other people who disagree emotions are perceptions of value, how we love, etc. That's just the way the world works. When it comes to any idea, you'll have many people agreeing, and many people disagreeing. Not everyone agrees that emotions are the source of value and worth in our lives. Some people would even say it's a character weakness to rely on emotions as a source of value and worth.

Other Person's Response: Emotions aren't strength or power at all. To rely on them as a source of strength, power, and value is nothing but weakness.

My Reply: Would we say that an explosion is weak and nothing powerful? No. The fact is, it's still a powerful, natural phenomenon. So, emotions are still powerful things, regardless of how they're used, or if they're solely relied upon as a source of value. Besides, I personally think emotions are the only strength a person can have. When you have no emotions, you can't have any motivation to exercise or do anything. Neither can you have any value and worth in your life. So, emotions do give us that strength of motivation, value, and worth in our lives. But, there are emotions that do sap our strength, such as feelings of misery, depression, and despair.

Other Person's Response: There are other strengths a person can have besides emotions. He could be smart or creative.

My Reply: But, the point I'm trying to make here is that emotions are the only form of strength that count, since they're the only way we can love, hate, have joy, have beauty and worth in our lives, etc. Like I said though, it's the positive emotions that truly count, since they're what make our lives good and beautiful.

Other Person's Response: If I were to go outside of your personal definition of strength for a moment, I could say you were a strong person for enduring those miserable struggles, and not committing suicide. Some people would say you're weak because you're allowing your misery to beat you down, and take away the beauty, goodness, and worth of your life. Even if it is the case you're allowing your emotions to overpower you, I'd still consider you a strong individual for enduring through your struggles.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

If a person was in a boxing fight, was completely overpowered by an opponent, then he'd still be strong anyway for remaining in that fight. He might've not had the strength to overcome his opponent. But, he'd still be strong for not cowering out of the ring. Since you didn't cower out of the ring (life itself) by committing suicide, then that makes you strong. But, it would be wonderful to see you become an even stronger individual by not allowing your emotions to rule and dictate your life.

My Reply: Well, I'm not sure if there is more value and worth to life than emotions. If there's not, then there's no way I can become stronger by having greater values in my life. That's because these greater values wouldn't exist, which means people would be wrong to assume there's more value to life than emotions.

Other Person's Response: In regards to the values you live by, people can either see it as a character weakness, or someone who's just very limited.

My Reply: Yes. People can call me weak and pathetic, since my positive emotions are the only things that make my life beautiful. Or, they could just think of me as a very limited human being. They could also think of me as both limited, weak, and pathetic.

Other Person's Response: Do you think people should accept and appreciate you, rather than frowning upon you or name calling you, since they think you're weak?

My Reply: Yes. There are many things about me worth appreciating.

Other Person's Response: Instead of running away from suffering and unhappiness, have a different mindset. Perhaps that will allow you to experience a new form of beauty in your life. I think you're just closing yourself off from these new experiences.

My Reply: I did have that mindset, and it did nothing for me. So, I don't think anything's going to work for me.

Other Person's Response: If your positive emotions are the only way you can love, and have beauty in your life, then you've never loved, or had any beauty in your life because positive emotions are nothing more than biochemical emotions. Things like love, beauty, goodness, and worth are not emotional things.

My Reply: I disagree. I think they are emotional.

Other Person's Response: According to you, things like beauty, goodness, and worth are things that can be taken away from us. You treat them as fleeting things.

My Reply: Correct. When you watch a movie, there's the audio component (where you hear the movie), the visual component (seeing the movie), and then there's the beauty, greatness, joy, worth, or magnificence of that movie. Any one of these components can be taken away from us. If you go deaf, you can no longer hear the movie. If you go blind, you can no longer see the movie.

But, if you lose your positive emotions, due to a mental illness or other factor, the movie would be devoid of any beauty or greatness from your perspective. Thus, the movie just becomes images, sounds, characters, scenes, and nothing more. As you can see, I think things like beauty, love, joy, and greatness are all reduced to one component, and that component would be our positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: So, according to you, we have to rely on our positive emotions to give beauty to our lives, just as how we have to rely on our sense of sight to see, and our sense of hearing to hear?

My Reply: Yes. When we lose our positive emotions, it's like losing our sight, hearing, taste, smell, hunger, or thirst because we'd lose our ability to love, have pride, joy, and see beauty in things.

Other Person's Response: For you, your emotions are perceptions of value. But, for me, my emotions aren't perceptions of value. I think that's because I'm a different person than you, and live my life differently than you. I don't live my life like a wild, hedonistic animal. I live to seek knowledge and contribute to the world. So, for me, my thoughts and beliefs are perceptions of value.

Different people will experience things differently. When you say positive emotions are the only source of beauty and goodness, that would just be your personal experience. You shouldn't project your personal experience upon everyone else, since everyone is different. As for your religion, your divine nature would be the wild, hedonistic animal. But, my divine nature would be the intellect, seeking knowledge and making the world a better place.

My Reply: Well, I could project my personal experience upon everyone else because we all need sight to see, hearing to hear, and a feeling of hunger or thirst to be hungry or thirsty. So, if I lost my hearing, reported my personal experience (which would be that I could no longer hear), and claimed that no human being can still hear if he loses his hearing, then I'd be correct.

I'd be right to project my personal experience upon everyone else. If you lose your hunger, thirst, sight, hearing, or smell, then there's no way you can still be hungry, thirsty, see, hear, or smell. The same idea applies to value. If you lose your ability to perceive value (your emotions), then you can no longer perceive value. You could, thus, no longer value anything in your life.

Other Person's Response: You're reducing all things beautiful, amazing, and worthwhile to one, single, biological component.

My Reply: Well, what biological component do people believe gives beauty and worth to life in the first place? It would be our intellect. Without our ability to think, then people believe we'd just be mindless machines, and things like beauty, love, or worth wouldn't exist. I agree intellect plays a role. But, we think certain ways, and these thoughts cause us to feel certain ways. It's the feelings (emotions) that give our lives beauty, worth, horror, or disgust. Therefore, our intellect (thinking) isn't the biological component that gives beauty to our lives. It's our positive emotions that do.

Other Person's Response: So, positive emotions are the ultimate component we need?

My Reply: Yes. They are the divine component to our very being and lives.

Other Person's Response: There is no support for the idea that our emotions determine what is good, bad, worthwhile, beautiful, or disgusting. It should also be noted that there is the proper use of biological science, and an improper use, which is becoming increasingly common these days. I can find numerous so-called public intellectuals who claim things, such as that intelligence is biologically determined, and one can't change it. This is pseudoscience. It's a claim made to "justify" the mistreatment of millions.

The real biology tells us that biological determinism is rare, and certainly does not occur with respect to intelligence. Hundreds of genes are involved, all contributing a small amount, and their contribution is dependent upon the environment. Since, for the most part, biologists have rejected biological determinism with respect to such things as intellect and behavior, I fail to see how we could ever have a biological determinism regarding either values or morality.

My Reply: My personal experience tells me otherwise in regards to emotions. I've had very profound, powerful experiences in my life that were horrible, beautiful, etc. These experiences were clearly emotional states I was in.

Other Person's Response: You say that, even when you're apathetic (emotionless), you're still able to determine the type of emotion any given artwork conveys. I think it requires some level of emotion to make this determination. I think it even requires some level of emotion to determine if something is good, bad, horrible, beautiful, etc.

My Reply: I'm not sure. I mean, even if I wasn't feeling hungry or thirsty, I could still look at a work of art that conveys hunger and thirst, and acknowledge that this artwork conveys hunger and thirst.

Other Person's Response: When you say you still know songs are beautiful during your misery, that's just you knowing they used to be beautiful to you in the past, when you felt beauty while listening to them. But, that beauty is completely absent for you during your miserable struggles, which means all you're left with is just the knowledge that those songs used to be beautiful to you.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: If it's possible to still determine that certain things are beautiful or disgusting without emotions, then that says emotions aren't the only value judgments, since you can still judge through your way of thinking.

My Reply: I'd still have to say emotions are the only value judgments, just like how I'd still have to say the feeling of hunger is the only hunger. So, when determining if something is beautiful or disgusting without emotions, I'd have to define that as being nothing more than just a determination. But, I wouldn't say it's a value judgment.

Other Person's Response: Emotion theorists have the same philosophy as you, and there are very intelligent emotional theorists out there who could come up with good, intelligent arguments to support your position/philosophy.

My Reply: Yes. But, the difference between me, and these emotional theorists, is that I have a religious form of their philosophy.

Other Person's Response: Could you show me an emotional theorist who thinks positive emotions are the only things that make life beautiful and worth living?

My Reply: Sure, I'll share the link to a post of someone, on a science forum, who has the same philosophy as me. This is someone who had a discussion with me:

A biological deterministic view of good and bad

Other Person's Response: Maybe you just need more power and control over your emotions. If you're in physical pain, do you wallow in your pain? If so, that's because you don't have much power and control. Your physical pain dominates you, and your emotions do, too.

My Reply: I do wallow when I'm in physical pain.

Other Person's Response: You say emotions are biochemical-based. Then, you say they're forces of light and darkness, received by our brains. You can't have both!

My Reply: Spiritual believers would say, even though our brains work by means of biochemicals, they're also receivers.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: I've heard that, without emotions, we'd be machines, and our lives would be devoid of any love, joy, value, and worth.

My Reply: Yes. As a matter of fact, I think certain shows and movies already depict this.

Other Person's Response: I think there are two forms of loving and craving. The first would be emotional, such as if you were craving adventure, or loving your soul mate. The other form would be your taste buds craving and loving certain foods.

My Reply: But, the form of loving and craving that's not emotional doesn't give any beauty, goodness, or worth to our lives. It's nothing more than just a sensual experience. Like I said, it can only be emotions that give our lives beauty, disgust, etc. Even if the non-emotional form of love and craving was triggered by thoughts or beliefs of beauty and worth, it still wouldn't give any beauty and worth to our lives. Thoughts and beliefs of beauty and worth can only become the experience of beauty and worth for us through emotions, and not through taste, smell, hearing, etc.

Other Person's Response: I realize you're fed up with this idea that there's more beauty and goodness to life than positive emotions because this idea puts you in a position where, if you lose your positive emotions, then you'd be living by a false definition of beauty and goodness.

My Reply: Yes. Thus, I'm not afraid to share and express my philosophy to others, regardless of how much it offends people.

Other Person's Response: You may be fed up with and tired of this whole idea that there's more beauty to life than positive emotions. But, I bet you'd never be fed up and tired of an eternally blissful life.

My Reply: Correct. How could I ever be fed up with and tired of a life that has an eternal amount of beauty, love, joy, and worth? Things like beauty, good, and joy are the most important things we need. So, how could I ever grow tired of them?

Other Person's Response: You're saying, even if you lived for millions of years, and had nothing but a positive experience for all those years, you'd never tire of that?

My Reply: Correct. I could never grow tired of a positive experience.

Other Person's Response: I think the self (ego) and consciousness are an illusion. That means your mental states (inner experiences) are illusory. Suffering is an illusion, and happiness is an illusion.

My Reply: I've had some very powerful and profound experiences in my life, whether they were beautiful, horrible, or disturbing experiences. I don't think such experiences can be dismissed as illusory. They were the real deal. So, I disagree with your entire statement.

Other Person's Response: I thought you were undecided on debatable topics. So, how do you know consciousness isn't illusory?

My Reply: I really don't know if it's illusory or not. But, it just doesn't seem illusory.

Other Person's Response: Since you're undecided on debatable topics, then you should remain undecided as to whether your translation of emotions into perceptions of value actually proves the emotional perception theory of value or not.

My Reply: Yes. You're right.

Other Person's Response: Personally, I think the self and consciousness aren't illusory. By treating them as illusory, you're dismissing them completely. Thus, you will deny any experience you have as being beautiful, disturbing, powerful, or profound, since such experiences don't exist.

My Reply: Yes. Also, if you treat yourself and your own mental states (experiences) as though they don't exist, then you might as well treat others and their experiences as though they don't exist.

Other Person's Response: You are ruled and controlled by your ego, and emotions. I think it's time for you to overcome this.

My Reply: As for the ego, I think that's meant to be a part of us. Without that, then it would be an unnatural, disturbing image, such as a headless animal. The head was meant to be a part of that animal. Without its head, then it becomes unnatural and disturbing. So, without our ego, then we'd, in a way, be like headless animals, living our lives. It would be like a headless chicken that's still alive.

Now, there are some spiritual beliefs that attempt to transcend the ego, such as Buddhism. But, then there are other spiritual beliefs, such as New Age Spirituality, that embrace the ego and the Law of Attraction (which claims you can get what you want if you set your mind and actions to it). Buddhism is the opposite, since it attempts to transcend the things we want.

I personally think life was meant to be a place for the things we want and our own happiness. That's the ideal life. It's a cursed existence to live an unhappy, miserable life, and to not get the things you want. That's why I consider my mother's life of poverty to be a cursed existence. I've had many miserable struggles, and that was a cursed existence as well.

Other Person's Response: I get it. You're like the opposite of a Buddhist.

My Reply: Yes. My spiritual beliefs oppose Buddhism.

Other Person's Response: Buddhism is all about eliminating suffering and hate. According to your philosophy, Buddhists shouldn't just aim for an absence of suffering and hate. They should aim for the opposite of it, which would be a state of joy, love, etc. In other words, they should aim for those positive emotions.

My Reply: Yes. Even if you had no suffering and hate, being in an apathetic state is still no way to live or be an artist. That's why you need positive emotions. In a way, I guess my philosophy is sort of like Buddhism, since its aim is to also eliminate suffering and hate. But, my philosophy takes it a step further, and says you should also aim for the opposite, which would be the positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: There are the colors black, white, and gray. Black could represent suffering and hate, white could represent joy and love, while gray could represent apathy. Gray is not the opposite of white or black. It's in between. Since black or gray is not a good or beautiful place to be, then I agree that the goal of any human being should be to reach for the white, and to avoid black and gray.

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: You've learned, through your struggles, that positive emotions are the only things that make life beautiful, and that they're the ultimate reason for living. I think you've learned the wrong life lesson. Your struggles, therefore, haven't enlightened you one bit.

My Reply: Who knows, I might've been enlightened to the truth, and many people deny this truth.

Other Person's Response: If the Law of Attraction was real, then I should have the powers of Superman if I wanted to.

My Reply: The Law of Attraction could be real, but has limitations. In other words, there are certain things you can get if you want them. Then, there are things you can't get, such as the powers of Superman.

Other Person's Response: I believe there are heavenly, spiritual beings who love us. They want us to let go of things, such as fear, hate, worry, and ego.

My Reply: I'd certainly want to let go of any worry, since holding onto a worry would only cause me misery. I'd also not want any feelings of hate, despair, fear, etc. in my life. But, as for my ego, I'm not concerned about giving that up. I'll just live my selfish, hedonistic life without caring what others think. You claim these spiritual beings exist, and that they want me to transcend my ego. But, I just don't care about transcending my ego. I mean, would a narcissist care about transcending his ego?

Besides, I have no idea whether these beings actually exist or not, and if they really want me to transcend my ego or not. For all we know, they might exist, and they might want me to further embrace my ego. After all, different people have different lessons/journeys. So, for me, I might be encouraged, by these beings, to embrace my ego. But, I really don't know. So, I'll just carry on with my usual life. When I die, then, if I meet these beings, I'll see what they have to say to me. I'll also see what new knowledge and experiences I'll acquire upon meeting them.

Other Person's Response: Would you be willing to transcend your ego if it was the only way to change your life for the better? Let's pretend you were unhappy, and nothing could better your life but transcending your ego. Then, would you do that?

My Reply: Yes. But, as long as it's unnecessary, then I'm not going to do it.

Other Person's Response: I think you're just attached to your positive emotions, and that's why they're the only source of beauty, love, and joy in your life. I think you need to let go of this attachment.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that's the case.

Other Person's Response: What if I didn't want to have riches, happiness, or any fancy things?

My Reply: Then that's something you want, since you'd want to live a life of poverty and unhappiness. Would you be upset if you got happiness, riches, and fancy things handed to you? Would that be a cursed existence to you? If so, then you clearly wanted to live a life of no riches, fancy things, or happiness.

Other Person's Response: Are you a spoiled person who demands a lot of things?

My Reply: No. I don't ask for much, I don't have a spoiled personality, and neither do I throw tantrums. The main thing I need is my positive emotions. There are also a few other things I need, such as video games, the internet, a computer, magnetic healing rings, etc. I wouldn't even put my positive emotions within the category of electronics, or any other product, since positive emotions are divine. They are the ultimate reason for living, and products are just items you need. I mean, without my positive emotions, then all products would hold no beauty, goodness, or worth to me.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: Even if you couldn't enjoy and be happy with a product, it was still worth money. That says products still have worth, regardless how you feel about them.

My Reply: Well, if you purchased a product, and you didn't have your positive emotions, then the product wasn't worth the buy. It wasn't worth forking over any money at all. It doesn't matter, even if it was the most luxurious vacation or home; none of those things would be worth a single penny without positive emotions. So, I think one's ability to enjoy and have fun is the only thing that makes products, homes, and vacations beautiful, good, and of worth.

Other Person's Response: This worry of yours, which is about near death experiences, is in regards to worrying about what could happen to yourself. You're worried about the possibility of having a horrible experience. This is what Buddhists mean when they say the ego causes suffering.

My Reply: Yes. Fortunately, I'm almost fully recovered from this emotional crisis.

Other Person's Response: Why would these beings, if they're so loving, want you to embrace your ego? Apparently, your ego is causing you suffering, since you're worried about having that horrible experience during a near death situation.

My Reply: Well, there are ways the ego serves an advantage, such as not listening to the cruel opinions of others, doing things your way, and not being a slave to others, etc. So, I think these beings would want me to embrace my ego in this manner.

Other Person's Response: In regards to your mother's life of poverty, does she feel negative emotions all the time about her life of poverty? Do you feel negative emotions about that?

My Reply: My mother, whose name is Cara, does feel negative emotions much of the time about it. My grandmother (my mother's mother), whose name is Carol, is cruel to her, slave drives her, and only buys her cheap things, while she gets all the nice, expensive things. Grandma has a lot of money, while mom is left with little money. Mom has to get some money from grandma for food and things like this. But, grandma has all the money, and gives very little to mom. Mom says grandma has always hated her for no reason, and that she has abused her.

My mom isn't abusive towards me or my younger brother. But, grandma was abusive towards my mom. I live with my mother, and I don't live with grandma. Now, I don't feel negative emotions about this whole situation of my mother and grandma, nor the fact that I live a bit of a poor life. I just go about my daily life, having fun playing video games, while my mother feels all the rage. I personally don't mind living a bit of a poor life, where I don't always get the fancy things I want. As long as I'm happy and enjoying my life, then my life's all good. Sure, there was one time I wanted to get a new, fancy, hdtv.

My mother couldn't afford it, and I felt a little disappointed. But, that feeling soon went away, and I was fine. However, I think my mother might come into a home equity loan, which will give her a decent amount of money. That will allow her to afford the hdtv, along with the new Nintendo system (the Nintendo Switch). If, for whatever reason, she won't get this loan, then I'll be fine sticking with playing my old games on my old tv. However, even though my grandma doesn't buy my mom much things, grandma has been known to buy fancy things for me.

So, she might buy me that new hdtv, and the Nintendo Switch for my birthday or Christmas, if my mother doesn't get the loan. When my mother's birthday comes around, my grandma doesn't buy her anything. If she does buy her something, it would be something cheap. So, grandma likes me, for whatever reason, and hates my mother. Take note that, grandma doesn't buy expensive things for me all the time. Grandma has also been known to buy expensive things for my mother's brother. His name is Shane.

Other Person's Response: When your mother dies, are you supposed to live with grandma?

My Reply: No. My mother told me not to, since grandma would slave drive me and my younger brother. Grandma would also treat me and my brother cruelly.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother have a car?

My Reply: Grandma used to loan her one she had. But, mom got in a wreck with it, and grandma doesn't want to get her another one. My mother is hardly injured, since the wreck wasn't that bad. But, now she has no car, and my grandma is getting a new car all for herself. Therefore, my grandma has to drive us around. My mother is also taking the bus now.

Other Person's Response: Are you sure you don't feel negative emotions about your mother's predicament? You're saying you don't care at all?

My Reply: First of all, when she feels rage, things have sometimes been known to work in her favor. She said spiritual forces were working in her favor when she felt rage. That's why she did get the house put in her name. So, when my mother feels rage, I actually feel good from that (providing I have my positive emotions), since it's quite possible her rage would allow her to win the lottery. If she does win the lottery, then that would be extremely rare.

It would be like a miracle, which means there might really be spiritual forces working in her favor. That would give me hope that supernatural forces and the afterlife are real. I still wouldn't know for sure if those things exist. But, it would bring me even more hope that they do exist. After all, if they do exist, that means we're immortal spirits, and that there's a blissful afterlife. I'd love to live such a life, where I can be happy all I want, and get everything I want.

Other Person's Response: What if there is no soul, afterlife, and this is the only life we have? If you were convinced of this, then how would you feel when your mother feels rage?

My Reply: I'd still feel good from her rage because, if what you're saying is true, then that means life is a cruel joke. I'd want such a life to be given all the hate and rage it deserves. That's what makes me feel good when others feel rage in regards to the unfairness of life. Now, if the soul and afterlife do exist, and this life is still a cruel joke, where we don't always get what we want, then, again, such a life deserves all the rage it can get, since it's unfair for us as human beings. Thus, I'd still feel good from her rage. I, myself, wouldn't feel rage when I'm happy and enjoying my life. But, I'd still feel good from others having rage in regards to this cruel joke of a life.

Other Person's Response: If your mother wins a lot of money, that would make you feel good, since you get to buy the things you want? But, if your mother doesn't, and she still has financial misfortunes that cause her to feel rage, you'd still feel good about that because life deserves all the rage it can get, since it's a cruel joke of a life that gives us pointless suffering, and bad luck?

My Reply: Yes. In both situations, I'd feel good, providing I have my ability to feel good.

Other Person's Response: When your grandma dies, will your mother celebrate?

My Reply: Yes. She said she'd sell grandma's house for money.

Other Person's Response: I believe in the Law of Attraction. It allows people to have their spiritual desires fulfilled. So, maybe, your grandma is having her desires fulfilled. She wants your mother to suffer a life of poverty and not win the lottery. Maybe that's why your mother isn't winning any big money. But, perhaps your mother can make the Law of Attraction work on her side somehow.

My Reply: Maybe she can.

Other Person's Response: Does your mother do spells to curse grandma to die?

My Reply: Yes. But, she hasn't died yet.

Other Person's Response: If someone curses another person to die, and that person dies, I don't think he'd go to prison because there's no way to prove that he killed that person.

My Reply: Yes. But, if it was proven that curses exist, then people would be going to prison if they curse others to die, and they died. It would be a spiritual crime.

Other Person's Response: Since your mother does spells, then maybe you can ask her to do spells that would heal you of this recent worry you're having, which would restore your joy back to you.

My Reply: I haven't asked her yet, since the idea has never occurred to me. So, perhaps I should. But, I am very close to a full recovery from this worry.

Other Person's Response: In regards to the Law of Attraction, it's only those people are very loving, compassionate, and positive who attract the most wealth, fortunes, etc. into their lives. Maybe your mother isn't attracting money into her life because she's not much of a loving person. If she were to grow in love and compassion, she'd be attracting a lot of money and fortunes into her life.

My Reply: Although my mother doesn't love people much, since she easily becomes hateful and violent, and wishes death upon people who give her the slightest problems, I'm not sure if this is the cause of her financial misfortunes. Some spiritual force could be stopping her from earning a lot of money. Or, maybe, spiritual things don't exist, and she's just plain unlucky.

Other Person's Response: If someone told your mother to love her enemies, would that make her angry?

My Reply: Yes. Definitely.

Other Person's Response: Personally, I don't think your mother needs money when she has you and your younger brother. Who needs money when you have a family? There are poor, starving people out there who accept their life of poverty. They have love and compassion towards each other, and that's all they really need. I think your mother needs to spiritually grow as a person, and give up her materialistic desire for money.

My Reply: I don't agree. She shouldn't give up on trying to earn money.

Other Person's Response: If your mother doesn't win any big money, then maybe it's because there is no supernatural, and the Law of Attraction doesn't exist. Maybe this is the only life we have and, once we die, that's it. This would mean winning the lottery is nothing but pure luck, and there are no spiritual forces to help anybody win.

My Reply: That could be. Now, I'd like to say something about my mother not having a car. Grandma did actually decide to loan her one of her cars. Mom is trying to get that car put in her name.

 

[The Transcended Omniverse]

Other Person's Response: Buddhists say to give up our desires. Wanting your life to have beauty, goodness, joy, and worth is a desire. So, not only do Buddhists give up their ego, but they also give up things like beauty, joy, and worth. They live life as it is, and they don't need any of those things.

My Reply: Then I'm afraid they're giving up their true divine nature and purpose. Like I said, that's just no way to live, and such a life amounts to nothing. It's unacceptable. Our divine purpose as human beings is to have that positivity in our lives (that beauty, joy, love, worth, etc.). That's why we need our positive emotions.

Other Person's Response: Buddhists have their idea of a divine or grand purpose (which is to transcend desire, and achieve a higher state of being). You have your idea of a divine or grand purpose, which is to feel positive emotions. Your idea promotes one having fun and enjoying his life, while Buddhists advocate things like meditation, practice, and giving up one's desires. I can see there's a conflict of ideas here. Buddhists might preach their doctrine to you, while you might preach your doctrine to them.

My Reply: Correct. I also have my own idea of a higher state of being. I think positive emotions are the only higher state of being. They're the real divine consciousness. I disagree with the Buddhists' notion of divine consciousness.

Other Person's Response: Buddhists go through years of practice and meditation to obtain, what they think is, the divine state. But, you're saying the real divine state was right there all long, and it was simply being happy, feeling love, feeling beauty, and enjoying life.

My Reply: Correct. There's no need to look any further than positive emotions because they're the ultimate reason for living and pursuing any goal or dream. So, we had a divine state all along, which means there's no reason to go through practice and meditation to obtain some fake divine state.

Other Person's Response: I think I know why you live by these emotional based values. Someone like you, who never undergoes meditation, will be mentally wild, uncontrolled, and unstable. Meditation helps create a balanced, controlled, stable psyche.

My Reply: I'm not sure if it's me being mentally unbalanced that makes my positive emotions the only things that make my life beautiful. Or, if it's because positive emotions really are the only things that make life beautiful. As for meditation, I'm not interested in that. If it was my only option, then I'd have to go through with it. I'm just interested in living my hedonistic lifestyle I've always lived.

I'm basically someone who's not interested in anything else, other than having fun, enjoying my life, and doing the hobbies I want to do. I really don't want to meet the standards and expectations of others by living my life doing other things, whether it be becoming a father and taking care of children, doing Buddhist practice and meditation, living my life helping humanity, etc. I ignore the opinions and attitudes of others, and just live how I want to live.

Other Person's Response: If you've never been a father, then you'll never understand the value and worth of taking care of a child, even when you're feeling unhappy.

My Reply: Even if I was a father, I might still have the same philosophy, which means me feeling happy would still be the only thing that would make taking care of a child something beautiful, good, and worthwhile. In addition, I'd still only be able to love the child if I felt love (a positive emotion).

Other Person's Response: If you were a father, and you're philosophy still stands, then you're unfit to be a parent. As a matter of fact, you're unfit for life itself with such a philosophy. A relationship, or family, founded upon such a philosophy would be a defective, unhealthy, unbalanced relationship or family.

My Reply: Just because my philosophy isn't compatible with life itself doesn't make my philosophy false. Plenty of things just don't work out in this life. But, that doesn't make those things false. For example, our physical bodies won't last. They will eventually grow old and die. They're also prone to all sorts of diseases. That means our bodies don't work out too well in this life. But, that doesn't make it untrue.

That doesn't mean aging is a lie, we're all immortal, and that we can never have a physical illness. Just because having vulnerable, mortal bodies is something that wouldn't be very compatible with the life we live doesn't mean it's false. Likewise, just because my philosophy wouldn't be very compatible with life doesn't mean it's false. Mortality, and my philosophy, would both be unpleasant concepts for many people as well. But, that doesn't make them false.

Other Person's Response: What type of girl would you be attracted to? I bet you'd be attracted to the happy, joyful type, rather than the tough, brutal type.

My Reply: That's correct. I'd be attracted to a girl who's young, happy, love-crazy, and joyful. I wouldn't be attracted to an old, tough, brutal woman. I'd also be attracted to a blissful, utopia life, rather than a tough, brutal life. Hence the reason why I talk about wanting this life to be a utopia. As for having a girlfriend, I don't want the responsibility of having one. I prefer to just live my personal life, where I have all the free time to do what I want. Besides, a relationship wouldn't work out for me anyway because my philosophy wouldn't be compatible.

Other Person's Response: This life is filled with hardship, and calls for a race of tough people. Weak people like you won't make it in this world!

My Reply: It would be nice if the tough people could live the brutal life they want to live, while the hedonists live the nice, luxurious, utopia life they want to live. I say, do whatever works for the individual, rather than trying to make someone live a certain way that just isn't going to work out for him/her. I'm not sure if living my life by non-hedonistic values, or the "tough man's values," will ever work for me. I don't think such values are real, anyway.

Other Person's Response: So, you'd choose to be a happy, dumb cow, rather than someone who faces and endures miserable hardships?

My Reply: Yes.

Other Person's Response: I value things through my thoughts and beliefs, while you value things through your emotions. Therefore, I conclude that your brain is wired differently. Sadly, your brain is wired for failure because positive emotions are very fleeting things, unlike the value founded upon thoughts and beliefs, which would be an everlasting value in one's life.

My Reply: I'm not sure, but maybe you're right about my brain being wired this way.

Other Person's Response: If your brain is wired like this, then I think this wiring is permanent for some people. For example, some drug addicts, who've wired their brains this way, would always require euphoric highs to give great beauty, goodness, and worth to their lives. I don't think such wiring can be undone in some cases.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that's true or not. I don't know if I've wired my brain permanently like this, or if positive emotions really were perceptions of beauty, goodness, and worth all along.

Other Person's Response: If your brain is permanently wired like a drug addict's, then that would be very unfortunate, since you'd only have one thing (your positive emotions) to make your life positive.

My Reply: Yes. God and these spiritual beings would not only have allowed me to suffer here on Earth, but they'd also allow me to live such an unfortunate life.

Other Person's Response: Maybe your brain has been wired (conditioned) in such a way that value and emotions have become the same experience for you. Perhaps the brains of other people are wired differently than yours, and that's why they can perceive value in their lives independently of their emotions.

My Reply: I'm not sure if that's true.

Other Person's Response: Would you consider yourself to be a health freak?

My Reply: No. That's because I don't take health to the extreme. I just keep myself in average, good health. Take note that, if I didn't have my positive emotions, then it wouldn't be classified as "good" health from my perspective, since positive emotions are the only real source of goodness. So, instead of saying good health, we'd say health at a certain level.

Other Person's Response: Even though you're someone who keeps his body healthy, you didn't keep your thoughts healthy. That's why you had all these miserable struggles.

My Reply: Yes. These thoughts and worries caused me much emotional suffering and misery.

Other Person's Response: Would you consider your unhealthy thought processes to be the worst, unhealthy habit you could have? At least with other unhealthy habits, such as ones that are bad for your body, your body can be in poor condition, but you're still happy, and your life is still beautiful and worth living.

My Reply: I do consider my unhealthy thought processes to be the worst, unhealthy habit I could have. Having such a habit only keeps me away from the experience of beauty, love, and joy I need in my life. So, I'd consider that to be a horrible habit.

Other Person's Response: I heard there are drugs that don't harm you. They are certain psychedelic drugs.

My Reply: I wouldn't take them anyway. Besides, it's possible to have a bad drug trip, and I wouldn't want to have a trip where I experience something that's just as horrible, or even worse than, those crippled states I've had in my nightmares. I talk about them here in this packet, as well as in my Recent Crisis Packet.

Other Person's Response: In regards to drug trips, people do re-experience horrible forms of suffering during a bad trip, whether it be an emotional crisis, or physical torture. People also have new, horrible experiences during a bad trip. So, it might be possible that your worry would come true in regards to drug trips. Even if the person is happy and doing just fine before he takes the drug, he might still have such a bad trip.

My Reply: In which case, I wouldn't want to take any drugs. Neither would I ever want to have a near death experience, where I go on a trip/journey. During near death experiences, people do experience something similar to a drug trip. So, when I say I wouldn't want to have a near death experience, I'm actually referring to those trips/journeys.