Greetings all. I am a new user here in the forums and I am hoping to strike up some intellectually fruitful conversations here. Allow me, if you will, to begin launch such endeavor (pardon me if this is not the appropriate section for this topic).
Very often it is said in the web that "there are no good arguments against same-sex marriage that aren't religious." You will find sentiments like these are prevalent in the internet. Many are also convinced that individuals who oppose same-sex marriage do so "because they are mean" or "because they hate gay people" or "because they are bigots," etc.
And I invite you to present compelling evidences that opponents of "gay marriage" are not bigots or religiously motivated...
I think, however, that, most of the time, these accusations are simply false.
Well, duh... bigots never see themselves as being so...
("I have nothing against colored people, as long as they know their place...")...*face palm*
I think you will find that most people who oppose same-sex marriage oppose it on the grounds that they think it is pernicious (be it socially pernicious, morally pernicious, etc.).
Oh, you mean "bigots", ok...
Take me, for example. I don't oppose same-sex marriage because "I am mean" nor because "I hate gay people" nor "because I am a bigot." I oppose same-sex marriage on various grounds. For one, I think that instituting same-sex marriage (and so same-sex parenting which follows from this) is going to prove to be pernicious socially. I am also opposed to same-sex marriage because the position of the same-sex marriage advocate is either incoherent or inchoate. I also think that there are quite good essentialistc arguments that purport to demonstrate that homosexual sexual acts are immoral. And so on.
OK. sounds nearly coherent, except that lacking of any compelling evidences or examples on your part exempting... "I really really feel it's kinda really really bad"... because...
In this thread, I'd like to start a dialogue on these matters. I'd like to first attempt to allay some misundertandings and question-begging that pervade the same-sex marriage dialogue vis-a-vis an analogy. Then, I'd like to present an argument that purports to demonstrate that the position of the advocate of same-sex marriage is incoherent or inchoate by way of an Argument from Consistency. I'd like to save the rest of the matters that I alluded to in the beginning for later discussion in separate thread(s).
Fair enough...
So, without further ado:
Clarification on the Marriage Dialogue:
Supporters of same-sex marriage typically allege that it is "not equal" to deny, say, to men to "marry" one another or allege that not allowing, say, two men or two women to marry is but allowing a man and a woman to marry is "discriminatory."
Let's begin here then. IS is, or is it not? Do you see discrimination here. as exampled, or not?
However, in doing so, they subtly (and often unknowingly) beg the question by assuming that marriage really is just people liking each other a lot and committing to one another. What marriage is is the only really relevant question that needs to be answered when discussing gay marriage, and defenders of gay marriage, when making this appeal, already assume two homosexuals marrying on quotee another is valid, the real issue in contention, before the debate even gets started.
Wow. OK then...define for all for time everlasting then... the definitive definition of "marriage" as tou claim to understand it to mean?
Now, do read the following carefully so as to not misrepresent or misunderstand me:
Heavens no...
If marriage really is, as the supporter of same-sex marriage alleges, just people liking each other a lot and committing to one another, then they would be correct in saying that "marriage," as such, would be discriminatory and unequal if persons of the same sex were not allowed to "marry" one another, for there would be no basis to not allow, say, Fred and Bob, or Mary and Courtney, or Fred, Mary, Courtney and Bob to "marry" one another if marriage is just people liking each other a lot and committing to one another.
Perhaps those folks that have remained in a committed and sustained relationship
over 30 years might categorize a symbiotic relationship and shared ideals/goals/outcomes as a bit more that "liking" the other person (not, of course, to be confused with the 3 week
everlasting "true romance" imbroglios that only hetero couples at age 17 can account as "true love"), perhaps then Fred and Bob might repent and send the Almighty a letter of apology for their 30 years of commitment to one another, bowing to the 48 hors of "true love" that Vegas seems to sprout like kudzu...
If only...
In other words, the supporter of same-sex marriage commits himself to the supposition that being "lovingly committed" or something to the effect is a sufficient condition for marriage.
It's not? Maybe that might explain the 50%+ divorce rate amongst hetero couples then?
If that is indeed what marriage is (namely, people simply being "lovingly committed" to one another), then it would then be discriminatory for the state to prohibit, say, two men or two women from "marrying" as they could certainly meet the sufficient condition of being "lovingly committed" to one another. Discrimination, in a sense, is the treating of similar things differently.
Agreed. We certainly would not wish to condone marriage, much less allow marriage, to be left in the hands of silly bubble headed people of any age, background, ethnicity, religion, or tastes in fried foods. We need the wise and experienced, um, you know, people like you to render judgement and unbiased opinion on such matters...
Similarly, if, as I am convinced of, marriage really exists to attach mothers and fathers to their children and to one another, upon whose stability the children depend, then you can see why it makes perfect sense to restrict two individuals of the same sex to "marry" as they cannot, in principle, fulfill the public purpose of marriage so construed.
So, please define what the "public purpose of marriage" must be to two folks in love that are 80+ years of age...
It would likewise be erroneous to assert that marriage, so understood, would be "unequal" or otherwise "discriminatory" insofar as every single individual would have the exact same rights and restrictions regarding whom they can marry, regardless of their sexual orientation, namely, that any individual can marry someone of the opposite sex (plus some other qualifications).
It would? Interesting... but do continue...
So understood, gay people are not being discriminated against (at least in this area), nor are they being denied the right to marry. They can marry. They're absolutely free to marry. They, just like any other human being, have to find someone of the opposite sex to marry. It would be discriminatory to deny a gay man the right to wed a woman (that is, marry) simply because he was gay, sure, but a person is not discriminated against if the state says no one has access to something that isn't real or something that no one can have access to.
*face palm*
You DO understand, do you not... that the good ole U.S. of A., is first and foremost a nation of laws, established/enforced by citizens, and not imposed by adherents of specific religious beliefs or generalized nutjubs, correct? This may tend to explain why lynch mobs and the KKK do NOT exemplify ideals of democracy or protections of individual civil liberties...
So clearly, the fundamental, important question that concerns the same-sex marriage debate (and marriage generally) is what marriage is for? or what is marriage?
OK, so...it is...
Only after we answer this question can we then see what would count as discrimination and what would not. And after answering this question, then the next matter that needs to be resolved is what is the public function that marriage, so understood, serves to compel the state to confer it?
Awww. No definition? I'm so confused...
Hopefully this will help to guide the discourse on marriage and same-sex marriage into more fruitful grounds.
Well, you are of no help so far... but hey, who knows...
Now, I'd like to present the Argument from Consistency Contra same-sex marriage:
Oh goody...
Argument from Consistency Contra Same-Sex Marriage:
- If one accepts the proposal that marriage, as the supporter of same-sex marriage alleges, is merely the recognizing of individuals who are "lovingly committed to one another," then logic demands that you accept a "marriage" between 9 men and 9 women who are "lovingly committed" to one another, or a "marriage" between 1 man and 18 women who are "lovingly committed" to one another, or a "marriage" between a man and his sister who are "lovingly committed" to one another, or a "marriage" between a woman and his grandson and his cousin who are "lovingly committed" to one another, or indeed any conceivable configuration of individuals who are "lovingly committed" to one another.