Lester Freamon
mishy gishy gushy mushy
I notice that many blacks in America place religion very close to their hearts. It is rare you ever meet a black agnostic or atheist, and that really interests me. As a black man myself, I think a part of this is due to a few factors:
1. A giant part of the culture is likely branded from the slavery days when we blacks were unable to live normal lives in America; religion stood as the driving force for being able to live a brand new day. What's more, the Africans that were brought over via ship were likely highly spiritual and religious to begin with, so our acceptance of Christianity was probably natural - a part from the fact it was "spread" to us by the end of a gun barrel.
Likewise, even if you aren't Christian, it seems commonplace and acceptable to religious in SOME way within our community. Somehow, atheism is seen parallel to satanism.
2. Peer pressure. Many blacks in America are raised in the Christian church and for many, it's all we know. We are blind to it and accept it without question. I think that due to this, there are far more atheist/agnostics in the black community than many think, but either we are unwilling to accept it or not aware of non-faith as an option.
3. Our mothers. Black American society tends to be more matriarch in nature than patriarch, mostly due to the lack of fathers and split families during the slavery days. What's interesting is that, black females tend to be far more into the religion than the males. Most dudes I knew and still know don't really care about church or religion; they're quite neutral. But they still go to appease mommy, and continue to label themselves as Christians despite all signs pointing otherwise.
I went through this as I gravitated towards atheism, myself. When I told my mom once that I probably didn't believe Jesus was the son of God and that I don't fit under the Christian umbrella, she cried. She asked what she did wrong as a parent, and said she failed me. I didn't understand it, but if there's one thing I won't do is lie to myself because my family thinks I should be something I'm not. I think a lot of black men are in similar situations, because I know for sure a good amount would rather watch football than go to church.
What's more interesting is that I think religion (or to be more accurate, Christianity) is probably one of the major things that crafts black culture today; ranging from homophobia ("No Homo") to the ever long obsession with death and the after life rather than changing one's life for the better, these issues are big problems for me, personally.
Which brings me to my final question: if anyone here labels themselves as a black atheist, how did you personally arrive at this destination? What drove you to non-theism? Surely it wasn't an easy one? Mine was painful and yet relieving all the same.
I was born and raised in Texas, which is pretty damn religious. I think it was when I was in 6th grade English when I realized I didn't know whether or not God existed or not. In that class we studied Greek mythology, and quite honestly, as someone who was never able to grasp or understand the concept of "trinity" and "original sin" within the Christian faith, I thought that the stories in the Bible were just as fake as the ones in the Greek mythos we read in class, except not nearly as fun or interesting.
But I was in complete denial. Not only because it was how I was raised, but also because every black person I knew was religious, or at least carried the title. I've been convincing myself over the years that I think God exists, and it wasn't until recently I was willing to become honest with myself - I don't think God exists at all. What's funny is that, despite all of this, looking back on myself earlier in life, religion was never really relevant to me, but rather forced *upon* me. I'd rather play video games or play baseball or watch cartoons than go to church and I tried my damndest to not go week in, week out.
So why was it so damn hard for me to accept I didn't believe in God?
A part of me hoped and wished I did. It was a very superficial "relationship" and I feel many religious people feel the same way, they just, like me most of my life, are completely unwilling to admit this due to social pressure and fear of going to hell. You can't get saved if you don't play the Religion Lottery.
I couldn't really turn to anyone: my friends or my family. I don't want to break my family (mostly my mother's) heart, and I don't want to be alienated from my black friends more than I already am. I'm the guy who craps on the music my peers listen to on a regular basis because I find it degrading, for example. I guess I will always be a rebel?
I was been coping with this in a variety of ways. A few years ago I started reading up on the various faiths, convinced I was still religious or that I believed in God. I studied for about 2 years, and converted to Islam, thinking it would be the best place for my spiritual journey. I went to mosques and prayed 5 times a day, didn't eat pork and got drunk; the whole routine. And it all felt so...silly to me. I originally presumed that I was agnostic, but instead just assumed and HOPED that it was just the Christian religion. I think it's mostly because I was uncomfortable admitting this fact not only to my family but also to myself. Like realizing Santa Claus isn't who yours parents say he is.
But when I came to realize I didn't actually believe in God this past year, it finally came to be a sigh of relief and now I spend each morning excited for the new day, not because a mysterious space alien "gave" me the ability to wake up, but because life existing in the first place is a one in a billion occurrence, and I"m happy to be a part of it.
What do you all think? Has anyone had similar experiences? It doesn't matter if you're atheist or not.
1. A giant part of the culture is likely branded from the slavery days when we blacks were unable to live normal lives in America; religion stood as the driving force for being able to live a brand new day. What's more, the Africans that were brought over via ship were likely highly spiritual and religious to begin with, so our acceptance of Christianity was probably natural - a part from the fact it was "spread" to us by the end of a gun barrel.
Likewise, even if you aren't Christian, it seems commonplace and acceptable to religious in SOME way within our community. Somehow, atheism is seen parallel to satanism.
2. Peer pressure. Many blacks in America are raised in the Christian church and for many, it's all we know. We are blind to it and accept it without question. I think that due to this, there are far more atheist/agnostics in the black community than many think, but either we are unwilling to accept it or not aware of non-faith as an option.
3. Our mothers. Black American society tends to be more matriarch in nature than patriarch, mostly due to the lack of fathers and split families during the slavery days. What's interesting is that, black females tend to be far more into the religion than the males. Most dudes I knew and still know don't really care about church or religion; they're quite neutral. But they still go to appease mommy, and continue to label themselves as Christians despite all signs pointing otherwise.
I went through this as I gravitated towards atheism, myself. When I told my mom once that I probably didn't believe Jesus was the son of God and that I don't fit under the Christian umbrella, she cried. She asked what she did wrong as a parent, and said she failed me. I didn't understand it, but if there's one thing I won't do is lie to myself because my family thinks I should be something I'm not. I think a lot of black men are in similar situations, because I know for sure a good amount would rather watch football than go to church.
What's more interesting is that I think religion (or to be more accurate, Christianity) is probably one of the major things that crafts black culture today; ranging from homophobia ("No Homo") to the ever long obsession with death and the after life rather than changing one's life for the better, these issues are big problems for me, personally.
Which brings me to my final question: if anyone here labels themselves as a black atheist, how did you personally arrive at this destination? What drove you to non-theism? Surely it wasn't an easy one? Mine was painful and yet relieving all the same.
I was born and raised in Texas, which is pretty damn religious. I think it was when I was in 6th grade English when I realized I didn't know whether or not God existed or not. In that class we studied Greek mythology, and quite honestly, as someone who was never able to grasp or understand the concept of "trinity" and "original sin" within the Christian faith, I thought that the stories in the Bible were just as fake as the ones in the Greek mythos we read in class, except not nearly as fun or interesting.
But I was in complete denial. Not only because it was how I was raised, but also because every black person I knew was religious, or at least carried the title. I've been convincing myself over the years that I think God exists, and it wasn't until recently I was willing to become honest with myself - I don't think God exists at all. What's funny is that, despite all of this, looking back on myself earlier in life, religion was never really relevant to me, but rather forced *upon* me. I'd rather play video games or play baseball or watch cartoons than go to church and I tried my damndest to not go week in, week out.
So why was it so damn hard for me to accept I didn't believe in God?
A part of me hoped and wished I did. It was a very superficial "relationship" and I feel many religious people feel the same way, they just, like me most of my life, are completely unwilling to admit this due to social pressure and fear of going to hell. You can't get saved if you don't play the Religion Lottery.
I couldn't really turn to anyone: my friends or my family. I don't want to break my family (mostly my mother's) heart, and I don't want to be alienated from my black friends more than I already am. I'm the guy who craps on the music my peers listen to on a regular basis because I find it degrading, for example. I guess I will always be a rebel?
I was been coping with this in a variety of ways. A few years ago I started reading up on the various faiths, convinced I was still religious or that I believed in God. I studied for about 2 years, and converted to Islam, thinking it would be the best place for my spiritual journey. I went to mosques and prayed 5 times a day, didn't eat pork and got drunk; the whole routine. And it all felt so...silly to me. I originally presumed that I was agnostic, but instead just assumed and HOPED that it was just the Christian religion. I think it's mostly because I was uncomfortable admitting this fact not only to my family but also to myself. Like realizing Santa Claus isn't who yours parents say he is.
But when I came to realize I didn't actually believe in God this past year, it finally came to be a sigh of relief and now I spend each morning excited for the new day, not because a mysterious space alien "gave" me the ability to wake up, but because life existing in the first place is a one in a billion occurrence, and I"m happy to be a part of it.
What do you all think? Has anyone had similar experiences? It doesn't matter if you're atheist or not.
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