Can we all agree it is wrong for a 32yo to date a teenager?

[Enoch07]

Criminality aside, can we all just agree that it is wrong for a man in his 30s to date a teenager?

Even if she is 18 or 19 which means there is no legal issue. I'd say it's wrong, if nothing else than just a maturity level thing. Of course what 2 consenting adults do, regardless of the age difference, is nobody else business.

But being 40 (soon) year old man myself. Dating anyone under 30-35 would just be a waste of both our time. People should date other people within their own age and maturity range. It just makes life easier and less complicated.

 

[leibowde84]

Moore's age was 32 when he was hitting on 14 to 16 year old girls. Your setup sounded almost just like his situation. Are you totally unaware of current events?

The OP is obviously referring to Roy Moore. But, it is also obviously condemning (not defending) him. Where are you getting the idea that I was defending him?

 

[leibowde84]

Well it shouldn't matter, but at least on a subconscious level it seems to matter to most people. Even you chose to use the word "man" in your question (or did you mean "man" in a more archaic, gender-neutral sense??).

I was referring to the Roy Moore situation specifically. But, I certainly don't think that gender matters.

 

[Subduction Zone]

The OP is obviously referring to Roy Moore. But, it is also obviously condemning (not defending) him. Where are you getting the idea that I was defending him?

My mistake. I agree that there is no excuse for a 32 year old man to go sniffing around underage girls. But it is perfectly okay for a 61 year old to go after an 18 year old

Not really. I think that I would go crazy if I did such a thing. There would be an incredible lack of common ground. Stick to people that are at least reasonably close to your own age..

 

[oldbadger]

No, it's the same exact thing. Why would it matter whether it was a man or a woman?
Not at all. It is the same for men and women.

Good. So we got that cleared up.
Bjut you do understand how prejudiced and sexist your title and OP appear to be?

I didn't ask about the law. I'm asking whether it is morally/ethically responsible.

Morally/Ethically responsible.......
It's Morally and Ethically Irresponsible when people interfer in the private and perfectly legal activities and decisions of other folks with their self righteous and judgemental decisions.
Your OP shows a sweeping prejudice against the rights of people to decide how they want to, and within the law.

Age difference is not at issue here. It is sexual maturity and power.

Dreadful. Utterly dreadful! YOu start out be quoting age differences and then you really go badly wrong.

You nor I have any right to decide who is sexually mature enough or empowered enough to date another beyond the legislation layed down within our countries.

This is leading into a very nasty area, where folks decide that they can stop mentally or physically disabled people from dating who they like.

It's best if we leave this to our Equality legislation and our Criminal lregislation to be applied.

You could be breaking the UK's Age Discrimination legislation, for instance, iof you were to stop a 16-19 teen from dating who s/he wanted to.

 

[oldbadger]

I was referring to the Roy Moore situation specifically. But, I certainly don't think that gender matters.

No you weren't.
You never specified any such name in the OP or Title.

 

[SalixIncendium]

Criminality aside, can we all just agree that it is wrong for a man in his 30s to date a teenager?

Apparently not. Anyway...

In my personal opinion, chronological age is merely a number. Levels of maturity vary with each individual. If a 30 something male that is immature dates someone the same age, chances are interests will vary. But if the same male dates one who is 18 or 19, and the maturity levels are equal, there will likely be more similarities in interests. My opinion would be the same if the gender roles were reversed.

I will also add that I am interpreting "teenager" to be one who is of legal age. I would take issue with a 30 something dating a minor.

That said, if a 30 something chose to date my teenage daughter, there would be a tete-a-tete between me and him regarding his intentions and the implications of any indiscretions.

 

[Augustus]

Criminality aside, can we all just agree that it is wrong for a man in his 30s to date a teenager?

It's fine if they are 18+. If you meet someone you like and get on with, seems a bit arbitrary to say 18-19 is 'wrong' but 20-21 is fine, people mature at completely different rates after all.

What I would be suspicious of is someone in their 30s who went after <18s as a regular pattern of behaviour. If you meet someone who just happens to be 18 it is different from actively seeking out mid-teen partners, as that seems to suggest a worrying character issue.

 

[PureX]

This sounds like going back to Victorian morality. I don't see any reason to change the laws here. If someone falls in love with another, having 18 year old man and 40 year old woman or the other way around, isn't up to me to condemn them.

That's just excuse-making. Grown ups choose who they "fall in love with". And grown ups have no business "falling in love" with teenagers. Likewise, teenagers have no clue what "falling in love" really means or entails. They haven't had time to learn, yet. Which is why they are at a disadvantage when sought after by ignorant, immoral, and sexually predatory adults.

 

[Kangaroo Feathers]

Criminality aside, can we all just agree that it is wrong for a man in his 30s to date a teenager?

18-19 is "teenage", are we saying that would be wrong? *edit* I see this has been asked.

For myself, I guess allowances can be made for singular and exceptional circumstances, but when we're discussing an ongoing pattern of behaviour, yeah, wrong.

 

[leibowde84]

My mistake. I agree that there is no excuse for a 32 year old man to go sniffing around underage girls. But it is perfectly okay for a 61 year old to go after an 18 year old

Not really. I think that I would go crazy if I did such a thing. There would be an incredible lack of common ground. Stick to people that are at least reasonably close to your own age..

Why do you think it's OK for a 61 year old to go after an 18 year old?

 

[leibowde84]

Good. So we got that cleared up.
Bjut you do understand how prejudiced and sexist your title and OP appear to be?

No. Please explain.

Morally/Ethically responsible.......
It's Morally and Ethically Irresponsible when people interfer in the private and perfectly legal activities and decisions of other folks with their self righteous and judgemental decisions.
Your OP shows a sweeping prejudice against the rights of people to decide how they want to, and within the law.

Prejudiced against rights? I think the age of consent should be 21. If you can't drink in the U.S., you might not be ready to have sexual relationships with much older men.

Dreadful. Utterly dreadful! YOu start out be quoting age differences and then you really go badly wrong.

You nor I have any right to decide who is sexually mature enough or empowered enough to date another beyond the legislation layed down within our countries.

This is leading into a very nasty area, where folks decide that they can stop mentally or physically disabled people from dating who they like.

It's best if we leave this to our Equality legislation and our Criminal lregislation to be applied.

You could be breaking the UK's Age Discrimination legislation, for instance, iof you were to stop a 16-19 teen from dating who s/he wanted to.

No, I just think the age of consent should be raised to 21.

 

[Revoltingest]

Why do you think it's OK for a 61 year old to go after an 18 year old?

I never thought you had such a conservative sense of propriety.
Live & learn.

 

[leibowde84]

It's fine if they are 18+. If you meet someone you like and get on with, seems a bit arbitrary to say 18-19 is 'wrong' but 20-21 is fine, people mature at completely different rates after all.

What I would be suspicious of is someone in their 30s who went after <18s as a regular pattern of behaviour. If you meet someone who just happens to be 18 it is different from actively seeking out mid-teen partners, as that seems to suggest a worrying character issue.

I am 33 and I couldn't imagine going out with an 18 year old, as I think it would be wrong. But, that is just my opinion.

 

[Kangaroo Feathers]

No, I just think the age of consent should be raised to 21.

Gosh. Big call.

 

[leibowde84]

No you weren't.
You never specified any such name in the OP or Title.

Nevertheless, I was referring to the Roy Moore situation specifically. It was pretty obvious in the OP even without mentioning his name.

 

[Revoltingest]

Nevertheless, I was referring to the Roy Moore situation specifically. It was pretty obvious in the OP even without mentioning his name.

Obvious to people with Roy Moore on the brain.
Ew.

It never occurred to me.

 

[leibowde84]

I never thought you had such a conservative sense of propriety.
Live & learn.

I just don't like adults taking advantage of teenagers. How hard is it to just wait till they are 21?

 

[Revoltingest]

I just don't like adults taking advantage of teenagers. How hard is it to just wait till they are 21?

Why should they wait?
If an 18 year old has the right, then it ain't none of our business.

 

[Kangaroo Feathers]

I just don't like adults taking advantage of teenagers. How hard is it to just wait till they are 21?

Probably few <21 year olds who'd agree with you.