punkdbass
I will be what I will be
I must admit, even in my most religious or spiritual times, if you were to ask me at the end of the day whether or not I am certain that my spiritual experiences are indeed with "God" (some sort of external, transcendent, personal, conscious Being who cares about you) rather than just with myself and the universe/nature, I don't think I could ever give you an affirmative yes or no to that question. Lately I've been thinking that it's impossible to ever be certain of such a question.. You could argue that it's irrelevant as to what the true source of your spiritual experiences is, rather what's important is that the transformative power of these experiences is indeed real and pulling you in a positive direction.. but does that trouble or disturb you at all?
Perhaps the answer is simply "no," and that this is where "faith" comes into play, and if so, do you find it disturbing at all to put so much time and energy into beliefs you can never be certain of? Does it make you wonder if there exists a philosophy/way of thinking out there that can be just as meaningful and fulfilling to you as your religion, but does not require the sacrifice of intellectual honesty? I guess then the question becomes whether or not it is more honest to believe in something you can't be certain of, or to not believe in something you can't be convinced is fake.
Yes I realize it obviously depends on how you define "God" but I hope you guys understand the point of my question. Can you ever be certain that your spiritual experiences are indeed with God and not just you interacting with yourself and the natural universe? Do you find this at all troubling? Ironically, although my religious/spiritual search for meaning and truth has brought many blessings to my life, it has also been a great source of anxiety for me. I am constantly torn between 2 paths: pursuing religion and dealing with the anxiety due to uncertainty of the true source of my spiritual experiences, or giving up religion and dealing with the anxiety of living in a universe without any inherent meaning or purpose.
Perhaps the answer is simply "no," and that this is where "faith" comes into play, and if so, do you find it disturbing at all to put so much time and energy into beliefs you can never be certain of? Does it make you wonder if there exists a philosophy/way of thinking out there that can be just as meaningful and fulfilling to you as your religion, but does not require the sacrifice of intellectual honesty? I guess then the question becomes whether or not it is more honest to believe in something you can't be certain of, or to not believe in something you can't be convinced is fake.
Yes I realize it obviously depends on how you define "God" but I hope you guys understand the point of my question. Can you ever be certain that your spiritual experiences are indeed with God and not just you interacting with yourself and the natural universe? Do you find this at all troubling? Ironically, although my religious/spiritual search for meaning and truth has brought many blessings to my life, it has also been a great source of anxiety for me. I am constantly torn between 2 paths: pursuing religion and dealing with the anxiety due to uncertainty of the true source of my spiritual experiences, or giving up religion and dealing with the anxiety of living in a universe without any inherent meaning or purpose.
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