Catholic Church Denies First Communion to Girl Who Wanted to Wear a Suit

[Miles]

I like the mom. A+ parenting.

 

[Skwim]

This didn't happen and it's right there in every link.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion.
Not the church.
Tom

The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.
The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.
The parents stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the church.


We good now?

.

 

[columbus]

The church stopped their daughter from taking Holy Communion. Not the parents.

This is not true and anybody who reads the linked articles can see that for themselves.
Tom

 

[David1967]

I wanted to deal with these two points separately. With the above, thanks, as I really do appreciate this.

I too have a daughter, so this hits close to home. Thankfully nothing like this ever happened. Now she is grown and a very adept martial artist, so (in the words of MR.T), I pity the fool who tries.

Please don't blame the entire organization because this actually is quite rare by percent or fraction. The RCC has a lot going for it that's positive, but the real travesty was the Vatican and so many of the bishops just trying to sweep this under the rug to keep the scandal from hurting the image of the church.

I don't blame the RCC as individual Christians. I know that there are wonderful priests, nuns and church members who would never dream of doing nor condoning such a thing. I do however blame those that would "sweep it under the rug", and allow such people to be shuffled to a different church.

This also happens in other denominations as well, but because of the size of the RCC, it's much more noticeable than one's local Protestant church, for example. Does it happen also with the latter?

I agree with you here. It certainly does happen, but (correct me if you think I'm wrong), It appears to be easier to expose this type of thing and prosecute the offending party in many of the protestant churches. At least in my part of the country.

I grew up in a fundamentalist Protestant church, and one of our associate pastors was caught "hitting" with some of the girls in our youth group, and he was also whooshed away to another church. And at another time, the president of our council stole money from the Sunday collection and disappeared with his girlfriend until they got caught.

Neither of these two events made even the local papers let alone the national press, and I would suggest that the church, and maybe even the police, wanted to make sure that it didn't.
Even here at RF, when we catch someone in a lie, how many admit to being guilty? How many even admit that they're wrong on whatever? Some do with the latter but, unfortunately, it's pretty much human nature to defend one's self even through denial of what may be obvious to others.

Again I agree with you here. No group has a monopoly on corruption. Perhaps you are right that it is largely due to the size of the RCC.

It's too bad it is all too often this way, and looking back I definitely would have tried to handle it differently than I did.

Anyhow, thanks again, my friend.

Hindsight really is 20/20. And I am in no way passing judgment on you. The closest I ever came to such a thing was when my daughter was in kindergarten ,the music teacher there had molested a couple of the kids. And he was a church music leader as well. In a Baptist church. Well known in the community. Fortunately my daughter was not one of them. Thank God.
Have a good day Metis.

 

[Skwim]

This is not true and anybody who reads the linked articles can see that for themselves.
Tom

Have a good day.

.

 

[columbus]

Have a good day.

.

Opinion noted.
Tom

 

[Profound Realization]

I agree with "Columbus," and the misleading headline. It's something writers from media are trained to do and are great at, and it evidently works because it stirs up misperceptions and emotional judgements within people.

It is no different then if someone chooses to drive, there are rules the driver has to acknowledge. In this event, there is a dress code. The parents chose to submit their child to these codes, the responsibility lies on them. The people were willing to even bend and give them a private ceremony.

 

[blü 2]

"A 9-year-old girl wasn't able to participate in her first Holy Communion because she wanted to wear a suit."​

As you say, the RCC is free to make up its own rules, so situations like this give them the hard choice between loosening the gender role notions they teach, thus offending many of the regulars, or having a more alert sense of whither the world is trending and letting it happen with a big smile.

They may have a point, though. All churches, even the 'gelicals, are in decline. The RCC's rigid brand, though, is declining more slowly than many of their rivals.

Perhaps the conservative pond is the more important place to fish, thus politically the people you, the priest, need to keep happy.

Fortunately none of this is my problem.

 

[Skwim]

The parents chose to submit their child to these codes, the responsibility lies on them.

Please indicate where they chose to submit their child to these codes. From what was reported, the code pertaining to their daughter was specifically written to deny her participation. "They changed the school’s dress code to specifically ban girls from wearing suits."

The people were willing to even bend and give them a private ceremony.

"Even"? You say this as if they went to great lengths to accommodate her, and that the "private ceremony" was comparable to the Holy Communion the others participated in.

.

 

[Kemosloby]

I would side with the school. If a child want to be rebellious let them do it someplace else.

 

[Treks]

But, isn't there something in the Bible about not wearing clothes meant for the opposite sex?

 

[Profound Realization]

Please indicate where they chose to submit their child to these codes. From what was reported, the code pertaining to their daughter was specifically written to deny her participation. "They changed the school’s dress code to specifically ban girls from wearing suits."


"Even"? You say this as if they went to great lengths to accommodate her, and that the "private ceremony" was comparable to the Holy Communion the others participated in.

.

I don't think that there is a "written" dress code for communion. The mom/parents were given the choice in advance before showing up for it. They chose to not honor that. They also chose to submit themselves and their daughter to tradition, certain teachings, dress codes in school, and rules of a practice in the first place. Why would they have expectations of anything less when it came to communion? It's on them.

No, I said they'd bend to give her a private ceremony if she wanted to go against the dress code given to them. Great lengths and comparable was your added exaggeration. I said that in regards to the misleading headline. The girl wasn't denied communion. The mom denied her communion by not following the rules given.

Anyhow, to me this is trivial and a non-issue. Those that love to get mad, sensitive over trivial things, emotional, blame, allow their nerves to get all twisted and flared up.... they are free to do so.

 

[BilliardsBall]

"A 9-year-old girl wasn't able to participate in her first Holy Communion because she wanted to wear a suit.

​

"They said, 'We're hearing rumors so we want to know what she's wearing,'" the girl's mother, Chris Mansell said, adding that she felt the school's newly issued dress code requiring all girls to wear long sleeve white dresses was created to single her daughter out.

Administrators at the school, which is under the jurisdiction of the local Roman Catholic diocese, gave the family a choice: Either Cady wears a dress to the communion, or she could have a separate, private ceremony without her friends and classmates.

"He said we're raising our daughter wrong for not making her dress in a feminine way," Mansell said. "That's when I decided then and there to fight because they're purposefully excluding my daughter."

"My daughter just wants to wear pants while worshipping the Lord and receiving the Eucharist with her classmates," Mansell wrote in the post. "She's not hurting anyone. However, being excluded and ostracized IS hurting her.”

But the priest and school administrators held firm and when the first communion ceremony began, Cady was not allowed to participate. Administrators from St. John did not return a request for comment.

The family said they are crushed by the school’s decision, and have decided to remove Cady and her sister from the parish and place them in another school."
source​

Of course, a religion can make whatever rules it wants on what ever subject it wishes, but this strikes me as pretty unreasonable as well as hurtful. As brought out in the article, it wasn't that the girl didn't deserve to take her first communion, but that she didn't deserve to appear with the other kids when she did. The only reason I can think of is that the powers in charge were concerned with making an impression on the attending parishioners. The impression on parishioners being more important than the feelings of some kid and her participation in her first mass.

Kind of sad when one thinks about it.

.

I don't understand your point. It's sad that religious groups use clothing standards? They also use morals and ethics and modesty and dining and sexuality standards. Are you just trying to pick a fight (again)?

I disagree with the Roman "church" regarding salvation as coming by works instead of trusting Jesus Christ. But churches are entitled in America, like any other group, to have freedom of association.

 

[Phantasman]

"A 9-year-old girl wasn't able to participate in her first Holy Communion because she wanted to wear a suit.

​

"They said, 'We're hearing rumors so we want to know what she's wearing,'" the girl's mother, Chris Mansell said, adding that she felt the school's newly issued dress code requiring all girls to wear long sleeve white dresses was created to single her daughter out.

Administrators at the school, which is under the jurisdiction of the local Roman Catholic diocese, gave the family a choice: Either Cady wears a dress to the communion, or she could have a separate, private ceremony without her friends and classmates.

"He said we're raising our daughter wrong for not making her dress in a feminine way," Mansell said. "That's when I decided then and there to fight because they're purposefully excluding my daughter."

"My daughter just wants to wear pants while worshipping the Lord and receiving the Eucharist with her classmates," Mansell wrote in the post. "She's not hurting anyone. However, being excluded and ostracized IS hurting her.”

But the priest and school administrators held firm and when the first communion ceremony began, Cady was not allowed to participate. Administrators from St. John did not return a request for comment.

The family said they are crushed by the school’s decision, and have decided to remove Cady and her sister from the parish and place them in another school."
source​

Of course, a religion can make whatever rules it wants on what ever subject it wishes, but this strikes me as pretty unreasonable as well as hurtful. As brought out in the article, it wasn't that the girl didn't deserve to take her first communion, but that she didn't deserve to appear with the other kids when she did. The only reason I can think of is that the powers in charge were concerned with making an impression on the attending parishioners. The impression on parishioners being more important than the feelings of some kid and her participation in her first mass.

Kind of sad when one thinks about it.

.

Jesus church (congregation) is of the spirit, not the flesh. How one dresses flesh has no effect on spirit. The Priests garb is no different. Just because it pleases the eye doesn't mean it doesn't have a defiled heart. As well, if it isn't pleasing to the eye doesn't mean it isn't of the Spirit.

Let the church of the flesh judge the flesh.

John:
15 Ye judge after the flesh; I judge no man.

Just another act by those who "think" they have celestial power on Earth.

 

[DavidFirth]

But, isn't there something in the Bible about not wearing clothes meant for the opposite sex?

Deuteronomy 22:5

 

[metis]

I disagree with the Roman "church" regarding salvation as coming by works instead of trusting Jesus Christ.

It actually teaches that both are necessary as "the works" involve putting Jesus' teachings into action. Historical Christianity never was a rocking-chair religion (just sitting back having nice p.c. beliefs), and the Sermon On the Mount and the Parable of the Sheep & Goats testify to living out "agape", not just paying it lip-service from one's rocking chair.

 

[Skwim]

I don't understand your point. It's sad that religious groups use clothing standards? They also use morals and ethics and modesty and dining and sexuality standards.

According to the articles the rule was created to specifically target the girl, and did not exist until the church was aware she would be wearing a suit.

Are you just trying to pick a fight (again)?

Do you feel that people whom you disagree with are trying to pick a fight with you and those who think like you? Believe me, as much as I appreciate your input, your opinions just aren't that important. I say what I believe and let the chips fall where they may, and would be pleased to see you agree with me.

.

 

[4consideration]

@columbus is right. No one kept the girl from receiving the Sacrament of First Communion.

She refused to follow the dress code for a group ceremony for her class, and was not being allowed to choose her own style of dress -- which would make her stand out from everyone else in the ceremony -- so she chose not to participate. Period.

Anyone that is ready can have their own First Communion. There is no requirement to do it in a group setting.

 

[Treks]

Deuteronomy 22:5

Thanks!

Does a pant suit class as clothing pertaining to a man? If so, I'm confused how people get around this rule? Why would anyone want to talk first communion in clothes that the Lord himself says are an abomination?

 

[DavidFirth]

Thanks!

Does a pant suit class as clothing pertaining to a man? If so, I'm confused how people get around this rule? Why would anyone want to talk first communion in clothes that the Lord himself says are an abomination?

I believe the commandment refers to men deliberately dressing as women and women deliberately dressing as men, in other words cross dressing so to appear to be a person of the opposite sex. This is the reason why I do not believe this commandment applies in this case. This girl is not trying to be a boy, she just prefers to wear a white suit, which I see no problem with.