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Clean Jokes.
- Thread starter DawudTalut
- Start date
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
New dictionary:
Fashion=Drinking soup with the help of fork.
Experience=To do error in the light of previous errors.
Surgeon=Repair-person who repairs parts.
A: What happened in 1643?
B; Newton was born.
A: And what happened in 1650?
B: Newton turned 7.
Fashion=Drinking soup with the help of fork.
Experience=To do error in the light of previous errors.
Surgeon=Repair-person who repairs parts.
A: What happened in 1643?
B; Newton was born.
A: And what happened in 1650?
B: Newton turned 7.
Last edited:
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Peace be on all.
A: I am very upset today?
B: why?
A: I loaned money to a friend for his facial plastic surgery.
B: so?
A: Now I can not recognize him!
==
Night was very dark. The host gave a torch to the guest to use while walking back home. Two hours later, in late part of night, bell of host rang, guest was at door. He said:
"I reached my home safely in the light of your torch. Thanks. Now I have come to return it to you, maybe you need it!"
==
A: What to do with fruits to save them from getting rotting.
B: Eat all of them as soon as possible.
==
Once a man passed by a donkey. Donkey kicked him. Man became angry and kicked it twice and said, "what do you think, am I less than you?"
==
A: After so many years, I am still powerful as I used to be in my youth.
B: How?
A: See that stone. In my youth years, I could not lift it. .......and I cannot lift it today either.
==
A: Have you studied maths well for exam.
B: Yes.
A: If you have 3 apples and 2 bananas, how many are these?
B: Do not know.
A: Why?
B: My teacher taught me same problem with tomatoes and oranges.
==
A: I am very upset today?
B: why?
A: I loaned money to a friend for his facial plastic surgery.
B: so?
A: Now I can not recognize him!
==
Night was very dark. The host gave a torch to the guest to use while walking back home. Two hours later, in late part of night, bell of host rang, guest was at door. He said:
"I reached my home safely in the light of your torch. Thanks. Now I have come to return it to you, maybe you need it!"
==
A: What to do with fruits to save them from getting rotting.
B: Eat all of them as soon as possible.
==
Once a man passed by a donkey. Donkey kicked him. Man became angry and kicked it twice and said, "what do you think, am I less than you?"
==
A: After so many years, I am still powerful as I used to be in my youth.
B: How?
A: See that stone. In my youth years, I could not lift it. .......and I cannot lift it today either.
==
A: Have you studied maths well for exam.
B: Yes.
A: If you have 3 apples and 2 bananas, how many are these?
B: Do not know.
A: Why?
B: My teacher taught me same problem with tomatoes and oranges.
==
Two antennas met on a roof. They fell in love and got married.
The wedding wasn't that great, but the reception was excellent.
The wedding wasn't that great, but the reception was excellent.
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Meaning:
UNO:
= If one little and one big country go to UNO for solving a dispute, chances are the little one will disappear.
=If two little countries take their dispute to UNO, chance are dispute will disappear..
=If two big countries go there for a dispute, chances are UNO will disappear.
Historian:
Someone who is not interested in alive ones but is interested in deads.
Investigator:
A person who sees under the table but not on over the table.
Atomic war:
An unfortunate incident in which only atom bomb wins.
===
http://freaksense.com/new-technology/
UNO:
= If one little and one big country go to UNO for solving a dispute, chances are the little one will disappear.
=If two little countries take their dispute to UNO, chance are dispute will disappear..
=If two big countries go there for a dispute, chances are UNO will disappear.
Historian:
Someone who is not interested in alive ones but is interested in deads.
Investigator:
A person who sees under the table but not on over the table.
Atomic war:
An unfortunate incident in which only atom bomb wins.
===
http://freaksense.com/new-technology/
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
A: Why could you not post the letter?
B: I checked many streets but each letter box was locked.
=Computer has taught me how to paint.
I thought you was going to be an engineer, not a painter.
=Today a monitor burnt in our institution.
Sorry, hope injuries were not severe to poor fellow.
=I shall make a great photo of you in photoshop.
No, it is too cold to go out to a shop.
=It seem a virus has come in his computer.
Take this spray, spray and kill the virus.
B: I checked many streets but each letter box was locked.
=Computer has taught me how to paint.
I thought you was going to be an engineer, not a painter.
=Today a monitor burnt in our institution.
Sorry, hope injuries were not severe to poor fellow.
=I shall make a great photo of you in photoshop.
No, it is too cold to go out to a shop.
=It seem a virus has come in his computer.
Take this spray, spray and kill the virus.
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Drive a nail safely.
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
A: You was about to go to visit doctor today!
B: I shall go tomorrow today I am not feeling well.
Teacher: If you keep doing so many mistakes in homework, how you will make any progress?
Child: My parents might know, they did all this work.
A: I lifted the lion and throw it away. Kicked an elephant, Punched hippopotamus.
B: Amazing! then?
A: Then what?....Owner of toy-shop asked me to leave.
B: I shall go tomorrow today I am not feeling well.
Teacher: If you keep doing so many mistakes in homework, how you will make any progress?
Child: My parents might know, they did all this work.
A: I lifted the lion and throw it away. Kicked an elephant, Punched hippopotamus.
B: Amazing! then?
A: Then what?....Owner of toy-shop asked me to leave.
Last edited:
Ana.J
Active Member
I think I made that last one. I don't remember where the others came from.Where do you get those?
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Peace be on all.
Teacher: Give an example of something which dialates in summer and shrinks in winter.
Child: Vacations
====
Guest to little boy: What is your duty in today's feast?
Little boy: Service after the feast is over.
G: What kind of service?
B: To count spoons.
====
A: Please tell the definition of class fellow?
B:The one who fails in class is called class fellow.
Teacher: Give an example of something which dialates in summer and shrinks in winter.
Child: Vacations
====
Guest to little boy: What is your duty in today's feast?
Little boy: Service after the feast is over.
G: What kind of service?
B: To count spoons.
====
A: Please tell the definition of class fellow?
B:The one who fails in class is called class fellow.
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Peace be on all.
Doctor to child patient: Did the tablets give you relief, which I gave you yesterday for headache?
Child: Yes, a lot, I played with them whole day, and never thought about head ache.
===
A: How is your hen now, which was hit by a bicycle the other day?
B: It is good now, but the egg it lays are broken.
===
Judge: How did you pick the purse from victim's pocket?
Accused: Sir, the fee to teach this knowledge is 500 dollars, check or cash anything.
===
A: He insulted me today.
B: How?
A: He asked me whether I know to sing.
B: I do not see any insult in this question.
A: He asked me after he heard me singing!
Doctor to child patient: Did the tablets give you relief, which I gave you yesterday for headache?
Child: Yes, a lot, I played with them whole day, and never thought about head ache.
===
A: How is your hen now, which was hit by a bicycle the other day?
B: It is good now, but the egg it lays are broken.
===
Judge: How did you pick the purse from victim's pocket?
Accused: Sir, the fee to teach this knowledge is 500 dollars, check or cash anything.
===
A: He insulted me today.
B: How?
A: He asked me whether I know to sing.
B: I do not see any insult in this question.
A: He asked me after he heard me singing!
DawudTalut
Peace be upon you.
Peace be on you.
Teacher: Use 'ice' in sentence.
Child: Water is cold.
T: Where is ice in the sentence?
C:It is melted.
===
A: Which vitamin is found in red chili?
B: High potency vitamin C.
A: How do you know?
B: Because after eating red chili we utter, C, C, C.
===
A: How was your operation?
B: Doctors said you will not have any trouble, they pierced a needle in my hand and I disappeared.
===
Non-Joke Area:
Teacher: Use 'ice' in sentence.
Child: Water is cold.
T: Where is ice in the sentence?
C:It is melted.
===
A: Which vitamin is found in red chili?
B: High potency vitamin C.
A: How do you know?
B: Because after eating red chili we utter, C, C, C.
===
A: How was your operation?
B: Doctors said you will not have any trouble, they pierced a needle in my hand and I disappeared.
===
Non-Joke Area: