Compulsion or not? What say you, Muslims?

[YmirGF]

Given that in the Islamic teaching that there can be no compulsion in religion what is the position on Muslim’s raising children? Are children automatically considered Muslims or do they actually have to choose at a certain point to follow Islam or not? If it is the latter what happens if the child decides not to follow Islam? Is this perhaps also tied into the idea that one should always honor ones father and mother and never bring disgrace upon them or the family? If that is the case, then how can the entreatment to become a practicing Muslim not be considered as compulsion? Personally, I don’t see how a child would have much choice in the matter lest they draw the ire of their parents and family. Is it different in families who are already Muslims?

I am certain I know the answer already, but I would like to hear the perspectives of those "born in to faith" as well as the opinions of "reverts". The "revert" opinion might be especially enlightening.

Any thoughts? :bow:

 

[Djamila]

I've never had to deal with this problem because my niece is far more overtly religious than I am, so I have no fears for her faith.

In practice, I think the Islamic solution for a Muslim family would be this:

Share your faith with your children, just as people of all faiths do. Raise them with Islamic values and morals and teach them how to be a proper Muslim and what benefits, both in this world and after it, they can experience. Take them to mosque, take them to susreti and other Islamic get-togethers.

If, when they're older, they rebel against it then let them. I believe saying there is no compulsion in religion means we're not allowed to tie them down at mosque, or put a gun to their head throughout the first morning prayer - it doesn't mean we're not allowed to raise them in our faith. We just have to respond to any negative reactions to Islam on their part as a Muslim should respond. We have to be patient, we have to be kind, we have to help them as best we can without hurting them or abusing them - and all of this is required by other passages even without the command there be no compulsion in religion.

Also, I think in practice, this verse refers moreso to the importance of having faith and belief in your heart and not just doing what you feel you have to do to fit into society. It's not enough to go to mosque five times a day to please your parents, if your heart is empty of love for God.

 

[sister M]

Given that in the Islamic teaching that there can be no compulsion in religion what is the position on Muslim’s raising children? Are children automatically considered Muslims or do they actually have to choose at a certain point to follow Islam or not? If it is the latter what happens if the child decides not to follow Islam? Is this perhaps also tied into the idea that one should always honor ones father and mother and never bring disgrace upon them or the family? If that is the case, then how can the entreatment to become a practicing Muslim not be considered as compulsion? Personally, I don’t see how a child would have much choice in the matter lest they draw the ire of their parents and family. Is it different in families who are already Muslims?

I am certain I know the answer already, but I would like to hear the perspectives of those "born in to faith" as well as the opinions of "reverts". The "revert" opinion might be especially enlightening.

Any thoughts? :bow:

Well I am a revert and do raise my children according to Islamic values and also practising our faith. It is my duty as their parent to do that. It would be negligence not to acknowledge what I believe in and withhold it from them.

I take this up, since I have met several non Muslims that think it is wrong to raise children as Muslim, then I mean especially as Muslims. And that makes it even more valuable as I see it to not withdraw from that duty.

Of course I do hope my children will continue to follow Islam as I see it as the best way for them and the Islamic values and moral issues is great to be accompanied by.

If they however would take the decision to later on leave Islam it would not be a disgrace to our family. I would feel very sorry for them and would probably try to talk to them to reconsider. But I would not physically do any harm to them for their choice. They would still be my children.

 

[Sahar]

Given that in the Islamic teaching that there can be no compulsion in religion what is the position on Muslim’s raising children? Are children automatically considered Muslims or do they actually have to choose at a certain point to follow Islam or not? If it is the latter what happens if the child decides not to follow Islam? Is this perhaps also tied into the idea that one should always honor ones father and mother and never bring disgrace upon them or the family? If that is the case, then how can the entreatment to become a practicing Muslim not be considered as compulsion? Personally, I don’t see how a child would have much choice in the matter lest they draw the ire of their parents and family. Is it different in families who are already Muslims?

I am certain I know the answer already, but I would like to hear the perspectives of those "born in to faith" as well as the opinions of "reverts". The "revert" opinion might be especially enlightening.

Any thoughts? :bow:

I think "no compulsion in religion" is different from raising children as muslims. The baby is muslim from the first moment the air fills his lungs (or maybe even before he was born), but his family are the ones who christianize him or whatever religion they choose for him i.e. to be a muslim is nothing except following your straight instinct and nature, following any other religion is going against this nature! Your not going to tell ur child; "ur free now to walk on ur legs or on ur hands!!"!!!! lol (regardless of the example, i hope i made myself clear!!!).
And this is how the mu'min think: " O my Lord! make me one who establishes regular Prayer, and also (raise such) among my offspring O our Lord! and accept Thou my Prayer." Holy Quran
And you will be asked for your children in front of your Creator! but if they grew up, and went against their straight instinct, i will try my best to advise them, otherwise, i can't help and i hope it wasn't a shoratge of me!

 

[yuvgotmel]

I think "no compulsion in religion" is different from raising children as muslims. The baby is muslim from the first moment the air fills his lungs (or maybe even before he was born), but his family are the ones who christianize him or whatever religion they choose for him i.e. to be a muslim is nothing except following your straight instinct and nature, following any other religion is going against this nature!

What "inner nature" are you referring to?

Hypothetically speaking then, are you saying that if a child grew up without being taught any religion or culture, then they would automatically be driven to Islam?

 

[jamaesi]

When I have children of course I'll teach them about Islam- but I'll teach them about every other religion and lack of and make it very clear it's their choice.

 

[maro]

as a muslim , i believe raising a child is a very huge responsibility ,especially in this age ,

"O you who believe, save yourself and your family from a fire, the fuel of which is men and stones". (Surah at-Tahrim)


i have to be a good muslim ,myself , so that it will be easy for my children to be good muslims as well ,
i have to choose a pious decent partner , because i am not only choosing a partner for my self, but a father for my children

i have to provide a good clean enviroment for my children

i have to teach them to use their minds , decide for themselves , ask questions about what they ignore ,or what they can't fully understand , and motivate them to gain knowledge

i wish my children will be able to recite the quran at early age ,


prophet Muhammed (PBUH) said :

"Every one of you is a guardian, and responsible for what is in his custody. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects and responsible for them; a husband is a guardian of his family and is responsible for it; a lady is a guardian of her husband’s house and is responsible for it, and a servant is a guardian of his master’s property and is responsible for it. A man is a guardian of his father’s property and is responsible for it so all of you are guardians and responsible for your wards and things under your care)." (Bukhâri 3/592)



"Your riches and your children may be but a trial:

whereas Allah, with Him is the highest Reward."
[Qur'an 64:15]


i wish i can provide good education for my children , about their religion , their country affairs, and many other aspects , because this will be their weapon , in such a chaotic world

Allah’ Messenger (saws) said, "A father gives his child nothing better than a good education." (Tirmidhi 4977 and Baihaqi)​

Allah’s Messenger (saws) said: "A single scholar of religion is more formidable against Satan than a thousand devout people." (Tirmidhi 217 and Ibn Majah​

i also would like to teach them about their great ancsestors , and their great glory , which enlighened the whole world by faith , science , and struggle​

after i do all my best, i''l always pray for my children to be guided to the straight path , the path of their happiness in this life and the afterlife ,
​

but if they chose another way , i will accept God's will and wisdom,
sure i'll be extemely grieved, but all i am going to say :​

'Allah has preordained , and what he wishes , he does" , and i 'll never stop praying for them ,
and i'll never give up the mercy of Allah ​

 

[bangsamoro]

Children are the apple of man's eye, the source of great joy and companionship. They make life sweet and, after Allah, they are the ones on whom he pins his hopes. Their blessing brings rizq mercy and an abundance of reward.

But this depends on the children having a good, solid upbringing, which will make them respectful, kind and a source of happiness. If a man's children have these good attributes then they will truly be joys of this life, as Allah described them in the Quran.


18:46. Wealth and sons are allurements of the life of this world: But the things that endure, good deeds, are best in the sight of thy Lord, as rewards, and best as (the foundation for) hopes.

The True Muslim understand his great responsibility towards the children he has brought into this world, as the Quran tell us:

66:6. O ye who believe! save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who flinch not (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allah, but do (precisely) what they are commanded.

Children would not have turned against their parents if their parents had kept to the right path, recognized their responsibilities towards their children and done their duty as they should.

64:14. O ye who believe! Truly, among your wives and your children are (some that are) enemies to yourselves: so beware of them! But if ye forgive and overlook, and cover up (their faults), verily Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

 

[Peace]

I was born a Muslim and I was raised as a Muslim alhamdulillah (Thanks be to God) and I choose to live my life as a Muslim and to die a Muslim. Of course I will raise my children as Muslims, for I know and sure of that Islam is the path that will lead them to happiness and success both in this life and the life to come.

Peace

 

[fullyveiled muslimah]

It is neglect not to raise our children muslim. Does not a christian raise their children christian? Does not an atheist teach that by default to their children? The verse starting with La ikraha fid-deen....there is no compulsion in religion refers to making non-muslims be muslim. For muslims there is a great deal of compulsion. We are compelled to make salat, pay zakat, fast in ramadhan,etc. We are not to attempt forceful conversion of people who do not wish to be converted. The entire verse is like this:

256. There is no compulsion in religion. Verily, the Right Path has become distinct from the wrong path. Whoever disbelieves in Tâghûtand believes in Allâh, then he has grasped the most trustworthy handhold that will never break. And Allâh is All-Hearer, All-Knower.

Here Allah says there is no compulsion in religion. Then He gives the reason why in the next line when He says Verily the right path has become distinct from the wrong path. Because guidance is distinct from misguidance, Allah inform us that we are not to force people to conversions.

257. Allâh is the Walî (Protector or Guardian) of those who believe. He brings them out from darkness into light. But as for those who disbelieve, their Auliyâ (supporters and helpers) are Tâghût [false deities and false leaders, etc.], they bring them out from light into darkness. Those are the dwellers of the Fire, and they will abide therein forever.

In this next verse follwing that one before, Allah goes on to describe how He guides and how people act when misguided. It says nothing about children and families. About families Allah says:

O you who believe, save yourself and your family from a fire, the fuel of which is men and stones". (Surah at-Tahrim)

We are ordered to not only be concerned with our own escape from punishment but also with the escape of our children and all those whom we had influence and position over. Parents will be called to account for the actions of their children. If the parents did nothing to instruct their children and cultivate and safaguard their iman, then all the haram acts that child ever does will be attributed back to the parents. For it was their responsibility to impart these things to their children. If the parents did so to the best of their ability and the child still goes astray then the parents are not held even partially responsible.

If I had children then I would definitely raise them muslim. If they turn away then I will attempt to have them reconsider that choice. If they persist then I will have to turn away from them just as they have turned from Allah. It has nothing to do with family pride. There is more at stake then my feelings. I will remember that:


56. Verily! You (O Muhammad SAW) guide not whom you like, but Allâh guides whom He wills. And He knows best those who are the guided.

My love for my children does not guide them. As Allah states to the prophet in the above verse, I do not guide those whom I like or love, but it is Allah who guides whom He wills to guide.

 

[NoahideHiker]

OK, so say I make it to the end of this age and I am offered to convert to Islam and I say, "Ya know, I really happy with my faith and I don't want to convert to Islam." and I refuse Islam. What happens to me? Is Islam the only proper religion according to Islam?

 

[maro]

Is Islam the only proper religion according to Islam?

i hope this will answer your qusetion

part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RL8MbPFsQZw

part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fgbh4XxZW0&mode=related&search=

 

[yuvgotmel]

i hope this will answer your qusetion

part 1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RL8MbPFsQZw

part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Fgbh4XxZW0&mode=related&search=

I watched part of Part 1. Now I have a stomach ache and a headache. I don't mind if others believe in this or that.

But it crosses the line when others assume to know me and what I believe. That is exactly what the speaker on that video Part 1 did. He assumed I was born a Muslim????? Then he went on to state that all non-Muslims are basically Muslims-in-denial. That is very presumptuous and totally untrue!!!!!

I’m not a Muslim; and I find that kind of speech intolerable and hateful to my character and nature. If he wants to be a Muslim fine, but don’t include me! He lied. The person on that video lied and then slandered me and other non-Muslims. First of all, I’m not a Muslim. And secondly, to say that my nature is somehow deficient and that I’m somehow in denial is totally slanderous!!!!

Furthermore, he went to great extents to show how there is either one true religion or all is false, then finally came to the conclusion that there is one true religion, but in doing so, he contradicted himself by the method he used to come to that conclusion!

I couldn’t get any further into his speech than that. Now I need some Tums and Excedrin Migraine.

 

[maro]

I watched part of Part 1. Now I have a stomach ache and a headache. I don't mind if others believe in this or that. ...................

I couldn’t get any further into his speech than that. Now I need some Tums and Excedrin Migraine.

:biglaugh: :biglaugh: , that was funny

the man was not talking about you , the man was talking about what muslims believe to be the instinctive nature of human beings "by which they were born " , and before being changed and influenced by the external factors

we believe that man is religious by nature , his instinct ,if remained pure , will lead him to know god and submit his will to him ,
which means it will lead him to islam

 

[Sahar]

He assumed I was born a Muslim?????

He he he he.....well, this how muslims believe, every one was born on the firtah; the nature and innate disposition to worship Allah alone and to goodness. Every aspect in Islam is not only very compatible and matching with this firtah but also promotes and develops it!
"Set your face to the dîn in sincerity (hanîfan) which is Allâh’s fitrah (the nature made by Allâh) upon which He created mankind (fatâra’n-nâs). There is no changing the creation of Allâh. That is the right dîn but most people know not." Holy Quran

Hypothetically speaking then, are you saying that if a child grew up without being taught any religion or culture, then they would automatically be driven to Islam?

I can't guarnatee this for one reason; there will always be Shaytan and Nafs (self) that try to deviate the person from the right path! what culture or religion was the son of Adam taught when he killed his brother?! what culture or religion was the first one who worshiped idols beside Allah taught?! That's why the human is always in a struggle against those 2 enemies! Otherwise, my answer would be YES!

 

[lilithu]

What "inner nature" are you referring to?

Hypothetically speaking then, are you saying that if a child grew up without being taught any religion or culture, then they would automatically be driven to Islam?

Not automatically driven to Islam. Born Muslim. "Muslim" means "one who submits" (to the will of God). In Islam it is believed that all animals are muslim, that is, they all naturally do what God wills them to do. Only humans have the ability to choose otherwise. So your natural state would be to be in tune with God's will and then thru societal teachings or choice or whatever, you may stray from God's will.

Islam exists because it was necessary to remind people of God's will because we have strayed; we have forgotten. If we had never strayed/forgotten then Islam (and any other religion) would not be necessary, as we would naturally follow God's will.

 

[des]

I didn't see the videos in question-- I find utube way too addictive to start, but you should remember that like anything else on utube they aren't the truth wiht a capital "T". They are a certain person's version thereof.

If, for instance, he assumed you were a Muslim, then he was obviously seeking some audience subset (and perhaps some votes and, well the utube version of froobles ).

I can sure identify with your stomach ache headache in trying to view some of other faith's pronouncements. I sure see this with my ex-faith, Christianity, as I try to tease out all the various beliefs and sub-beliefs.
Take it easy and take your tums.

--des

I watched part of Part 1. Now I have a stomach ache and a headache. I don't mind if others believe in this or that.

But it crosses the line when others assume to know me and what I believe. That is exactly what the speaker on that video Part 1 did. He assumed I was born a Muslim????? Then he went on to state that all non-Muslims are basically Muslims-in-denial. That is very presumptuous and totally untrue!!!!!
I couldn’t get any further into his speech than that. Now I need some Tums and Excedrin Migraine.

 

[Mujahid Mohammed]

Not automatically driven to Islam. Born Muslim. "Muslim" means "one who submits" (to the will of God). In Islam it is believed that all animals are muslim, that is, they all naturally do what God wills them to do.

Well said

Only humans have the ability to choose otherwise.

Jinn also.

So your natural state would be to be in tune with God's will and then thru societal teachings or choice or whatever, you may stray from God's will.

Islam exists because it was necessary to remind people of God's will because we have strayed; we have forgotten. If we had never strayed/forgotten then Islam (and any other religion) would not be necessary, as we would naturally follow God's will.

I can agree with most of that.

 

[zenzero]

Friends,
Man came first and then religion which is just a WAY to reach to that source /god/allah etc.
The choice of religion depends on suitability of the individual to reach the source and non can stop the individual to make that choice but whether the individual excercises that option or not depends on him.
Love & rgds

 

[AbuQuteiba]

Friends,
Man came first and then religion which is just a WAY to reach to that source /god/allah etc.
The choice of religion depends on suitability of the individual to reach the source and non can stop the individual to make that choice but whether the individual excercises that option or not depends on him.
Love & rgds

Of course, this opinion is your choice (like you said). Islam teaches us that the only suitable religion for humanity is Islam. It is the religion Allah(SWT) chose for humanity. But that's what we believe.