Divorce?

[DallasApple]

Remain faithful to your spouse. Stay single.

Thats really sad and pathetic.

Marriage was created in the first place because its not good to be alone.That you would have to "remain faithful" and "alone" if you are the marrying type because someone you married screwed you over and abandoned you is a rediculous attitude.

I once saw a 22 year old girl being lectured this.Hadnt seen her "husband " in two years.I suppose she had her "hoorah" times from 18 when she married to 20 years old and should "remain faithful" for 60 years to the blank space .

That is sad and pathetic.

Love

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Quote:
And besides that what is a "bad marriage"?
Let's let those contemplating divorce decide.

Obviously one or both will decide that.

But if one decides that and the other cant do anything to make the other not decide that then the one that didnt decide that should not be called an "adulterer" if they go on and remarry instead of "beign faithful" to a jerk off that they will never see again.

Love

Dallas

 

[Dunemeister]

Thats really sad and pathetic.

Only if you make it so.

Marriage was created in the first place because its not good to be alone.That you would have to "remain faithful" and "alone" if you are the marrying type because someone you married screwed you over and abandoned you is a rediculous attitude.

Well, the question isn't so simple as a citation from Genesis 2, I'm afraid. And I'm sorry if you think Jesus' attitude is ridiculous.

I once saw a 22 year old girl being lectured this.Hadnt seen her "husband " in two years.I suppose she had her "hoorah" times from 18 when she married to 20 years old and should "remain faithful" for 60 years to the blank space.

Yes.

That is sad and pathetic.

Then God is sad and pathetic. Israel, for all her history, committed adultery against her husband (God) by chasing after other gods (fornication or adultery). Yet God has never abandoned her or chosen another people to be his people. Marriage is, for us humans, an opportunity for us to enter into this kind of love. Having this kind of love sometimes involves pain. God is hurt by his bride's infidelities. But instead of abandoning her, he went so far as to become incarnate and die in order to win her back.

Yes, it's pathetic. And I love Him for it.

 

[DallasApple]

Only if you make it so.



Well, the question isn't so simple as a citation from Genesis 2, I'm afraid. And I'm sorry if you think Jesus' attitude is ridiculous.



Yes.



Then God is sad and pathetic. Israel, for all her history, committed adultery against her husband (God) by chasing after other gods (fornication or adultery). Yet God has never abandoned her or chosen another people to be his people. Marriage is, for us humans, an opportunity for us to enter into this kind of love. Having this kind of love sometimes involves pain. God is hurt by his bride's infidelities. But instead of abandoning her, he went so far as to become incarnate and die in order to win her back.

Yes, it's pathetic. And I love Him for it.

A man married to a woman ISNT GOD neither is a WOMAN married to a man.

If you want to get "married to God" then you become a nun or a priest.

Paul even understood MOST of us do not want to just be married to God.MOST of us as I think GOD understood as well KNOW that we yearn and need another human being that is why he paired us .

And the "one chance or nothing" thing is SAD and pathetic unlike God...

Love

Dallas

 

[jnm66]

Only if you make it so.



Well, the question isn't so simple as a citation from Genesis 2, I'm afraid. And I'm sorry if you think Jesus' attitude is ridiculous.



Yes.



Then God is sad and pathetic. Israel, for all her history, committed adultery against her husband (God) by chasing after other gods (fornication or adultery). Yet God has never abandoned her or chosen another people to be his people. Marriage is, for us humans, an opportunity for us to enter into this kind of love. Having this kind of love sometimes involves pain. God is hurt by his bride's infidelities. But instead of abandoning her, he went so far as to become incarnate and die in order to win her back.

Yes, it's pathetic. And I love Him for it.

Hello Dunemeister;
I too love God-and Jesus....but i think you are off base on this one,I was married and divorced,for infidelity reasons(hers-not mine)she became pregnant..we already had a child...what a mess that was.
I divorced her-thru all that and after i still felt guilt(woulda-shoulda-coulda stuff)
With that being said should a person stay together when violence is involved?
What about mental abuse?What about other types of abuse?Why should a person stay if their mental faculties or physical faculties are in danger?
AS for the scriptural part....
Look at it this way,there are only 2 reasons for divorce
(1)infidelity
(2)unbeliever of spouse(abandonment) Since the person could be abuse active...are they believers...i think not!
if you look in Colossians-Peter and Ephesians you woll see verse alluding to the proper treatment of spousal relationship(do not be harsh)etc,
I do not think divorce should be a haphazard way to get out of a marriage-we have to much divorce and i think especially the children can suffer mostly. But no one should be treated harshly...man or woman>

 

[DallasApple]

Hello Dunemeister;
I too love God-and Jesus....but i think you are off base on this one,I was married and divorced,for infidelity reasons(hers-not mine)she became pregnant..we already had a child...what a mess that was.
I divorced her-thru all that and after i still felt guilt(woulda-shoulda-coulda stuff)
With that being said should a person stay together when violence is involved?
What about mental abuse?What about other types of abuse?Why should a person stay if their mental faculties or physical faculties are in danger?
AS for the scriptural part....
Look at it this way,there are only 2 reasons for divorce
(1)infidelity
(2)unbeliever of spouse(abandonment) Since the person could be abuse active...are they believers...i think not!
if you look in Colossians-Peter and Ephesians you woll see verse alluding to the proper treatment of spousal relationship(do not be harsh)etc,
I do not think divorce should be a haphazard way to get out of a marriage-we have to much divorce and i think especially the children can suffer mostly. But no one should be treated harshly...man or woman>

I dont think he is saying to remain in the relationship necessarily.Just if you divorce your spouse or if they divorce you no matter what the cause you should remain single and "faithful" to that spouse for the rest of your life.

IOW in your case you and your ex-wife should remain single.

I know so many people that had a spouse divorce them without Biblical cause or that needed a divorce to escape some sort of neglect or abuse that later remarried and have a wonderful marriage that could only be pleasing to God.

And speaking of children? Children are statistically better off in two parent homes than in single parent homes.

I have an aunt that is a perfect example.She married very young and she and her husband had a daughter.Her husband was abusive and ultimately abandoned her when their daughter was still just a toddler.She remarrried and her second husband legally adopted the child and they have been married for over 30 years.How would it have been good for the little girl to have been denied the chance to have a father in her life?(an active/ present loving supportive father that is).

Love

Dallas

 

[Dunemeister]

Hello Dunemeister;
I too love God-and Jesus....but i think you are off base on this one,I was married and divorced,for infidelity reasons(hers-not mine)she became pregnant..we already had a child...what a mess that was.
I divorced her-thru all that and after i still felt guilt(woulda-shoulda-coulda stuff)
With that being said should a person stay together when violence is involved?
What about mental abuse?What about other types of abuse?Why should a person stay if their mental faculties or physical faculties are in danger?
AS for the scriptural part....
Look at it this way,there are only 2 reasons for divorce
(1)infidelity
(2)unbeliever of spouse(abandonment) Since the person could be abuse active...are they believers...i think not!
if you look in Colossians-Peter and Ephesians you woll see verse alluding to the proper treatment of spousal relationship(do not be harsh)etc,
I do not think divorce should be a haphazard way to get out of a marriage-we have to much divorce and i think especially the children can suffer mostly. But no one should be treated harshly...man or woman>

I'm very sorry that your marriage ended, especially under such horrible circumstances of betrayal. I agree no one should be treated harshly. Nor do I think a woman (or man) should live with his or her abuser. But I'm also captive to Jesus' authority on this. Should my wife cheat on me, I do not have the option to divorce; I DO have the option of seperation and remaining single. I knew that going in to my marriage. Perhaps it's my acceptance of Jesus' word on this that makes me a bit less anxious about that potential outcome. God was with me in my singleness, and I was complete and whole. He was been with me in my marriage. Should that end, he will still be with me in my future singleness. Through all this, I am whole (although in the trials there is no denying the pain).

I don't think Paul can be interpreted as permitting divorce. Rather, he says not to resist an unbeliever's departure from a marriage. So if your unbelieving spouse leaves you, you are not to resist that. Let the spouse go. But the person is still your spouse. It has been a while since I read those particular passages, so it'd be worth a re-read. But I'm fairly confident that re-marriage in this case isn't an option.

What brings hope to all this -- for the Christian at least -- is that God is merciful. He knows we are but dust and on that basis he is willing to forgive our misdeeds and restore us.

 

[Dunemeister]

A man married to a woman ISNT GOD neither is a WOMAN married to a man.

Agreed.

If you want to get "married to God" then you become a nun or a priest.

No, you repent and are baptized in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost.

Paul even understood MOST of us do not want to just be married to God. MOST of us as I think GOD understood as well KNOW that we yearn and need another human being that is why he paired us.

Using your definition of "married to God", agreed.

And the "one chance or nothing" thing is SAD and pathetic unlike God...

Except that's what Jesus said... "Let no one seperate."

 

[Archer]

this is an interesting read: Jesus On Divorce and Remarriage

There are no grounds for divorce, but most marriages that end had no foundation in the first place. I have been with my wife since 1989, we married in 1994. Five years to learn each other, we did not live together before marriage.

Too many people are in lust, not love therefore if they entered into marriage under false pretenses were they even married?

I will never remarry if anything should happen! One time is enough and if she dies or it goes south so be it.

 

[Dunemeister]

Too many people are in lust, not love therefore if they entered into marriage under false pretenses were they even married?

Marrying just because you're "in love" is just as bad as being "in lust." The "in love" bit can (and does) change. This emotional state is no foundation for a lasting commitment. Rather, the lasting commitment is the foundation for the emotional state. Marriages tend to be successful where they are made by parties who know the other, like what the other is all about, and there is a strong congruence between them about what kind of life they want (better, the life God is calling them to).

 

[DallasApple]

I have been married for 21 years..(together starting from first time fornicating 28 years ago when I was 14 ) Trust me its NOT LUST...(only on occasion)

Love

Dallas

 

[Archer]

Marrying just because you're "in love" is just as bad as being "in lust." The "in love" bit can (and does) change. This emotional state is no foundation for a lasting commitment. Rather, the lasting commitment is the foundation for the emotional state. Marriages tend to be successful where they are made by parties who know the other, like what the other is all about, and there is a strong congruence between them about what kind of life they want (better, the life God is calling them to).

5 year relationship before marriage. And love is the only reason to get married!

A love that surpasses the love one has for ones life. A completeness if you will. My wife and I complete each other. A lot of people that are in love are clueless! I see it every day.

 

[Dunemeister]

5 year relationship before marriage. And love is the only reason to get married!

If "love" is that agape form, I fully agree. But that's not being "in love." That latter heady state may get the ball rolling but it won't keep it rolling. That's all I'm sayin'.

 

[Archer]

If "love" is that agape form, I fully agree. But that's not being "in love." That latter heady state may get the ball rolling but it won't keep it rolling. That's all I'm sayin'.

Oh! No! well I agree to a point, most don't really know what it is to love. You have to ask? If there was no true bond was there even love? As Paul said let the non believer go? If they believed in the sanctity of marriage and were believers they would not move away from their partner, they would grow with that partner.

 

[lockyfan]

Jesus actually told us there that there is only one reason to Divorce scripturally. Adultery. You can still divorce your mate on any account that is abusive as well as adultry (abusive in any form) but with a view of getting them help and the couple getting back together.