Females and solo travel

[Audie]

Yeah, no, that's the beautiful thing. The more who go, the more they can be visible and demand change.
That's how all the big changes worked in the history of feminism



I am never armed, safe with my general aura of arrogance

I...dont think arrogance would
have served you well if youd been
where I was, nor that demanding that
sadists change their ways will be efficacious.

 

[ChristineM]

I...dont think arrogance would
have served you well if youd been
where I was, nor that demanding that
sadists change their ways will be efficacious.

Been there, i learned to defend myself, after the fact, no use then but it won't happen again

 

[Heyo]

I am never armed, safe with my general aura of arrogance

The best defence against becoming a victim, is not to look like a victim.

(Though it's not a guarantee, I doubt @Audie looks like a victim.)

 

[Heyo]

But staying home is not the solution. If you, individually, choose to stay home or in groups for protection, that's your choice and your right.

But we, collectively? If we just huddle and keep quiet things won't change and any "predators" will just be encouraged.
We need to go out there and claim the roads and public spaces. We need to state that this is our world and our space, too, and we have a right to move freely and without fear.

If enough women just dare and do it, if they walk in the dark and cycle across the country and travel alone, it will be accepted as normal eventually. Yeah, that's potentially dangerous for the individual. I'm aware. I do it anyways.

Easy to say when you live in Germany. We may still have the cultural baggage of misogyny, but most men here know that it is wrong and won't act on it. The same goes for most of Europe (with a gradient from the least risk in the North to more risky in the South).

 

[Heyo]

And how do you suggest we change that unfair situation?

Teach mothers to respect themselves so that they can teach their sons to respect women.

 

[Tamino]

Easy to say when you live in Germany. We may still have the cultural baggage of misogyny, but most men here know that it is wrong and won't act on it.

And how do you think we got to this point?!
Do you know what a ruckus it caused when the first women dared to wear trousers or get on a bicycle in Germany?

And still, a lot of women in Germany today won't walk alone in the dark. Which I do all the time. In the forest. In the park. In the center of Berlin.

The same goes for most of Europe (with a gradient from the least risk in the North to more risky in the South).

Yeah, well, I have also gone cycling and traveling alone in Italy, Albania, Israel, Minnesota, Suriname and Egypt.

I know it's potentially dangerous. And yes, I wouldn't go just anywhere, I would exercise caution in some areas that have a general high risk due to war or gangs or whatever.

But as long as it is just a regular city or country around the world? Areas you'd move around in in daylight with a guided group? Residential areas? - hell yeah, I'd go there on my own, walking or cycling, daylight or night.
Most men who would approach or harass a woman who's defying social expectation - they are kept away just fine by my "aura of arrogance".
And the ones that mean serious harm? They could catch me anywhere... in a parking lot, in my neighborhood... that risk will always remain and I won't let my life be ruled by that fear.

 

[Audie]

The best defence against becoming a victim, is not to look like a victim.

(Though it's not a guarantee, I doubt @Audie looks like a victim.)

Prrdators do though have an eye for potential
victims.
My small stature is a disadvantage, in that
regard.

 

[Heyo]

Prrdators do though have an eye for potential
victims.

Yes, that's what I mean.

My small stature is a disadvantage, in that
regard.

Stature is a factor, but posture is more important. Most predators are cowards who have a hate for people they perceive to be unfairly treated better than they deserve. They have the need to dominate their victim psychologically, not just physically. That is not so easy if the victim has a lot of confidence. They see the level of confidence in the victim's demeanour.
Again, general rule, no guarantee.

 

[Kathryn]

I agree with you, Heyo. I am picking up what you are putting down! LOL

I am not a small or short woman and I walk very confidently, I am not saying no crime against me could ever happen but it seems unlikely. The phrase "I pity the fool" comes to my mind.

 

[Audie]

I agree with you, Heyo. I am picking up what you are putting down! LOL

I am not a small or short woman and I walk very confidently, I am not saying no crime against me could ever happen but it seems unlikely. The phrase "I pity the fool" comes to my mind.

I am what you are not ie small- 41 kg.
I can shop in the children's dept.

Mom sent me to self- defense classes which served
me well in school. A sharp lesson or two, and
no more bullying. Confidence!

Still, city girls know to be wary. Esp in a foreign
city. In my case, I attended NYU.

I might be more specific if it could be a useful warning
to others but-anyway, surprise attack by someone well over twice my size. Easy victim for a coward.

No more chance of defense than me trying judo
on a submarine.

I've seen women a man would, yes, be a fool to attack.

I do envy the freedom you're able to enjoy.


ETA..just checked. Make that 42 kg, 92.59 lb

 

[Kathryn]

I am what you are not ie small- 41 kg.
I can shop in the children's dept.

Mom sent me to self- defense classes which served
me well in school. A sharp lesson or two, and
no more bullying. Confidence!

Still, city girls know to be wary. Esp in a foreign
city. In my case, I attended NYU.

I might be more specific if it could be a useful warning
to others but-anyway, surprise attack by someone well over twice my size. Easy victim for a coward.

No more chance of defense than me trying judo
on a submarine.

I've seen women a man would, yes, be a fool to attack.

I do envy the freedom you're able to enjoy.

I don't know if a man would be a fool to attack me, but he'd probably regret doing so. He would at the very least have to deal with a screaming banshee. But it's not my intention to shame you or call you out or whatever.

Hey, I learned ai ki do as a child! "Everything's a circle."