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God's naughty vulgar side?

excreationist

Married mouth-breather
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:
Ezekiel 23:1-4, 7-10, 14a, 17-20

A message from the Lord came to me. The Lord said, “Son of man, once there were two women. They had the same mother. They became prostitutes in Egypt. They have been unfaithful to me since they were young. In that land they allowed their breasts to be touched. They permitted their virgin breasts to be kissed. The older sister was named Oholah. The younger one was Oholibah. They belonged to me. Sons and daughters were born to them. Oholah stands for Samaria. And Oholibah stands for Jerusalem.

“....Oholah gave herself as a prostitute to all Assyria’s finest warriors. She made herself impure with the statues of the gods of everyone she longed for. She started being a prostitute in Egypt. And she never stopped. When she was young, men had sex with her. They kissed her virgin breasts. They used up all their sinful desires on her.

“So I handed her over to her Assyrian lovers. She longed for them. They stripped her naked. They took away her sons and daughters. And they killed her with their swords. Other women laughed when that happened. I was the one who had punished her.

“But Oholibah went even further with her sexual sins..... Then the Babylonians came to her. They went to bed with her. They had sex with her. They made her impure when they had sex with her. After they did it, she became sick of them. So she turned away from them. She acted like a prostitute who had no shame at all. She openly showed her naked body. I became sick of what she was doing. So I turned away from her. I had also turned away from her sister. But Oholibah offered her body to her lovers again and again. She remembered the days when she was a young prostitute in Egypt. There she had longed for her lovers. Their private parts seemed as big as those of donkeys. And their flow of semen appeared to be as much as that of horses.

According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.
 

dybmh

דניאל יוסף בן מאיר הירש
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:


According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.

It's memorable. :)

Maybe your expectations and limitations do not apply to God?

"my thoughts are not like your thoughts... etc... "
 

blü 2

Veteran Member
Premium Member
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:


According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.
My guess would be that your concept of God differs from the author's (or authors').
 

excreationist

Married mouth-breather
Personally I am a bit of a fan of "When she was young, men had sex with her. They kissed her virgin breasts" and "Their private parts seemed as big as those of donkeys. And their flow of semen appeared to be as much as that of horses"... I'd be interested in seeing a movie version of the passage... just as a way of understanding the Bible of course....
 

dybmh

דניאל יוסף בן מאיר הירש
Personally I am a bit of a fan of "When she was young, men had sex with her. They kissed her virgin breasts" and "Their private parts seemed as big as those of donkeys. And their flow of semen appeared to be as much as that of horses"... I'd be interested in seeing a movie version of the passage... just as a way of understanding the Bible of course....

What's happens in the mind's eye, is probably better than anything you'll see on screen. ;)
 

Eddi

Christianity, Taoism, and Humanism
Premium Member
I like how the author assumes the reader is familiar with the penis size and volume of ejaculation of donkeys and horses, as though those are everyday things
 

dybmh

דניאל יוסף בן מאיר הירש
I like how the author assumes the reader is familiar with the penis size and volume of ejaculation of donkeys and horses, as though those are everyday things

I know I'm not a horse. I know a horse is bigger than me.... so.... logically....
 

1213

Well-Known Member
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:


According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.
I can understand that it is surprising parable, especially when the scripture is about how Jerusalem and Samaria have been unfaithful to God. But, perhaps it was the best words to describe how vulgar the "sisters" have been, practicing idolatry in many disgusting ways.
 

excreationist

Married mouth-breather
What's happens in the mind's eye, is probably better than anything you'll see on screen. ;)
Actually I have aphantasia - level 5 - so I have no mind's eye....
2560px-Aphantasia_apple_test.png
 

excreationist

Married mouth-breather
I like how the author assumes the reader is familiar with the penis size and volume of ejaculation of donkeys and horses, as though those are everyday things
Apparently it is God himself speaking. He would be aware that the current reader would be familiar with these things, at least when I'm talking about myself.
 

Elihoenai

Well-Known Member
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:


According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.
Isaiah 45:7

7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things.



Elohim/God is Good and Evil. Elohim/God is Omni. The Satan/Devil is Elohim/God in its Lowest Form. The Full Expression of the Satan/Devil is Revealed in Serial Killers Murdering for Pleasure or Child Murderers and Abusers.

Christian Gnostics are on the Absolute Opposite Spectrum of the Full Expression of the Devil/Satan. Elohim/God is giving the Choice between Us Christian Gnostics and Barabbas.


THE PLEDGE - Trailer - HQ
 

Eddi

Christianity, Taoism, and Humanism
Premium Member
Apparently it is God himself speaking. He would be aware that the current reader would be familiar with these things, at least when I'm talking about myself.
He should have known that in the future people wouldn't be familiar with donky penises and sperm
 

Muffled

Jesus in me
This is from Ezekiel 23:

The highlights:


According to Ezekiel these are words from God himself. I didn't expect God to say things like that, especially the last two sentences about donkeys and horses.
I believe He knows all the words and uses what He pleases. That is the nice thing about being God; He doesn't need to answer for anything.
 

Muffled

Jesus in me
Personally I am a bit of a fan of "When she was young, men had sex with her. They kissed her virgin breasts" and "Their private parts seemed as big as those of donkeys. And their flow of semen appeared to be as much as that of horses"... I'd be interested in seeing a movie version of the passage... just as a way of understanding the Bible of course....
I suspect their is a great deal of hyperbole in those verses. You do realize God is doing a fictional story don't you?
 
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