Father Heathen
Veteran Member
Of course it can be painful when "friendships" fall apart, but it's better to be loathed for who you are than loved for who you are not.
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Have any of your friendships changed, or ended because you went back to faith...or left it?
- Thread starter Deidre
- Start date
Of course it can be painful when "friendships" fall apart, but it's better to be loathed for who you are than loved for who you are not.
ahhh, you have said the right thing at the right time. thank you, you are 100% right.
Jumi
Well-Known Member
Unless the religion interferes with relationships somehow, I don't see a reason to get upset. Having said that, sometimes the views of a friend could have a direct effect on you, if they join a notorious cult for example.
Jumi
Well-Known Member
The first one? I have it, but only played it for 5 minutes. It sounded like fun though.Hey, I get this line when I get an enchantment for my gear in the game Torchlight
Both parts actuallyThe first one? I have it, but only played it for 5 minutes. It sounded like fun though.
Yes, it is not easy to play these games.
Mackerni
Libertarian Unitarian
Wicca has always been curious to me. Interesting your parents are atheists now. My parents have always always ALWAYS been quite religious...Catholic upbringing, I had. There is a lot of beauty in the Catholic religion, but the RCC is need of some reform. That said, after being angry with the Church for a time during my deconversion, it is the one church I feel the most comfortable with, in terms of a worship service, I guess.
It's nice this site exists, for none of us judge each other.
Both of my parents were raised Catholic, but one of my great aunts gave everything to a cult that is sponsored by the Catholic Church.
To me, religion is a very personal thing. Nobody does all their spiritual rituals exactly like any other. Every Christian has his or her view of Christianity, thus creating a new belief system out of it.
I believe it is impossible to not judge. In fact, I think judgment is good ... gives someone a backbone. I don't believe you should judge someone based off of their spiritual views, unless of course that happens to harm others. I do judge ... that's why my parents and I would get into arguments in the first place.
Jumi
Well-Known Member
Second part I played for a while. I died in some kind of jungle so that was the end of it, couldn't be bothered to start a new one.Both parts actually
Yes, it is not easy to play these games.
Agree completely. Religion and spirituality should be a personal and somewhat private thing. Like how you say that nobody does all their spiritual rituals exactly like any other. True.
Yea, I believe there is a difference between judging and discernment. Discernment keeps us from quitting our job and running off to be a clown in the circus, etc. Not that I want to be a clown in the circus...just an example
But, judging is when we look at others and feel we are somehow better than them, and instead of yanking the weeds out of our yards, we get busy trying to tell others to yank theirs. Discernment is about protecting one's self from harm by making sound personal judgments. IMHO.
Timothy Bryce
Active Member
Sadly, there is someone I have in mind who has treated me differently since I've come back to faith. Not in a bad way, but was very interested in the friendship, and then changed as the past few weeks have gone on. Hardly hear from them anymore, and the only thing that has changed is me coming back to Christianity.
My thought is, this person was never a true friend to begin with, so there's always that conclusion. But, it still hurts.
Have you ever been through something like that with a friendship? (over your faith or lack thereof, just basically changing your position, and then the friendship changed?)
It surprises me to admit this - since I've never considered the question before - but I can definitely think of a number of times when people (regardless of the nature of my relationship with them) revealed their religious convictions and, without even really noticing it, my opinion of them had changed. It was presumptive on my part to assume that the way a certain colleague or friend would hold certain beliefs based on their talk and behaviour before I was kind of shocked by their revelations.
I suppose, ultimately, there is going to be a change in any relationship when there is a change in the entire outlook of the entire universe and why we are here. I would assume anyone who dismisses this is engaged in a relatively superficial relationship, which is fine. It's ironic that it seems as if a change of such beliefs would have more of a bearing on more profound relationships than superficial ones.
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BenTheBeliever
Active Member
I lost a close friend two yesrs back from high school cause of my Christian Faith. She knew even when we were teens that i was a Christian. I never preached st her or judge her fkr being a wiccan or for being gay even when she came out 8n facebook about it. My mom loved her like she was another daughter to her. When she needed us we were their no question asked. I did not onow until a few years back that she did not like me anymore cause i was a Christian. She did not like thst k posted Christian stuff on my facebook page. Ive been told by people on another board that it is my fault cause i should not post Christian stuff on my page. It is my page. I dont tell others what to post. I resoect peolle but i wont change my faith to please pe8ple. Being a Christian is who i am. It is a big part of my identity.
When Jesus cautioned about judging others - Matthew 7:1-4 - he was talking about personal judgment of another.
We are Not to impute a bad or wrong motive to another, but do appreciate a person's fine qualities.
Jesus never taught that we should wrongly judge God's judgment as recorded in Scripture - 2 Timothy 3:16-17
Rather, God's judgment on matters is the final authority on matters of what is good and bad, right and wrong.
A new belief system, or religious syncretism, can be traced back to mankind's religious tree's roots in ancient Babylon.
As the people migrated from ancient Babylon they took with them their non-biblical religious ideas and practices and spread them world wide into a greater religious Babylon or Babylon the Great. That is why we see similar or overlapping religious ideas and practices spread throughout the world's religious systems today. All Christians are to have the 1st-century view of the teachings of Jesus as recorded in Scripture. So, we can judge one's beliefs as either being in harmony with the 1st-century teachings of Christ or not.
If one's 'Christian' beliefs are Not found in the recorded 1st-century Scriptures then they are Not really Christian.
- Acts of the Apostles 20:29-30; Matthew 7:21-23
Desert Snake
Veteran Member
some people call xianity a cult
Desert Snake
Veteran Member
So what purpose does xianity hold to you, ...or rather, why would people want to be xiansAgree completely. Religion and spirituality should be a personal and somewhat private thing. Like how you say that nobody does all their spiritual rituals exactly like any other. True.
Yea, I believe there is a difference between judging and discernment. Discernment keeps us from quitting our job and running off to be a clown in the circus, etc. Not that I want to be a clown in the circus...just an example
But, judging is when we look at others and feel we are somehow better than them, and instead of yanking the weeds out of our yards, we get busy trying to tell others to yank theirs. Discernment is about protecting one's self from harm by making sound personal judgments. IMHO.
Jumi
Well-Known Member
Yes, cult isn't negative in itself. That's why I used notorious as qualifier.
I'd say if I could narrow it down to one thing (although there are numerous things)...it'd be that my relationship with Christ transcends anything and any human relationship I have in this life. To be unconditionally loved, and to strive to love others like that, is not something I've ever run across. Even my parents have expectations, while I know they claim to love me unconditionally. That said, His love is such that He wants a different life for His followers. He tells of a different way to live, and on the outside it might seem restrictive, but on the inside, it brings much freedom. When i was a Christian before, (before I left the faith) I didn't feel this way, and think that my faith would be defined as wanting to know Jesus, but never feeling like it was entirely possible. I looked to the Bible back then to tell me, or help me...but I always felt empty. I've had an experience of faith, and that has changed everything. If that makes sense, q.
Timothy Bryce
Active Member
If I may ask, what was this experience of faith?
This is helpful and I appreciate your candor.
I don't know if you'll believe me, you most likely won't lol But, I was not at all 'interested' in Jesus, Christianity, any of it...anymore. I had left it and while I was still seeking other paths, just to see what else might be out there, I identified as an atheist/agnostic. So it is surprising to me that I felt an experience of the Holy Spirit. Like an actual experience of it. And it changed everything, and I came back to the faith. This time though, I feel differently, and not obligated to follow a set of rules and laws, but I truly believe now. I think all my life, there were always so many doubts. It's nice to feel certain about my beliefs, now.
Aw, I'm sorry this happened.
I can only imagine that had to hurt. Hopefully, your friendship if it's meant to be, will come back to you both. 
I had a friend who was culturally Catholic, but ended up a born-again Christian. It affected our friendship, and possibly still does, although we are still friends. Whilst he might have his own way of describing this, I guess I'd make the following points from my personal, atheistic viewpoint, since I think it's worth seeing these things from 'both sides', so to speak;
1) His faith in and of itself never worried me too much. I have had some very Christian friends, I guess you could say. I don't care if you believe in God.
2) He was so excited in his new found faith he spoke about it a lot. I'm okay with that too, as long as you're listening as well as speaking. Otherwise we're not conversing...you're monologuing. Quite apart from having a different viewpoint, I hate being talked at.
3) There were specific issues where his opinion changed rapidly. Almost literally overnight. So homosexuality become a dangerous topic, as did discussions on whether there should be football games on Easter Friday, or about how we should determine refugee intakes. Age of the Earth was an interesting topic which came up once. He claimed humans and dinosaurs lived together, to which I asked him why he believed that. It wasn't a particularly fruitful discussion. He might see that as me being anti-faith, and in a sense he's right, but I'm certainly not anti-Christian. Pre-born again a natural response to any such claim would have been 'Why do you think that?' but once he was born again, such questions were more readily seen as a challenge to his faith (which...again...in a sense they are, depending on how you define 'faith')
His faith changed his views on things. Anything which changes your views will impact on friendships, and the more rapid the change the more potential change it involves. That isn't to argue people should suppress their faith or whatever. It just is.
1) His faith in and of itself never worried me too much. I have had some very Christian friends, I guess you could say. I don't care if you believe in God.
2) He was so excited in his new found faith he spoke about it a lot. I'm okay with that too, as long as you're listening as well as speaking. Otherwise we're not conversing...you're monologuing. Quite apart from having a different viewpoint, I hate being talked at.
3) There were specific issues where his opinion changed rapidly. Almost literally overnight. So homosexuality become a dangerous topic, as did discussions on whether there should be football games on Easter Friday, or about how we should determine refugee intakes. Age of the Earth was an interesting topic which came up once. He claimed humans and dinosaurs lived together, to which I asked him why he believed that. It wasn't a particularly fruitful discussion. He might see that as me being anti-faith, and in a sense he's right, but I'm certainly not anti-Christian. Pre-born again a natural response to any such claim would have been 'Why do you think that?' but once he was born again, such questions were more readily seen as a challenge to his faith (which...again...in a sense they are, depending on how you define 'faith')
His faith changed his views on things. Anything which changes your views will impact on friendships, and the more rapid the change the more potential change it involves. That isn't to argue people should suppress their faith or whatever. It just is.