I am getting recurring thoughts of disturbing deaths of myself. It's not that I try to think about it, they just come randomly and I don't thnk them up they just show up.
Anyways, it's usually been about disturbing ways of death scenarios lately.
My grandma a few years back was hit by a car and my aunts and uncles had to make the decision to pull the plug.
One of my thoughts is sort of based on that. I almost was hit walking my dog not too long ago. Then I keep imagining an actual being hit and faling scenario. The split second of being bumped hard, and falling, before smashing my head. Though it's only a second, it's a very disturbing second and it truly seems terrible regardless of how quick the light goes out.
Another thought is of a car wreck. Where I'd be driving unnecessarily fast, lose control, and imagining the last moments I see, from the driver's seat, me flying off the road, feel the weightlessness, seeing my car and me flying straight into the impact device. Not necessarily quick.
others are falling, drowning, collapsing things, and just a plain old heart attack.
It makes me wonder, what will it be? Now that I'm alive, I inevitably will face death. Death itself isn't what scares me, it is the process of dying.
We've all had near death experiences of some sort, cases where we barely survived, sometimes should've died but didn't. The relief of it stopping... but just think there will be a time when it doesn't stop, out of luck.
Perhaps the reason we haven't died in those scenarios is because something about ourselves does not accept death and creates the illusion of continued life. You may die hundreds of times, but what if there are parallel universes, multiple 'you's that have the same 'you' animating them. Each time you die in one universe, you jump to another, your mind will back track and erase all memories back to the point you last had a chance to survive, and in that universe the chance is taken. Never to die. Never to notice immortality either.
You may ask, "What about old age?" Well, perhaps you will find yourself alive at age 400 in some universe your self still resides. But it doesn't mean you'd notice immortality - I think the first rational explanation for it would have something to do with simply being known as "very lucky to still be alive! the oldest living perfect how do they do it???" reads the newspapers, and it would be accepted as that - luck, simply being the oldest on earth. Miraculous to some, scientific to others.
Just thoughts i had
Anyways, it's usually been about disturbing ways of death scenarios lately.
My grandma a few years back was hit by a car and my aunts and uncles had to make the decision to pull the plug.
One of my thoughts is sort of based on that. I almost was hit walking my dog not too long ago. Then I keep imagining an actual being hit and faling scenario. The split second of being bumped hard, and falling, before smashing my head. Though it's only a second, it's a very disturbing second and it truly seems terrible regardless of how quick the light goes out.
Another thought is of a car wreck. Where I'd be driving unnecessarily fast, lose control, and imagining the last moments I see, from the driver's seat, me flying off the road, feel the weightlessness, seeing my car and me flying straight into the impact device. Not necessarily quick.
others are falling, drowning, collapsing things, and just a plain old heart attack.
It makes me wonder, what will it be? Now that I'm alive, I inevitably will face death. Death itself isn't what scares me, it is the process of dying.
We've all had near death experiences of some sort, cases where we barely survived, sometimes should've died but didn't. The relief of it stopping... but just think there will be a time when it doesn't stop, out of luck.
Perhaps the reason we haven't died in those scenarios is because something about ourselves does not accept death and creates the illusion of continued life. You may die hundreds of times, but what if there are parallel universes, multiple 'you's that have the same 'you' animating them. Each time you die in one universe, you jump to another, your mind will back track and erase all memories back to the point you last had a chance to survive, and in that universe the chance is taken. Never to die. Never to notice immortality either.
You may ask, "What about old age?" Well, perhaps you will find yourself alive at age 400 in some universe your self still resides. But it doesn't mean you'd notice immortality - I think the first rational explanation for it would have something to do with simply being known as "very lucky to still be alive! the oldest living perfect how do they do it???" reads the newspapers, and it would be accepted as that - luck, simply being the oldest on earth. Miraculous to some, scientific to others.
Just thoughts i had
