I am me

[Kori]

All things are a matter of perspective.
The level at which one suffers anything depends upon how emotionally involved we get with the circumstance.
If one has a good perspective then they do not get so emotionally involved in circumstance but see the larger picture of how their suffering fits in with the rest of life.
When we can see that others suffer as well, sometimes through much worse circumstance it helps to endure what it is that we ourselves are experiencing.


Not long ago, this was home to over a million people .

Yeah ISIL is determined to kill rape repeat. BTW I am a huge supporter of those "terrorists" the YPJ.

 

[psychoslice]

The 5'10 120lbs of me. Yeah I weigh that little it's hard for me to gain weight.

Some people would kill to have your weight.

 

[Kori]

Some people would kill to have your weight.

two bad things from it. I do not know the medical name for it but because of it I sweat..a lot. High School was rough because of it. Plus it's hard to gain muscle. I am very weak.

 

[Milton Platt]

My name is Korey. I was born in Orlando, FL, United States of Oppression. My mother died shortly later and my father put me up for adoption, my grandmother adopted me, she lived in Sanford, and my father lived with her not that it made a difference since he has been in jail or prison on and off half of my 31 years of life. As a child I was happy although very sheltered and to be honest a moron. I cannot remember when but I think at age 12 I was sexually assaulted by a male. I blocked it out of my mind till I was like 25 or 26. However on Oct. 28 1998 she died and the world I ever knew crumbled. 6 months later my father got into a car crash and killed 2 unborn babies, he took a plea of 7 years, he was a horrible driver with a record of crashes. From Oct. 1998 till about a year and a half later I bounced around 5 different places, friends places, then on my 16th birthday I was put in a foster care group home. At age 17 I began to self educate myself. A little after I turned 18 I was on my own. It was good for awhile but I started to drink at 21. It was heavy but not a problem because I always drank alone, well until my father got out of prison. I let him live with me and I had some hatred towards him. We got into fist fights. From age 22-30 it's kinda a blur but I did quit heavy drinking because I got arrested for domestic violence against my father. My ex-stepmother was there but it was towards my father. Ever since I was 14 till now I have hated her. twice in my life she has attacked me. The first was at age 14 the second 31 and my father took her side both times. Moving on From then until recently things were not good. My first girlfriend and first love that I met in foster care used the idea of going to the police to claim rape was going on for a short time but I broke away from that quickly. My father kept on betraying me taking my ex-stepmothers side over mine. And recently I decided I want nothing more to do with him. I needed money for food and he wouldn't give me any, this as after he lost almost all my stuff, books, clothes, etc, and wont give me my cat back. I haven't had a Girlfriend or sex for that matter in over 10 years. 7+ I just couldn't trust again. 3+ I did ask for numbers and got some but it when nowhere. Not even a date. I am not into one night stands because I am afraid of STD's. Now there is a girl I love but she just came from a bad relationship and isn't willing to date. I know the feeling.

Sorry if this is unfocused it's just a lot of this is painful. And there is more to it. I have been betrayed a lot by "friends", family, my first love. It's not easy. But it could be worse I suppose. I'm not good at this sort of thing. Sorry.

Kori,
And I thought my childhood was screwed up.....so sorry.

 

[psychoslice]

two bad things from it. I do not know the medical name for it but because of it I sweat..a lot. High School was rough because of it. Plus it's hard to gain muscle. I am very weak.

Sorry I didn't realize that, is there a name for your condition ?.

 

[Kori]

Sorry I didn't realize that, is there a name for your condition ?.

I'm sure there is I just do not know it. I do know my metabolism is extremely high. I have to eat a lot just to break even. I once dropped down to 113lbs. And remember I'm 5'10

 

[psychoslice]

I'm sure there is I just do not know it. I do know my metabolism is extremely high. I have to eat a lot just to break even. I once dropped down to 113lbs. And remember I'm 5'10

What about that stuff that buts weight on in powder form, mass gainer, or something like that, the weight lifters take it ?.

 

[Kori]

What about that stuff that buts weight on in powder form, mass gainer, or something like that, the weight lifters take it ?.

I do not know how my body will react to it. I know it's not the same thing but drugs I am incredibly sensitive to. Like Xanax. I take 1/4 of one and I am out for 8 hours 20 minutes after I take it. And plenty of people can eat 3 and it relaxes them.

 

[lostwanderingsoul]

You know, a lot of people get comfort and peace from their religion but I am not sure Commieism is much help.

 

[psychoslice]

I do not know how my body will react to it. I know it's not the same thing but drugs I am incredibly sensitive to. Like Xanax. I take 1/4 of one and I am out for 8 hours 20 minutes after I take it. And plenty of people can eat 3 and it relaxes them.

When you go off with taking Xanax, do you mean asleep ?.

 

[Kori]

When you go off with taking Xanax, do you mean asleep ?.

Yes.

 

[psychoslice]

Yes.

But wouldn't be a good thing, that is if you take the medication before bed time ?.

 

[Kori]

But wouldn't be a good thing, that is if you take the medication before bed time ?.

Back when we were on good terms my father would give me a piece of his. I only took them when I had sleeping problems.

 

[psychoslice]

Back when we were on good terms my father would give me a piece of his. I only took them when I had sleeping problems.

I see, thanks for sharing, your brave.

 

[Kori]

I see, thanks for sharing, your brave.

I hate not getting sleep. When I am sleepy I do not even try to fight it.

 

[DawudTalut]

My name is Korey. I was born in Orlando, FL, United States of Oppression. My mother died shortly later and my father put me up for adoption, my grandmother adopted me, she lived in Sanford, and my father lived with her not that it made a difference since he has been in jail or prison on and off half of my 31 years of life. As a child I was happy although very sheltered and to be honest a moron. I cannot remember when but I think at age 12 I was sexually assaulted by a male. I blocked it out of my mind till I was like 25 or 26. However on Oct. 28 1998 she died and the world I ever knew crumbled. 6 months later my father got into a car crash and killed 2 unborn babies, he took a plea of 7 years, he was a horrible driver with a record of crashes. From Oct. 1998 till about a year and a half later I bounced around 5 different places, friends places, then on my 16th birthday I was put in a foster care group home. At age 17 I began to self educate myself. A little after I turned 18 I was on my own. It was good for awhile but I started to drink at 21. It was heavy but not a problem because I always drank alone, well until my father got out of prison. I let him live with me and I had some hatred towards him. We got into fist fights. From age 22-30 it's kinda a blur but I did quit heavy drinking because I got arrested for domestic violence against my father. My ex-stepmother was there but it was towards my father. Ever since I was 14 till now I have hated her. twice in my life she has attacked me. The first was at age 14 the second 31 and my father took her side both times. Moving on From then until recently things were not good. My first girlfriend and first love that I met in foster care used the idea of going to the police to claim rape was going on for a short time but I broke away from that quickly. My father kept on betraying me taking my ex-stepmothers side over mine. And recently I decided I want nothing more to do with him. I needed money for food and he wouldn't give me any, this as after he lost almost all my stuff, books, clothes, etc, and wont give me my cat back. I haven't had a Girlfriend or sex for that matter in over 10 years. 7+ I just couldn't trust again. 3+ I did ask for numbers and got some but it when nowhere. Not even a date. I am not into one night stands because I am afraid of STD's. Now there is a girl I love but she just came from a bad relationship and isn't willing to date. I know the feeling.

Sorry if this is unfocused it's just a lot of this is painful. And there is more to it. I have been betrayed a lot by "friends", family, my first love. It's not easy. But it could be worse I suppose. I'm not good at this sort of thing. Sorry.

Peace be on you.
1=Sympathies and prayers for you.
2=I noticed, in all these events, there is no mention of religion so it means those people who think religion is source of all troubles are not correct. There are many who have same or more problems as you are suffering.
3=IMHO, you can make a new start with Islam, your good qualities will get polished and weakness go away.

Good wishes.

 

[Buttercup]

I hadn't read this until just now, Kori. I'm sorry for your troubled childhood and young adulthood. You've definitely had some hard knocks.

You seem to have a sensibleness about you that's appealing and your attitude is a good too. I'm happy you found your way here. We can all be friends!

 

[Kori]

I hadn't read this until just now, Kori. I'm sorry for your troubled childhood and young adulthood. You've definitely had some hard knocks.

You seem to have a sensibleness about you that's appealing and your attitude is a good too. I'm happy you found your way here. We can all be friends!

Thank you. I suppose the good things to come out of all this is that my willpower has increased and, sometimes too much, I am more cautious of people.

 

[Buttercup]

sometimes too much, I am more cautious of people.

You'll figure out a good balance. I'm sure of that from what I've seen so far. Caution is a plus, just don't let it cripple your quality of living.

 

[Kori]

You'll figure out a good balance. I'm sure of that from what I've seen so far. Caution is a plus, just don't let it cripple your quality of living.

I guess as a result of that I have the mind frame of not wanting too many friends. I'm a hermit and in high school I never had any motivation to become popular. However in one High School people did respect me because I didn't hide from who I was, if someone didn't like a band I was into I didn't make excuses. In foster care it was pretty much the same way, I wasn't a sheep I was who I was. I guess not caring what people think of me also played a part.