I probably won't find a religion

[Agathion]

Make your own religion... its what I did and it has been working great.

 

[Hockeycowboy]

After much time searching, I don't think I'll find a religion. At least, not in the foreseeable future.

I gave up trying to find ages ago. Now, though, I don't think I'll get one even if I let it come on its own. The more I think about it, the more I realise I'm awkward, defiant and a special snowflake. I don't appear fit into a faith, and I doubt that I could fit into one, anyway.

I know what I believe and it's been standard for a long time. I have mixed feelings about the fact I know, deep down, that it will be difficult for me to follow one.

On one hand, I have only myself. I have no priests, no community and I can do my own thing. I can do whichever practises I like, believe what I like, do what I like (within reason).

On the other, the same is also a downfall. I would love to have a faith of my own. I would love to have the spiritual community both online and off.

I also have no religious scripture, holidays, clothing, language, places to worship nor congregate. I can look at them all, adopt them, even love them, but they are not mine; I'm an outsider to them. We have no attachment to each other. They do not make it to be part of me: they'd just be garments to wear, alter, and discard as I see fit.

My beliefs have no history. No future. Just me. Short of something life-changing, I will be walking across wild terrain. I won't bother making a path because nobody will follow it.

I'd compare myself like an ascetic travelling through the forests, but that'd be wrong. An ascetic gives it up to go it alone by choice. I'm closer to a benign wildman. Sometimes I steal food and clothes to get by or come to trade and then I go back to my forest alone. I could, most likely, survive in one of the villages (faiths), but I'd no longer be 'me'. I'd have to change who I am, what I do, what I think.

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.


Suggestions?

You seem like a very honest individual (and a slightly poetic one?), with a helpful, giving attitude.
Ultimately, though, religion shouldn't be about pleasing ourselves; but, rather, pleasing God.

You may not believe it, but doing that -- pleasing God -- really does bring happiness! Living the way God wants us to -- being honest, helpful and giving, like you seem -- results in close relationships with others, especially like-minded people.

 

[jimbo1174]

I don't think I ever will either bro. It's crazy. I don't know if I should even bother. What I feel conflicts a lot of others. So maybe it's best I be myself. You can too! Being you're self is awesome.