Is It Any Wonder Dating Is Tough For A Guy.

[MysticSang'ha]

Old joke....
Question: How does a man truly satisfy a woman?
Answer: Who cares?

It is a joke...right?

Right. Kind of like this -

Question: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: ONE....He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.

 

[Me Myself]

It shouldn't be a big deal to ask the girl what she prefers.

It shouldn´t.

But God(ess) clearly doesn´t care what should or not

 

[Me Myself]

The secret to peace & contentment for both genders (& those in between) is to realize that they won't understand each other.
Women are nuts. We must accept that.

And men are stupid. But we don't have to accept that.

You are both right. Men and women are stupid and nuts.

But women are specially nuts one day at the month and we are specially stupid to accept that .

 

[jamaesi]

It's not rape if you don't get periodic verbal consent... Any able-bodied person can communicate they are uncomfortable or unwilling with a certain situation. Let's not casually throw around accusations of rape.

No, actually, they can't always. I think you really need to read this and this.

Quite frankly, this thread is pretty terrifying for me at this point. :\ Let's not be causal about consent because people just "maneuvering into position" and waiting for a no that can not always be expressed is how rape can occur.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

“Using in-depth interviews with 43 college women who were, on average, 21 years old (SD = 0.79), the authors explored women’s attitudes toward and experiences of cunnilingus. The authors found that cunnilingus posed interactional challenges for women, but that these varied by relationship context. Drawing on scripting theory, the authors argue that the sexual scripts available to contemporary American college students assume cunnilingus in relationships, but not in hookups, where the incorporation of the practice is more contested. For individual women, tension emerged when their preferences for cunnilingus contradicted the sexual script of the relationship context. Women who desired cunnilingus in hookups had to be assertive to get it, whereas those who did not want cunnilingus in hookups were relieved that it was not expected. The taken-for-granted nature of cunnilingus in relationships was a source of pleasure for women who enjoyed it and of difficulty for women who wished to avoid it. In relationships, some women’s reluctance about cunnilingus was transformed by men’s enthusiasm. More generally, this study implies that ambiguity in sexual scripts may heighten the interactional challenges of sex by creating uncertainty about expectations and gaps between sexual scripts and individual preferences.”
source
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Christ, it isn't rocket science. Pay attention to what your partner enjoys and is comfortable with. Be open about what you enjoy and what you're comfortable with. If you can't do this, then wait a few years, grow up, and try again.
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[Engyo]

“Using in-depth interviews with 43 college women who were, on average, 21 years old (SD = 0.79), the authors explored women’s attitudes toward and experiences of cunnilingus. The authors found that cunnilingus posed interactional challenges for women, but that these varied by relationship context. Drawing on scripting theory, the authors argue that the sexual scripts available to contemporary American college students assume cunnilingus in relationships, but not in hookups, where the incorporation of the practice is more contested. For individual women, tension emerged when their preferences for cunnilingus contradicted the sexual script of the relationship context. Women who desired cunnilingus in hookups had to be assertive to get it, whereas those who did not want cunnilingus in hookups were relieved that it was not expected. The taken-for-granted nature of cunnilingus in relationships was a source of pleasure for women who enjoyed it and of difficulty for women who wished to avoid it. In relationships, some women’s reluctance about cunnilingus was transformed by men’s enthusiasm. More generally, this study implies that ambiguity in sexual scripts may heighten the interactional challenges of sex by creating uncertainty about expectations and gaps between sexual scripts and individual preferences.”
source
​

So what's a guy to do? Guess right and you're a hero.

Guess wrong and you're hash.

Hmmmm. I'd always expressed it as, "I want to do this (cunnilingus)", rather than "Do you want me to do this". Does that change the dynamic significantly?