Is it wrong to want to return home and leave this world

[Straw Dog]

Between you and me it does, but in truth, no.

Fair enough.

This is why communication must mostly be open rather than closed.

 

[Covellite]

I have experienced so much in my life, I have experience my true SELF in Consciousness after many years of depression, I have been in situations where I was almost murdered, I was raped as a young man, I was shot by some stranger that I never knew. But I am happy for all this that happened in my life, for it made me grow and understand the human race.
I realize that the human race is full of ignorance, that they don't know what they are doing, as Jesus said as he was being crucified.

What I am trying to say is that do you ever come to a decision that, its time to leave this world, that there is nothing more to learn. I am not necessarily talking about suicide, I am more towards just simply going home. A home that is our true haven, a home that we all have felt deep inside, its that calling that we experience when we are alone and truly down in life.

Many times I cut myself, I like the blood that runs from my arms, I usually in up in the psycho ward which I love, when I am there I feel safe and sound.

Ever since I was a child I felt like this this, I always felt like an alien from another planet, and always had the urge to return home, so has any one else ever felt like this ?.

Forgive me if I am wrong, but you suffered and maybe that was to much for you. Feeling like an alien - seems to me quite familiar - not so well accepted and loved by others. Maybe you find your way to handle with this baggage but it's sucking your strength. I guess when you cut yourself you are flirting with suicide. I don't know you, so I can't tell you how exactly to overcome this situation which is not perfect. If it's possible the best way is to find someone who would be very close and important to you, soulmate, someone to fall in love with or some creative kind of expression, like art and to be recognized as "above average".
Many thanks for your post!

 

[psychoslice]

Forgive me if I am wrong, but you suffered and maybe that was to much for you. Feeling like an alien - seems to me quite familiar - not so well accepted and loved by others. Maybe you find your way to handle with this baggage but it's sucking your strength. I guess when you cut yourself you are flirting with suicide. I don't know you, so I can't tell you how exactly to overcome this situation which is not perfect. If it's possible the best way is to find someone who would be very close and important to you, soulmate, someone to fall in love with or some creative kind of expression, like art and to be recognized as "above average".
Many thanks for your post!

Thank you, yes I have actually taken up oil painting, I wrote a book and I have other hobbies, life is going pretty good these days, just a little cut here are there lol.

 

[Quagmire]

I have definitely had plenty of "Isn't this movie over yet" moments.

That's when I usually declare an intermission.

 

[psychoslice]

I have definitely had plenty of "Isn't this movie over yet" moments.

That's when I usually declare an intermission.

What do you do in your intermission, if you don't mind me asking.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Forgive me if I am wrong, but you suffered and maybe that was to much for you. Feeling like an alien - seems to me quite familiar - not so well accepted and loved by others. Maybe you find your way to handle with this baggage but it's sucking your strength. I guess when you cut yourself you are flirting with suicide. I don't know you, so I can't tell you how exactly to overcome this situation which is not perfect. If it's possible the best way is to find someone who would be very close and important to you, soulmate, someone to fall in love with or some creative kind of expression, like art and to be recognized as "above average".
Many thanks for your post!

That could just as easily be a response to me. I hate this world of suffering and meaningless. There's a part of me that really wants to kill myself or otherwise just wants to run to death. Non-existence is preferable to this world.

 

[lostwanderingsoul]

Seems that most of the people answering this post are not Christians and the original poster has his own religion. Maybe searching different Christian religions would help. Many Christians find answers to their problems through their faith.

 

[Ralphg]

A segment from my book.

One night when I was just laying down to go to sleep I started to


drift away into what seemed to be a void, I just let myself go with

it, I drifted more and more into nothingness whatever that was.

All of a sudden I was gone? There was no me, there was only pure

space, I felt like I could see all the stars and planets, the whole Cosmos

was opening, I say that I felt these things but the truth is as I said I

wasn’t there.

There was a sense from within that this I was everything that there

IS, in those seconds or minutes I can’t recall, I could feel every single

soul, it was beautiful.

When I came back to the body − or was I always there? − I was

changed forever.

I remember I started to laugh, I didn’t really know why but it felt like

I just found something that I was searching for the whole of my life, I

wasn’t really searching for anything spiritual, well consciously that is,

and this thing that I found had no name, nothing, it was just a feeling

of great relief that every cell throughout my body knew of.

Now I was walking for the fi rst time on above the earths surface, I

now knew what Jesus meant by walking on the water, the crap of the

world was far below my feet, it could no longer touch me or harm

me.

Here you are obvious describing a Rapture, Exaltation or Vision (I don't know the correct word in English) and it's not uncommon to have the feeling of wanting to 'go home' after that. I've also had a few (see my profile) and started to search the Internet about it because I started to feel depressed too. I found an answer on a website made by Christian Nuns who had studied the fenomenon since they have had some Sisters who started to behave 'different' after saying they have had such an experience.
These feelings can occur by anyone who has had such an experience.

My advice is not to dwell to deep into that particular feeling because then it only grows stronger. You MIGHT (I say it like that because this can also have been triggered by the 'dark' forces in order to make you feel miserable here on earth) have felt now how wonderful the 'other side' feels in comparison to 'earthly' feelings and might start feeling this world is 'unreal', 'numb' or 'boring' and that's why you feel a longing to 'go home' now. I've had several periods spending weeks laying in bed, giving up several jobs and losing contact with family and friends because of this. Nowadays I feel a lot better and what helped was the decision (or understanding) to wait until I'm being 'called home' and never 'try to find home by myself' because I know than I run the risk of not finding the way back home at all. After this decision I even got 'clearer' in my head about the things I have 'seen' and even started to understand a lot more of it.

To be clear, I'm not saying you should forget your experience, not at all!! It's a Wonder these things happen but sometimes there are some unwelcome 'side-effect'. I hope you can turn those quickly into optimism and positivism.

Namaste

 

[psychoslice]

Here you are obvious describing a Rapture, Exaltation or Vision (I don't know the correct word in English) and it's not uncommon to have the feeling of wanting to 'go home' after that. I've also had a few (see my profile) and started to search the Internet about it because I started to feel depressed too. I found an answer on a website made by Christian Nuns who had studied the fenomenon since they have had some Sisters who started to behave 'different' after saying they have had such an experience.
These feelings can occur by anyone who has had such an experience.

My advice is not to dwell to deep into that particular feeling because then it only grows stronger. You MIGHT (I say it like that because this can also have been triggered by the 'dark' forces in order to make you feel miserable here on earth) have felt now how wonderful the 'other side' feels in comparison to 'earthly' feelings and might start feeling this world is 'unreal', 'numb' or 'boring' and that's why you feel a longing to 'go home' now. I've had several periods spending weeks laying in bed, giving up several jobs and losing contact with family and friends because of this. Nowadays I feel a lot better and what helped was the decision (or understanding) to wait until I'm being 'called home' and never 'try to find home by myself' because I know than I run the risk of not finding the way back home at all. After this decision I even got 'clearer' in my head about the things I have 'seen' and even started to understand a lot more of it.

To be clear, I'm not saying you should forget your experience, not at all!! It's a Wonder these things happen but sometimes there are some unwelcome 'side-effect'. I hope you can turn those quickly into optimism and positivism.

Namaste

Thanks for sharing, yes I don't wast time on trying to remember the experience because the experience wasn't that which I experienced, the experience is secondary to that which IS. Since my experience with was an Awakening, I realized that we are in truth already home, its only the mind that cannot see that we are home.

I no longer need to follow any path or religion, which I once did, in my realization I realized that the path or religion only kept me away from knowing that I was already there. I believe that the ego doesn't want anyone to awaken, for to do so is its death.

But I there is this mind body organism that I live through, and this body has a disposition of mental illness, just like if you have a heart disease, the ailment doesn't belong to me, so the mind body is still going to do what it does, but there is the realization that the body isn't me, and what it does isn't my business, its the ego's business.

 

[Twilight Hue]

Maybe it's practical to stop thinking exactly what's home and what's not. I don't think in reality no one has ever left nor arrived.

 

[Smart_Guy]

I have a similar problem. Sometimes I wish I can stay on front of my computer for ever, keeping my distance away from this stupid life. I sometimes complain at why Satan tricked us into descending Earth. I would be minding my own business doing nothing useful now in heaven. This is stupid.

I however am a man of faith. I'm already in this stupid life and complaining about it won't help. One has to accept their fate and deal with it. One has to stay strong to manage in this stupid life. Sometimes I hate myself and this stupid life. This is really stupid.

But Psy, I feel for ya bro. Your OP really touched me. You know I love ya, right? My thoughts are with you, my friend

 

[Covellite]

I am new one here and I begin to like this place a lot
As far as I can see, many open minded and free-spirit people. Really like this place.
About going home, depression, crazy world around... now one can tell you what to do. My concern is that we are now is our "theater" and that other people are roles in our play. We direct, we make a scene and we decide how long the play will last. Everything around me could be just a reflection of "all" of my complexities.
From time to time I feel strong urge to stop directing this play and it usually stops when I reach certain point. I go as far as I can, sometimes even touch the line between life and death (with breathing technique which I wouldn't recommend to do, I can be fatal) and after that I feel like a child again.
About privacy and distance: I work a lot on that issue. Not easy and I am not proficient in that field It involves a lot of magic and some crystals and minerals to. Making a good "privacy" grid takes a lot of time and some rare minerals, too.
To be continued

 

[Quagmire]

What do you do in your intermission, if you don't mind me asking.

Short answer: whatever I have to.

I've done everything from taking time off work, to telling friends to pretend we don't know each other for a while, to ending relationships, to (mostly when I was younger) putting everything my life was made up of in one big pile and just walking away from it all entirely.

Change is good therapy, whether it's temporary or permanent. Sometimes taking up a new hobby or breaking an bad habit is all it takes.

Sometimes it's just a matter of changing your schedule for a while: I've never been an early riser, but sometimes, when I just don't want to have the same day I had yesterday or the day before, I'll force myself into getting into a different sleep routine. I'll go to bed a few hours earlier and get up a few hours earlier. What I've found is that just by tweaking the time-clock a little, you can find yourself in a whole other world with different sights, smells, noises. . . even different people (and morning people seem to be friendlier for some reason).

 

[YmirGF]

I have experienced so much in my life, I have experience my true SELF in Consciousness after many years of depression, I have been in situations where I was almost murdered, I was raped as a young man, I was shot by some stranger that I never knew. But I am happy for all this that happened in my life, for it made me grow and understand the human race.
I realize that the human race is full of ignorance, that they don't know what they are doing, as Jesus said as he was being crucified.

What I am trying to say is that do you ever come to a decision that, its time to leave this world, that there is nothing more to learn. I am not necessarily talking about suicide, I am more towards just simply going home. A home that is our true haven, a home that we all have felt deep inside, its that calling that we experience when we are alone and truly down in life.

Many times I cut myself, I like the blood that runs from my arms, I usually in up in the psycho ward which I love, when I am there I feel safe and sound.

Ever since I was a child I felt like this this, I always felt like an alien from another planet, and always had the urge to return home, so has any one else ever felt like this ?.

Psycoslice, it's not wrong to want to return Home. A rather large part of you is There already. The thing is, you went to a considerable effort to make this life and there is much for you to see and to give. Don't worry, you'll be back before too long, so try to make the best of things while you are here. One of my hard and fast rules is to live each moment as if it were your last moment on earth. That really helps to retain focus. It makes that cup of coffee taste better. It makes the cool rain feel more special. It makes hearing the birds singing even sweeter. It helps to focus on that little child who chooses to grace you with a splendid smile. It helps to remember that the pain wont last forever.

 

[YmirGF]

What I've found is that just by tweaking the time-clock a little, you can find yourself in a whole other world with different sights, smells, noises. . . even different people (and morning people seem to be friendlier for some reason).

I like your answer very much and chuckled when I saw the part about altering ones routine. That is a genuine key for lessening the effects of depression, at least it certainly was for me. As far as sleep routines. I'm one of those birds who simply has never needed much sleep. 5 hours tops. 3-4 hours is the norm and if I awaken after 7:30 in the morning I usually moan, "Egads, the day is half over!"

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I sometimes complain at why Satan tricked us into descending Earth.

That is a very interesting concept. Can you expand on that? I wasn't aware that Islam taught that we were tricked by Satan into coming to this world.

 

[psychoslice]

Short answer: whatever I have to.

I've done everything from taking time off work, to telling friends to pretend we don't know each other for a while, to ending relationships, to (mostly when I was younger) putting everything my life was made up of in one big pile and just walking away from it all entirely.

Change is good therapy, whether it's temporary or permanent. Sometimes taking up a new hobby or breaking an bad habit is all it takes.

Sometimes it's just a matter of changing your schedule for a while: I've never been an early riser, but sometimes, when I just don't want to have the same day I had yesterday or the day before, I'll force myself into getting into a different sleep routine. I'll go to bed a few hours earlier and get up a few hours earlier. What I've found is that just by tweaking the time-clock a little, you can find yourself in a whole other world with different sights, smells, noises. . . even different people (and morning people seem to be friendlier for some reason).

That sound like you are pretty well disciplined with your life, some great ideas there which I wouldn't mind trying. I am a morning person myself, I like to get out and do some walking and then have coffee in my favourite coffee shop, where I do my reading, then I'm off to home before the crowd comes alive lol.

 

[psychoslice]

Psycoslice, it's not wrong to want to return Home. A rather large part of you is There already. The thing is, you went to a considerable effort to make this life and there is much for you to see and to give. Don't worry, you'll be back before too long, so try to make the best of things while you are here. One of my hard and fast rules is to live each moment as if it were your last moment on earth. That really helps to retain focus. It makes that cup of coffee taste better. It makes the cool rain feel more special. It makes hearing the birds singing even sweeter. It helps to focus on that little child who chooses to grace you with a splendid smile. It helps to remember that the pain wont last forever.

That was very nicely said, and yes I am beginning to see all that in my life, being here in the Now, like you said, makes the coffee taste better, and yes you do see the world completely different, again nicely said and thanks.

 

[Smart_Guy]

That is a very interesting concept. Can you expand on that? I wasn't aware that Islam taught that we were tricked by Satan into coming to this world.

I mean tricking Adam and Eve into eating the apple. I think this makes all of humanity tricked into it. Satan knew there would be consequences if they fell into it and defy Gods instructions.

Isn't this similar to Christianity?

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I mean tricking Adam and Eve into eating the apple. I think this makes all of humanity tricked into it. Satan knew there would be consequences if they fell into it and defy Gods instructions.

Isn't this similar to Christianity?

Oh, that's what you mean. Yes, that's what most of Christianity believes.