"Is Masturbation an Acceptable Component to Healthy Sexuality for Christians?" Two Views

[BilliardsBall]

I'll take your silence on the definition of masturbation as an admission that partners can indulge in it.


So, it's immoral to sexually desire someone else unless it's one's spouse? I hope you realize that this makes just about every grown person on earth guilty of an immoral act. An act one does not choose, but is ingrained in the human character. A desire your god gave us in the form of our libido. So, in so far as masturbation goes, just what harm is created by resolving ones god-given libido through this solitary act?

Thing is, masturbation is good for a person, married or not. Here are 12 + 1 reasons why women should masturbate. (Admittedly #9 isn't so much a reason as it's something to keep in mind.)

13 Reasons Every Woman Should Masturbate Regularly

1. It makes you happier: . . .Pleasure makes people feel good.

2. You become more comfortable with your body: Your body should be your best friend — it’s one of the only things that will be with you your entire life.

3. It can improve your sex life: Masturbation allows you to explore your body and find out what feels best.

4. It helps you sleep: Orgasms physically and emotionally relieve tension and exhaust the body, which allow you to fall asleep quicker

5. It’s a great way to release sexual tension: If you’ve chosen to not have sex or are simply going through a dry spell, masturbating is a great way to satisfy your libido.

6. Masturbating can ease body aches and menstrual pain: If you have a uterine contraction while self-stimulating and a uterine contraction can help menstrual blood come out faster... theoretically it’s going to help with cramps.

7. It relieves stress: Anything that makes you feel more relaxed and gets you to turn off the day, whether you do yoga or get a foot massage, it’s all the same thing.

8. Masturbation helps your body stay sexual... even when you’re not having sex: If you’re between partners, there’s a very strong benefit to keeping things going by self-stimulating — not only in terms of keeping the tissues elastic and healthy and increasing blood flow, but just getting your brain going.

9. There are tons of cool gadgets to help you masturbate: From hands-free vibrators to buzzing faux lip stick bottles, there’s a vibrator for every lady.

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10. If you’re in a relationship, it’s a great way to mix things up — and keep you coming back for more: The more sex you have, the more sex you’ll want to have. It follows that the more you masturbate and become comfortable being sexual with your own body, the more you’ll want to be sexual with your partner.

11. Multiple. Orgasms: Understanding how your body works helps you know exactly how to pleasure it.

12. There are no downsides to it: Masturbation has “absolutely zero negative effects,

13. It feels f*&^%$! amazing: No explanation needed.
source

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Masturbation can be accompanied by fantasization that is inappropriate. Look online to see whether masturbatory couples indulge in sex less or more than those who abstain from it.

 

[ADigitalArtist]

Masturbation is inappropriate, then, for those not lusting for their wedded partner. Do you disagree?

I mean, are you asking me personally or acv9rding to Christian religious belief? Because most I know would say lust is inappropriate full stop. But mutual masturbation can totally be done with your wedded partner and for your wedded partner. (Speaking from experience.)

 

[ADigitalArtist]

Masturbation can be accompanied by fantasization that is inappropriate. Look online to see whether masturbatory couples indulge in sex less or more than those who abstain from it.

That wouldn't be a fair metric because not every couple has equal libido. Masturbation can help compensate for that, as well aid with some hormone, sleep and stress disorders without what could be an unreasonable expectation of your partner, if their desire for sex isn't equal to yours.

 

[Skwim]

Masturbation can be accompanied by fantasization that is inappropriate.

How about fantasies that are appropriate? What about masturbating with them?

Look online to see whether masturbatory couples indulge in sex less or more than those who abstain from it.

A decent poster usually provides such online evidence, but in as much as it's too much trouble for you . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .




. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Well, imagine that, I couldn't find a single statistic. So, the balls in your court. If you want to make your point you're going to have to come up with the stats yourself. Otherwise, I'll take it that you have no point.

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[Skwim]

OK, two people the opposite side of the same coin talking about things that are not relevant to anyone but selling their books and images. The girl is not attractive and clearly masturbates because she cannot get good sex. The guy is probably gay and is ashamed when he masturbates for what he sees.

I'm straight I can't relate to this conversation.

Don't have to. Just answer the questions........................if you like.

So, where do you stand? Is masturbation an acceptable component to healthy sexuality for Christians?

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[Searching1981]

Don't have to. Just answer the questions........................if you like.

So, where do you stand? Is masturbation an acceptable component to healthy sexuality for Christians?

.​

OK, fine, I'll share my true honest history with Masturbation and Sex. I'm not taking it to you Skwim for starting this, you created an interesting conversation.

Now, I drink daily (European brews not Pilsners don't drink Pilsners that's Puritan drink meant to punish you) I roll my own cigarettes (Pure Tabacco like our ancestors smoke is both cheap and does not have the chemicals those boxed brands have) I roll a joint ever now and then and when dispensaries open in California I will smoke more. So, that is the extent of how much of a Degenerate I am. I am not ashamed of it, I'm open about it, and not only do I not feel guilty I hope people get over death to do the same.

But, oddly I do not masturbate and I do not watch porn. Now, you all think I'm lying but let me explain what life is like both before the internet, with my body, and with my conscience.

For the young lads on this forum before the internet Porn was something to be ashamed of. To get porn you generally had to go to the most seedy area of your town where a porn shop was located with an entrance in the back and go in and buy something and leave quick before anyone saw you. You could go the path of getting porn through the mail but you had to worry about whether your mailman would tell your neighbors and only really, really dicey magazines had the ads.

Now, let us go to this further. It wasn't shameful to watch porn because of religion, it was shameful because it meant you couldn't have real sex, "that guy is such a loser he can't get a woman on his own, he has to go to the porn shops." The stereotype of the porn consumer was a fat slob who just could not get a date. It was very shameful.

So, I always had it in me to be ashamed of porn. Not on religious grounds but because I always wanted to be with the cool kids.

Now, let us go further. I talk about bum bodies of mind on here, but I have to honestly admit I have a bum body for sex. Let me explain. I do lift weights and exercise (weight lifting makes the blood flow to your junk and makes it rise to attention better) but my junk is not very sensitive. Why? I am not circumcised. The pleasure center on your junk for men is on the top of the Head so if you have foreskin there it's like wearing an additional condom. In fact, for men not circumcised the first time you have sex it hurts; that 's the first time you pull and break your foreskin and that is the first time your Head is exposed which is raw and hurts.

So, it's very easy for me not to watch porn because the satisfaction I get is not so much in my Junk but the intimacy with my soul mate.

This is getting long so cheers!

 

[BilliardsBall]

I mean, are you asking me personally or acv9rding to Christian religious belief? Because most I know would say lust is inappropriate full stop. But mutual masturbation can totally be done with your wedded partner and for your wedded partner. (Speaking from experience.)

I agree. Lust for other than's one's wedded partner is a danger per my understanding of the scriptures. Mutual masturbation for a married couple would be okay.

 

[BilliardsBall]

That wouldn't be a fair metric because not every couple has equal libido. Masturbation can help compensate for that, as well aid with some hormone, sleep and stress disorders without what could be an unreasonable expectation of your partner, if their desire for sex isn't equal to yours.

I think the answer, then, would depend on one's religious convictions. But in the same vein, there are those who advocate pornography as masturbatory material that might give a safe outlet to a criminal (pedophile, rapist) and others who understand pornography and masturbation can exacerbate problems rather than relieving them.

 

[BilliardsBall]

How about fantasies that are appropriate? What about masturbating with them?



A decent poster usually provides such online evidence, but in as much as it's too much trouble for you . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .




. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Well, imagine that, I couldn't find a single statistic. So, the balls in your court. If you want to make your point you're going to have to come up with the stats yourself. Otherwise, I'll take it that you have no point.

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If you are married and fantasize about your married partner, and they know that you are, you'd be set, right?

For many men and some women, there is a refractory period following masturbation. One masturbates at 5 PM and is unable to be erect at 5:30 when one's spouse desires sex. But certainly, it was necessary to find peer-reviewed papers to explain this to you? Give me a break.

Men who masturbate to porn or etc. are far less sexual with their spouses. Surely you can find Gallup polls on this subject.

 

[Skwim]

If you are married and fantasize about your married partner, and they know that you are, you'd be set, right?

The Catholic faith isn't particularly logical, so I don't know. Would you be set?

For many men and some women, there is a refractory period following masturbation. One masturbates at 5 PM and is unable to be erect at 5:30 when one's spouse desires sex.

So what?

But certainly, it was necessary to find peer-reviewed papers to explain this to you? Give me a break.

You're the one who said I should go online to see whether masturbatory couples indulge in sex less or more than those who abstain from it. If you're unable to find this information why do you expect I can, or even care to?

Men who masturbate to porn or etc. are far less sexual with their spouses.

And . . . . . . . ?

How about those who have no spouse?

Surely you can find Gallup polls on this subject.

Why would I care to? You're the one who's interested in this particular aspect of masturbation. Not me. Do your own leg work, lazy bones.

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[BilliardsBall]

The Catholic faith isn't particularly logical, so I don't know. Would you be set?


So what?


You're the one who said I should go online to see whether masturbatory couples indulge in sex less or more than those who abstain from it. If you're unable to find this information why do you expect I can, or even care to?


And . . . . . . . ?

How about those who have no spouse?


Why would I care to? You're the one who's interested in this particular aspect of masturbation. Not me. Do your own leg work, lazy bones.

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Okay, if I prove to you from sources that masturbation is destructive, not constructive, to your partner, will you stop masturbating? Because I want to spend my time constructively, not to be mocked only.

 

[ADigitalArtist]

I think the answer, then, would depend on one's religious convictions. But in the same vein, there are those who advocate pornography as masturbatory material that might give a safe outlet to a criminal (pedophile, rapist) and others who understand pornography and masturbation can exacerbate problems rather than relieving them.

I'm unconvinced the supposed problems in that vein aren't putting conclusions before data, similar to the oft claimed and yet unsupported claim that playing videogames makes you violent.
I have problems with the pornography industry, but not masturbation.

 

[ADigitalArtist]

Men who masturbate to porn or etc. are far less sexual with their spouses. Surely you can find Gallup polls on this subject.

Once again, even if there was a correlation between lower amounts of coitus with higher amounts of masturbation, that does not mean masturbation is the cause. Unbalanced libido between the two spouses lead to less sex. Would be natural for the partner with more libido to masturbate.

 

[Skwim]

Okay, if I prove to you from sources that masturbation is destructive, not constructive, to your partner, will you stop masturbating? Because I want to spend my time constructively, not to be mocked only.

Yes! YES! YES! I, Skwim, will stop masturbating if you prove to me from sources that masturbation is destructive to my partner---I never considered masturbation necessarily constructive to anyone's partner.
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So, bring on your proof, BB. but also answer my questions you're ignoring.

1. The Catholic faith isn't particularly logical, so I don't know. Would you be set?​

2. So what?

3. And . . . . . . . ?

4. How about those who have no spouse?​

.

​

 

[BilliardsBall]

I'm unconvinced the supposed problems in that vein aren't putting conclusions before data, similar to the oft claimed and yet unsupported claim that playing videogames makes you violent.
I have problems with the pornography industry, but not masturbation.

I think that is a sensible point of view you have.

However, I would say that their are strong correlations between masturbation and/or "excessive" masturbation and decreased lovemaking with a partner, unhealthy objectification of partners, etc.

 

[BilliardsBall]

Once again, even if there was a correlation between lower amounts of coitus with higher amounts of masturbation, that does not mean masturbation is the cause. Unbalanced libido between the two spouses lead to less sex. Would be natural for the partner with more libido to masturbate.

I'm aware of the natural. I think the biblical admonition makes more sense. The partner with the lower drive would try to elevate their drive, enjoy their partner more, give less reason for masturbation (and adultery, prostitution, pornography, etc.).

 

[BilliardsBall]

Yes! YES! YES! I, Skwim, will stop masturbating if you prove to me from sources that masturbation is destructive to my partner---I never considered masturbation necessarily constructive to anyone's partner.
​

So, bring on your proof, BB. but also answer my questions you're ignoring.

1. The Catholic faith isn't particularly logical, so I don't know. Would you be set?​

2. So what?

3. And . . . . . . . ?

4. How about those who have no spouse?​

.

​

Please tell me about your anecdotal experiments regarding abstinence from masturbation. What did you learn?

Your points 1-4 are not questions I can make sense of, please rephrase. Thanks!

 

[ADigitalArtist]

I'm aware of the natural. I think the biblical admonition makes more sense. The partner with the lower drive would try to elevate their drive, enjoy their partner more, give less reason for masturbation (and adultery, prostitution, pornography, etc.).

I don't see any reason to think libido is something you can will into being. It's hormone driven.
I, for example, just have more libido then my husband. When he feels like engaging sexually I welcome it. But when he doesn't, I don't try and force him to. And, when he does, he doesn't usually have the stamina to preform at my level. (And yes, it was like this when we were teenagers and has been so for decades.) I masturbate. Sometimes alone, sometimes when we're together. Sometimes he does it for me. I'm not ashamed of it, and he's not ashamed of it. Why should we be?

 

[Skwim]

Please tell me about your anecdotal experiments regarding abstinence from masturbation. What did you learn?

Excuse me! Just where have you proven to me from sources that masturbation is destructive to my partner---THEE condition of my cessation of masturbating?

Your points 1-4 are not questions I can make sense of, please rephrase. Thanks!

No.

If you can't go back to the previous relevant posts to figure them out then I'm assuming your not competent to answer them, just as you appear incompetent to prove to me from sources that masturbation is destructive to my partner.

All of which leads me to bid you adieu.

Have a nice day.

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[BilliardsBall]

I don't see any reason to think libido is something you can will into being. It's hormone driven.
I, for example, just have more libido then my husband. When he feels like engaging sexually I welcome it. But when he doesn't, I don't try and force him to. And, when he does, he doesn't usually have the stamina to preform at my level. (And yes, it was like this when we were teenagers and has been so for decades.) I masturbate. Sometimes alone, sometimes when we're together. Sometimes he does it for me. I'm not ashamed of it, and he's not ashamed of it. Why should we be?

I never said one should be ashamed when masturbating. I'm defending the Christian viewpoint of masturbation accompanied by fantasization (lust) as inappropriate for Christian believers. But I will say that millions of non-Christians have felt ashamed of their lusts, greed, covetous nature, etc. which also aligns with a scriptural worldview.