Is Spanking Children immoral to you?

[Jinse]

I actually saw my present boyfriend being hit by his dad back when we were 7 years old if my memory serves me right. He even coughed out blood once because of that. -_- Saw that a lot of times. He did not have low IQ-he is actually highly intellectual. If there is any effect on him I think its psychological and emotional. He became an introvert, moody, perfectionist and easily gets irritated when committing mistake . So it is not healthy. For me.

 

[Quintessence]

I didn't say that. I asked if the outcomes are the same, how do you propose to distinguish between them?

Physical discipline?

"Drop and give me twenty!"



Or martial arts. Sports. Dance. Things that require... physical discipline.

Yes, I know that's not really what you meant, but hey... it could work. When your kid misbehaves, make them run through some yoga poses or something.

 

[Mister Emu]

There are several sources of scientific information on spanking listed on this website (near the end), for those looking for more information on the subject.

Thanks.

 

[doppelganger]

I actually saw my present boyfriend being hit by his dad back when we were 7 years old if my memory serves me right. He even coughed out blood once because of that. -_- Saw that a lot of times. He did not have low IQ-he is actually highly intellectual.

You can't know from just observing one person. He could have been even smarter and better functioning than he is had he not been beaten as a child.

It's an effect that will only be observable in the aggregate. The claim is not "everyone who gets spanked as a child will be stupid". The research shows that spanking children generally correlates to reduced intelligence.

 

[Jinse]

You can't know from just observing one person. He could have been even smarter and better functioning than he is had he not been beaten as a child.

I know.

It's an effect that will only be observable in the aggregate. The claim is not "everyone who gets spanked as a child will be stupid". The research shows that spanking children generally correlates to reduced intelligence.

And yes I did not point out that- "everyone who gets spanked as a child will be stupid". I just told what I have observed. I think you misunderstood me. ^_^

 

[doppelganger]

I think you misunderstood me. ^_^

Yeah, I think I did, too. D'oh! Sorry.

 

[Songbird]

I really regret ever spanking my kids. I started out being very anti-spanking, to be countered by every friend and family member on how spanking was the best discipline. Added to that was a low self-awareness, suppressed unhappiness, and high anxiety, and I started swatting my toddlers - which weakened my resolve to find other parenting methods. I never used an implement, and it was always when I was at the end of my rope and beyond frustrated. But it took a few years to figure out how to deal with my own issues before I could deal with my parenting issues.

 

[waitasec]

then this is pretty much bunk...
proverbs 13:24 Whoever spares the rod hates their children,
but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

 

[Jinse]

Yeah, I think I did, too. D'oh! Sorry.

Just pointed out the effect that I was able to see on him that I can link to spanking children which also convinced me personally to tell that it is not a healthy way to discipline children.^_^

 

[Sunstone]

then this is pretty much bunk...
proverbs 13:24 Whoever spares the rod hates their children,
but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.

Because, as Stephen says, nothing shows your love for your family like your willingness to whale on them.

 

[waitasec]

Because, as Stephen says, nothing shows your love for your family like your willingness to whale on them.

what a brute..
:sarcastic

 

[doppelganger]

Because, as Stephen says, nothing shows your love for your family like your willingness to whale on them.

Though, to be clear, there's a theological/psychological framework specifically associated with that very idea in much of organized religion, and mainstream Christianity in particular.

 

[Sunstone]

Though, to be clear, there's a theological/psychological framework specifically associated with that very idea in much of organized religion, and mainstream Christianity in particular.

Yes, and organized religion is arguably more about social control than spirituality.

 

[Kerr]

As a child I did a lot of stupid and bad things but my parents managed to deal with that without spanking. So I think you can raise kids without resorting to such methods .

 

[Jinse]

Has anyone read about this book? Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I was able to read part of it and it says that children who was raised strictly has a greater tendency to become more successful in life.

 

[waitasec]

Though, to be clear, there's a theological/psychological framework specifically associated with that very idea in much of organized religion, and mainstream Christianity in particular.

i just wonder how some reconcile the word of god as to not only condoning but enforcing this type of discipline with regard to the psychological ramifications of that extreme act.


just another implication of man creating god in their image i suppose.

 

[doppelganger]

I was able to read part of it and it says that children who was raised strictly has a greater tendency to become more successful in life.

Only if you have a particular notion of what "successful" means. If you mean the accumulation of money and social power, then yes. Also, be careful not to confuse being raised strictly with using corporal punishment. A series of well-thought out rewards and productive negative stimuli can be used to reinforce strict standards for a child's behavior. And, according to research, will do so much better than hitting them.

 

[Sunstone]

Has anyone read about this book? Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I was able to read part of it and it says that children who was raised strictly has a greater tendency to become more successful in life.

Is success the same as happy? In my experience, a lot of successful people I know -- I know several multi-millionaires and two billionaires -- appear to be no happier than people making a lot less than them.

 

[doppelganger]

i just wonder how some reconcile the word of god as to not only condoning but enforcing this type of discipline with regard to the psychological ramifications of that extreme act.

The whole worldview is often built precisely around extreme discipline from tyrannical father figure - fashioned as "loving." And in that frame of reference - it is.

 

[doppelganger]

Is success the same as happy? In my experience, a lot of successful people I know -- I know several multi-millionaires and two billionaires -- appear to be no happier than people making a lot less than them.

Bingo.

The Overjustification Effect « You Are Not So Smart

According to the research, in modern America the average income required to be happy day-to-day, to experience “emotional well being” is about $75,000 a year. According to the researchers, past that point adding more to your income “does nothing for happiness, enjoyment, sadness, or stress.” A person who makes, on average, $250,000 a year has no greater emotional well-being, no extra day-to-day happiness, than a person making $75,000 a year. In Mississippi it is a bit less, in Chicago a bit more, but the point is there is evidence for the existence of a financiohappiness ceiling. The super-wealthy may believe they are happier, and you may agree, but you both share a delusion.


If you don’t already have it, money can improve your life and make you happier, but once you have enough to go to Red Lobster on Tuesday night without worrying about paying the water bill that month, you’re good to go. Or, as Henry David Thoreau once said, “A man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone.” In the modern United States the ability to let most things alone, according to Kahneman and Deaton’s research, costs about $75,000 a year.