Is Spanking Children immoral to you?

[The Sum of Awe]

If you wouldn't hit an adult,
you shouldn't hit a child.

If an adult could take you to court over it,
assault, whatever,
why should a child be subject to the same violation,
simply because they are a child?

I would definitely hit an adult if they did something that is childish and is bad

And I wouldn't hit a child over not sharing a cookie

But you do raise a good point.

 

[The Sum of Awe]

BTW, I want to thank you all for getting 7 pages in this thread over night

 

[The Sum of Awe]

Do you really go to jail for smacking someone in the USA? That's a bit extreme!

Yes,

America is the place where you can sue Starbucks because their coffee is hot and get away with murdering your child

 

[waitasec]

It said "punish" not beat. But that is the way I see it. You can punish someone without laying a hand on them. I won't try and talk you out of what you think, that would be useless, but that is what I believe.

but somehow punishing sheep for not going where they are supposed to be going does seem a little excessive...

 

[Wannabe Yogi]

I have known parents who spanked there kids and the children grow up to be very nice well adjusted human beings. I have also heard arguments that certain "types" of kids might do better with physical punishment. So I understand the need.

My feeling is that physical discipline is an easy way for parents to feel like they are setting limits for their children. So for many parents it makes sense to spank.

I personally am a large proponent of attachment parenting. I see physical discipline as unnecessary and punishment ( of any type) for many children as an occasional need to be used sparingly. If the parent child relation ship is close enough the need for correction becomes less. Just the likes and dislikes of the parent becomes a powerful reinforcer for the child. Even the western "adolescent rebellion stage" of life is due to the difficulty of parenting in the modern world and the lack of closeness our society creates problems between parent and child.

 

[waitasec]

i am not a big fan of bringing up a clone of myself
i often find myself apologizing to my son when i see myself in him

 

[ChristineES]

but somehow punishing sheep for not going where they are supposed to be going does seem a little excessive...

I was going to respond but I changed my mind. You once again took what I said and twisted it around. I guess I should be used to that.

Edit: I said nothing about punishing sheep. That was an example of what a rod was used for. That is not the same thing as punishment. If someone murders someone, they go to jail- that is punishment. If a child punches his brother in the face, the parents send to his room for the day- that, too, is punishment.

 

[waitasec]

I was going to respond but I changed my mind. You once again took what I said and twisted it around. I guess I should be used to that.

Edit: I said nothing about punishing sheep. That was an example of what a rod was used for. That is not the same thing as punishment. If someone murders someone, they go to jail- that is punishment. If a child punches his brother in the face, the parents send to his room for the day- that, too, is punishment.

you brought up sheep... not i
you brought up the notion that the rod was to steer sheep in the right direction
the proverb says punish a child with the rod...
so really punishing a child with a rod doesn't mean to steer a child in the right direction as one doesn't punish sheep for going in the wrong direction
as the proverb doesn't say use the rod to steer your child in the right direction

 

[ChristineES]

Oh, and the rod mentioned in Proverbs was symbolism of God guiding us.

 

[Banner]

If a kid misbehaves do you believe it's okay to spank them?

Reminisce I say spank not shoot Seems like quite a few got that confused when I asked that on yahoo answers.

Yes it is okay imo. But I don't think it should be an automatic. Some children might never "need" a spanking.

 

[ChristineES]

you brought up sheep... not i
you brought up the notion that the rod was to steer sheep in the right direction
the proverb says punish a child with the rod...
so really punishing a child with a rod doesn't mean to steer a child in the right direction as one doesn't punish sheep for going in the wrong direction
as the proverb doesn't say use the rod to steer your child in the right direction

It's called symbolism. But punishment, done the right way, can be a guiding force. Your parents must have punished you for various things, without beating you- time outs, grounding, etc.

 

[Banner]

Hmm...I'm thinking the form of discipline isn't as much of the issue as the attitude behind it.

 

[Sunstone]

Hmm...I'm thinking the form of discipline isn't as much of the issue as the attitude behind it.

Wouldn't the effects be the same regardless of one's attitude?

 

[waitasec]

Oh, and the rod mentioned in Proverbs was symbolism of God guiding us.

but it says punish...

guiding isn't punishing...thats inflicting a penalty
guiding is giving advice

 

[waitasec]

It's called symbolism. But punishment, done the right way, can be a guiding force. Your parents must have punished you for various things, without beating you- time outs, grounding, etc.

no, i got the belt...old school parents.

with my son he gets his games taken away...

 

[Banner]

Wouldn't the effects be the same regardless of one's attitude?

No that's what I'm saying is the difference. When discipline comes from love or caring...it's different.

 

[ChristineES]

but it says punish...

guiding isn't punishing...thats inflicting a penalty
guiding is giving advice

Most parents I know talk to their children when a punishment is given out to make sure they understand why they are being punished. If a parent punishes a child but doesn't say why, then you would be right. A murderer knows why he is going to jail, because he or she killed someone. It's a penalty and hopefully an deterrent for other people doing the same thing and if the person is ever released from prison from ever doing it again. That, in a way, is guidance.
But this whole thread is not giving out punishment but how a parent does it. Spanking can work, but it also can have side effects that people don't want. That is why a lot of think another way of discipline is better than spanking. I am sure most parents give out punishment, but not all of them do it overly harshly.

 

[Sunstone]

No that's what I'm saying is the difference. When discipline comes from love or caring...it's different.

So you would expect a scientific study of outcomes, if one were possible, to show a difference in a child's life depending on whether he was spanked in love or not spanked in love? I'm not arguing. I'm just seeking to clarify.

 

[waitasec]

Most parents I know talk to their children when a punishment is given out to make sure they understand why they are being punished. If a parent punishes a child but doesn't say why, then you would be right. A murderer knows why he is going to jail, because he or she killed someone. It's a penalty and hopefully an deterrent for other people doing the same thing and if the person is ever released from prison from ever doing it again. That, in a way, is guidance.
But this whole thread is not giving out punishment but how a parent does it. Spanking can work, but it also can have side effects that people don't want. That is why a lot of think another way of discipline is better than spanking. I am sure most parents give out punishment, but not all of them do it overly harshly.

you'd think the holy book would have a sure fire way of rearing children other that resorting to tactics that seem to be perpetuating a notion that brawn over fragility is the way to get kids in line...and if you do not use brawn, then you don't love your kids.

 

[waitasec]

i haven't read any passages that gives parents advice other than using the rod when it comes to disciplining children, perhaps you or anyone else can point the way