"Neighbor boys peep at my scantily clad daughters. Should I have them cover up?"

[Skwim]

in this context, its one who sees herself as more then something to be desired by men. And because she feels that way about herself, she doesnt dress in a way to catch a mans eye because she has better and more important things on her mind.

So what is it that's always occupying a "respectable" woman's mind that's more important than the attention of men: The dirty dishes still in the sink? The economy? What Amanda's anesthesiologist might say to Jake on "All My Children"? :slap:

 

[Pegg]

So what is it that's always occupying a "respectable" woman's mind that's more important than the attention of men: The dirty dishes still in the sink? The economy? What Amanda's anesthesiologist might say to Jake on "All My Children"? :slap:

haha... well maybe you should ask one and find out

 

[blackout]

So what is it that's always occupying a "respectable" woman's mind that's more important than the attention of men: The dirty dishes still in the sink? The economy? What Amanda's anesthesiologist might say to Jake on "All My Children"? :slap:

the attention of women.:flirt:

 

[Acim]

I assume if you were in that situation you'd be willing to tell the girls they couldn't dress as they wanted, but would have to dress in a way acceptable to Mike and Mary. Interesting.

I assume you are using straw-man.

Im sure if it was a dirty old man coming to have a perv, their father would be rushing them into the house and making them cover up quick smart.

Do you Skwim, or others who think Mike has to shove it, agree with this? That if it were Mike the dirty old man, or let's say registered sex offender who was looking, and only looking, not doing anything but looking, that things would be different? Or do you think letting girls dress as scantily as they desire is completely hunky dory regardless of audience?

 

[Skwim]

haha... well maybe you should ask one and find out

Just as I suspected; you don't even know. .

the attention of women.:flirt:

Ah ha. Read that, Pegg? Respectable women are thinking about getting attention from other women. Hold on while I adjust my hetero-male sexual imaging system to get a clearer picture.

. . . . . . . . . . . . Ah, there we go. Two respectable women in normal thinking mode.

"Are you thinking about me?"
"Yes. Are you thinking about me?"
"Of course. We're both respectable women."
​

 

[Acim]

So what? The boys are not a dirty old man.

But why would this matter given the principle of the situation (for some)? Either scantily clad females is non issue for just looking or magically it becomes an issue depending on audience.

And that's fine, but evidently mom and dad aren't that concerned with what others think of their girls.

I would say dad isn't necessarily fine with it. He's not bent out of shape over it like Mike may (or may not) be.

For me, the issues is about 'getting along with the neighbors who are making a request.' If I were dad in this situation, and Mike came over and demanded I dress my daughters differently all the time, I'd be more inclined to tell Mike to shove it. I would still listen up to a point and have discussion up to a point, but if it were only righteousness being espoused, I would probably have little willingness to accommodate. But if neighbor Mike or anyone on block makes a request, I'd want to discuss it with hopefully a reasonable, amicable resolution being found.

Because people should structure their lives to please others? To accommodate others? To placate others? Because two parents don't like their boys indulging themselves in their sexual curiosity, quite normal behavior by the way, two other unrelated people, the girls, are expected to change their behavior. I don't buy it.

How one dresses equals behavior? I don't think people "should" structure their lives to please others, and yet, there is something to be said for living in community and manifesting positive relations with neighbors who make requests.

 

[Draka]

So what is it that's always occupying a "respectable" woman's mind that's more important than the attention of men: The dirty dishes still in the sink? The economy? What Amanda's anesthesiologist might say to Jake on "All My Children"? :slap:

"Doctor to doctor, she should have woke up about an hour ago."



As to the OP, with the wife.
If the parents don't have an issue with how their own daughters dress while working in the hot sun then it shouldn't be any of the neighbor's business to say anything. he should talk to his sons if it bothers him. It's not like they won't see much more and much worse in their lives.

As to respectable and intelligent women cover up...intelligent and respectable women tend to know there is nothing wrong with the human body and are not ashamed of it. Also, that if it's hot out that we should be able to dress as coolly as we can. I mean, what's the difference between a man working outside in just a pair of shorts and no shirt and a woman doing the same thing wearing shorts and a tank top or bikini top? Hell, the woman is wearing more than the man anyway. Yet somehow it isn't "respectable" for her to do so? It's not a matter of respectable, it's a matter of double standard.

 

[angellous_evangellous]

Yet somehow it isn't "respectable" for her to do so? It's not a matter of respectable, it's a matter of double standard.

Now that's ironic.

 

[angellous_evangellous]

I have an IQ over 150 (according to the internet) and I dress like a whore when it's hot out. So there goes that theory.

:biglaugh:

 

[Reverend Rick]

If you daughters where to cover up, the boys next door would just find their eye candy somewhere else. It is the boys who have the problem or more likely the father of the boys if the truth where told.

 

[Gentoo]

this is true, women are beautiful no matter what they are wearing. But the type of clothing they wear says something about how they view themselves and either way, their clothing is going to draw attention to themselves.

I guess it depends on who's attention, or the sort of attention, you want to attract. A man is more likely to respect you if you have respect for yourself first.

IMO, this is the same line of thinking that leads to scantily clad women being raped and the rapist saying that they wanted it based on their clothing choice...

 

[bobhikes]

Shove it does it for me.

 

[Alceste]

:biglaugh:

You laugh, but I had to take four different internet IQ tests to score that high. It's not easy to become a genius. No laughing matter.

 

[Skwim]

I assume you are using straw-man.

No. Simply a hypothetical.

Do you Skwim, or others who think Mike has to shove it, agree with this? That if it were Mike the dirty old man, or let's say registered sex offender who was looking, and only looking, not doing anything but looking, that things would be different? Or do you think letting girls dress as scantily as they desire is completely hunky dory regardless of audience?

I believe the "audience" does matter.

But why would this matter given the principle of the situation (for some)? Either scantily clad females is non issue for just looking or magically it becomes an issue depending on audience.

See above comment.

I would say dad isn't necessarily fine with it. He's not bent out of shape over it like Mike may (or may not) be.

Which is why I said "evidently" and not "necessarily."

How one dresses equals behavior?

I believe how one presents themselves can be considered a form of behavior.

I don't think people "should" structure their lives to please others, and yet, there is something to be said for living in community and manifesting positive relations with neighbors who make requests.

I do too; however, I also think one has to weigh requests to determine their reasonableness, and in this case I don't consider Mikes request to be reasonable. He is expecting others to modify their behavior instead of expecting his two boys to modify theirs. If he can't control his two sons it's unreasonable to put that burden on someone else.

As to the OP, with the wife.
If the parents don't have an issue with how their own daughters dress while working in the hot sun then it shouldn't be any of the neighbor's business to say anything. he should talk to his sons if it bothers him. It's not like they won't see much more and much worse in their lives.

As to respectable and intelligent women cover up...intelligent and respectable women tend to know there is nothing wrong with the human body and are not ashamed of it. Also, that if it's hot out that we should be able to dress as coolly as we can. I mean, what's the difference between a man working outside in just a pair of shorts and no shirt and a woman doing the same thing wearing shorts and a tank top or bikini top? Hell, the woman is wearing more than the man anyway. Yet somehow it isn't "respectable" for her to do so? It's not a matter of respectable, it's a matter of double standard.

If you daughters where to cover up, the boys next door would just find their eye candy somewhere else. It is the boys who have the problem or more likely the father of the boys if the truth where told.

 

[Father Heathen]

If you daughters where to cover up, the boys next door would just find their eye candy somewhere else. It is the boys who have the problem or more likely the father of the boys if the truth where told.

My question is how is natural sexual attraction a "problem"?

 

[Alceste]

My question is how is natural sexual attraction a "problem"?

If they were my sons, I'd be more worried if they weren't leering at the scantily clad neighbour girls.

 

[Acim]

No. Simply a hypothetical.

Can't even bring yourself to admitting to straw-man.

Nice.

I believe the "audience" does matter.

See above comment.

You don't address why the audience matters, which would possibly have direct implications on what this thread is about. Mike is referencing a "certain element" and you are more or less agreeing that a "certain element" would matter, but not so far explaining why.

Which is why I said "evidently" and not "necessarily."

And I'm saying dad is not evidently fine with it, otherwise there wouldn't be the question asked / doubt raised.

I believe how one presents themselves can be considered a form of behavior.

And what form of behavior are the scantily dressed girls presenting?

I do too; however, I also think one has to weigh requests to determine their reasonableness, and in this case I don't consider Mikes request to be reasonable. He is expecting others to modify their behavior instead of expecting his two boys to modify theirs. If he can't control his two sons it's unreasonable to put that burden on someone else.

You don't know what Mike is expecting. He made a request and you are assuming he is doing nothing in relation to his sons, thus you are presenting once again straw man.

And again, the 'behavior' thing is a bit of a stretch.

Also I think the principle at work would change on a dime if it were Mike coming over and saying his 30 year old brother-in-law, a registered sex offender, is looking on the girls who are dressing this way. Suddenly dad may have desire to 'violate the girl's simple, most innocent, behavior' because of a 'certain element.' Which in reality nothing would be all that different, since we are just talking about 'people looking.' If girls want to dress however girls want to dress, then why would dad care who the audience is, as long as they stay to themselves?

But methinks with stigma that goes along with 'registered sex offender' people on this thread who agree with wifey would magically change their position in a heart beat.

Not realizing that the 'certain element' hasn't changed from what Mike is getting across. And only thing that has changed is perception of superficial stuff at work. Suddenly it would be all about 'protecting the daughters' and to hell with their rights to dress however they see fit.

 

[beenie]

Meh, life is full of temptations. Deal. Go wifey.

 

[Sunstone]

My question is how is natural sexual attraction a "problem"?

I don't want to put words in Rev. Rick's mouth but I took his statement simply as meaning the boys have the problem or challenge of dealing with their own desires, and they shouldn't expect the girls to do it for them by covering up. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's how I read it.

 

[Sunstone]

Meh, life is full of temptations. Deal. Go wifey.

Exactly! Nothing is preventing those boys from learning how to handle their sexual desires -- except, perhaps, the attitude of their father, who it appears wants to teach them to make their sexual desires someone else's responsibility.