Nobody wants me

[Trailblazer]

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

 

[Secret Chief]

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

Personally I think that is the right attitude. You do not need to compromise.

 

[Revoltingest]

I wonder how I'd fare on a dating site?
Ew.

 

[JustGeorge]

I wonder how I'd fare on a dating site?
Ew.

Pretty sure I wouldn't do very well, myself.

I'm grateful to not have to be in a position to use one. They sound very difficult, from what all my RFian friends have indicated...

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

I like you the way you are, too.

 

[Revoltingest]

Pretty sure I wouldn't do very well, either.

Unlike me, you're really weird.
Best stay...

 

[PureX]

Maybe you should be looking for a friend/roommate instead of a husband. You did say you live in a big house.

 

[Trailblazer]

I wonder how I'd fare on a dating site?
Ew.

You are lucky you don't have to find out.

 

[JustGeorge]

Unlike me, you're really weird.
Best stay...

I was lucky to find one just about as weird as me... I don't think that'll happen twice.

But, I do love that show...

My oldest son's father was much like Peg, just with added shouting and abuse. I'd work, and as soon as the check came in, he'd totter in in his figurative heels to rip the check from my hands. So brow beaten was I, I just made a face like 'ol Al...

One day, him being irritated with my overall dispassion told me "you just sit around this house like Al Bundy!" I looked at him, yawned, and stuck my hand down the front of my pants in typical Al fashion....

Man, was he ****ed off, but it was worth it...

 

[Trailblazer]

Maybe you should be looking for a friend/roommate instead of a husband. You did say you live in a big house.

Others have recommended that but I don't want a friend/roommate, I want a husband.
I guess that is because that is what I had for 37 years.

I never had a roommate even before I was married. I don't need a roommate for the income since I don't need any money, and I would feel uncomfortable with someone living here unless I was married to them. Maybe I would feel differently if I had a really close friend, but my best friend @Truthseeker lives in Ohio and he is already married! My other friends, @JustGeorge and @Sgt. Pepper are also married, and all the Baha'is in my local community are also married.

 

[Trailblazer]

I should not say that 'nobody wants me' because there is one man who might want me, but there are problems with him moving to where I live, and I cannot go to where he lives. Isn't it always something?
But stay tuned, I might be able to at least get him to come here and see what it's like. It is better than where he is now, I know that.

 

[ChristineM]

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

You are you and you are going your own way.

I've mentioned before, a companion who can help with the cats and other chores as well as having someone to talk to, all without the commitment. Worth thinking about

 

[Alien826]

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

Trust me, loneliness is far better than a marriage to someone that you don't get along with. Two suggestions to all seekers of partners.

1. Live alone for long enough to discover that you don't need to be with someone else. That will stop you making bad choices out of desperation.

2. Try to be totally yourself when you first meet. DO NOT try to find out what he wants and BE that person. You'll never keep it up. And by presenting yourself as you are you will put off those that you won't get along with.

It looks like you have already done both things. If you feel sad, think of the misery you have avoided.

Incidentally, the above is not foolproof. The other person can be misrepresenting himself, and even if he is honest, people change.

 

[Sand Dancer]

It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.

Did you list any hobbies that someone can identify with?

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

I don't have anyone, either.

I wonder how I'd fare on a dating site?
Ew.

I can picture it now:

 

[dybmh]

I don’t care enough about sex

Forgive me, but, have you tried a dating website for asexuals? Assuming such a thing exists.

 

[Secret Chief]

Forgive me, but, have you tried a dating website for asexuals? Assuming such a thing exists.

I'm sure there is.

- 2022 Best Aesexual Dating Sites & Apps Reviews for Asexuals

 

[Trailblazer]

Trust me, loneliness is far better than a marriage to someone that you don't get along with.

I definitely believe that, even though I have not experienced it, and that is why I am going to be super careful.

 

[Secret Chief]

Pretty sure I wouldn't do very well, myself.

Nonsense. Weird is more interesting than normal.

 

[Trailblazer]

1. Live alone for long enough to discover that you don't need to be with someone else. That will stop you making bad choices out of desperation.

I already know that I don't need to be with someone else, but I will discover if I want to be with someone else or not, and that will all depend upon who that someone else is.

 

[Trailblazer]

Did you list any hobbies that someone can identify with?

Cats are the only hobby I have time for, but men who like cats are few and far between, at least on dating sites.
I know there are lots of men who like cats on RF, but that doesn't do me any good.

I found one man on Spiritual Singles who really likes cats as much as I do, and I sent him a message, but so far I have gotten no reply. But the problem is that lots of other things need to line up for two people to be compatible, not just the cats.