My husband didn't know he was a cat guy until after we were married.
@Trailblazer , my son loved the cat pictures.
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Nobody wants me
- Thread starter Trailblazer
- Start date
My husband didn't know he was a cat guy until after we were married.
@Trailblazer , my son loved the cat pictures.
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
He does not live anywhere, he is a nomad, so it makes more sense for him to come to where I live.If one does that, my advice is you would both have to move. I have experienced that situation, when one has to move, it needs to be a joint effort.
Regards Tony
I own three houses in this area and I still have a job, so I cannot pick up and move.
The problem is that he has MCS so he has convinced himself that he cannot live anywhere except out in the desert at higher elevations. I don't know how true that is but it's his life. I will be talking to him again to find out more about this.
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
That could happen with Mike, if he ever saw the cats. I'll tell you more about that when I respond to your PM.
Audie
Veteran Member
Oh you are just repeating what others sayIt took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.
I am not sad. I am fine with this realization
I honestly don't think you do. You don't want "a husband," you want somebody who has to be around, while you continue to do as you please, without much concern for that somebody.
Sorry, but here's the truth -- you want somebody in your life, then you both have to make adjustments. If you want somebody else in your life, then you have to accept that they are just that -- somebody else, their own person, with their own needs and quirks. If you can't cope with that, then you really should give up the search, because as it is, yours is totally selfish -- and selfish is a terrible thing in a real relationship.
muhammad_isa
Veteran Member
Don't be so melodramatic !
Not well is my conjecture.
PoetPhilosopher
Veteran Member
If @Revoltingest brushed his teeth and practiced good hygiene and didn't bring home old junk all the time and didn't shave weasels and didn't do any of that other stuff and existed in the real world and not as a Simpsons character, and was 20+ years younger and single... well, let's just say...
50 years younger would be great.
I once had the body of a Greek god.
Now I've the body of a goddam Greek.
(A well educated friend found an ancient
statue in a book that was me spit'n image.)
There is a discipline called 'Public Relations' which specializes in helping people to get along with others. One time in college someone (a fellow student) in this discipline tried to help me, and that is why this occurred to me as a possibility. Sadly this person had to leave the college and so didn't finish, but I could see that they had a real interest in helping people meet other people. It was their passion. Obviously there are public relations firms, but I was suggesting just talking to a student in PR, maybe someone looking to practice their trade, maybe someone affordable to employ for a side gig.
Public Relations people are the people who help politicians businesses and others to promote themselves. They start with a solid foundation in communications, so they'll be up on how to use social networks. Maybe they can see where you are weak at presenting yourself. Maybe they can get you introduced to the right people, too or direct you better.
I'm sure that you aren't the only person disappointed by dating web sites.
Twilight Hue
Twilight, not bright nor dark, good nor bad.
muhammad_isa
Veteran Member
Bismillah ..
Brian2
Veteran Member
It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.
I am not sad. I am fine with this realization
My wife has started to foster care cats. More work than she thought. We have only 3 at the moment, cute but smelly at times and we are always worried something will happen to them.
Brian2
Veteran Member
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
That is absolutely false as well as cruel. I do not want somebody around just to be around. I want a loving relationship where both parties are happy and have their needs met, whatever those are. I can do what I please now so why would I want a man around just to have him around?
Of course I would have to make 'some' adjustments. I have said that time and again, but the cats and my religion are non-negotiable, and I say that up front, so if a man is averse to the cats or my religion he doesn't even bother to contact me, except sometimes to tell me that he doesn't think we are compatible.
A man does not have to share my religion but if his values and interests differ markedly from mine, the relationship would never even get off the ground. Moreover, I don't have to have sex just because a man wants sex, I am not a prostitute. If a man wants a lot of sex then I am not the woman for him and I have told men that. I might want some sex with a man if I love him, and we were married, but I would never promise that since I cannot guarantee how I will feel.
I am not selfish just because I don't want to get involved with a man whose values and interests differ markedly from mine. Such a man would not want to get involved with me either, which is why I cannot find anyone. Is the man also selfish because he does not want to make any adjustments for me?
I am anything but selfish. I did everything for my late husband and he did nothing for me for most of the last 20 years we were married. He even admitted that. Many times over, he told me I should get a divorce and marry another man who could do what he could not do, or did not want to do, but I told him I never would because I did not want to be married to anyone else. When we used to have sex, I even did that, but I don't want to get into that here. It is no small wonder that I don't want sex, since sex was just more work that I had to do.
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
There is nothing melodramatic about that... It is just the truth.Don't be so melodramatic !
I said I am fine with this realization because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. That is hardly melodramatic.
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
No, some men have messaged me just to say how disappointed they are, and they have been on these dating sites for years, me only a few months.
Trailblazer
Veteran Member
Your wife sounds like my kind of person!
PoetPhilosopher
Veteran Member
I said in another of your threads, @Trailblazer , that I was bad at flirting, and that's why I don't have anyone. But I think I can be more specific and say:
Why I'm probably single, is that even when I see someone that I might be interested in, I can't usually bring myself to tell them. There are a couple of single men who caught my eye, but they haven't made any passes at me, and I can't bring myself to initiate first.
Why I'm probably single, is that even when I see someone that I might be interested in, I can't usually bring myself to tell them. There are a couple of single men who caught my eye, but they haven't made any passes at me, and I can't bring myself to initiate first.
muhammad_isa
Veteran Member
I don't think you need to..
Try visiting local places of worship .. whichever takes your fancy .. meet people .. pray .. you never know what might be round the corner.