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Nobody wants me

Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Snow White said:
Why I'm probably single, is that even when I see someone that I might be interested in, I can't usually bring myself to tell them. There are a couple of single men who caught my eye, but they haven't made any passes at me, and I can't bring myself to initiate first.
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That is interesting. I guess you are referring to men you see in person. I have never been good at initiating in person, but I have been doing a lot of initiating on the dating sites and some men who responded with a "no thanks" even told me I had courage for reaching out to them. At first I was a little worried about getting rejected but I don't care anymore. The worst that can do is ignore me or respond and say we are not a match, so it would only be my false pride preventing me from sending a man a message, if I thought he could be a match. The men don't usually respond, but if I don't initiate they probably won't either, but some men have messaged me who probably would not have if I had not messaged them first.
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
muhammad_isa said:
I don't think you need to..
Try visiting local places of worship .. whichever takes your fancy .. meet people .. pray .. you never know what might be round the corner.
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There are no local places of worship for Baha'is and I would feel awkward going to a church, since I am not a Christian. I do pray, but not for a man, just to get through the day!
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
And another thing is that I am sick of these dating sites trying to get my money. They are money-making operations. I am not signing up for any more and paying just to find the same situation as the other sites. eharmony was the last one I signed up for, but only because I got a huge discount. I thought it was supposed to be so good but it is the worst of all the dating sites for matching me with the wrong men. The only dating site that is worth anything is Spiritual Singles and it is only 12 dollars a month for a premium membership.
 
muhammad_isa

muhammad_isa

Veteran Member
Trailblazer said:
There are no local places of worship for Baha'is and I would feel awkward going to a church, since I am not a Christian..!
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I don't let that bother me.
I have attended a JW Kingdom Hall, and a Methodist Church, and a C of E church in the last few months.

I don't like the "son of God" thing, but I llke meeting people. :)
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
muhammad_isa said:
I don't let that bother me.
I have attended a JW Kingdom Hall, and a Methodist Church, and a C of E church in the last few months.

I don't like the "son of God" thing, but I llke meeting people. :)
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I guess if the Christians find out you are a Muslim it could be uncomfortable, because most Christians don't understand how much Muslims love Jesus, but it is worse for a Baha'i if a Christian finds out that we believe Christ has returned, and it was not Jesus!
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Brian2 said:
No, never has been. Closer to an atheist than a Christian.
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I'm shocked. I was sure way back when we were on BUE that you told me she was a fundamentalist Christian, but maybe I was thinking of someone else. Oh wait! I just remembered who I was thinking of, a coworker who is a liberal Christian and has a fundamentalist Christian wife. Whew! For a minute I thought that my eidetic memory was failing me.

So this explains why you talk to so many atheists, that is your comfort zone. :D
I have been propositioned by a few atheists on dating sites and I would not have problem with dating or even marrying an atheist, but these men were much younger than me and they were looking for casual sex rather than marriage.

So, how does it work out being married to a nonbeliever?
 
Truthseeker

Truthseeker

Non-debating member when I can help myself
Trailblazer said:
It took a little while, being on several dating sites, but I understand now. No men want me because I care too much about God and my cats and I don’t care enough about sex and having a good time, eating, drinking, recreating, and traveling. God and my cats are in the way.

I am not sad. I am fine with this realization :) because I am not going to give up what matters most to me just so I won’t have to be alone. I will wait until I find someone who likes me the way I am, but even if I never find anyone, I will always know that God and the cats still love me just the way I am.
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Bravo! I do too, though I'm not a husband prospect, and I'm not there in person. Being there in person makes a difference.
 
Brian2

Brian2

Veteran Member
Trailblazer said:
I'm shocked. I was sure way back when we were on BUE that you told me she was a fundamentalist Christian, but maybe I was thinking of someone else. Oh wait! I just remembered who I was thinking of, a coworker who is a liberal Christian and has a fundamentalist Christian wife. Whew! For a minute I thought that my eidetic memory was failing me.

So this explains why you talk to so many atheists, that is your comfort zone. :D
I have been propositioned by a few atheists on dating sites and I would not have problem with dating or even marrying an atheist, but these men were much younger than me and they were looking for casual sex rather than marriage.

So, how does it work out being married to a nonbeliever?
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I don't talk to my wife about Jesus, religion etc. She does not want to hear. It's all fairy tales to her.
There are problems with being married to a non believer. That is an area we have no connection in.
 
muhammad_isa

muhammad_isa

Veteran Member
Trailblazer said:
I guess if the Christians find out you are a Muslim it could be uncomfortable..
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No, I make it very clear what I believe .. I don't participate in Holy Communion .. eating bodies and drinking blood :eek:

One vicar tried to tell me that I didn't believe Jesus was Divine, and I just told him "I'm not playing that game" we both believe in God and Jesus, and that's all that matters. :)

Trailblazer said:
..it is worse for a Baha'i if a Christian finds out that we believe Christ has returned, and it was not Jesus!
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Oh dear :)
What can I say now..
 
Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Truthseeker said:
You don't want to. You don't need your job economically, you could sell your houses.
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No, I do not need the job for money but I want it for other reasons.
I am going to quit my job and sell my houses for a man? Why should I do that?

He has no house and he has no job so it makes more sense for him to come here and live. If he doesn't want to do that he can live out in the desert in his car all by himself for the rest of his life.
 
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Trailblazer

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Brian2 said:
I don't talk to my wife about Jesus, religion etc. She does not want to hear. It's all fairy tales to her.
There are problems with being married to a non believer. That is an area we have no connection in.
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I am still in shock, because all these years I have known you, since 2014, I had thought your wife was a Christian.
So what brought you and your wife together originally? Was it romantic love?

In spite of other problems we had, I always had belief in God in common with my late husband, since he was a Baha'i, although we argued about whether God is loving all the time. :rolleyes:
Also, we both loved cats, and that was a real bonus.
 
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