• Welcome to Religious Forums, a friendly forum to discuss all religions in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Access to private conversations with other members.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon!

Quiet, introverted people

Chisti

Active Member
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?
 

Madhuri

RF Goddess
Staff member
Premium Member
Not so hard, but it can become difficult to make a large circle of friends because they don't know how to get close to you. That was my problem in high school. People liked me but I was so quiet, I never got very close to people (with some exceptions).
 

Renji

Well-Known Member
Not really. It's just that it could be hard to have more friends. My classmates now in college that I'm mean and snobish because I am so quiet. But still, there are some people who are interested to be friends with me.
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
Not so hard, but it can become difficult to make a large circle of friends because they don't know how to get close to you. That was my problem in high school. People liked me but I was so quiet, I never got very close to people (with some exceptions).

I want to get to know you! *slaps Malini on back, sticks cigar in her mouth, lights it* Have a present! Let's Party!
 

Noaidi

slow walker
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?

No, not really. I'm not much of a people-person (never have been), so I'm happy in my own company. Social situations, such a parties and gatherings, terrify me, so I avoid them whenever possible. I am very close to a few people, but they can be counted on one hand!
My philosophy is the less people I deal with socially, the less people to p*** me off!
 

Erebus

Well-Known Member
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?

I always hated being the quiet one yes, it became incredibly frustrating being on my own with nothing to do. Unsurprisingly I took the typical LHP approach and went about reversing the situation. I was agoraphobic and misanthropic so it wasn't easy, but I made myself attend every night out and party that came my way and pretended to enjoy them. Now the weird thing about pretending to enjoy something is that after a while you genuinely do enjoy it.

Admittedly I went from one extreme to the other over time, so I've recently started to balance myself. I've cut out illegal drugs completely and cut out about 75% of the quantity I used to drink. Now, my ideal weekend is a quiet pub with a few drinks and a bunch of friends having a chat and a laugh. A nice middle ground between not going out at all and going to the busiest club and getting hammered.

I guess what I'm saying is that if being quiet and introverted suits you, then by all means stick with it. If it doesn't, then it isn't something you have to put up with, you can do something about it.
 

Madhuri

RF Goddess
Staff member
Premium Member
I want to get to know you! *slaps Malini on back, sticks cigar in her mouth, lights it* Have a present! Let's Party!

:D I think these days I'm much more open and chatty in public. I used to have trouble with small talk. That's all changed since high school, but I'm still more on the introverted side.
What about you Phil?
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
What about you Phil?

A psychologist told me once that I was an introvert very close to the line between introvert and extrovert. He seems to have based his assessment on the fact I have no issues with being alone, and even prefer being alone when I'm tired. His notion was that a genuine extrovert might often enough prefer to be around others when tired -- in order to re-energize themselves.
 

Madhuri

RF Goddess
Staff member
Premium Member
A psychologist told me once that I was an introvert very close to the line between introvert and extrovert. He seems to have based his assessment on the fact I have no issues with being alone, and even prefer being alone when I'm tired. His notion was that a genuine extrovert might often enough prefer to be around others when tired -- in order to re-energize themselves.

Yeah, the main difference seems to be that an introvert loses energy through social interaction while an extrovert gains energy from social interaction.
I think I'm on the border too. I can gain energy and be very energetic in certain social/public situations but then I need a few days alone to recuperate.
 
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?
Not really. I am a homebody who loves solitude and lots of clear space on her calendar! :)
.
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
Yeah, the main difference seems to be that an introvert loses energy through social interaction while an extrovert gains energy from social interaction.

That's almost word for word what the psychologist told me. :)
 

Kilgore Trout

Misanthropic Humanist
Growing up, I thought I was shy or introverted, and many people tended to have a problem with me because I seemed snobby and aloof because I didn't speak to many people, and came off like I was better than them.

When I got older, I realized that I was actually just snobby and aloof, didn't like talking to many people, and was better than people I didn't want to talk to.
 

Chisti

Active Member
Growing up, I thought I was shy or introverted, and many people tended to have a problem with me because I seemed snobby and aloof because I didn't speak to many people, and came off like I was better than them.

When I got older, I realized that I was actually just snobby and aloof, didn't like talking to many people, and was better than people I didn't want to talk to.

But I am so sweet and innocent, yet people think I am a snob just because I don't speak to anyone.:sad4::sad4:
 

Chisti

Active Member
Another question out of curiosity. Do strangers immediately assume you're introverted just by looking at you? Do you have the look, the look that totally exposes you as an introvert even to people who know nothing about you?
 

Orias

Left Hand Path
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?

During certain situations, yes. People often want to converse and be social at school when I am just sitting there working in my notebook or posting here.

Otherwise people generally accept my "differentness".

And I have been considered charming by a lot of people, though I speak few words ;)

I have to be honest, people affairs just anger me because I don't care at all what people think about me, or what people do to each other. I think a large majority of the world is ill-perceptive and dare I say stupid.

I care about what effects me, which may or may not be social affairs, but words only cause harm and hurt, as well as trust and side taking. I prefer to just be, so I stick with the saying, "I like being more than I like being liked".
 
Last edited:

Orias

Left Hand Path
Another question out of curiosity. Do strangers immediately assume you're introverted just by looking at you? Do you have the look, the look that totally exposes you as an introvert even to people who know nothing about you?

Heh, I try not to judge, but I often do get "looks" of disapproval.

I've been told that I am intimidating and creepy, and I love to feed off of it :D
 

fenrisx

Member
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?


sometimes the wisdom is from those who remain quiet and watch and listen, not those so outspoken
 

Skwim

Veteran Member
The highly extroverted and highly introverted are both "abnormal" in that they sit at the extreme ends of the behavioral scale. My bet is that a fair sampling would produce a pretty good Bell Curve between the two.
 

TurkeyOnRye

Well-Known Member
Do you find it hard to live in this world where anyone 'outgoing, charming, extroverted' is considered normal, and anyone 'reserved, quiet' is abnormal, weird?

I definitely do not find "charming" synonymous with extroverts. I also don't agree that "extroverted=normal, introverted=abnormal" is the status quo. Having said that...

It's not difficult, exactly, though it can be annoying at times to deal with motormouths, loudmouths and airheads. Just what do they think we're thinking when they're moving their jaws like bear traps? Most of the time, I have a hard time understanding why some people will explain something in 1000 words when they could better make their point if they just kept their gaping maw shut.
 
Last edited:
Top