Should Spanking Your Children Be Illegal?

[Ozzie]

As a person who was hit as a child, I believe that it affected me negatively.

I don't know whether hitting children should be legal or illegal. I do know that it should never happen.

If you are not prepared to treat your child in public as you treat them behind closed doors then you should not do it (legality being a technicality that condones what happens behind closed doors in the English tradition).

 

[Fluffy]

If you are not prepared to treat you child in public as you treat them behind closed doors then you should not do it (legality being a technicality that condones what happens behind closed doors in the English tradition).

Unfortunately, some of what I have seen done to children in public makes my faith in this particular principle shaky.

 

[Mr. Peanut]

Yes it is. If children are being mistreated in the name of 'discipline', or indeed for any other reason that is the governments business. Children are citizens with rights too.

Hi!

I disagree. When my children were 2-4 or so, they occasionally needed a swat on the rear to straighten them out. Of course abuse is different, but we are talking spanking. The states want to raise our children, tell them what to believe, one is even fighting home-schooling, we live in an increasingly state ruled indoctrination nation.

Cheers!

 

[angellous_evangellous]

Hi!

I disagree. When my children were 2-4 or so, they occasionally needed a swat on the rear to straighten them out. Of course abuse is different, but we are talking spanking. The states want to raise our children, tell them what to believe, one is even fighting home-schooling, we live in an increasingly state ruled indoctrination nation.

Cheers!

I believe that the same state (MA) who wants to ban spanking also wants to ban homeschooling.

It's a great idea for states like Kansas, but where the parents are competent home-education is infinately better than the incompetent state (like Texas education, which George Bush completely destroyed).

 

[Mister_T]

The key question then is whether disciplining a child can harm that child. The next questions are who is responsible for ensuring children do not get harmed and who is responsible for ensuring that those who are responsible, respect their responsibilities.

I don't believe spanking harms a child. It is one of the oldest forms of disciplining children and it's been acceptable and considered as such until recently it seems.

The parents are responsible for insuring that they do not over discipline their child. If a child is being over disciplined, then I think that is the only time any outside parties are justified to interfere.

 

[Ozzie]

Unfortunately, some of what I have seen done to children in public makes my faith in this particular principle shaky.

So you should not treat your own in that way.

 

[Ozzie]

I don't believe spanking harms a child. It is one of the oldest forms of disciplining children and it's been acceptable and considered as such until recently it seems.

The parents are responsible for insuring that they do not over discipline their child. If a child is being over disciplined, then I think that is the only time any outside parties are justified to interfere.

The fact of spanking being "old" also speaks of conservatism. Any disciplinary practice that is corporal or otherwise that is deemed to "benefit" children can only be justified in terms of what it might teach. What does spanking teach?

 

[Mister_T]

The fact of spanking being "old" also speaks of conservatism.

Is conservatism bad or something?

What does spanking teach?

The same thing that any form of punishment does: Don't do that.

 

[Luke_17:2]

It does no harm, and does indeed do some good. -If used correctly.

A parent should only spank when he/she can control his/her anger, and be sure that it suits the offence. A parent should NEVER haul off and slap, UNLESS the child's offence warrants it.

In answer to the question, no. I don't think it should be illegal. Making it illegal belittles real abuse. Every generation has been brought up with it, and only now that people don't are kids going out of control. Now, if you don't want to spank, it's your parental decision, and you're in the best position to make a decision regarding your child. But I think it's the best form of punishment. I always used it, and quite frankly, my kids (now grown) thank me for raising them up in the way they should go.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I spanked my children on the rare occasion when they needed a moment where sudden attention was necessary........running out to the street, grabbing a book of matches, most things that were deemed dangerous to themselves or to others. Those moments in time necessitated an immediate and strong message sent to them that they needed to "wake up" immediately to what they were doing. And I never spanked them hard enough to see them cry. And, I never spanked our autistic son because of his extreme sensitivity to touch. It would have been counter-productive.

I don't think spanking ought to be illegal, but then again, I'm in favor of the Zen master using his stick to whack practitioners on the side when they lax in their meditative practices. Maybe I've been hit too many times in the ribs when I was a Zen practitioner back in the day. I dunno.

And banning homeschooling? That's old news..........we've never been the popular sort. Most homeschoolers have to do quite a bit to make sure the truancy officer from the school district stays off our doorsteps.




Peace,
Mystic

 

[Engyo]

I am reminded of the fact the "Baby Grace" died while being disciplined...........

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

It is banned in Most of Europe.
The UK has taken a half way house...
you can smack but you must not leave a mark, or you can be prosecuted

 

[Mister_T]

you can smack but you must not leave a mark, or you can be prosecuted

That seems fair enough to me.

 

[Panda]

If a parent can hit a child than a child should be allowed to hit a parent if the parent does things they shouldn't.

 

[sandandfoam]

Hi!

I disagree. When my children were 2-4 or so, they occasionally needed a swat on the rear to straighten them out. Of course abuse is different, but we are talking spanking. The states want to raise our children, tell them what to believe, one is even fighting home-schooling, we live in an increasingly state ruled indoctrination nation.

Cheers!

It always amazes me that anyone thinks it is a good idea to inflict pain on a child.And if you are not going to slap hard enough for it to hurt why slap at all?

Negative reinforcement does not work, positive reinforcement does. Spanking or slapping is negative reinforcement. If your interest is what is best for the child research shows that it is not slapping.
Slapping shows children by example that violence is acceptable. Violence should never be acceptable.
How would you feel if someone twice your size hurt you for your own good?

Home schooling has nothing to do with slapping

 

[fullyveiled muslimah]

I think people are mixing up abuse with a spanking. They are not the same thing at all. I was spanked but I was never abused. Looking back on it, I needed those dang-on whoopins. Mama was right, because continuous disobedience to her directly in her face in unacceptable as well. She gave me chances to get it together, and when I didn't I had what was comming to me. The only difference I put into place was when I spanked. I raised my two younger siblings with spankings. My oldest, now 20 thanks me for those spankings even though she can count on one hand how many times I actually had to do it. Islam teaches never ever to slap to the face ever, never leave marks ever, and never spank when you're angry. Calming down before you attempt to hit a child is a good way to ensure that you don't over do it. Many times after I calmed down I didn't even spank them unless it still warranted it.

I don't like blatant disobedience. I can't stand disrespect either. I respected the space and persons of my sibs, and i expected that they in turn respected me enough to do the oh-so-simple stuff I wanted of them. When they didn't do that, and just disrespected me to my face it was intolerable. Stuff I don't go for is, standing toe-to-toe with me in my house in a yelling match, walking off when I'm talking to you, slamming doors in my face as you storm off in a huff. I'll have none of that, and if I have to slightly rough you up so be it, you'll think twice about it too next time. My youngest boy hates any form of authority no matter how lenient it is. He live with his father now too cuz I ain't takin that. He's a big boy and felt that because he was 6'5 he could stand over me in an imposing manner...uh uh! I had to take the wind out of his sails, then I sent him to his pappy. Much better relationship. Not that it was bad before, but I had to establish that getting older does not give the right that he could tell me to **** off when he felt like it.

 

[Sunstone]

I think spanking is usually counter-productive.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

Terrible! Kids need to be spanked or smacked for discipline. Thats why i am so perfect.

 

[Luke_17:2]

If a parent can hit a child than a child should be allowed to hit a parent if the parent does things they shouldn't.

Who has lived longer, and therefore is most likely wiser? Who pays for the food that the family eats, the shelter they live it, the clothing they wear?

The parents! The children haven't had the oppurtunity because they're still children. They need to learn, and experience. Thus, they have no right dictating to an adult what he should or shouldn't do.

It always amazes me that anyone thinks it is a good idea to inflict pain on a child.And if you are not going to slap hard enough for it to hurt why slap at all?

stephen, just because it amazes you doesn't mean it's wrong.

Negative reinforcement does not work, positive reinforcement does. Spanking or slapping is negative reinforcement. If your interest is what is best for the child research shows that it is not slapping.

Have you raised children? I can say that it does work from experience.

Child research is done by people who are biased against it. Those studies have to always be taken with a grain of salt.

Slapping shows children by example that violence is acceptable. Violence should never be acceptable.

Kids are not as stupid as you think they are. They're not so stupid to think, "I just got hit; it means that I can hit others." Now, they are inexperienced, and lacking in wisdom which is why they need guidance. -There are those of us who think some "negative" reiforcement is just the proper road sign...

Secondly, slapping/spanking is not violence: it is punishment. Abuse is violence

How would you feel if someone twice your size hurt you for your own good?

Well, when I was a kid, it told me that what I just did was wrong...

Home schooling has nothing to do with slapping

The state telling parents how to raise their children has everything to do with both.

I think spanking is usually counter-productive.

How so?

 

[Mr. Peanut]

It always amazes me that anyone thinks it is a good idea to inflict pain on a child.And if you are not going to slap hard enough for it to hurt why slap at all?

Negative reinforcement does not work, positive reinforcement does. Spanking or slapping is negative reinforcement. If your interest is what is best for the child research shows that it is not slapping.
Slapping shows children by example that violence is acceptable. Violence should never be acceptable.
How would you feel if someone twice your size hurt you for your own good?

Home schooling has nothing to do with slapping

Hi!

Well enough, then. Regardless of my own views on spanking, I do not like the government that far in my business. Not that I worry for myself, I have already raised my own children without the need for anything but an occaisonal light smack on the behind when they were in their "terrible two's"...three's...or so. Call it old fashioned, but sometimes its the only thing that shuts up a screaming 3 year old. They will push the limits as far as they can, trust me.

A wise man once said:

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame. Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

And for balance:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

And for those who enjoy even more great wisdom:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye ********, and not sons. Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.

Cheers!