The Kindness Box

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness meaning life -

We need always to imagine the turmoil, disappointment, worry and sadness in people who may outwardly appear merely aggressive and ‘bad’. We need to aim for compassion in an unexpected place: at those who annoy us most.

Other people are almost only ever nasty because they are in pain. The sole reason they have hurt us is because they are – somewhere deep inside – hurting themselves. They have been catty and derogatory and foul because they are not well. We don’t have to hurt them back even more.

Aphorisms on Kindness -

 

[Geoff-Allen]

From Pema Chodron:

The "sending" aspect of tonglen comes from another angle, but it also fosters this feeling of openness and connection to the experience of others. Each time we exhale, we imagine sending other beings all the beneficial and pleasurable things we normally desire for ourselves. Sometimes, you can be very concrete. For instance, if you are thinking about a homeless person, you could breathe out food and shelter. Or you can send others universal qualities that everyone could use, such as kindness, well-being, relaxation and warmth - this is how I tend to approach the practice. In the case of the homeless person, I might send them the feeling of being loved because I know how important it is for people to feel loved, especially when they are outcast by society.

Remind me to post a link about Tonglen meditation - quite a few to choose from ...

How to Practice Tonglen

We begin the practice with a heart committed to helping others, to being with suffering and dying. When we look deeply, we see that to help others, we must relate with kindness toward our own suffering. To deny our suffering is to close off our hearts to what we and others experience. If we touch our suffering with awareness and love, Giving and Receiving becomes a practice of transformation. To see the possibility that we and others can be free from suffering is to see our own vast, good, and tender heart.

Read more -

tonglen — Archive — the Mindfulness Bell

All the best!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Leads to ...

Joan Halifax kindness - mainly the results are for compassion but that's in the same ball-park as kindness isn't it?

Here's one -

Invitation for Empathy and Compassion Experts to be Interviewed by Edwin Rutsch

Scroll down to the interviews with various "experts" ...

Also look for Joan over on YouTube!

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Comes from the happify site!

What's So Great About Happiness, Anyway? (The Answer: Plenty!)

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness is number 3 on this list of self-care suggestions -

Pay it forward

It’s nice to be important, but important to be nice.

By helping others, we actually help ourselves, too. Lending a hand not only boosts mental health, but may also lead to a longer life.

Is it truly altruism if you also benefit? Well, you’re making other people happy! You get to be a little happy too. Volunteering can also positively affect self-confidence, self-esteem, and general wellbeing.

Read the full list -

25 Science-Backed Ways to Take Care of Yourself Every Day

All the best!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Leads to ...

It’s probably no surprise that lending a hand makes you feel good—after all, even a simple smile can be contagious. “Humans feel best when we feel useful,” says Emily Fletcher, founder of Ziva Meditation and gratitude expert. “[With volunteering], the reward is in the act itself—it allows people to feel more present.”

And while you’ve likely read about the benefits of mindfulness, studies suggest volunteering—especially when it’s a habit—provides long-lasting benefits.Health benefits of volunteering in the Wisconsin longitudinal study. Piliavin JA, Siegl E. Journal of health and social behavior, 2008, Feb. It can make you healthier and even add years to your life.Health benefits of volunteering in the Wisconsin longitudinal study.

Read more -

Why Volunteering Is Good for Your Health

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Why volunteer?

With busy lives, it can be hard to find time to volunteer. However, the benefits of volunteering can be enormous. Volunteering offers vital help to people in need, worthwhile causes, and the community, but the benefits can be even greater for you, the volunteer. The right match can help you to find friends, connect with the community, learn new skills, and even advance your career.

Giving to others can also help protect your mental and physical health. It can reduce stress, combat depression, keep you mentally stimulated, and provide a sense of purpose. While it’s true that the more you volunteer, the more benefits you’ll experience, volunteering doesn’t have to involve a long-term commitment or take a huge amount of time out of your busy day. Giving in even simple ways can help those in need and improve your health and happiness.

Comes from this excellent site about good mental health -

Volunteering and its Surprising Benefits - HelpGuide.org

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness gets a brief mention on this page about Choosing love no matter what - far easier in theory than practice?

Anyway, here is the article -

Choosing Love No Matter What

That's quite a good site if you have the time to check-out their various menus & pages ...

Enjoy your time with us here on the forum!

Ciao.

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness also gets a mention in this list of strategies -

Richard Wiseman shares a great study illustrating this point in 59 Seconds:

“A few years ago, happiness researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky and her colleagues arranged for a group of participants to perform five non-financial acts of kindness each week for six weeks. These were simple things, such as writing a thank-you note, giving blood or helping out a friend. Some of the participants performed one of the acts each day, while others carried out all five on the same day. those who performed their kind acts each day showed a small increase in happiness. however, those who carried out all their acts of kindness on just one day each week increased their happiness by an incredible 40 per cent.”

How to Be Happy: 26 Strategies Backed by Research

Enjoy your day!

 

[FineLinen]

“Our job on earth isn't to criticize, reject, or judge. Our purpose is to offer a helping hand, compassion, and mercy. We are to do unto others as we hope they would do unto us.” - Dana Arcuri-

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness appears as number 9 in this interesting list of suggestions -

9 Hidden Secrets For A Complete Happiness Transformation

Enjoy your day!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

The purpose of World Kindness Day is to look beyond ourselves, beyond the boundaries of our country, beyond our culture, our race, our religion, and realize we are citizens of the world. As world citizens we have a commonality, and must realize that if progress is to be made in human relations and endeavors, if we are to achieve the goal of peaceful coexistence, we must focus on what we have in common.

Comes from the greater good site -

Want Happiness? Practice Kindness

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Leads us here -

Every time I watch this hilarious video of a little girl cheering herself on, I think: Her parents must be pretty happy people. I don’t know for sure, of course, but my guess is that they model happiness and confidence and gratitude on a daily basis, and she’s simply copying them.

So whenever I see research which shows that parents are, on average, less happy than their childless counterparts, my heart sinks. Equally devastating to me is the research that reveals how my generation of women is unhappier than previous generations. If we aren’t happy, our children aren’t likely to be happy, either. And I really don’t want my children’s generation to follow in our unhappy footsteps.

100,000 Happier Parents: Are You Willing to be One?

Enjoy your day!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Just as we hunt for things to fix in life, we also tend to obsess over flaws in ourselves; our weaknesses loom large. But what if we put more time and attention into our strengths and positive attributes?

The Use Your Strengths exercise invites you to consider your strengths of character—from creativity and perseverance to kindness and humility—and put them into practice. Each day for a week, select a strength and make a plan to use it in a new and different way. You can repeat the same strength—directing your curiosity toward a work project one day and toward your partner’s interests the next—or work on different strengths each day. At the end of the week, synthesize the experience by writing about what you did, how it made you feel, and what you learned.

Five Science-Backed Strategies for More Happiness

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Happiness strategy kindness leads here -

Study participants who performed five acts of kindness every week for six weeks saw a significant boost in happiness. Their acts of kindness ranged from simple to significant, and included things like "bought a friend a sundae", "gave a homeless man $20.00", and "let my sister borrow my car". Other studies have found that we get a more significant boost in happiness when we buy something for someone else than when we spend money on ourselves.

Why does kindness increase our happiness? One simple reason is that helping someone in need can increase our awareness and gratitude for our own good fortune. Focusing on kindness to others also draws our attention away from our own problems or worries. Long ago, a famous psychiatrist prescribed two weeks of kindness to others as a sure cure for his depressed patients.

https://www.cathynoblick.com/single-post/2017/02/13/PRACTICE-ACTS-OF-KINDNESS

MUCH more at that blog - if you have the time that is ...

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Being kind to others is essential to finding a sense of personal happiness. Our human brains are wired so that we feel joy when we behave in altruistic ways. Just making plans to do something nice for others—whether it is throwing a party for a friend, volunteering your time for a worthy cause, or planning a monetary donation—will give you a boost and generate a sense of satisfaction and well-being.

Comes from this blog -

Happiness and Contentment: Still Not Available in a Pill

Enjoy!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

“No one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself,” said author Charles D. Warner.

Giving from the heart brings happiness. That’s a universal truth.

One of the underlying qualities that motivates us to give is kindness—a quality that takes an active interest in the welfare of others. Kindness is often shown through helpful acts, friendliness, hospitality, and a warmhearted demeanor.

Closely connected to giving and kindness is generosity, which is defined as the quality of being selfless and willing to give freely.

The Path to Happiness: 3 Key Ways to Show Kindness and Generosity — Relationship Counseling Center of Austin

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Interesting turn-of-events ...

There is a site called living life fully which has a mountain of quotes on nearly every conceivable topic ...

Anyway, I try this - Living life fully kindness - and it tosses up several but not the actual site I had in mind.

Yet to explore them - if you have the time - but here is the kindness page of quotes at the original site -

Too often, people make the mistake of believing that if they only had more money or more sex or a different partner or a better-looking body, they would feel the sense of "wholeness" they have always craved. Virtually without exception, this is not the case. What is actually lacking is the dimension of giving and kindness as a means of nourishing the soul. To add this dimension to your life is to nourish your soul.

Harold Kushner

quotes, quotations and passages about kindness

Scroll down maybe two-fifths down the page if you want quotes about forgiveness or happiness or wisdom or introspection or joy etc etc etc ...

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Kindness is becoming rare and sometimes if feels as though we live in a very hostile world. We are more connected than ever these days with social media and the 24 hour news cycle, so it is easy to become saturated with the conflict, politics, poverty and discord of the world around us. For people who work in high needs care industries; doctors, nurses, emergency service personnel, social workers, criminal lawyers; or ordinary people who care for elderly or ill family members, life can become a cycle of stress and trauma and they can begin to suffer from compassion fatigue.

Whether it is from too much exposure to ‘bad news’ or too much exposure to the suffering of people around us, we can start to show physical, mental and emotional symptoms. There’s no denying that this type of negativity is bad for our health.

6 Effective Ways to Bring More Kindness into Your Life

 

[Geoff-Allen]

More from that site -

Research shows that random acts of kindness not only boosts your physical health but also helps you to maintain positive outlook on life.

What’s more, it doesn’t have to be grand or expensive. By nature, we are hard-wired for love and compassion. We genuinely feel good when we give, help or contribute without expectation of reciprocation of acknowledgement. It can create a powerful ripple effect that people continue to pay forward what they have received. Thus, kindness is a win-win which brightens our community as a whole.

So, why not start today? Make kindness a daily habit. Make a difference in your life and someone else’s. Besides, kindness is contagious. What goes around comes around. It is particularly true with kindness. Show your kindness in any given moment, at any place and with anyone. They will remember your generosity and they will turn around and spread kindness to others as well. It will also be an excellent opportunity to teach your children to do the same and grow up to be kind adults.

More practical suggestions -

15 Simple acts of Kindness that will change your life