I own dark suckers which are powerful and numbers and suck the dark right out of you.
A Light In The Dark
Bell Labs Prove Existence of Dark Suckers
(Reprinted from the Bell Labs Newsletter)
For years it has been believed that electric bulbs emit light. However, recent information from Bell Labs has proven otherwise. Electric bulbs do not emit light, they suck dark. Thus they are now called dark suckers. The Dark Sucker Theory, according to a Bell Labs spokesperon, proves the existence of dark, that dark has a mass heavier than that of light, and that dark travels faster than light.